1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX
2
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
3
00:00:30,698 --> 00:00:34,910
BANDAI VISUAL, TOKYO FM
DENTSU, TV ASAHI
4
00:00:35,036 --> 00:00:36,912
and OFFICE KITANO Production
5
00:01:10,071 --> 00:01:12,615
Now, I'll move the platform.
6
00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:18,871
Hold your breath.
7
00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:26,378
Please relax.
8
00:01:31,258 --> 00:01:36,722
Producers:
Masayuki MORI and Takio YOSHIDA
9
00:01:52,947 --> 00:01:55,533
Cinematography by
Katsumi YANAGIJIMA
10
00:01:55,658 --> 00:01:58,327
Lighting Design by
Hitoshi TAKAYA
11
00:02:12,967 --> 00:02:14,844
Production Design by
Norihiro ISODA
12
00:02:14,969 --> 00:02:16,846
Sound Design by
Senji HORIUCHI
13
00:02:16,971 --> 00:02:18,848
Line Producer:
Shinji KOMIYA
14
00:02:26,564 --> 00:02:31,777
Music by
Shin-ichiro IKEBE
15
00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:35,406
Have you caught a cold recently?
16
00:02:38,075 --> 00:02:41,537
Anyone in your family had cancer?
17
00:02:52,006 --> 00:02:57,595
Written, Edited and Directed by
Takeshi KITANO
18
00:03:00,723 --> 00:03:03,309
Tell him to come himself next time.
19
00:03:30,461 --> 00:03:33,839
It all began with
a gangster film like this one.
20
00:04:45,661 --> 00:04:48,747
¥10,000 cooperation fee every month?
21
00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,750
Sign the contract?
22
00:04:54,211 --> 00:04:57,756
You're full of shit, you dirty bastard.
23
00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:01,510
That's right.
24
00:05:02,177 --> 00:05:03,262
You refuse?
25
00:05:03,971 --> 00:05:05,264
Damn right, you bastard.
26
00:05:39,006 --> 00:05:40,549
Get out of town.
27
00:05:51,769 --> 00:05:56,774
Gangster films like that
are what Kitano does best.
28
00:05:57,066 --> 00:05:59,902
Of all things, this dumb director
29
00:06:00,027 --> 00:06:02,029
in his interviews here and abroad
30
00:06:02,112 --> 00:06:05,783
proclaimed never to make another gangster film.
31
00:06:06,617 --> 00:06:08,619
He's used to making gangster films
32
00:06:08,744 --> 00:06:10,954
and had some box-office successes
33
00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:13,415
but since he said he wouldn't
34
00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:15,459
he simply can't make them anymore.
35
00:06:16,043 --> 00:06:17,127
That said,
36
00:06:17,252 --> 00:06:20,798
showing that violent scene
doesn't make much sense.
37
00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:24,927
In a return to
more traditional Japanese cinema
38
00:06:25,052 --> 00:06:29,098
like Ozu, idolized by directors like Wim Wenders,
39
00:06:29,223 --> 00:06:33,435
Kitano decided to shoot
the life of the common folk.
40
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,980
A heart-warming drama
with no violence.
41
00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:44,571
RETIREMENT
42
00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:56,667
Happy Retirement.
43
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:01,296
From tomorrow
you can do as you like.
44
00:07:03,465 --> 00:07:05,717
Working for that company was everything.
45
00:07:05,843 --> 00:07:08,095
I don't know what to do now.
46
00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:10,180
Why? You have your wife.
47
00:07:10,305 --> 00:07:12,558
You could do something for her.
48
00:07:23,986 --> 00:07:25,654
Where's Mr. Takagi today?
49
00:07:27,781 --> 00:07:30,367
We were drinking till just now
50
00:07:30,868 --> 00:07:32,578
but he took off.
51
00:07:33,162 --> 00:07:36,373
He probably thought
you should go home early today.
52
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:56,435
Sure you only want tea?
53
00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:59,021
Yes. I already ate.
54
00:08:01,064 --> 00:08:02,733
Happy Retirement.
55
00:08:12,701 --> 00:08:13,952
Where's Akiko?
56
00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:15,787
Not home yet.
57
00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:20,542
She's late.
58
00:08:21,502 --> 00:08:23,879
I wonder what happened.
59
00:08:24,213 --> 00:08:27,716
She always calls
when she's going to be late.
60
00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:45,067
What's the matter?
61
00:08:45,609 --> 00:08:48,153
I'll go and check.
62
00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:04,920
Something must have happened at the office.
63
00:09:06,421 --> 00:09:09,299
But she's not a child anymore.
64
00:09:33,782 --> 00:09:36,118
Is something wrong?
65
00:09:46,420 --> 00:09:48,505
Who wants to see
66
00:09:48,630 --> 00:09:51,550
a boring film spending 30 minutes
67
00:09:51,675 --> 00:09:53,719
on just drinking liquor and tea!
68
00:09:53,844 --> 00:09:58,974
Nowadays, terms like "common folk"
and "sentiments" don't count much.
69
00:09:59,141 --> 00:10:02,519
What remains
are only the filthy rich and the poor.
70
00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:06,565
Anyway, that man didn't look like
a retiring, hard-working office worker.
71
00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:09,359
More like an illiterate laborer!
72
00:10:09,568 --> 00:10:12,571
And compared to Ozu's works
73
00:10:12,779 --> 00:10:16,408
the film was also criticized
for "lacking class."
74
00:10:18,452 --> 00:10:22,164
For mainstream appeal,
a love story is a must.
75
00:10:22,289 --> 00:10:27,252
Kitano has not yet
made a tearjerker love story.
76
00:10:27,628 --> 00:10:30,339
That's it! That's what he can do!
77
00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:37,596
THE DOOR OF RECOLLECTIONS
78
00:10:43,518 --> 00:10:48,023
The idea was by a screenwriter
we knew.
79
00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:50,525
It's the story
of a man who loses his memory
80
00:10:50,651 --> 00:10:54,363
and the woman devoted
to helping him regain it.
81
00:10:54,529 --> 00:10:56,281
A story of love…
82
00:10:57,491 --> 00:10:59,242
Remember this place?
83
00:10:59,868 --> 00:11:03,455
I came here with my friends
when I was a student.
84
00:11:03,580 --> 00:11:06,291
We knew from where
the Jōmon Period was derived,
85
00:11:06,416 --> 00:11:10,379
but we had no idea
about the origins of the Yayoi Period.
86
00:11:10,504 --> 00:11:12,047
You were standing nearby.
87
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:16,468
"It's named after the town
where a shell mound was found."
88
00:11:16,551 --> 00:11:18,220
That's what you told us.
89
00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:22,724
We were convinced
you worked at the museum.
90
00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:27,813
You showed us around here
all day after that.
91
00:11:28,397 --> 00:11:31,650
Only later did you tell me
that you didn't work here.
92
00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:34,736
You were just here on your day off.
93
00:11:38,573 --> 00:11:41,743
But the screenplay
was missing its second half.
94
00:11:41,868 --> 00:11:43,912
We asked the writer about it.
95
00:11:44,079 --> 00:11:46,123
He said he had lost his memory.
96
00:11:46,248 --> 00:11:47,833
The project was aborted.
97
00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:52,921
To begin shooting
without a complete script
98
00:11:53,046 --> 00:11:56,341
was absolutely ridiculous,
and Kitano was again scolded.
99
00:11:58,552 --> 00:12:02,764
But he didn't give up
on making a tearjerker.
100
00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:07,018
Then came the story of the artist,
blinded in an accident, and his student
101
00:12:07,144 --> 00:12:09,604
who helps him become
the artist he once was.
102
00:12:09,688 --> 00:12:11,940
A moving love story.
103
00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:14,317
Sir.
104
00:12:15,277 --> 00:12:18,822
The rain has turned
the sky and sea gray.
105
00:12:20,824 --> 00:12:24,286
We can come here on a sunny day.
106
00:12:30,834 --> 00:12:33,462
The screenplay was flawless to the end.
107
00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:37,340
But the production designer said
108
00:12:37,466 --> 00:12:41,470
he had no idea
how a painting by a blind artist should look.
109
00:12:41,595 --> 00:12:44,306
We discussed it, but no one knew.
110
00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:45,891
The project was aborted.
111
00:12:48,643 --> 00:12:52,647
Why all these films
about women so devoted to men?
112
00:12:52,773 --> 00:12:55,984
Why not make films
about men devoted to women?
113
00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:58,862
So we decided
to make a tragic love story
114
00:12:58,987 --> 00:13:01,573
titled "The Chauffeur's Romance."
115
00:13:20,509 --> 00:13:23,887
Your chauffeur's great.
He always waits outside the car.
116
00:13:24,513 --> 00:13:27,682
Well, he's kind of weird.
