1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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2
00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:38,676
Mr. Orton?

3
00:01:41,482 --> 00:01:43,039
Mr. Halliwell?

4
00:01:45,450 --> 00:01:46,576
Hello?

5
00:02:17,329 --> 00:02:21,057
Dear, oh, dear. Somebody here
has been playing silly buggers.

6
00:02:59,610 --> 00:03:02,839
You look ill.
They have some brandy in the kitchen.

7
00:03:30,921 --> 00:03:32,819
I won't keep you a moment.

8
00:03:54,929 --> 00:03:58,260
- I can't find his diaries.
- You can't find them?

9
00:03:58,496 --> 00:04:01,020
- It's 20 years ago.
- But they'd be so valuable.

10
00:04:01,098 --> 00:04:03,224
Yes, I don't like to think
what they'd be worth.

11
00:04:03,299 --> 00:04:04,890
For a biographer.

12
00:04:05,132 --> 00:04:07,032
Tess is so disorganized.

13
00:04:14,203 --> 00:04:16,032
- Oh, dear.
- Don't worry.

14
00:04:16,103 --> 00:04:18,162
I can't stand those things.

15
00:04:18,471 --> 00:04:21,597
Every little word.
One can't possibly be natural.

16
00:04:21,972 --> 00:04:23,803
- Is it on?
- Yes.

17
00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:27,173
I knew nothing at all about him
the first time he walked in.

18
00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:30,834
When was that? My God, 1964.

19
00:04:31,710 --> 00:04:35,108
He had considerable confidence and charm.

20
00:04:35,777 --> 00:04:38,869
It was his first play, a radio thing.
I thought it was derivative.

21
00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:40,309
I told him so. He didn't mind.

22
00:04:40,679 --> 00:04:41,805
<i>I thought it was derivative.</i>

23
00:04:41,879 --> 00:04:43,937
<i>I told him so. He didn't mind.</i>

24
00:04:44,014 --> 00:04:46,537
<i>Not Joe. "I'll try and write
you a better one," he said.</i>

25
00:04:46,615 --> 00:04:49,276
<i>I said, "Well, that would be gorgeous. "</i>

26
00:04:50,315 --> 00:04:51,839
<i>As he was leaving...</i>

27
00:04:52,516 --> 00:04:54,813
he said, "Next time, can
I bring my friend?"

28
00:04:54,883 --> 00:04:57,281
And I thought, does he mean "friend"?

29
00:04:57,753 --> 00:05:00,684
Then I thought, yes, he
does mean "friend. "

30
00:05:01,053 --> 00:05:03,451
Which was quite bold in those days.

31
00:05:04,455 --> 00:05:06,921
It was the Dark Ages. Men and men.

32
00:05:07,254 --> 00:05:09,721
And they could still put
you in prison for it.

33
00:05:10,156 --> 00:05:11,850
<i>And they did, dear.</i>

34
00:05:16,825 --> 00:05:18,224
Bollock naked?

35
00:05:18,393 --> 00:05:20,858
No, keep your socks on.

36
00:05:27,529 --> 00:05:30,552
<i>London was still quite exciting then.
Remember that?</i>

37
00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:32,063
<i>No, you wouldn't.</i>

38
00:05:32,431 --> 00:05:34,794
<i>- This is when?
- 1967.</i>

39
00:05:37,566 --> 00:05:40,295
- You're in good shape.
- It's the weights.

40
00:05:40,400 --> 00:05:42,629
When I die, I want people to say:

41
00:05:42,701 --> 00:05:46,396
"He was the most perfectly developed
playwright of his day. "

42
00:05:46,636 --> 00:05:48,603
<i>Joe was having a wonderful time.</i>

43
00:05:48,669 --> 00:05:51,262
<i>His second play, Loot, was a smash hit.</i>

44
00:05:51,404 --> 00:05:54,565
<i>- So he was making lots of money?
- Oh, yes, dear.</i>

45
00:05:54,839 --> 00:05:57,169
<i>Offers to do this and write that.</i>

46
00:05:57,641 --> 00:06:00,301
<i>And he had six months to live.</i>

47
00:06:09,744 --> 00:06:11,108
Is that it?

48
00:06:12,544 --> 00:06:14,205
Is that my present?

49
00:06:15,079 --> 00:06:18,308
- It is terrible, darling.
- It was 14 quid.

50
00:06:21,915 --> 00:06:24,675
I thought you said splash out.

51
00:06:24,750 --> 00:06:27,674
Cheap clothes suit me.
They always have.

52
00:06:27,750 --> 00:06:29,546
It's because I'm from the gutter.

53
00:06:29,617 --> 00:06:32,209
- A contract from New Zealand.
- New Zealand?

54
00:06:32,285 --> 00:06:35,217
I know, but we won't
think about it, dear.

55
00:06:35,619 --> 00:06:39,882
Am I right in thinking we're still
interested in writing the Beatles script?

56
00:06:39,954 --> 00:06:41,148
Oh, yes.

57
00:06:41,455 --> 00:06:44,513
Why don't I call Brian now
and set up a meeting?

58
00:06:45,024 --> 00:06:46,614
Smashing.

59
00:06:48,891 --> 00:06:50,358
Is it "Epstein"...

60
00:06:51,325 --> 00:06:52,656
or "Epstine"?

61
00:06:56,827 --> 00:06:58,225
Better wait.

62
00:06:59,061 --> 00:07:02,061
Americans are so sensitive
about their names.

63
00:07:02,497 --> 00:07:04,087
He's not American, is he?

64
00:07:04,164 --> 00:07:06,555
Well, he moves in that world.

65
00:07:07,098 --> 00:07:09,122
We'll see each other later?

66
00:07:09,199 --> 00:07:10,766
I hope people come.

67
00:07:10,834 --> 00:07:13,456
They will. I put out a three-line whip.

68
00:07:13,533 --> 00:07:15,429
- Thank you.
- How is he?

69
00:07:15,835 --> 00:07:17,364
He's fine.

70
00:07:36,574 --> 00:07:37,666
Well?

71
00:07:38,443 --> 00:07:40,172
It's 5 o'clock.

72
00:07:40,976 --> 00:07:42,643
It's a quarter past 5.

73
00:07:43,678 --> 00:07:46,368
It's only £14.
Peggy hates it.

74
00:07:46,512 --> 00:07:48,778
- That's where you've been.
- She likes you.

75
00:07:48,847 --> 00:07:51,272
Peggy's one of your few fans.

76
00:07:51,814 --> 00:07:54,378
- Any calls?
- I've been worried stiff.

77
00:07:54,481 --> 00:07:56,439
Why?
It doesn't start till 9:00.

78
00:07:56,516 --> 00:07:59,642
The whole point about irrational
behavior is that it is irrational.

79
00:07:59,717 --> 00:08:02,941
I don't worry about any thing.
I just worry.

80
00:08:08,452 --> 00:08:12,051
- Stop that.
- And you stop being such a bilious queen.

81
00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:13,916
I've to be there by 8:00
to check the arrangements.

82
00:08:13,987 --> 00:08:17,350
- I'm frightened nobody will come.
- They'll come.

83
00:08:17,589 --> 00:08:19,647
"And what sort of day
have you had, Kenneth?"

84
00:08:21,291 --> 00:08:25,084
Well, not unproductive, Joe, actually.
I caught up on a big backlog of dusting.

85
00:08:25,159 --> 00:08:28,149
Then I slipped down the road
to replenish our stock of corn flakes.