117
00:13:27,808 --> 00:13:29,559
I tell him to wait in the car
118
00:13:29,684 --> 00:13:31,353
but he waits outside.
119
00:13:31,645 --> 00:13:33,480
Makes me feel guilty.
120
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:36,858
Maybe he likes you.
121
00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:39,069
How can you say that?
122
00:13:39,194 --> 00:13:40,362
You never know.
123
00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:41,696
That would be a problem.
124
00:13:41,822 --> 00:13:42,948
I agree.
125
00:13:43,073 --> 00:13:44,366
It is a problem.
126
00:13:47,577 --> 00:13:49,037
We thought so, too.
127
00:13:49,454 --> 00:13:51,706
A chauffeur-and-princess romance
128
00:13:51,873 --> 00:13:53,708
wouldn't get anywhere.
129
00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:55,377
Something spicier.
130
00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:59,506
A crook and a boutique girl
might work better.
131
00:14:28,076 --> 00:14:29,494
He's here again.
132
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:49,598
Another gangster character!
133
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:52,517
What we've been trying so hard to avoid!
134
00:15:06,114 --> 00:15:08,617
What sort of films
do people want to see?
135
00:15:09,034 --> 00:15:11,328
Looking at the world film market,
136
00:15:11,536 --> 00:15:14,664
ethnic and
nostalgic pieces are popular.
137
00:15:14,873 --> 00:15:18,501
A film reminiscing
the mid-50s was a big hit in Japan.
138
00:15:18,752 --> 00:15:23,340
The 50s to the 60s
were Kitano's childhood years.
139
00:15:23,632 --> 00:15:27,677
Kitano said, "Nobody knows
that period better than me."
140
00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:32,140
"I'll show you a real 50s piece."
That's how it started…
141
00:15:42,567 --> 00:15:43,735
What are you doing?
142
00:15:43,985 --> 00:15:45,403
I'm taking this.
143
00:15:46,112 --> 00:15:49,324
That's my car. You can't just take it.
144
00:15:49,491 --> 00:15:51,451
Someone dropped it here.
145
00:15:51,534 --> 00:15:53,536
What? I parked it here.
146
00:15:54,162 --> 00:15:57,165
This car wasn't dropped here.
147
00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:59,542
The car is parked here.
148
00:15:59,751 --> 00:16:01,294
So it's yours?
149
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:03,046
Yes, so please…
150
00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:05,966
What are you doing?
151
00:16:06,091 --> 00:16:06,716
You bum!
152
00:16:06,925 --> 00:16:07,842
I found it!
153
00:16:07,968 --> 00:16:09,177
I parked it here.
154
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:09,970
Gimme money.
155
00:16:10,095 --> 00:16:11,179
What are you saying?
156
00:16:14,307 --> 00:16:15,892
Don't touch my car!
157
00:16:19,688 --> 00:16:21,356
Help! Call the police!
158
00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:26,403
Hey, you snob!
159
00:16:26,945 --> 00:16:30,156
I say he found it!
160
00:16:31,533 --> 00:16:32,909
Finder gets 20%.
161
00:16:33,118 --> 00:16:33,743
Nonsense!
162
00:16:33,868 --> 00:16:35,328
I'll settle for ¥2,000.
163
00:16:46,423 --> 00:16:48,425
Scram.
164
00:17:24,210 --> 00:17:26,880
I'll never come back to this dump!
165
00:17:39,100 --> 00:17:44,939
COAL-TAR & RIKIDOZAN
166
00:17:50,111 --> 00:17:51,071
Honey.
167
00:17:51,196 --> 00:17:54,157
Don't strain your eyes.
Eat this and go to bed.
168
00:17:54,365 --> 00:17:55,283
Thanks.
169
00:18:19,390 --> 00:18:21,851
Making him study outside
to save on electricity!
170
00:18:21,976 --> 00:18:23,645
To spend money on booze!
171
00:18:23,770 --> 00:18:25,939
Why should a house painter study?
172
00:18:26,064 --> 00:18:28,775
You paint houses
because you didn't study!
173
00:18:29,025 --> 00:18:30,318
What did you say?
174
00:18:31,111 --> 00:18:32,654
I feed this family!
175
00:18:32,737 --> 00:18:33,822
How dare you!
176
00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:35,740
I work day and night
177
00:18:35,824 --> 00:18:38,159
to earn your booze money!
178
00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:40,328
I'll teach you!
179
00:18:40,495 --> 00:18:41,871
You bitch!
180
00:18:45,166 --> 00:18:47,335
Masao, go to bed.
181
00:19:01,182 --> 00:19:03,226
I'm your husband!
182
00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:12,235
Who do you think you are?
183
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:13,653
Wife beater!
184
00:19:13,778 --> 00:19:16,156
You only care about the kids.
185
00:19:17,282 --> 00:19:19,075
I'll show you who I am!
186
00:19:22,287 --> 00:19:23,872
All you do is drink!
187
00:19:25,582 --> 00:19:27,917
What did you say, bitch?
188
00:19:33,506 --> 00:19:35,008
Who do you think you are?
189
00:19:37,969 --> 00:19:39,596
I'm your husband.
190
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:00,909
Masao.
191
00:20:01,576 --> 00:20:03,077
I made you rice balls.
192
00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:05,079
Thanks, Mom.
193
00:20:19,719 --> 00:20:21,721
Back to work!
194
00:20:23,097 --> 00:20:25,600
Come on. Back to work!
195
00:20:44,869 --> 00:20:46,454
Who was that?
196
00:20:46,579 --> 00:20:47,956
The junk collector's son.
197
00:20:48,081 --> 00:20:49,791
Remember? We beat him up.
198
00:20:53,253 --> 00:20:54,921
A challenge to a duel.
199
00:20:56,965 --> 00:20:59,425
COME TO PIPE FIELD AT 3:00
200
00:21:11,312 --> 00:21:12,814
Which shall I choose?
201
00:21:12,939 --> 00:21:15,525
Hurry up, I haven't got all day.
202
00:21:15,650 --> 00:21:19,279
Come on. Just choose one.
203
00:21:19,404 --> 00:21:20,655
That one?
204
00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:21,948
Good boy. Here.
205
00:21:22,073 --> 00:21:22,991
Jackpot.
206
00:21:23,157 --> 00:21:24,867
There you go.
207
00:21:25,326 --> 00:21:26,703
Should be bigger.
208
00:21:26,828 --> 00:21:28,788
You chose it.
209
00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:29,539
It's big.
210
00:21:29,664 --> 00:21:30,999
Five yen. Pay up.
211
00:21:31,124 --> 00:21:32,292
Give me five yen.
212
00:21:33,418 --> 00:21:35,503
A 10-yen coin?
213
00:21:36,170 --> 00:21:37,797
Here's your change.
214
00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:39,007
Now go home.
215
00:21:39,132 --> 00:21:39,799
But I…
216
00:21:39,924 --> 00:21:41,843
Don't complain. Go on home.
217
00:21:49,267 --> 00:21:52,020
Eat that and you'll get dysentery.
218
00:21:52,687 --> 00:21:54,188
He's eating it.
219
00:21:55,231 --> 00:21:57,233
You're so stupid. You'll die.
220
00:21:57,358 --> 00:21:59,027
Die? Damn brats!
221
00:21:59,193 --> 00:22:01,195
You go home, too!
222
00:22:01,279 --> 00:22:02,864
Go on. Go home!
223
00:22:02,947 --> 00:22:05,199
I said go home. Damn brats!
224
00:22:45,490 --> 00:22:48,409
I am truly sorry for your loss.
225
00:22:48,576 --> 00:22:50,203
Please take care.
226
00:23:42,463 --> 00:23:44,048
What are you looking at?
227
00:23:44,507 --> 00:23:45,675
Go to bed!
228
00:24:17,331 --> 00:24:19,208
Bring the Rikidozan tights?
229
00:24:21,752 --> 00:24:24,714
All you did was paint them black.
230
00:24:25,089 --> 00:24:28,176
Did you bring
the Sharp Brothers trunks?
231
00:24:28,426 --> 00:24:29,677
Here.
232
00:24:31,679 --> 00:24:34,182
What are those? They're bloomers!
233
00:24:36,851 --> 00:24:40,521
They don't look anything
like Rikidozan's tights.
234
00:24:42,607 --> 00:24:44,859
Mine aren't like the Sharp Brothers either.
235
00:24:44,984 --> 00:24:45,902
They're fine.
236
00:24:46,110 --> 00:24:47,403
Well, let's begin.
237
00:24:57,038 --> 00:24:57,872
Fight!
238
00:24:57,997 --> 00:24:58,664
Rope break.
239
00:24:58,789 --> 00:24:59,707
Move away.