86
00:08:28,227 --> 00:08:31,588
When I returned, I rinsed a selection
of your soiled underclothes...

87
00:08:31,661 --> 00:08:34,956
by which time it was 4:00,
the hour of your scheduled return.

88
00:08:35,029 --> 00:08:38,256
When you failed to appear, I redeemed
the shining hour by cutting my toenails.

89
00:08:38,331 --> 00:08:41,459
What did you expect me to do?
Shag the Dimplex?

90
00:08:41,532 --> 00:08:43,623
You can still be quite funny.

91
00:08:44,199 --> 00:08:45,187
Still.

92
00:08:48,267 --> 00:08:50,166
Have you been reading my diary?

93
00:08:50,234 --> 00:08:51,894
- No.
- Why not?

94
00:08:52,435 --> 00:08:53,595
I would.

95
00:09:16,377 --> 00:09:19,935
<i>- They lived in Islington.
- Isn't that quite fashionable?</i>

96
00:09:20,578 --> 00:09:22,011
<i>Not then, dear.</i>

97
00:09:22,612 --> 00:09:23,976
<i>An apartment?</i>

98
00:09:25,214 --> 00:09:28,007
<i>Hardly. It was a cupboard.</i>

99
00:09:29,048 --> 00:09:30,344
All right?

100
00:09:30,915 --> 00:09:32,109
Smashing.

101
00:10:10,203 --> 00:10:14,154
- Can we go past the theater?
- Oh, no, I knew you'd say that. I knew.

102
00:10:14,222 --> 00:10:16,094
This is supposed to be my night!

103
00:10:16,163 --> 00:10:19,167
Actually, I just want to get out
of this fucking room.

104
00:10:19,245 --> 00:10:22,384
- I'd better have my Valium now.
- Give us a couple.

105
00:10:27,883 --> 00:10:30,418
Name in the paper again last night.

106
00:10:31,333 --> 00:10:34,803
Mrs. Sugden says
you're halfway to being a household word.

107
00:10:35,686 --> 00:10:37,353
Kenneth looks smart.

108
00:10:37,761 --> 00:10:40,102
Don't look at me. I'm not washed.

109
00:10:44,927 --> 00:10:46,663
Going out to supper.

110
00:10:47,707 --> 00:10:49,511
Candle-lit, probably.

111
00:10:50,621 --> 00:10:52,961
It's one function after another.

112
00:10:53,835 --> 00:10:56,072
They've got the world at their feet.

113
00:11:13,358 --> 00:11:17,068
When I was hanging them,
I kept thinking Schwitters.

114
00:11:17,077 --> 00:11:18,208
Wrong?

115
00:11:18,451 --> 00:11:21,299
Not entirely. You see,
when I first started...

116
00:11:21,369 --> 00:11:23,484
It would be
in a cellar.

117
00:11:23,497 --> 00:11:25,622
Shut up. This is our
be-kind-to-Kenny day.

118
00:11:25,695 --> 00:11:28,069
- Oh the avalanche begins.
- We came together.

119
00:11:28,144 --> 00:11:30,048
Always the best way.

120
00:11:31,932 --> 00:11:34,539
- Hello.
- Well, Kenneth, your big day.

121
00:11:34,682 --> 00:11:37,792
- Now Joe, how are you?
- Where are these pictures?

122
00:11:39,175 --> 00:11:42,354
- Nice of you to come.
- We girls must stick together.

123
00:11:42,494 --> 00:11:44,941
I had a friend once in soft furnishings.

124
00:11:45,278 --> 00:11:49,028
The number of times I trailed
around the Ideal Home Exhibition...

125
00:11:49,102 --> 00:11:52,052
I've had an invitation
to the Lord Mayor of London.

126
00:11:52,119 --> 00:11:54,663
It's a banquet for those
eminent in the arts and sciences.

127
00:11:54,736 --> 00:11:55,598
Sounds exciting.

128
00:11:55,676 --> 00:11:57,782
<i>It's because I've sold
the film rights to Loot.</i>

129
00:11:57,859 --> 00:12:00,708
I'm as rich as them,
so I'm invited to their rubbishy dinner.

130
00:12:00,780 --> 00:12:04,604
Now Joe, I believe they give you
some excellent turtle soup.

131
00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:06,612
Who's paying for all this?

132
00:12:06,689 --> 00:12:09,137
Success! Our first sale.

133
00:12:10,482 --> 00:12:12,589
<i>Peggy's bought my Cat Screen.</i>

134
00:12:13,738 --> 00:12:15,777
And I've almost sold another.

135
00:12:16,358 --> 00:12:18,935
- You've no need to.
- I like it.

136
00:12:20,083 --> 00:12:23,667
And you've no need to, either.
You don't owe him anything.

137
00:12:23,742 --> 00:12:25,918
Not anymore.

138
00:12:26,632 --> 00:12:29,311
You must leave him, Joe.
You've got to.

139
00:12:29,652 --> 00:12:30,855
I can't.

140
00:12:31,399 --> 00:12:32,841
No, I couldn't.

141
00:12:33,044 --> 00:12:35,288
<i>And was he going to leave him?</i>

142
00:12:35,630 --> 00:12:37,574
<i>No shortage of offers.</i>

143
00:12:38,887 --> 00:12:40,294
<i>I don't know.</i>

144
00:12:40,599 --> 00:12:42,543
<i>Could he have left him?</i>

145
00:12:42,715 --> 00:12:45,197
<i>You're married. How can you tell?</i>

146
00:12:46,172 --> 00:12:47,911
What for? Sex?

147
00:12:48,656 --> 00:12:51,541
I suppose that's where they learnt it.
Therapy.

148
00:12:53,659 --> 00:12:56,108
- And what do you do?
- I'm the artist.

149
00:12:56,178 --> 00:12:57,448
Oh, really?

150
00:12:57,957 --> 00:13:00,739
Well, they're very unusual.

151
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:06,010
Seems to be going well.

152
00:13:06,081 --> 00:13:07,684
Have we sold any more?

153
00:13:07,759 --> 00:13:10,473
No, but I'm getting lots of enthusiasm.

154
00:13:22,097 --> 00:13:24,741
- Isn't that Joe Orton?
- Yes.

155
00:13:24,882 --> 00:13:27,264
<i>I loved Loot!</i>

156
00:13:27,573 --> 00:13:30,080
The title was mine, actually.

157
00:13:30,188 --> 00:13:32,832
I gave him all his titles.
I'm his personal assistant.

158
00:13:32,908 --> 00:13:34,010
Really?

159
00:13:34,017 --> 00:13:36,932
I don't care for these at all.

160
00:13:37,007 --> 00:13:38,783
And what does that entail?

161
00:13:38,853 --> 00:13:42,681
It entails washing his underwear. It
entails taking his jumpers to Sketchley's.

162
00:13:42,751 --> 00:13:44,894
It entails poaching his fucking eggs.

163
00:13:44,972 --> 00:13:46,886
And it entails reading his manuscripts...

164
00:13:46,954 --> 00:13:49,741
only to find everything I've
thought or said is included.

165
00:13:49,812 --> 00:13:51,955
That must be very rewarding.

166
00:13:52,031 --> 00:13:55,288
If you're referring to the occasional bout
of mutual masturbation...

167
00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:57,608
no, it is not rewarding at all!

168
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:02,144
<i>I really do love my Screen.</i>

169
00:14:02,623 --> 00:14:04,096
Honestly?