240
00:25:02,335 --> 00:25:03,252
Rope.
241
00:25:03,377 --> 00:25:04,253
Move away.
242
00:25:06,297 --> 00:25:07,173
Rope.
243
00:25:12,386 --> 00:25:13,262
Fight.
244
00:25:16,057 --> 00:25:16,891
Rope.
245
00:25:17,016 --> 00:25:18,434
I said move away.
246
00:25:22,813 --> 00:25:23,606
Rope, rope.
247
00:25:23,814 --> 00:25:24,941
Move away, jerk.
248
00:25:33,574 --> 00:25:34,408
One!
249
00:25:48,923 --> 00:25:51,801
One! Two! Three!
250
00:26:11,946 --> 00:26:14,115
What about the duel?
251
00:26:14,949 --> 00:26:16,158
We'll show up.
252
00:26:16,617 --> 00:26:17,535
Yeah.
253
00:26:17,702 --> 00:26:18,578
Yeah.
254
00:26:23,791 --> 00:26:25,001
Where's Mitsuo?
255
00:26:25,126 --> 00:26:26,836
He chickened out.
256
00:26:27,044 --> 00:26:29,297
He's such a coward.
257
00:26:33,301 --> 00:26:35,136
I'll kill you all.
258
00:26:52,945 --> 00:26:53,863
Now what?
259
00:26:54,071 --> 00:26:56,824
He lives in that junk yard, doesn't he?
260
00:26:56,991 --> 00:26:58,326
Let's take him there.
261
00:27:19,263 --> 00:27:20,556
Hello!
262
00:27:21,641 --> 00:27:23,225
Hello!
263
00:27:23,351 --> 00:27:24,685
Coming.
264
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:30,858
Why are you crying?
265
00:27:32,026 --> 00:27:35,071
Where did you find all this?
266
00:27:35,446 --> 00:27:39,367
This coat and guitar
are your dad's keepsakes.
267
00:27:39,784 --> 00:27:41,410
1958
268
00:27:41,911 --> 00:27:43,871
The right era
269
00:27:44,038 --> 00:27:45,998
but the wrong place.
270
00:27:46,457 --> 00:27:49,210
Poverty, discrimination
and domestic violence…
271
00:27:49,335 --> 00:27:52,088
Work instead of goofing off!
272
00:27:52,296 --> 00:27:55,049
Good-for-nothing!
273
00:27:55,174 --> 00:27:58,594
The bleeding will stop sooner or later!
274
00:28:14,402 --> 00:28:16,779
He said he wouldn't shoot violence
275
00:28:17,071 --> 00:28:19,407
but now he's gone too far!
276
00:28:27,832 --> 00:28:29,709
Come to think of it
277
00:28:30,084 --> 00:28:32,420
the genre standing out the most
278
00:28:32,545 --> 00:28:35,923
are horror flicks,
some even remade by Hollywood.
279
00:28:36,507 --> 00:28:40,594
Hey, Kitano hasn't tried his hand
yet with horror flicks.
280
00:28:41,095 --> 00:28:43,597
We decided it was time.
281
00:28:47,601 --> 00:28:53,399
NOH THEATER
282
00:30:03,594 --> 00:30:05,387
For ages, we've had
283
00:30:05,763 --> 00:30:09,642
a legend about a demon
that attacks and eats people.
284
00:30:09,767 --> 00:30:12,728
Well, it's only a legend.
285
00:30:13,813 --> 00:30:16,690
But about 3 years ago
286
00:30:17,107 --> 00:30:21,403
a headless body was found
and struck fear around here.
287
00:31:41,025 --> 00:31:42,610
Despite the make-up,
288
00:31:42,776 --> 00:31:45,404
the face didn't look very scary.
289
00:31:45,905 --> 00:31:50,159
And the title "Noh Theater"
was horrible for a horror flick!
290
00:31:50,576 --> 00:31:54,121
And why have girls
in a school uniform and a bikini?
291
00:31:55,456 --> 00:31:58,667
Some rumored it must be a comedy.
292
00:31:59,585 --> 00:32:02,254
This scene confirms it.
293
00:32:07,426 --> 00:32:08,385
Ouch!
294
00:32:15,309 --> 00:32:16,185
Ouch!
295
00:32:20,064 --> 00:32:21,440
Not again.
296
00:32:22,566 --> 00:32:24,860
That, too, was a disaster.
297
00:32:28,155 --> 00:32:31,909
Kitano had directed
12 films to date.
298
00:32:32,034 --> 00:32:35,245
Only one has been a box-office hit.
299
00:32:35,663 --> 00:32:38,958
Aiming for a hit…
A new type of period piece!
300
00:32:39,416 --> 00:32:41,460
No guns! Let's use swords.
301
00:32:41,585 --> 00:32:42,503
Swordplay!
302
00:32:42,753 --> 00:32:44,421
This will do the trick.
303
00:34:07,087 --> 00:34:12,718
BLUE RAVEN: NINJA PART 2
304
00:35:35,008 --> 00:35:36,176
Hey, hold it.
305
00:35:36,343 --> 00:35:37,469
Easy now.
306
00:35:38,220 --> 00:35:39,138
Don't kill him.
307
00:35:40,180 --> 00:35:42,683
Throw him into the old well.
308
00:35:42,933 --> 00:35:43,934
Yes, sir.
309
00:35:46,019 --> 00:35:48,605
Let's see how long he'll last.
310
00:36:14,715 --> 00:36:16,341
Is he dead?
311
00:36:17,718 --> 00:36:19,011
Put the lid on.
312
00:37:31,667 --> 00:37:34,461
Is that ninja still alive?
313
00:37:36,838 --> 00:37:40,092
We haven't heard a sound.
314
00:37:40,175 --> 00:37:41,510
He must be dead.
315
00:37:45,305 --> 00:37:46,348
Open it.
316
00:38:45,949 --> 00:38:48,660
It turned out
there was nothing new about it.
317
00:38:48,994 --> 00:38:51,955
How could such a mighty ninja
get caught anyway?
318
00:38:52,080 --> 00:38:55,042
Why was the attack so orderly?
319
00:38:55,167 --> 00:38:57,919
And why wait,
if jumping out the well was so easy?
320
00:38:58,045 --> 00:39:00,964
Just like Zatoichi opening his eyes!
321
00:39:01,089 --> 00:39:04,968
Someone suggested:
why not shoot "Zatoichi 2"?
322
00:39:05,552 --> 00:39:07,387
That was aborted.
323
00:39:13,143 --> 00:39:16,188
In today's movies, CG is a must.
324
00:39:16,563 --> 00:39:18,690
Considering Japan's CG technology,
325
00:39:18,815 --> 00:39:23,862
we should try a sci-fi blockbuster
taking place in a galaxy far, far away.
326
00:39:23,987 --> 00:39:25,530
We all agreed.
327
00:40:31,596 --> 00:40:37,811
THE PROMISED DAY
328
00:40:49,823 --> 00:40:51,783
Yes, this should do.
329
00:40:51,908 --> 00:40:53,452
Yes, sir.
330
00:40:57,664 --> 00:40:58,623
Carry on.
331
00:40:58,665 --> 00:41:00,292
Thank you, sir.
332
00:41:09,342 --> 00:41:11,052
You're still here.
333
00:41:25,275 --> 00:41:26,151
Hey.
334
00:41:27,694 --> 00:41:28,612
Yes?
335
00:41:31,072 --> 00:41:32,199
What's that?
336
00:41:36,036 --> 00:41:37,537
Why is it moving?
337
00:41:37,621 --> 00:41:38,830
Very strange.
338
00:41:40,540 --> 00:41:42,876
There shouldn't be an asteroid there.
339
00:41:43,084 --> 00:41:44,044
I know.
340
00:41:54,721 --> 00:41:56,890
Astronomical Observatory.
341
00:41:58,099 --> 00:41:59,184
Oh, Dr. Nakano.
342
00:42:00,393 --> 00:42:04,856
Yes… We were just talking about that.
343
00:42:06,650 --> 00:42:07,567
What?
344
00:42:09,402 --> 00:42:10,362
An asteroid?
345
00:42:13,615 --> 00:42:15,075
You confirm that?
346
00:42:16,785 --> 00:42:18,703
Intersecting with Earth's orbit?
347
00:42:20,247 --> 00:42:21,748
What? Within a week?
348
00:42:28,255 --> 00:42:30,507
An asteroid is approaching Earth.
349
00:42:31,007 --> 00:42:32,217
A common scenario.
350
00:42:32,801 --> 00:42:34,219
In a Hollywood film,
351
00:42:34,344 --> 00:42:38,431
a hero would appear
and set an H-bomb on the asteroid,
352
00:42:38,598 --> 00:42:40,809
like in a comic book.