170
00:14:09,279 --> 00:14:10,720
"How do you justify your existence?"

171
00:14:10,797 --> 00:14:14,783
"I'm Joe Orton's friend. "
As if it's a profession.

172
00:14:15,201 --> 00:14:17,153
Well, it's not a profession.

173
00:14:19,514 --> 00:14:21,765
It's a fucking full-time job.

174
00:14:22,107 --> 00:14:23,958
It's not a profession.

175
00:14:56,648 --> 00:14:58,292
<i>Was this customary?</i>

176
00:14:58,369 --> 00:15:02,512
<i>Oh, yes. According to the diary,
practically a daily occurrence.</i>

177
00:15:03,396 --> 00:15:05,281
<i>But you lost his diary.</i>

178
00:15:06,062 --> 00:15:07,062
<i>Yes.</i>

179
00:15:46,291 --> 00:15:48,222
No, I haven't seen him.

180
00:15:48,297 --> 00:15:50,355
I thought he left with you.

181
00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:57,239
No, Kenneth, of course I wanted it.
I wouldn't have bought it if I hadn't.

182
00:15:57,666 --> 00:16:00,675
I shall have it here, in my office.

183
00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:04,420
Yes, if he rings, I'll tell him.

184
00:16:04,963 --> 00:16:06,058
Bye.

185
00:16:11,279 --> 00:16:12,683
Then what?

186
00:16:13,516 --> 00:16:15,403
Then he did the same for me.

187
00:16:15,478 --> 00:16:16,882
Shall we eat? I'm starving.

188
00:16:16,953 --> 00:16:20,549
I write it all down, all the sex.
It's all in my diaries.

189
00:16:21,492 --> 00:16:23,753
How did he know you were here?

190
00:16:25,064 --> 00:16:26,987
You do, don't you?

191
00:16:27,033 --> 00:16:28,811
In that state.

192
00:16:29,514 --> 00:16:31,788
You know everything.

193
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:41,553
Sorry.

194
00:16:43,498 --> 00:16:44,439
I'm sorry.

195
00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:47,255
I brought the melon.

196
00:16:53,096 --> 00:16:54,424
Any calls?

197
00:16:57,423 --> 00:16:58,647
I'm sorry.

198
00:17:01,881 --> 00:17:02,971
Shit!

199
00:17:09,268 --> 00:17:10,629
You found us.

200
00:17:11,565 --> 00:17:13,356
I just got here myself.

201
00:17:13,462 --> 00:17:16,183
This is my wife, Anthea. Ms. Ramsay.

202
00:17:16,655 --> 00:17:18,543
I think it is perhaps Peggy.

203
00:17:19,605 --> 00:17:20,979
We're working on the book together.

204
00:17:21,050 --> 00:17:23,515
Why don't you get Ms. Ramsay a drink?
White wine?

205
00:17:23,582 --> 00:17:25,774
White wine. You're not American.

206
00:17:26,581 --> 00:17:27,808
No, he is.

207
00:17:28,183 --> 00:17:30,478
John's American. He is, I'm not.

208
00:17:31,083 --> 00:17:34,675
Yes, I think I have
just about got that straight.

209
00:17:36,250 --> 00:17:38,716
We're working on the book together.

210
00:17:45,517 --> 00:17:47,505
These are the diaries.

211
00:17:49,716 --> 00:17:52,149
You must guard them with your life.

212
00:17:52,950 --> 00:17:54,280
Believe me.

213
00:17:54,717 --> 00:17:56,046
We can eat.

214
00:18:01,550 --> 00:18:03,778
Urinals figure largely, of course.

215
00:18:05,917 --> 00:18:07,042
Sugar?

216
00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:11,427
The more insalubrious the circumstances,
the more Joe seemed to enjoy it.

217
00:18:11,833 --> 00:18:12,925
Ginger?

218
00:18:13,001 --> 00:18:15,762
His first taste of sex,
or the first that he records...

219
00:18:15,834 --> 00:18:19,597
took place in a cinema lavatory
in Leicester at the age of 14.

220
00:18:20,136 --> 00:18:22,499
<i>The film was My Favorite Brunette.</i>

221
00:18:23,035 --> 00:18:25,092
Bob Hope and Dorothy Lamour.

222
00:18:26,135 --> 00:18:27,225
Quite.

223
00:18:28,301 --> 00:18:31,130
Joe says he came
all down the man's raincoat.

224
00:18:32,301 --> 00:18:33,665
Lovely melon.

225
00:18:34,701 --> 00:18:35,793
Thanks.

226
00:18:38,835 --> 00:18:43,494
I'll set Anthea to work transcribing these,
and then you can have the originals back.

227
00:18:43,568 --> 00:18:44,966
Do you type?

228
00:18:45,702 --> 00:18:49,395
It's tiresome, but sometime
we are going to have to talk about a fee.

229
00:18:49,468 --> 00:18:52,628
- I do have Joe's relatives to think about.
- Of course.

230
00:18:53,037 --> 00:18:54,593
He's all they have.

231
00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:58,457
What is this?

232
00:18:58,834 --> 00:19:02,790
This is the film script he was writing
for the Beatles that final summer.

233
00:19:03,169 --> 00:19:04,500
Darling Joe.

234
00:19:06,235 --> 00:19:08,827
I'm about to get Brian
Epstein on the phone.

235
00:19:08,902 --> 00:19:11,425
When do you think
we could set up a meeting?

236
00:19:11,502 --> 00:19:13,993
Not there, Ms. Ramsay. On the Coast.

237
00:19:16,037 --> 00:19:19,799
When you say he's on the Coast, dear,
do you mean he's in Brighton?

238
00:19:22,203 --> 00:19:24,998
When he gets back
and has shaken the sand out of his shoes...

239
00:19:25,070 --> 00:19:27,332
perhaps you could get him to call me.

240
00:19:27,904 --> 00:19:29,029
Slut.

241
00:19:29,537 --> 00:19:30,594
Joe, dear.

242
00:19:31,004 --> 00:19:33,730
I've started on the script for the Beatles.

243
00:19:33,803 --> 00:19:36,736
I'm using some of a novel
I wrote years ago.

244
00:19:37,137 --> 00:19:39,070
I'm surprised how good it is.

245
00:19:39,138 --> 00:19:41,502
You didn't write that. We wrote it.

246
00:19:41,704 --> 00:19:45,001
So what were you planning on doing?
Selling it to Warner Brothers?

247
00:19:45,239 --> 00:19:47,727
I wouldn't care, if you
gave me some credit.

248
00:19:47,804 --> 00:19:50,430
If you only told people I helped you.

249
00:19:51,904 --> 00:19:55,462
- Tell the Beatles I help you.
- You're not being much help now.

250
00:19:55,538 --> 00:19:57,970
- Have you nothing to do?
- You do it!

251
00:19:58,039 --> 00:20:02,028
Try a spot of post-coital dusting yourself.
It always has to be me.

252
00:20:02,104 --> 00:20:03,468
Who's this?

253
00:20:04,404 --> 00:20:06,871
It's the police. It's one of your pickups.

254
00:20:07,005 --> 00:20:10,868
Your sex life has caught up with you.
Now you're going to have to pay.

255
00:20:18,439 --> 00:20:21,461
I thought you might like
a preview of my frock.

256
00:20:22,239 --> 00:20:26,432
It's for the firm's annual get-together
in a month or two's time.