353
00:42:42,310 --> 00:42:43,728
But one scientist discovered
354
00:42:43,853 --> 00:42:47,357
a human face on its surface.
355
00:42:48,108 --> 00:42:52,112
Two of these
would become the main characters.
356
00:43:05,083 --> 00:43:06,626
These noodles are terrible.
357
00:43:06,876 --> 00:43:09,921
I won't pay ¥800 for these.
358
00:43:18,638 --> 00:43:19,639
I have an idea.
359
00:43:23,476 --> 00:43:24,436
Let's use this.
360
00:43:27,647 --> 00:43:28,940
Hey, waiter!
361
00:43:32,152 --> 00:43:34,321
What the hell is this?
362
00:43:34,487 --> 00:43:37,532
You serve cockroaches
to your customers?
363
00:43:37,657 --> 00:43:40,285
One moment. I'll call the owner.
364
00:43:40,493 --> 00:43:42,120
Yeah, go get him.
365
00:43:45,665 --> 00:43:47,959
Boss! Boss!
366
00:43:57,844 --> 00:43:58,762
Hey.
367
00:43:59,471 --> 00:44:02,682
Too many leeches like you around.
368
00:44:03,600 --> 00:44:05,018
Hurry. Take it out.
369
00:44:05,143 --> 00:44:07,562
Who are you calling a leech?
370
00:44:09,689 --> 00:44:11,191
Take this, you bastard!
371
00:44:20,533 --> 00:44:21,743
Hurry up.
372
00:44:22,202 --> 00:44:23,370
Bastard!
373
00:44:27,290 --> 00:44:28,625
Give it to him!
374
00:44:31,169 --> 00:44:32,671
What are you doing?
375
00:45:07,414 --> 00:45:09,165
Scumbag!
376
00:45:56,838 --> 00:45:58,590
Get up!
377
00:45:58,798 --> 00:46:00,675
Ready?
378
00:46:07,182 --> 00:46:08,099
Boss!
379
00:46:09,809 --> 00:46:12,562
There seems to be another complaint.
380
00:46:23,990 --> 00:46:27,410
Ladies, something to say?
381
00:46:34,667 --> 00:46:37,670
What's in this soup?
382
00:46:37,879 --> 00:46:39,088
It's delicious.
383
00:46:39,798 --> 00:46:41,716
Cockroaches, of course!
384
00:47:01,611 --> 00:47:02,570
Thank you.
385
00:47:02,695 --> 00:47:03,988
Please come again.
386
00:47:10,703 --> 00:47:13,039
And that's how our story begins.
387
00:47:13,206 --> 00:47:16,042
But it can only go so far
with just two women.
388
00:47:16,376 --> 00:47:19,838
So we decided to throw in some men.
389
00:47:20,547 --> 00:47:24,759
Futoshi Kichijoji
a.k.a. "Masaru"
390
00:47:24,884 --> 00:47:27,470
and his double.
391
00:47:31,391 --> 00:47:36,729
WELCOME TO HOPES
(Higashi-Oizumi Politico-Economical Society)
392
00:48:08,011 --> 00:48:10,597
Let me present some of
393
00:48:10,763 --> 00:48:12,849
HOPES' activities.
394
00:48:14,350 --> 00:48:17,770
Tokyo's Sanya district
is named a UNESCO cultural heritage.
395
00:48:18,271 --> 00:48:20,607
Hanayashiki becomes a national park.
396
00:48:20,773 --> 00:48:23,735
HOPES has donated
¥500,000 for these causes.
397
00:48:24,444 --> 00:48:27,280
¥200,000 for
the Kagawa Buried Gold Project.
398
00:48:27,405 --> 00:48:30,158
¥200,000 for the preservation
of the Etchū-style loincloth.
399
00:48:31,451 --> 00:48:32,619
¥300,000 to construct
400
00:48:32,785 --> 00:48:35,288
Zorge Memorial Hall in Russia.
401
00:48:35,413 --> 00:48:36,956
¥200,000 to reinstate
402
00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:39,792
viper-mongoose fighting in Okinawa.
403
00:48:40,126 --> 00:48:43,087
For the rescue of the seal in Tama River
404
00:48:43,212 --> 00:48:46,466
and the humpback whale
stranded off Chōshi,
405
00:48:46,716 --> 00:48:49,761
HOPES donated ¥300,000.
406
00:48:50,303 --> 00:48:53,806
The construction of
Japan's Heavy Laborers' Memorial Hall…
407
00:48:54,140 --> 00:48:56,476
The Peace Triangle Project
408
00:48:56,643 --> 00:48:59,812
to connect Kagoshima,
Takeshima Island and Senkaku Isles…
409
00:49:00,313 --> 00:49:02,982
Promoting the independence of Hokkaido…
410
00:49:03,608 --> 00:49:05,818
Returning Okinawa to the US…
411
00:49:06,444 --> 00:49:08,321
A nuclear power plant in Tokyo Bay…
412
00:49:08,821 --> 00:49:11,991
Establishment of the Miura Shooting Range in LA…
413
00:49:12,325 --> 00:49:15,453
Launching of the Adachi Spy Satellite
414
00:49:15,578 --> 00:49:17,664
to deter crime in Tokyo…
415
00:49:17,872 --> 00:49:22,043
The passing of the Hair Piece Law
to ban fake hair…
416
00:49:22,168 --> 00:49:24,629
That's how HOPES has greatly contributed
417
00:49:24,754 --> 00:49:27,298
to Japan's culture and safety.
418
00:49:27,840 --> 00:49:31,803
Please welcome HOPES Honorary Chairman
419
00:49:31,886 --> 00:49:34,138
Daizen Higashi-Oizumi
420
00:49:34,263 --> 00:49:37,183
who'll speak to you
on this happy occasion.
421
00:50:22,979 --> 00:50:23,896
You!
422
00:50:24,230 --> 00:50:25,648
What are you laughing at?
423
00:50:29,068 --> 00:50:33,031
How could you laugh during
this solemn ceremony?
424
00:50:33,990 --> 00:50:36,409
Straighten up, you pathetic fools!
425
00:50:44,167 --> 00:50:49,589
Don't you realize the future
of Japan lies on your shoulders?
426
00:50:49,922 --> 00:50:54,552
How dare you laugh
at such trifle matters?
427
00:50:54,635 --> 00:50:57,055
If you laugh again, you're doomed.
428
00:51:00,141 --> 00:51:01,184
Gentlemen.
429
00:51:02,060 --> 00:51:05,021
Look straight into my face.
430
00:51:08,733 --> 00:51:09,776
You there.
431
00:51:09,859 --> 00:51:10,610
And you.
432
00:51:10,735 --> 00:51:12,111
I said look!
433
00:51:18,826 --> 00:51:20,787
Now please look this way.
434
00:51:21,079 --> 00:51:24,707
From the moment
your wife puts on these undies,
435
00:51:24,791 --> 00:51:27,335
your dull sex life
will change dramatically.
436
00:51:27,835 --> 00:51:30,463
Transform into a beast,
transcend time
437
00:51:30,588 --> 00:51:32,548
and sink into ecstasy!
438
00:51:32,673 --> 00:51:36,636
You'll be having sex
like newlyweds.
439
00:51:36,844 --> 00:51:40,056
"Darling, I can't wait for night-time."
440
00:51:40,306 --> 00:51:43,184
"Oh, please…
I'll cook anything you want."
441
00:51:45,770 --> 00:51:48,981
Fools! I told you not to laugh.
442
00:51:50,775 --> 00:51:52,151
Don't laugh!
443
00:51:52,527 --> 00:51:53,486
Don't!
444
00:51:54,695 --> 00:51:57,698
Alright. Now look down.
445
00:51:59,534 --> 00:52:00,743
Look down!
446
00:52:01,119 --> 00:52:02,161
Down!
447
00:52:14,799 --> 00:52:20,179
Alright, boys.
It's raffle time!
448
00:52:20,930 --> 00:52:23,683
First Prize is a color TV.
449
00:52:23,891 --> 00:52:27,186
Good luck for the turn of the wheel!
450
00:52:32,233 --> 00:52:33,359
Hold on.
451
00:52:38,489 --> 00:52:40,116
Come out. Come out.
452
00:52:44,745 --> 00:52:45,955
Patience is gold.
453
00:52:48,249 --> 00:52:49,125
There!
454
00:52:49,667 --> 00:52:51,377
What a pity.
455
00:52:51,544 --> 00:52:54,714
5th Prize is a pack of tissues.
456
00:52:55,673 --> 00:52:58,843
No golden balls
in the wheely!
457
00:53:00,011 --> 00:53:00,887
You!
458
00:53:01,429 --> 00:53:02,930
What's so funny?
459
00:53:03,764 --> 00:53:06,642
Alright. You can look up now.