257
00:20:28,674 --> 00:20:31,036
The actual venue is not definite yet...

258
00:20:31,172 --> 00:20:34,536
but it's thought to be
one of the leading London hotels.

259
00:20:35,873 --> 00:20:38,634
There's been some dispute
about the design.

260
00:20:38,706 --> 00:20:41,798
It's a floral motif,
obviously, all hand-done.

261
00:20:42,139 --> 00:20:44,299
Only, I say these are roses.

262
00:20:44,773 --> 00:20:47,296
And Mr. Sugden will insist they're peonies.

263
00:20:48,241 --> 00:20:50,069
This could be a lily.

264
00:20:50,674 --> 00:20:54,129
- Looks more of a rhododendron to me.
- That's a thought.

265
00:20:54,573 --> 00:20:56,802
I'll go try that one out on Clifford.

266
00:20:58,674 --> 00:21:02,436
Do you notice I'm limping?
Spilled a hot drink down my dress.

267
00:21:02,907 --> 00:21:05,339
My vagina came up like a football.

268
00:21:25,441 --> 00:21:27,430
If you were successful...

269
00:21:27,942 --> 00:21:31,067
so successful
that you couldn't walk down the street...

270
00:21:31,142 --> 00:21:34,233
what would you do?
I'm thinking of the Beatles.

271
00:21:35,508 --> 00:21:37,066
I'd have a home.

272
00:21:39,408 --> 00:21:42,340
In the country. With servants.

273
00:21:43,374 --> 00:21:44,773
I wouldn't.

274
00:21:45,542 --> 00:21:47,973
I'd just shag everything in sight.

275
00:21:53,442 --> 00:21:54,431
No.

276
00:21:56,943 --> 00:21:58,307
Have a wank.

277
00:22:03,809 --> 00:22:05,934
I can't just have a wank.

278
00:22:06,576 --> 00:22:09,338
I need three days' notice to have a wank!

279
00:22:13,076 --> 00:22:15,202
You can just stand there and do it.

280
00:22:15,277 --> 00:22:17,571
Me, it's like organizing D-day.

281
00:22:18,009 --> 00:22:20,567
Forces have to be assembled,
magazines bought...

282
00:22:20,643 --> 00:22:23,507
the past dredged
for some suitably unsavory episode...

283
00:22:23,576 --> 00:22:27,600
the dogged thought of which can still
produce a faint flicker of desire.

284
00:22:27,677 --> 00:22:29,143
"Have a wank. "

285
00:22:30,077 --> 00:22:32,475
<i>It’d be easier to raise the Titanic.</i>

286
00:22:32,544 --> 00:22:35,374
- And don't write it down.
- It's only my diary.

287
00:22:36,644 --> 00:22:39,768
- Do you read it?
- I've told you, no.

288
00:22:40,344 --> 00:22:44,072
My mom did. I used to have to put
the dirty bits in shorthand.

289
00:22:44,810 --> 00:22:47,039
Only time it's been of any use.

290
00:22:50,910 --> 00:22:52,604
I'm sorry, I can't help you.

291
00:22:52,678 --> 00:22:55,906
My secretary does shorthand,
but I'm on my own here.

292
00:23:00,244 --> 00:23:03,076
Well, dear,
you'll just have to use your imagination.

293
00:23:09,645 --> 00:23:12,236
Mother, didn't you once do shorthand?

294
00:23:12,779 --> 00:23:14,711
Yes, for about five minutes.

295
00:23:14,779 --> 00:23:16,802
It's this playwright John's working on.

296
00:23:16,879 --> 00:23:19,640
He went to secretarial school as a boy
and took shorthand.

297
00:23:19,712 --> 00:23:21,372
This is his diary.

298
00:23:21,579 --> 00:23:24,273
He keeps going into shorthand, you see.

299
00:23:26,125 --> 00:23:29,079
It was a long time ago, dear.
I never got the diploma.

300
00:23:29,085 --> 00:23:32,940
"Woke up late. Did not go to school.
Told Mom I felt sick.

301
00:23:32,975 --> 00:23:36,094
<i>"When she'd gone to work,
I listened to Housewives' Choice. "</i>

302
00:23:36,179 --> 00:23:38,904
"Then went into Mom's bedroom...

303
00:23:38,939 --> 00:23:42,107
"and arranged the dressing table mirrors...

304
00:23:42,142 --> 00:23:45,054
"and had a lovely, long, slow...

305
00:23:45,089 --> 00:23:46,705
"wink. "

306
00:23:46,740 --> 00:23:49,506
"Wink. " You sure that's an "i"?

307
00:23:49,541 --> 00:23:51,880
No, dear, I'm not sure at all.

308
00:23:58,296 --> 00:24:00,349
"Read all morning...

309
00:24:00,792 --> 00:24:02,846
"but got another hard-on.

310
00:24:04,054 --> 00:24:07,845
"Just putting soap on it when Mom came in.

311
00:24:08,116 --> 00:24:11,373
"Said I thought I had a spot coming.

312
00:24:12,310 --> 00:24:15,703
"Mom quiet all through meal. "
I should think so.

313
00:24:16,272 --> 00:24:17,462
Does he go on like this?

314
00:24:17,536 --> 00:24:21,054
No, the early ones stopped
just when his life got interesting.

315
00:24:21,130 --> 00:24:23,423
Sounds quite interesting already.

316
00:24:23,528 --> 00:24:26,956
- Where's John?
- He's gone to Leicester to see the sister.

317
00:24:27,156 --> 00:24:30,118
<i>To look at the house
where Joe was brought up.</i>

318
00:24:39,638 --> 00:24:40,761
Hello.

319
00:24:41,169 --> 00:24:43,223
Was this the Orton house?

320
00:24:46,063 --> 00:24:48,150
Is this the...

321
00:24:49,058 --> 00:24:52,214
- I'm English. Ask me.
- Was this the house that Orton...

322
00:24:52,287 --> 00:24:53,773
<i>I hated that house.</i>

323
00:24:53,918 --> 00:24:56,143
There was no love in it.

324
00:24:56,316 --> 00:24:58,937
No wonder he couldn't wait to get out.

325
00:24:59,046 --> 00:25:02,303
In those days, if you were from Leicester
and wanted to be an actor...

326
00:25:02,375 --> 00:25:04,361
you had to get rid of your accent.

327
00:25:04,478 --> 00:25:06,409
Not that Mom knew anything
about the acting.

328
00:25:06,476 --> 00:25:09,767
<i>- She just wanted John to talk posh.
- You still call him John.</i>

329
00:25:09,838 --> 00:25:14,422
<i>That was his name when we were little.
It was after he was famous, he was Joe.</i>

330
00:25:14,632 --> 00:25:17,185
- Mrs. Lambert?
- Madame Lambert.

331
00:25:20,023 --> 00:25:23,882
- You are anxious to improve your diction?
- Yes, Madame Lambert.

332
00:25:24,284 --> 00:25:26,271
What is your chosen field?

333
00:25:27,115 --> 00:25:29,633
- I want to be an actor.
- Indeed.

334
00:25:30,044 --> 00:25:32,596
Leicester has produced some fine actors.

335
00:25:32,706 --> 00:25:35,793
Leicester is the hometown
of Richard Attenborough.

336
00:25:35,967 --> 00:25:36,955
Tea.

337
00:25:37,134 --> 00:25:40,254
Movement, elocution,
all these I can teach you.

338
00:25:40,329 --> 00:25:42,224
The arts proper to the stage.

339
00:25:42,293 --> 00:25:44,687
How to smoke a cigarette
with poise, elegance...

340
00:25:44,756 --> 00:25:46,810
and, above all, conviction.

341
00:25:46,886 --> 00:25:49,609
The powder compact
as a means of expression.

342
00:25:49,682 --> 00:25:51,373
Go to any production in the West End...

343
00:25:51,447 --> 00:25:54,897
and you will see these arts
brought to a pitch of perfection.

344
00:25:54,975 --> 00:25:58,368
But all that is as nothing...

345
00:25:59,235 --> 00:26:01,857
without the one essential requirement.

346
00:26:02,031 --> 00:26:04,654
- I have the money.
- Money? Pish!

347
00:26:05,161 --> 00:26:08,610
I'm not speaking of money.
I'm speaking of talent.

348
00:26:09,323 --> 00:26:12,545
Judging by what you've read,
you have no talent.

349
00:26:13,082 --> 00:26:14,943
No talent whatsoever.

350
00:26:15,181 --> 00:26:18,041
- I still want to learn.
- Bravo!

351
00:26:18,509 --> 00:26:22,764
No marks for talent.
Full marks for Dunkirk spirit.

352
00:26:31,158 --> 00:26:32,486
Bloody plays.

353
00:26:32,555 --> 00:26:35,018
Mom didn't have much of a horizon.

354
00:26:35,287 --> 00:26:39,372
She'd have liked him a civil servant.
A suit every day of his life.

355
00:26:39,613 --> 00:26:42,768
Next time, tell them
to provide you with a costume!

356
00:26:44,007 --> 00:26:46,935
Using our bedspread. Wicked!

357
00:26:47,368 --> 00:26:48,492
You'll clean it!

358
00:26:50,997 --> 00:26:53,018
Coloring it with distemper.

359
00:26:53,094 --> 00:26:55,183
Ruined, bloody ruined.

360
00:26:55,658 --> 00:26:59,177
I bet Dirk Bogarde
didn't distemper his mother's bedspread!

361
00:27:00,284 --> 00:27:01,578
Bloody disgusting.

362
00:27:08,848 --> 00:27:10,810
And get some clothes on.

363
00:27:11,843 --> 00:27:15,327
Walking around like Sambo.
Don't know where to look.

364
00:27:29,818 --> 00:27:30,907
What?

365
00:27:31,316 --> 00:27:33,608
There's somebody at the door.
Fetch us me teeth.

366
00:27:45,463 --> 00:27:47,858
It'll be the gas man. I never paid.

367
00:27:50,989 --> 00:27:52,475
Good afternoon.

368
00:27:52,819 --> 00:27:55,474
I'm a Council official.
I've come about your lad.

369
00:27:55,548 --> 00:27:58,170
Why? What's he done?
What have you done?

370
00:27:58,245 --> 00:28:01,503
Shakespeare's what he's done.
He's taken a very good part.

371
00:28:01,575 --> 00:28:04,933
He's favorably impressed a prominent
member of the Education Committee.

372
00:28:05,003 --> 00:28:06,829
Yes, he'd have a bedspread.

373
00:28:09,230 --> 00:28:10,626
Good afternoon.

374
00:28:10,695 --> 00:28:12,987
- Who's this?
- This is my husband. Ignore him.

375
00:28:13,058 --> 00:28:16,281
- Your son is a born actor.
- An actor?

376
00:28:16,354 --> 00:28:18,681
But he went to Clark's College.
He's done shorthand.

377
00:28:18,751 --> 00:28:21,906
- He had a badge in his blazer.
- This boy will never make a typist.

378
00:28:21,979 --> 00:28:23,943
- He can do 40 words a minute.
- Shut up!

379
00:28:24,010 --> 00:28:26,097
No, he must take up a dramatic career.

380
00:28:26,173 --> 00:28:30,123
But I've sacrificed all down the line in
order for him to land a job in an office.

381
00:28:30,201 --> 00:28:34,355
No, Mrs. Orton, your son must go in
for a scholarship to RADA.

382
00:28:34,761 --> 00:28:38,211
- RADA?
- The Royal Academy of Dramatic Art.

383
00:28:38,655 --> 00:28:39,745
RADA?

384
00:28:42,018 --> 00:28:44,412
The Royal Academy of Dramatic Art.

385
00:28:45,247 --> 00:28:46,370
RADA.

386
00:28:48,675 --> 00:28:51,229
"Do you know who I'm looking for, Smee?"

387
00:28:51,306 --> 00:28:53,858
"No, tell me again, Captain. "

388
00:28:54,134 --> 00:28:57,186
"I'm looking for a boy, Smee. "

389
00:28:58,628 --> 00:29:00,681
"What kind of boy, Captain?"

390
00:29:01,125 --> 00:29:04,086
"A wicked boy. A heartless boy.

391
00:29:04,186 --> 00:29:07,239
"A boy who never ate his rice pudding. "

392
00:29:07,582 --> 00:29:10,839
"Oh, horror! Can there be such boys?"

393
00:29:11,076 --> 00:29:12,734
"Aye, there can.

394
00:29:12,925 --> 00:29:16,976
"It was a boy like that
that cut off my arm...

395
00:29:17,268 --> 00:29:19,460
"and fed it to the crocodiles.

396
00:29:19,598 --> 00:29:20,892
"His name...

397
00:29:20,963 --> 00:29:23,925
"was Peter Pan. "

398
00:29:35,910 --> 00:29:39,030
You've had some amateur experience,
I gather, Mr. Orton.

399
00:29:39,171 --> 00:29:40,795
Tell us about it.

400
00:29:41,702 --> 00:29:44,129
<i>I started off in Richard III.</i>

401
00:29:44,598 --> 00:29:45,857
As what?

402
00:29:46,661 --> 00:29:48,022
A messenger.

403
00:29:50,355 --> 00:29:53,717
Well. that was most original.
You've done very well.

404
00:29:54,786 --> 00:29:57,013
Yes, very nice and loud.

405
00:30:07,979 --> 00:30:12,171
"Oh, that this too too solid flesh
would melt...

406
00:30:12,344 --> 00:30:15,672
- "thaw and resolve itself into a dew!"
- Rather old.

407
00:30:15,775 --> 00:30:17,360
- "Or that the Everlasting
had not fix'd... "

408
00:30:17,373 --> 00:30:18,968
- Not as old
as he looks.

409
00:30:19,041 --> 00:30:21,438
"... his canon 'gainst self-slaughter!"

410
00:30:23,070 --> 00:30:25,592
It's useful to have
somebody as old as that.

411
00:30:26,069 --> 00:30:27,729
Just for casting.

412
00:30:28,501 --> 00:30:32,057
We seem to be taking
practically anything that stands up.

413
00:30:35,565 --> 00:30:37,053
At least he's got the coat.

414
00:30:45,527 --> 00:30:47,991
- What are you?
- Cats, miss.

415
00:30:49,258 --> 00:30:51,917
Let's change the exercise slightly.

416
00:30:52,623 --> 00:30:54,384
I've got a cat now.

417
00:30:56,088 --> 00:30:58,576
Here you are. Catch it.

418
00:31:49,402 --> 00:31:53,298
Movement, enunciation, breath control.

419
00:31:53,699 --> 00:31:56,460
It's all so wildly dated, don't you agree?

420
00:31:57,497 --> 00:31:59,382
Yes, it is.