460
00:53:12,398 --> 00:53:13,441
Don't laugh.
461
00:53:18,446 --> 00:53:19,322
Don't laugh!
462
00:53:45,389 --> 00:53:46,265
What happened?
463
00:53:46,390 --> 00:53:48,017
Are you alright?
464
00:53:48,142 --> 00:53:49,018
Yes.
465
00:53:50,394 --> 00:53:53,606
You jumped out of nowhere.
466
00:53:53,773 --> 00:53:55,942
I'm so sorry.
467
00:53:56,108 --> 00:53:57,276
Let's go to the hospital.
468
00:53:58,569 --> 00:53:59,612
I'm alright.
469
00:53:59,737 --> 00:54:01,364
Really, I'm fine.
470
00:54:02,323 --> 00:54:03,783
One thing, though.
471
00:54:03,950 --> 00:54:04,867
My foot hurts.
472
00:54:05,076 --> 00:54:06,452
Beg your pardon?
473
00:54:06,577 --> 00:54:08,037
My foot hurts.
474
00:54:08,329 --> 00:54:10,206
Some medicine money.
475
00:54:11,249 --> 00:54:12,041
Medicine money?
476
00:54:12,250 --> 00:54:13,209
- Yes.
- I see.
477
00:54:19,257 --> 00:54:20,132
Here…
478
00:54:20,258 --> 00:54:21,259
¥1,000.
479
00:54:30,768 --> 00:54:32,728
Let's part with a smile.
480
00:54:32,853 --> 00:54:34,397
- Thank you.
- Smile.
481
00:54:37,024 --> 00:54:37,817
Take care.
482
00:54:37,984 --> 00:54:38,651
Thanks.
483
00:54:39,318 --> 00:54:40,236
Be careful.
484
00:55:11,642 --> 00:55:13,269
An accident faker!
485
00:55:13,394 --> 00:55:16,355
Get hit by car, an expensive one.
486
00:55:16,522 --> 00:55:17,940
You do it!
487
00:55:18,065 --> 00:55:19,608
You're younger.
488
00:55:19,817 --> 00:55:21,193
Here comes one.
489
00:55:29,410 --> 00:55:30,619
Damn. It turned!
490
00:55:36,375 --> 00:55:38,544
What are you doing? Silly girl!
491
00:55:38,669 --> 00:55:40,880
It came from behind.
492
00:55:57,605 --> 00:55:59,065
Kichijoji.
493
00:55:59,523 --> 00:56:02,151
How come only you became a doll?
494
00:56:02,526 --> 00:56:03,986
I wanna be one, too.
495
00:56:04,612 --> 00:56:06,906
I'm an embarrassment.
496
00:56:21,379 --> 00:56:22,421
What's that?
497
00:56:24,423 --> 00:56:25,925
They must be rich.
498
00:56:26,967 --> 00:56:27,843
That's it.
499
00:56:59,291 --> 00:57:01,335
Welcome home, sir.
500
00:57:01,669 --> 00:57:03,546
Must be the house owner.
501
00:57:03,838 --> 00:57:07,383
The one in the student uniform
must be his son.
502
00:57:07,508 --> 00:57:09,385
But he looks like a doll.
503
00:57:09,510 --> 00:57:13,222
High class people
look as dignified as dolls.
504
00:57:19,437 --> 00:57:20,729
You fool!
505
00:57:21,105 --> 00:57:23,566
You still don't understand?
506
00:57:23,899 --> 00:57:27,069
Don't ride my pony.
507
00:57:27,862 --> 00:57:30,239
Sir, a call from Haguro Tradings.
508
00:57:30,364 --> 00:57:31,824
Got the money?
509
00:57:35,202 --> 00:57:37,580
Hello. Did you get the 200 million yen?
510
00:57:39,373 --> 00:57:41,167
I'll send someone right away.
511
00:57:41,792 --> 00:57:42,751
Hey, Kichijoji.
512
00:57:43,461 --> 00:57:46,755
Get the money from Haguro.
Take it to Professor Ide.
513
00:57:47,173 --> 00:57:49,175
Where's the chauffeur?
514
00:57:49,675 --> 00:57:50,426
Chauffeur!
515
00:57:50,551 --> 00:57:51,760
Bathroom, perhaps?
516
00:57:51,886 --> 00:57:52,595
Pull him out!
517
00:57:52,803 --> 00:57:55,097
I can drive.
518
00:57:55,473 --> 00:57:56,932
Junior, it's dangerous.
519
00:57:57,057 --> 00:57:58,767
I want to drive.
520
00:57:58,893 --> 00:58:01,020
Junior, don't go.
521
00:58:01,854 --> 00:58:03,314
Junior.
522
00:58:03,564 --> 00:58:06,192
Please don't do that.
523
00:58:06,358 --> 00:58:07,943
He is the son.
524
00:58:36,013 --> 00:58:39,725
Two morons from HOPES
will come and pick up the money now.
525
00:58:40,726 --> 00:58:43,562
HAGURO TRADING, INC.
526
00:59:21,767 --> 00:59:24,728
Are you the morons from HOPES?
527
00:59:24,853 --> 00:59:25,771
Yes!
528
00:59:25,896 --> 00:59:27,022
Get the money.
529
00:59:27,231 --> 00:59:28,107
Yes!
530
00:59:42,997 --> 00:59:44,206
I couldn't get it.
531
00:59:52,423 --> 00:59:53,382
Excuse me.
532
00:59:58,512 --> 00:59:59,888
Who the hell are you?
533
01:00:01,265 --> 01:00:02,975
Ouch.
534
01:00:07,646 --> 01:00:08,564
Ouch.
535
01:00:59,657 --> 01:01:02,951
You're really terrific, Kameda.
536
01:01:21,178 --> 01:01:23,639
Cool! Like a Matryoshka doll.
537
01:02:35,127 --> 01:02:36,044
Ouch.
538
01:02:57,441 --> 01:02:59,902
SUBMARINE
539
01:03:10,204 --> 01:03:11,914
I am Professor Ide.
540
01:03:23,884 --> 01:03:25,093
That hurts.
541
01:03:26,386 --> 01:03:28,096
Sorry. Used your gag.
542
01:03:30,557 --> 01:03:33,685
Money from Mr. Chairman.
543
01:03:35,312 --> 01:03:36,188
Thank you.
544
01:03:36,313 --> 01:03:38,190
I can develop a new project.
545
01:03:39,858 --> 01:03:43,278
You're very sharp. You noticed that.
546
01:03:43,403 --> 01:03:46,615
That robot performed well at the Gulf.
547
01:03:46,865 --> 01:03:48,951
Want to see its performance?
548
01:03:55,207 --> 01:03:57,543
Here it comes. Look!
549
01:04:02,381 --> 01:04:04,299
Look at that!
550
01:04:04,508 --> 01:04:05,634
It's super.
551
01:04:05,759 --> 01:04:07,970
It's just great!
552
01:04:08,262 --> 01:04:12,224
The robot might seem
bigger than it actually is.
553
01:04:12,349 --> 01:04:13,976
Don't be ridiculous.
554
01:04:17,020 --> 01:04:20,399
Actually, there's
something else I want you to see.
555
01:04:20,566 --> 01:04:22,484
Let's go. This way.
556
01:04:28,824 --> 01:04:30,909
I am Professor Ide.
557
01:04:36,582 --> 01:04:37,749
Okay.
558
01:04:38,041 --> 01:04:42,087
Use this and give me the cross ball.
559
01:04:42,796 --> 01:04:44,923
The ball is passed to Kichijoji.
560
01:04:45,048 --> 01:04:46,675
Here comes the cross ball.
561
01:04:46,800 --> 01:04:50,512
Waits for the ball,
and it's a bicycle-kick.
562
01:04:50,721 --> 01:04:53,098
Goooooal!
563
01:04:53,223 --> 01:04:55,601
What a miracle shot!
564
01:04:55,726 --> 01:04:57,769
It's a goal.
565
01:04:58,228 --> 01:05:01,440
Hey, wasn't that terrific?
566
01:05:01,565 --> 01:05:03,525
I named it Mr. Bicycle-kick.
567
01:05:03,650 --> 01:05:04,860
Coach Osim.
568
01:05:05,152 --> 01:05:07,279
Choose me for the national team.
569
01:05:09,489 --> 01:05:11,700
No need for praise.
570
01:05:12,075 --> 01:05:14,369
Come see another one.
571
01:05:14,494 --> 01:05:15,704
Shall we go?
572
01:05:37,517 --> 01:05:38,393
Huh?
573
01:05:41,813 --> 01:05:44,983
Hey, Mrs. Koenji.
574
01:05:45,359 --> 01:05:46,902
We know you're inside.
575
01:05:47,653 --> 01:05:49,988
We're from Daikoku Finance.
576
01:05:50,489 --> 01:05:53,241
At least pay the interest.
577
01:05:53,951 --> 01:05:54,826
Hey.
578
01:06:08,674 --> 01:06:10,300
PAY YOUR DEBTS
579
01:06:14,304 --> 01:06:16,014
I'll kill you, bitch.
580
01:06:17,224 --> 01:06:20,769
We're no ordinary loan sharks.
581
01:06:21,019 --> 01:06:23,855
Sell your kidney or liver.
582
01:06:24,731 --> 01:06:27,025
We ain't doing this for charity.
583
01:06:27,401 --> 01:06:32,114
Pay or else you'll be insured
and killed in the Philippines.
584
01:06:34,157 --> 01:06:36,201
We know you're in there.
585
01:06:36,326 --> 01:06:37,369
Come out.
586
01:06:38,495 --> 01:06:39,538
Murderer!
587
01:06:39,663 --> 01:06:40,288
Pay up!
588
01:06:40,497 --> 01:06:41,623
You thief!
589
01:06:41,748 --> 01:06:43,208
Pay your debts!
590
01:06:43,917 --> 01:06:45,794
Pay back your debts!
591
01:06:45,919 --> 01:06:46,878
Come out.
592
01:06:47,004 --> 01:06:48,130
Thief!
593
01:06:48,255 --> 01:06:49,297
Want more notices?
594
01:06:58,849 --> 01:06:59,891
We weren't recognized.
595
01:07:00,058 --> 01:07:01,393
How come?
596
01:07:01,518 --> 01:07:02,894
They're so dumb.
597
01:07:03,020 --> 01:07:05,814
We used our heads.
598
01:07:44,186 --> 01:07:47,439
White rice with mayonnaise.
599
01:07:48,190 --> 01:07:50,609
A perfect Japanese meal!
600
01:07:57,741 --> 01:07:59,826
Want some?
601
01:08:00,327 --> 01:08:03,205
No barking, no food.
602
01:08:03,330 --> 01:08:05,957
C'mon. Say woof.
603
01:08:06,083 --> 01:08:07,626
Say woof.
604
01:08:12,130 --> 01:08:13,799
Then, shake.
605
01:08:14,424 --> 01:08:15,550
Shake.
606
01:08:22,182 --> 01:08:23,141
Come forward.
607
01:09:28,331 --> 01:09:29,541
Front thrust.
608
01:09:29,916 --> 01:09:30,959
Begin.
609
01:09:43,221 --> 01:09:44,139
Begin.
610
01:09:54,608 --> 01:09:55,567
Begin.
611
01:09:59,696 --> 01:10:00,906
Damn!
612
01:10:04,784 --> 01:10:05,744
Begin.
613
01:10:13,126 --> 01:10:14,419
Do it right.
614
01:10:18,757 --> 01:10:19,758
Begin.
615
01:10:47,869 --> 01:10:50,664
Master Kichijoji is with us today.
616
01:10:50,789 --> 01:10:52,290
He will instruct you.
617
01:10:59,422 --> 01:11:02,467
First, he will show you his iron fist.
618
01:11:22,654 --> 01:11:23,822
Please begin, sir.
619
01:11:26,491 --> 01:11:28,994
Master, so sorry.
620
01:11:29,160 --> 01:11:30,829
I said to use the thin one!
621
01:11:30,996 --> 01:11:33,248
Sir, once more.
622
01:11:34,541 --> 01:11:36,084
Sorry, sir. Once more.
623
01:11:42,424 --> 01:11:43,508
Sorry, Master.
624
01:11:43,633 --> 01:11:45,677
Straight in front, I told you.
625
01:11:47,053 --> 01:11:49,431
Master, are you alright?
626
01:11:49,806 --> 01:11:52,183
So sorry. So sorry.
627
01:11:52,309 --> 01:11:54,019
Master, I can't breathe.
628
01:11:54,185 --> 01:11:56,771
So sorry, Master.
629
01:11:58,690 --> 01:12:02,027
Next, Master Kichijoji will
give individual lessons.
630
01:12:06,156 --> 01:12:10,201
Master, choose anyone you like.
631
01:12:26,009 --> 01:12:27,719
Mitaka, you've been chosen.
632
01:12:33,391 --> 01:12:35,143
Don't worry. He understands.
633
01:13:15,100 --> 01:13:17,018
I said go easy, you fool.
634
01:13:21,189 --> 01:13:22,607
A little easy.
635
01:13:26,611 --> 01:13:28,446
Think, dammit!
636
01:13:30,281 --> 01:13:31,199
So sorry.
637
01:13:31,574 --> 01:13:33,868
If you can't beat them, join them.
638
01:13:36,121 --> 01:13:37,038
So sorry.
639
01:13:37,539 --> 01:13:39,290
Winning isn't everything.
640
01:13:41,334 --> 01:13:42,293
So sorry.
641
01:13:43,253 --> 01:13:45,046
Look before you leap.
642
01:13:48,007 --> 01:13:48,967
So sorry.
643
01:13:49,467 --> 01:13:51,386
Let sleeping dogs lie.
644
01:13:54,305 --> 01:13:55,140
So sorry.
645
01:13:55,348 --> 01:13:58,309
Sometimes both sides lose.
646
01:13:59,936 --> 01:14:00,979
So sorry.
647
01:14:01,479 --> 01:14:04,649
Don't drink and drive.
648
01:14:06,025 --> 01:14:06,985
So sorry.
649
01:14:07,694 --> 01:14:09,988
Never too old to learn.
650
01:14:13,867 --> 01:14:15,410
I am so sorry.
651
01:14:42,604 --> 01:14:44,355
This coffee's terrible.
652
01:14:45,273 --> 01:14:47,609
I won't pay for it.
653
01:14:47,901 --> 01:14:49,527
Let's use this again.
654
01:14:57,410 --> 01:14:59,037
What's wrong with this coffee?
655
01:15:02,165 --> 01:15:03,625
The spoon melted.
656
01:15:51,297 --> 01:15:52,674
Oh, you're back.
657
01:15:53,800 --> 01:15:55,510
What happened to your arm?
658
01:15:57,095 --> 01:15:59,847
You got injured in karate?
659
01:16:00,431 --> 01:16:04,018
You're training yourself so hard for me.
660
01:16:04,143 --> 01:16:05,103
Thank you.
661
01:16:05,395 --> 01:16:08,690
Mr. Kichijoji, a woman
came and left this for you.
662
01:16:08,773 --> 01:16:10,441
A letter from a woman?
663
01:16:10,942 --> 01:16:12,777
Read the letter.
664
01:16:13,987 --> 01:16:16,447
What's wrong with you?
665
01:16:23,997 --> 01:16:27,875
Dear sir, please forgive me
for this abrupt memo.
666
01:16:28,126 --> 01:16:31,129
My name is Kumiko Koenji.
667
01:16:31,254 --> 01:16:33,298
After meeting the other day,
668
01:16:33,464 --> 01:16:37,051
my daughter, Kimiko,
became quite interested in you.
669
01:16:37,176 --> 01:16:39,637
We would like to meet you.
670
01:16:39,804 --> 01:16:43,975
Please come to the Arc de Triomphe
at 2 p.m. on the 10th.
671
01:16:44,100 --> 01:16:46,811
To the gentleman
in the school uniform.
672
01:16:47,437 --> 01:16:49,564
You're a man, after all.
673
01:16:49,772 --> 01:16:52,066
It's good to be liked by women.
674
01:16:55,320 --> 01:16:56,321
What's wrong?
675
01:17:19,844 --> 01:17:20,928
Wait. Wait!
676
01:17:21,054 --> 01:17:23,765
Wait. Wait. Wait!
677
01:17:25,475 --> 01:17:28,186
For the future of Japan,
678
01:17:28,311 --> 01:17:30,355
we need a man like you.
679
01:17:30,480 --> 01:17:32,940
Have your own family.
680
01:17:33,024 --> 01:17:36,527
Live for the future of Japan.
It's the right thing to do.
681
01:17:37,320 --> 01:17:41,199
Marry this woman as a favor to me.
682
01:17:41,574 --> 01:17:43,910
Think of me as your father.
683
01:17:45,244 --> 01:17:46,621
Please do it for me.
684
01:17:59,217 --> 01:18:01,219
Oops, wrong arm.
685
01:18:04,430 --> 01:18:05,973
Wrong arm again.
686
01:18:06,516 --> 01:18:11,062
I wonder if he knows about women?
687
01:18:11,229 --> 01:18:14,982
How does he usually spend his time?
688
01:18:15,692 --> 01:18:18,903
He should know how to make babies.
689
01:18:19,070 --> 01:18:20,655
You never know.
690
01:18:20,780 --> 01:18:22,573
He's full of surprises.