421
00:31:59,395 --> 00:32:01,291
Still, I suppose the
beginners find it useful.

422
00:32:01,961 --> 00:32:04,153
- Are you new to London?
- Hardly.

423
00:32:05,359 --> 00:32:08,846
A small legacy enabled me to spend
several weekends at the Strand Palace.

424
00:32:08,924 --> 00:32:12,582
- Hotels are a closed book to me.
- You'll like the Strand Palace.

425
00:32:12,655 --> 00:32:15,086
Perhaps we might venture there one evening
for coffee.

426
00:32:15,154 --> 00:32:16,279
Ready?

427
00:32:16,354 --> 00:32:19,251
We're off over to South Bank. The festival.

428
00:32:19,886 --> 00:32:21,782
Yes, it might be amusing, I suppose.

429
00:32:21,850 --> 00:32:24,975
Yes, the plebs and their simple pleasures.

430
00:32:26,449 --> 00:32:28,470
What did you ask him for?

431
00:32:39,475 --> 00:32:40,701
Come on.

432
00:32:52,834 --> 00:32:54,266
"Let us go then, you and I...

433
00:32:54,335 --> 00:32:56,731
"when the evening is spread out
against the sky...

434
00:32:56,799 --> 00:32:59,490
"like a patient etherised upon a table. "

435
00:33:02,695 --> 00:33:03,957
Come on.

436
00:33:09,159 --> 00:33:11,386
You know, some of these people are...

437
00:33:12,757 --> 00:33:15,518
- having sexual intercourse.
- Fucking, you mean.

438
00:33:15,590 --> 00:33:19,247
What did you expect?
Many of them are from Australia.

439
00:33:21,420 --> 00:33:22,612
Come on.

440
00:33:35,179 --> 00:33:37,439
<i>What was the Festival of Britain?</i>

441
00:33:38,012 --> 00:33:40,202
<i>That was when it
all came off the ration.</i>

442
00:33:40,442 --> 00:33:42,430
<i>You mean food and things?</i>

443
00:33:42,575 --> 00:33:45,473
<i>Life, dear. Sex. Everything.</i>

444
00:33:46,674 --> 00:33:48,400
<i>Only it didn't, of course.</i>

445
00:33:54,801 --> 00:33:58,562
I wish he'd never come.
I wanted it to be just us.

446
00:34:04,330 --> 00:34:05,921
- No.
- Why?

447
00:34:06,113 --> 00:34:09,873
- Not here. People are looking.
- Fuck people.

448
00:34:10,211 --> 00:34:12,233
You can't live like that, John.

449
00:34:12,310 --> 00:34:15,172
- I want to take things gradually.
- I don't.

450
00:34:15,774 --> 00:34:17,796
You don't know what life's like.

451
00:34:17,973 --> 00:34:21,028
I'm not going to find out
at this rate, either.

452
00:35:26,404 --> 00:35:28,891
- Thank you.
- Cheap clothes suit you.

453
00:35:28,969 --> 00:35:31,525
It's because you're from the gutter.

454
00:35:35,931 --> 00:35:38,158
I said I'll move in with Janet.

455
00:35:42,230 --> 00:35:43,887
This is the room.

456
00:35:44,827 --> 00:35:47,986
I'm only looking. I'm fixed up elsewhere.

457
00:35:54,289 --> 00:35:56,584
Is it a northern light?

458
00:35:57,288 --> 00:35:59,151
Never heard any complaints.

459
00:35:59,221 --> 00:36:02,151
Of course, it's in dire need of decorating.

460
00:36:03,218 --> 00:36:04,706
What is that smell?

461
00:36:05,183 --> 00:36:09,114
Air freshener.
The carpet came from Reading originally.

462
00:36:12,105 --> 00:36:13,764
Friends, are you?

463
00:36:14,071 --> 00:36:16,933
- Students.
- I've nothing against friendship.

464
00:36:17,436 --> 00:36:21,195
It's the most wonderful thing in the world,
within reason.

465
00:36:21,466 --> 00:36:23,092
I'm only looking.

466
00:36:23,565 --> 00:36:26,428
- They say Islington's coming up.
- It is.

467
00:36:26,697 --> 00:36:30,957
They've turned the greengrocer's into
an antique shop, and the pub is silent.

468
00:36:31,028 --> 00:36:32,618
What do you think?

469
00:36:33,161 --> 00:36:36,092
I think I shall keep an open mind.

470
00:36:55,748 --> 00:36:57,872
Help yourself. Here.

471
00:37:07,943 --> 00:37:11,896
- Where did you get them?
- I nicked them while he wasn't looking.

472
00:37:20,269 --> 00:37:22,789
- You can type?
- Forty words a minute.

473
00:37:23,500 --> 00:37:25,335
Neither of us seems
to have family photos.

474
00:37:25,348 --> 00:37:27,193
I'm an orphan.

475
00:37:27,399 --> 00:37:29,625
I always wanted to be an orphan.

476
00:37:29,697 --> 00:37:32,219
I could have been
if it hadn't been for my parents.

477
00:37:32,296 --> 00:37:34,558
My mother died when I was a boy.

478
00:37:35,328 --> 00:37:37,952
She was stung on the tongue by a wasp.

479
00:37:38,693 --> 00:37:41,589
One minute we were just
sitting down to breakfast...

480
00:37:41,658 --> 00:37:43,589
ten minutes later, she was dead.

481
00:37:43,657 --> 00:37:45,849
- That still leaves your dad.
- Him?

482
00:37:46,289 --> 00:37:48,913
He put his head in the gas oven
when I was 18.

483
00:37:48,987 --> 00:37:51,475
I came down one morning
and found him lying there.

484
00:37:51,554 --> 00:37:53,347
So I switched the gas off, had a shave...

485
00:37:53,418 --> 00:37:55,906
made some tea, and called the ambulance.
In that order.

486
00:37:55,984 --> 00:37:58,914
I understand.
My dad always took a back seat.

487
00:37:59,515 --> 00:38:00,842
My novels.

488
00:38:01,582 --> 00:38:03,169
Anybody can act.

489
00:38:04,244 --> 00:38:06,301
All these books. I'll never catch up.

490
00:38:06,378 --> 00:38:09,365
I'm a cultivated person, John.
You'll find it rubs off.

491
00:38:09,443 --> 00:38:10,840
Dictionaries.

492
00:38:10,950 --> 00:38:13,642
- Can you spell?
- Yes, but not accurately.

493
00:38:18,281 --> 00:38:20,580
I don't understand
Shakespeare.

494
00:38:20,593 --> 00:38:22,902
We'll cross that bridge
when we come to it.

495
00:38:23,278 --> 00:38:26,367
Talking of Shakespeare,
we're missing the Queen.

496
00:38:46,299 --> 00:38:49,355
<i>I here present unto you Queen Elizabeth...</i>

497
00:38:50,030 --> 00:38:51,461
<i>your undoubted Queen.</i>

498
00:38:51,529 --> 00:38:52,517
Improves the contrast.

499
00:38:52,596 --> 00:38:56,151
<i>Wherefore all you who are come this day...</i>

500
00:38:56,694 --> 00:38:58,714
<i>to do your homage and service...</i>

501
00:38:59,125 --> 00:39:01,181
<i>are you willing to do the same?</i>

502
00:39:06,355 --> 00:39:08,717
This is a new experience for me.

503
00:39:10,052 --> 00:39:11,176
Yes?