691
01:18:23,408 --> 01:18:25,993
Oh, yes. Get Dr. Rhythm Method.
692
01:18:28,538 --> 01:18:31,249
When a male reaches adolescence,
693
01:18:31,416 --> 01:18:35,586
sperm will normally
be made in the testicles,
694
01:18:35,753 --> 01:18:37,422
where they mature
695
01:18:37,547 --> 01:18:40,091
and wait for ejaculation.
696
01:18:40,383 --> 01:18:45,096
Intercourse takes place by inserting
the male sex organ into that of the female.
697
01:18:45,263 --> 01:18:46,347
Female sex organ!
698
01:18:46,472 --> 01:18:49,267
Piston movements of the hips
699
01:18:49,392 --> 01:18:51,269
cause rhythmic friction
700
01:18:51,352 --> 01:18:54,439
and the male ejaculates in ecstasy.
701
01:18:54,605 --> 01:18:55,523
Ejaculate!
702
01:18:55,773 --> 01:18:58,693
The sperm in the semen
head for the uterus
703
01:18:58,818 --> 01:19:00,111
and the ovum is
704
01:19:00,194 --> 01:19:01,028
fertilized.
705
01:19:01,154 --> 01:19:01,863
Fertilized!
706
01:19:01,988 --> 01:19:03,990
Thus, a baby is made.
707
01:19:04,198 --> 01:19:06,784
Basically, come inside and you make a baby.
708
01:19:06,909 --> 01:19:07,952
Come inside!
709
01:19:08,077 --> 01:19:09,287
That's how it goes.
710
01:19:16,043 --> 01:19:19,130
My name is Kumiko Koenji.
711
01:19:19,630 --> 01:19:22,550
After meeting the other day,
712
01:19:22,675 --> 01:19:25,970
my daughter, Kimiko,
became quite interested in you.
713
01:19:26,053 --> 01:19:29,557
We would like to meet you.
714
01:19:29,974 --> 01:19:34,562
Please come to the Arc de Triomphe
at 2 p.m. on the 10th.
715
01:19:35,146 --> 01:19:39,066
To the gentleman in the school uniform.
716
01:19:39,442 --> 01:19:41,402
Hey, where's Kichijoji?
717
01:19:41,527 --> 01:19:43,154
He left 2 days ago.
718
01:19:43,321 --> 01:19:45,490
He isn't back yet?
719
01:19:45,656 --> 01:19:46,866
The meeting's tomorrow.
720
01:19:46,991 --> 01:19:48,493
It's strange.
721
01:19:48,868 --> 01:19:52,079
Where's the meeting going to be?
722
01:19:52,163 --> 01:19:54,081
At the Cafe Arc de Triomphe.
723
01:19:54,999 --> 01:19:57,168
Don't tell me
724
01:19:57,293 --> 01:20:02,423
he went to
the real Arc de Triomphe in France.
725
01:21:00,523 --> 01:21:02,483
Why is he late?
726
01:21:30,970 --> 01:21:33,514
Did he really go to France?
727
01:21:33,598 --> 01:21:35,683
Yes, he said he'd be back soon.
728
01:21:36,851 --> 01:21:38,436
Call the young lady.
729
01:21:39,478 --> 01:21:40,771
Engagement ritual.
730
01:21:46,360 --> 01:21:47,445
It's good.
731
01:22:36,577 --> 01:22:39,497
Why are we taking the train?
732
01:22:40,539 --> 01:22:43,918
The house in Setagaya
must be his second house.
733
01:22:44,335 --> 01:22:46,921
He did mention a "main" house.
734
01:22:47,046 --> 01:22:49,590
It must be like a palace.
735
01:22:50,049 --> 01:22:50,925
A palace!
736
01:22:52,718 --> 01:22:53,761
A palace.
737
01:22:56,514 --> 01:22:58,182
Oh, a box lunch.
738
01:23:00,017 --> 01:23:01,185
Thank you very much.
739
01:23:03,688 --> 01:23:04,939
He's quite sweet.
740
01:23:05,064 --> 01:23:06,107
He is.
741
01:23:09,193 --> 01:23:10,528
What's this?
742
01:23:11,529 --> 01:23:13,197
Nothing for me?
743
01:23:13,739 --> 01:23:14,865
Damn you.
744
01:23:16,534 --> 01:23:17,451
Stingy.
745
01:23:21,080 --> 01:23:22,039
Go to hell.
746
01:23:25,668 --> 01:23:27,044
Mom, I was wondering…
747
01:23:28,379 --> 01:23:30,172
Remember the noodle shop?
748
01:23:30,381 --> 01:23:32,800
Why were masked men there?
749
01:23:33,217 --> 01:23:34,844
How should I know?
750
01:23:35,302 --> 01:23:36,220
And…
751
01:23:36,303 --> 01:23:37,388
What?
752
01:23:38,681 --> 01:23:40,641
When we tried to fake an accident,
753
01:23:40,766 --> 01:23:42,476
a small truck ran into me.
754
01:23:43,561 --> 01:23:44,729
That driver…
755
01:23:44,895 --> 01:23:47,398
Why did he fall out the truck?
756
01:23:47,523 --> 01:23:49,066
How should I know?
757
01:23:49,734 --> 01:23:50,985
It's his fault.
758
01:24:00,786 --> 01:24:01,996
Mom?
759
01:24:03,873 --> 01:24:06,333
Is this a train or a truck?
760
01:24:06,459 --> 01:24:07,168
Which is it?
761
01:24:07,293 --> 01:24:09,086
Stop asking me.
762
01:24:09,754 --> 01:24:11,005
Ask him.
763
01:24:24,810 --> 01:24:27,938
When things get rough, he becomes a doll.
764
01:24:28,105 --> 01:24:29,106
He's creepy.
765
01:24:29,231 --> 01:24:30,441
Watch out.
766
01:24:31,567 --> 01:24:34,278
Where the hell is your house?
767
01:24:40,951 --> 01:24:42,787
I don't believe this.
768
01:24:42,995 --> 01:24:44,288
Watch out.
769
01:24:52,004 --> 01:24:53,464
Who is he?
770
01:24:54,673 --> 01:24:56,383
Why is he there?
771
01:25:05,643 --> 01:25:07,311
Watch out.
772
01:25:08,354 --> 01:25:11,482
What the hell is wrong with this boat?
773
01:25:14,819 --> 01:25:16,654
How long must we walk?
774
01:25:17,113 --> 01:25:18,322
It's so far.
775
01:25:18,572 --> 01:25:21,492
Just one lonely road
with nothing around.
776
01:25:24,954 --> 01:25:26,664
You've come home!
777
01:25:29,542 --> 01:25:32,169
Is that your bride?
778
01:25:36,507 --> 01:25:38,509
Excuse me, is he…?
779
01:25:38,884 --> 01:25:40,219
He's my son.
780
01:25:40,678 --> 01:25:43,264
You must meet his father.
781
01:25:44,348 --> 01:25:46,517
Where is your house?
782
01:25:46,642 --> 01:25:49,019
See that over there?
783
01:25:54,358 --> 01:25:56,694
You live in a palace?
784
01:25:56,819 --> 01:25:58,279
No, the one in front.
785
01:26:04,577 --> 01:26:06,287
That dirty one?
786
01:26:06,412 --> 01:26:07,371
Yes.
787
01:26:13,377 --> 01:26:16,922
Dear, Futoshi's bride is here.
788
01:26:18,549 --> 01:26:20,801
We'll have the wedding today.
789
01:26:20,885 --> 01:26:23,554
I'll go over to the neighbor's.
790
01:26:34,398 --> 01:26:36,567
I don't see any houses around.
791
01:28:21,547 --> 01:28:23,007
Is this the bath?
792
01:28:24,383 --> 01:28:25,843
There are no walls.
793
01:28:25,968 --> 01:28:27,428
No one will see.
794
01:28:27,553 --> 01:28:28,929
I can't bathe here.
795
01:28:29,054 --> 01:28:29,680
Get in.
796
01:28:29,888 --> 01:28:31,181
No way.
797
01:28:31,348 --> 01:28:32,182
I won't.
798
01:28:32,349 --> 01:28:33,559
It feels good.
799
01:28:33,684 --> 01:28:36,687
I can be seen from any direction.
800
01:28:38,564 --> 01:28:39,523
Get in.
801
01:28:42,026 --> 01:28:43,861
Wow. It feels good.
802
01:28:44,069 --> 01:28:45,279
Told you.
803
01:28:48,240 --> 01:28:49,533
What's with this light?
804
01:28:50,659 --> 01:28:51,952
It just came on.
805
01:29:21,732 --> 01:29:23,150
Say, Mom…
806
01:29:24,234 --> 01:29:26,070
Why are you wearing those?