504
00:39:11,818 --> 00:39:13,182
Television.

505
00:39:14,185 --> 00:39:16,206
I've never seen it before.

506
00:39:17,249 --> 00:39:20,591
<i>...to govern the peoples
of the United Kingdom...</i>

507
00:39:20,697 --> 00:39:21,987
Do you like it?

508
00:39:24,255 --> 00:39:25,347
This?

509
00:39:28,756 --> 00:39:30,121
Television.

510
00:39:32,690 --> 00:39:37,487
<i>...the other territories according to
their respective laws and customs?</i>

511
00:39:38,091 --> 00:39:40,250
<i>I solemnly promise so to do.</i>

512
00:40:00,896 --> 00:40:03,258
It's the beginning of a new era.

513
00:40:56,350 --> 00:41:00,252
<i>Thence goes Queen Elizabeth
to sit in King Edward's Chair...</i>

514
00:41:00,621 --> 00:41:03,784
<i>for the most sacred rite of her anointing.</i>

515
00:41:14,669 --> 00:41:16,630
Are you up here helping John?

516
00:41:16,696 --> 00:41:18,218
Holding his hand.

517
00:41:18,829 --> 00:41:21,459
Did Kenneth ever come up to Leicester?

518
00:41:23,436 --> 00:41:24,993
Did you like him?

519
00:41:26,172 --> 00:41:28,139
I didn't dislike him.

520
00:41:28,206 --> 00:41:30,731
I could see what he saw in Joe, after all.

521
00:41:31,376 --> 00:41:34,243
I couldn't really see what Joe saw in him.

522
00:41:34,714 --> 00:41:37,146
Of course, I didn't know what went on.

523
00:41:37,248 --> 00:41:39,374
Upstairs, come on.

524
00:41:41,219 --> 00:41:44,746
Did you know that Joe was that way?

525
00:41:46,858 --> 00:41:48,827
- Yes.
- You didn't.

526
00:41:48,893 --> 00:41:51,657
I did and I didn't.

527
00:41:52,564 --> 00:41:54,465
The way you do, don't you?

528
00:41:54,800 --> 00:41:59,202
Mind you, at our Douglas' wedding,
Mom found him in bed with a bridesmaid.

529
00:42:01,273 --> 00:42:04,003
So you see? It's as I say.

530
00:42:04,476 --> 00:42:06,876
He couldn't have learned it in Leicester.

531
00:42:06,945 --> 00:42:08,538
He was corrupted.

532
00:42:09,748 --> 00:42:11,909
Joe wanted something from Kenneth.

533
00:42:11,983 --> 00:42:14,919
And Kenneth wanted something
from Joe.  It's not corruption.

534
00:42:15,454 --> 00:42:16,919
It's collaboration.

535
00:42:17,456 --> 00:42:20,583
He was born that way,
or else it was my mom.

536
00:42:20,658 --> 00:42:22,182
Women don't care anyway.

537
00:42:22,260 --> 00:42:25,661
- I don't care what men get up to.
- I don't care where they put it.

538
00:42:25,730 --> 00:42:27,995
As long as they don't put it there.

539
00:42:28,067 --> 00:42:30,035
Didn't I say upstairs?

540
00:42:30,535 --> 00:42:32,799
A taste of their own medicine.

541
00:42:35,207 --> 00:42:39,199
The lavatories shocked me a bit
when I read his diary, but...

542
00:42:40,445 --> 00:42:42,505
A boy stopped me the other day...

543
00:42:42,581 --> 00:42:46,209
and said, "I want to thank you for
your brother's plays. " So what do you do?

544
00:42:46,284 --> 00:42:48,981
Yes, I feel quite grateful
for his plays myself.

545
00:42:49,522 --> 00:42:52,513
Personally, I think a
lot of that is made up.

546
00:42:53,425 --> 00:42:55,485
- What?
- The toilets.

547
00:42:56,729 --> 00:42:59,391
You have to go into all that, do you?

548
00:43:02,635 --> 00:43:04,965
It all seems a bit unnecessary to me.

549
00:43:05,068 --> 00:43:08,665
The lawn mower is not unnecessary.
The Fiesta is not unnecessary.

550
00:43:08,908 --> 00:43:10,940
You ought to be grateful
we get money from his plays.

551
00:43:11,009 --> 00:43:14,140
Grateful? I work, too, you know.

552
00:43:14,846 --> 00:43:17,815
This isn't royalties.
This is plumbing money, this is.

553
00:43:17,883 --> 00:43:20,374
He's nothing in Leicester, Joe Orton.

554
00:43:21,820 --> 00:43:23,288
- Ken?
- What?

555
00:43:24,823 --> 00:43:27,724
You know you could be
put in prison for this.

556
00:43:27,793 --> 00:43:29,261
So could you.

557
00:43:30,228 --> 00:43:31,455
No.

558
00:43:32,965 --> 00:43:34,728
I'm the innocent party.

559
00:43:42,740 --> 00:43:44,709
No, I want to get on.

560
00:43:46,011 --> 00:43:48,844
Writing, John, is one-tenth inspiration,
nine-tenths...

561
00:43:48,913 --> 00:43:50,541
Masturbation.

562
00:44:29,822 --> 00:44:32,518
That's a library book.
You should respect books.

563
00:44:32,591 --> 00:44:36,027
I respect them more than you.
You just take them for granted.

564
00:44:40,331 --> 00:44:42,899
Shit, I'll never catch up.

565
00:44:43,069 --> 00:44:46,533
So what's this?
We are halfway through a novel.

566
00:44:47,839 --> 00:44:49,238
You are, you mean.

567
00:44:50,442 --> 00:44:52,637
It's a collaboration, dear.

568
00:44:54,579 --> 00:44:55,877
We've written it together.

569
00:44:55,948 --> 00:44:57,778
- Stop it, I'm reading.
- You're not.

570
00:44:57,849 --> 00:44:59,750
- Test me, then.
- What on?

571
00:44:59,819 --> 00:45:01,149
Mythology.

572
00:45:02,521 --> 00:45:04,249
Who is the father of Oedipus?

573
00:45:04,322 --> 00:45:06,257
- Laius.
- Who is his mother?

574
00:45:06,758 --> 00:45:08,225
Fuck his mother.

575
00:45:12,630 --> 00:45:14,097
<i>Boy Hairdresser.</i>

576
00:45:14,565 --> 00:45:15,864
Nice title.

577
00:45:16,501 --> 00:45:18,492
I've shown it to one or two...

578
00:45:19,171 --> 00:45:21,366
selected colleagues...

579
00:45:22,542 --> 00:45:25,008
- and we laughed.
- You're kidding.

580
00:45:25,743 --> 00:45:27,541
We had a real chuckle.

581
00:45:29,015 --> 00:45:31,947
The trouble is that normal sex...

582
00:45:32,584 --> 00:45:34,711
is still a novelty for most people...

583
00:45:35,087 --> 00:45:36,612
in book form.

584
00:45:37,623 --> 00:45:39,386
A book such as yours...

585
00:45:39,826 --> 00:45:43,262
- which very wittily...
- We thought it was witty.

586
00:45:44,997 --> 00:45:49,160
...explores the byways of sexuality...

587
00:45:50,369 --> 00:45:52,337
is ahead of its time.

588
00:45:54,473 --> 00:45:56,838
We are a very conservative firm.

589
00:46:03,481 --> 00:46:05,540
Isn't one of the directors T.S. Eliot?