807
01:29:26,945 --> 01:29:28,238
Because they were there.
808
01:29:29,406 --> 01:29:32,409
I'm sick and tired of this work.
809
01:29:33,869 --> 01:29:35,913
Let's run away tonight.
810
01:29:36,413 --> 01:29:37,581
How?
811
01:29:38,499 --> 01:29:40,834
When he's taking a bath.
812
01:29:41,126 --> 01:29:42,920
It'll work, if he's not around.
813
01:29:51,053 --> 01:29:52,888
There he is.
814
01:29:52,971 --> 01:29:54,348
In the tub.
815
01:29:57,267 --> 01:29:58,268
Mom…
816
01:29:58,685 --> 01:30:01,105
Why is he in a school uniform?
817
01:30:01,438 --> 01:30:02,773
Because he's stupid.
818
01:30:02,940 --> 01:30:04,775
He's so weird.
819
01:30:05,067 --> 01:30:08,112
Don't worry.
We can hit him with firewood.
820
01:30:19,748 --> 01:30:21,291
Put in more firewood.
821
01:30:21,458 --> 01:30:22,459
Cook him.
822
01:30:32,177 --> 01:30:33,137
This is bad.
823
01:30:33,262 --> 01:30:34,138
Run.
824
01:30:34,513 --> 01:30:35,389
Run.
825
01:31:25,522 --> 01:31:26,690
What was that?
826
01:31:27,399 --> 01:31:29,359
The Terminator.
827
01:31:40,245 --> 01:31:42,873
Do you know who I am?
828
01:31:43,081 --> 01:31:45,209
I am Professor Ide.
829
01:31:45,417 --> 01:31:48,045
I am so funny.
830
01:31:48,170 --> 01:31:50,631
What?
Your woman ran off?
831
01:31:51,048 --> 01:31:53,842
So let's go after her.
832
01:31:54,134 --> 01:31:55,886
I have a rocket.
833
01:31:56,637 --> 01:31:57,721
Come this way.
834
01:32:03,936 --> 01:32:05,062
Now, in high spirits!
835
01:32:05,229 --> 01:32:07,189
One, two, three, four.
836
01:32:14,363 --> 01:32:18,408
ROCKET LAUNCH SITE
837
01:32:22,746 --> 01:32:24,373
All halt!
838
01:32:24,498 --> 01:32:25,707
One, two.
839
01:32:26,208 --> 01:32:27,209
Look at it.
840
01:32:27,334 --> 01:32:29,586
It's great. It's great. It's great.
841
01:32:32,047 --> 01:32:34,758
It's going to fly, fly, fly.
842
01:32:35,592 --> 01:32:38,262
10 seconds to launch.
843
01:32:38,428 --> 01:32:40,430
Nine, eight…
844
01:32:40,722 --> 01:32:43,392
Oh, I forgot to close the door.
845
01:32:46,770 --> 01:32:48,230
Once again.
846
01:32:49,022 --> 01:32:50,899
Five seconds to launch.
847
01:32:51,024 --> 01:32:52,943
Four, three,
848
01:32:53,068 --> 01:32:54,611
two, one.
849
01:32:54,736 --> 01:32:55,779
Blast off!
850
01:33:12,588 --> 01:33:16,842
I am an alien from outer space.
851
01:33:20,596 --> 01:33:22,973
Takeshi, remember this?
852
01:33:23,098 --> 01:33:26,810
It's been eight years since KIKUJIRO.
853
01:33:26,977 --> 01:33:29,938
I am an alien from outer space.
854
01:33:31,398 --> 01:33:33,317
Sorry. Once again.
855
01:33:33,442 --> 01:33:35,444
OK. Let's fly.
856
01:33:35,902 --> 01:33:38,989
Three, two, one.
857
01:33:39,239 --> 01:33:41,491
Blast off!
858
01:33:57,591 --> 01:33:59,968
Something fell over there.
859
01:34:00,093 --> 01:34:01,136
What was it?
860
01:34:01,678 --> 01:34:03,805
Who cares what fell?
861
01:34:03,930 --> 01:34:05,515
Why are you wearing my clothes?
862
01:34:07,100 --> 01:34:09,019
You're wearing mine, too.
863
01:34:09,770 --> 01:34:11,813
Couldn't you tell?
864
01:34:12,648 --> 01:34:16,193
Look at you.
You've even got a ribbon on.
865
01:34:35,420 --> 01:34:37,381
I am Professor Ide.
866
01:34:38,340 --> 01:34:41,218
Attempting to escape is futile.
867
01:34:42,886 --> 01:34:43,845
Torpedo.
868
01:34:44,388 --> 01:34:46,139
Fire!
869
01:34:56,191 --> 01:34:59,152
Submerge.
870
01:35:22,175 --> 01:35:24,052
That sign seems to be following us.
871
01:35:24,428 --> 01:35:26,763
DAIKOKU FINANCE
872
01:35:26,888 --> 01:35:28,765
I am Professor Ide.
873
01:35:44,030 --> 01:35:45,073
Hurry, hurry.
874
01:35:45,198 --> 01:35:46,783
Taxi. Taxi.
875
01:36:01,965 --> 01:36:03,592
I am Professor Ide.
876
01:36:05,051 --> 01:36:06,470
Driver, step on it.
877
01:36:07,095 --> 01:36:08,472
To the police station!
878
01:36:09,973 --> 01:36:10,766
Hurry.
879
01:36:10,891 --> 01:36:12,642
To the police station!
880
01:36:16,313 --> 01:36:19,816
We found them.
We're pursuing them now.
881
01:36:19,983 --> 01:36:21,485
Put your mind at ease.
882
01:36:23,987 --> 01:36:25,989
How's it kicking, Kichijoji?
883
01:36:26,114 --> 01:36:27,491
I am kicking.
884
01:36:27,616 --> 01:36:30,494
If we are kicking,
we will catch them soon.
885
01:36:30,702 --> 01:36:32,162
Please enjoy the ride.
886
01:36:32,454 --> 01:36:34,623
Let's do the usual.
Please repeat after me.
887
01:36:34,748 --> 01:36:35,957
Let's kick it!
888
01:36:36,082 --> 01:36:40,837
One, two, three, d-a-a-a-h!
889
01:36:40,962 --> 01:36:42,005
Thank you.
890
01:36:58,605 --> 01:36:59,481
Hurry. Help!
891
01:36:59,606 --> 01:37:01,024
Help!
892
01:37:06,112 --> 01:37:08,990
Now, let's take the field.
893
01:37:12,452 --> 01:37:16,373
Advance!
Kill them all.
894
01:37:17,290 --> 01:37:18,542
What is it?
895
01:37:18,667 --> 01:37:19,501
Over there.
896
01:37:19,626 --> 01:37:20,710
That?
897
01:37:20,877 --> 01:37:23,380
Good boy.
898
01:37:29,886 --> 01:37:30,929
Rocket Punch.
899
01:37:31,304 --> 01:37:33,181
Prepare to attack.
900
01:37:36,893 --> 01:37:37,686
Ready.
901
01:37:39,980 --> 01:37:41,648
Fire!
902
01:37:49,906 --> 01:37:51,199
Don't mind.
903
01:37:56,580 --> 01:37:58,373
It's ready.
904
01:38:13,597 --> 01:38:16,141
That should do it.
905
01:38:16,266 --> 01:38:16,933
LEFT ARM
906
01:38:17,267 --> 01:38:18,059
Ouch.
907
01:38:18,184 --> 01:38:19,227
Ouch.
908
01:38:59,893 --> 01:39:01,519
I want to be with him.
909
01:39:01,645 --> 01:39:02,604
What?
910
01:39:03,605 --> 01:39:05,148
Do you really mean that?
911
01:39:06,483 --> 01:39:07,817
Yes, I do.
912
01:39:14,282 --> 01:39:15,617
It's beautiful.
913
01:39:16,785 --> 01:39:20,622
Maybe, people need a life like this.
914
01:39:30,840 --> 01:39:32,133
A shooting star?
915
01:41:27,582 --> 01:41:29,584
Doctor, how's my brain?
916
01:41:32,295 --> 01:41:33,630
Broken.
917
01:41:43,264 --> 01:41:47,268
Beat Takeshi
918
01:41:48,770 --> 01:41:52,774
Tohru EMORI
919
01:41:53,775 --> 01:41:57,779
Kayoko KISHIMOTO
920
01:42:01,616 --> 01:42:05,620
Anne SUZUKI
921
01:42:06,996 --> 01:42:11,000
Kazuko YOSHIYUKI
922
01:42:12,418 --> 01:42:16,464
Narrator:
Masatoh IBU
923
01:44:04,197 --> 01:44:08,201
Subtitles:
Jeanette AMANO, Richard LORMAND