590
00:46:06,417 --> 00:46:07,908
Yes, that's right.

591
00:46:07,986 --> 00:46:09,782
Is he in the building?

592
00:46:14,693 --> 00:46:16,661
Thursday. Yes, he is.

593
00:46:16,727 --> 00:46:19,993
Fancy, John,
we're under the same roof as T.S. Eliot.

594
00:46:24,002 --> 00:46:26,334
He wants to know which is his chair.

595
00:46:29,641 --> 00:46:30,868
This one.

596
00:46:37,048 --> 00:46:39,812
Yes, well, thank you very much
for letting us see this.

597
00:46:39,884 --> 00:46:42,074
You can keep it a little
longer if you want.

598
00:46:42,087 --> 00:46:44,288
Show it to a few
more friends.

599
00:46:44,656 --> 00:46:46,145
Thank you, no.

600
00:46:49,028 --> 00:46:51,962
And remember, next time
you see Mr. Eliot...

601
00:46:52,596 --> 00:46:55,431
tell him he has two devoted fans
in Islington...

602
00:46:55,501 --> 00:46:58,401
<i>who think The Waste Land
is a real knockout.</i>

603
00:47:02,308 --> 00:47:03,331
Never mind.

604
00:47:03,407 --> 00:47:06,399
At least you can say
you sat in the same chair as T.S. Eliot.

605
00:47:06,479 --> 00:47:09,004
Yes, I'm never gonna wipe my bum again.

606
00:47:09,816 --> 00:47:13,273
Why did you leave all the talking to me?
It's your book as much as mine.

607
00:47:13,352 --> 00:47:15,586
I'm shy. It's not my territory.

608
00:47:17,513 --> 00:47:19,275
Now this is dead-center me.

609
00:47:22,083 --> 00:47:23,380
Nice bum.

610
00:47:23,451 --> 00:47:25,475
- He heard that.
- So what?

611
00:47:26,120 --> 00:47:27,586
Now you're shy.

612
00:47:30,789 --> 00:47:33,690
This is Mr. Halliwell.

613
00:47:36,094 --> 00:47:37,493
Really?

614
00:47:38,362 --> 00:47:40,454
Doesn't knock on my box one bit.

615
00:47:42,031 --> 00:47:43,759
He's got a big one.

616
00:47:46,502 --> 00:47:49,664
- How do you know?
- It's written all over his face.

617
00:47:53,173 --> 00:47:56,335
- Look at the package on that.
- Where?

618
00:47:57,943 --> 00:48:00,241
- We're on.
- I didn't see anything. What did he do?

619
00:48:00,311 --> 00:48:02,039
What do you want, a telegram? Come on!

620
00:48:13,556 --> 00:48:15,988
He's built like a brick shithouse.

621
00:48:17,323 --> 00:48:20,781
- He's probably a policeman.
- Yes, I know. Isn't he wonderful?

622
00:48:39,909 --> 00:48:42,273
Listen. We've got tickets for the Proms.

623
00:49:03,725 --> 00:49:06,125
All right. What's your name?

624
00:49:06,628 --> 00:49:09,118
- What do you mean, what's my name?
- Mine's Kevin.

625
00:49:09,198 --> 00:49:10,687
Mine's Howard.

626
00:49:11,233 --> 00:49:13,665
- That's a poncey name.
- Patrick, then.

627
00:49:13,867 --> 00:49:16,733
Catholic, are you? What do you do?

628
00:49:17,036 --> 00:49:19,734
- I don't know. What do you do?
- I'm a fitter, car components.

629
00:49:19,804 --> 00:49:20,796
I'm a dog handler.

630
00:49:20,872 --> 00:49:23,701
On an individual basis,
or are you a tool of a large organization?

631
00:49:23,774 --> 00:49:27,708
I'm so shit scared, I don't know
if I'll be able to do anything.

632
00:49:28,677 --> 00:49:31,683
We don't want to let this
make us late for the Proms.

633
00:49:31,718 --> 00:49:33,861
Listen, sweetheart, which do you prefer?

634
00:49:33,896 --> 00:49:35,615
Him or Sir Malcolm Sargent?

635
00:49:49,594 --> 00:49:52,255
Hello. My name's Kevin.

636
00:49:52,763 --> 00:49:54,956
- Mine's Kenneth.
- Mine's Kenneth, too.

637
00:49:55,030 --> 00:49:57,591
- Shit.
- Only, my friends call me Patrick.

638
00:49:57,667 --> 00:49:59,394
We're all friends here.

639
00:50:07,374 --> 00:50:08,841
Do you kiss?

640
00:50:57,179 --> 00:50:59,269
I don't think he likes me.

641
00:51:00,614 --> 00:51:02,274
You like him, don't you?

642
00:51:02,481 --> 00:51:03,641
Sure.

643
00:51:06,819 --> 00:51:07,978
Kiss him.

644
00:51:38,892 --> 00:51:41,053
<i>And so, 10 years passed.</i>

645
00:51:41,561 --> 00:51:44,927
<i>- Not like that.
- No, silly, not like that.</i>

646
00:51:45,965 --> 00:51:50,264
<i>Nothing happened. Looking back on it,
I suppose it was some kind of preparation.</i>

647
00:51:51,069 --> 00:51:52,831
<i>An education, maybe.</i>

648
00:51:52,904 --> 00:51:55,872
<i>Well, if it seemed like that to Joe,
it can't have done to Ken.</i>

649
00:51:55,939 --> 00:51:58,497
<i>- No.
- His hair was falling out.</i>

650
00:51:58,573 --> 00:51:59,733
<i>God, I know the feeling.</i>

651
00:51:59,808 --> 00:52:02,539
<i>And whereas he'd stopped writing,
Joe had started.</i>

652
00:52:02,612 --> 00:52:05,579
<i>Still, they were both failures,
so it didn't matter.</i>

653
00:52:05,646 --> 00:52:08,205
<i>- It didn't matter yet.
- Quite.</i>

654
00:52:33,568 --> 00:52:36,934
You want rice pudding
with the sardines or separate?

655
00:52:37,370 --> 00:52:38,563
With.

656
00:52:46,143 --> 00:52:47,201
Jam?

657
00:52:48,178 --> 00:52:49,270
No.

658
00:53:00,054 --> 00:53:02,886
Mozart was dead by the time he was my age.

659
00:53:03,390 --> 00:53:06,289
- I'm not even young anymore.
- What about me?

660
00:53:06,760 --> 00:53:08,249
You never were.

661
00:53:14,031 --> 00:53:17,158
I can't see
how we are ever going to make our mark...

662
00:53:18,434 --> 00:53:20,664
defacing library books.

663
00:53:48,441 --> 00:53:50,379
You didn't tell me one
of them was a nancy.

664
00:53:50,392 --> 00:53:52,341
I'm sorry,
Mr. Cunliffe?

665
00:53:52,510 --> 00:53:54,569
The bald one, Miss Batersby.

666
00:53:54,645 --> 00:53:57,909
A homosexual. A shirtlifter.

667
00:53:58,914 --> 00:54:01,748
- In Islington?
- Haven't you noticed?

668
00:54:02,217 --> 00:54:04,616
Large areas of the borough
are being restored...

669
00:54:04,685 --> 00:54:06,710
and painted Thames green.

670
00:54:08,956 --> 00:54:10,546
Noel Road.

671
00:54:11,057 --> 00:54:14,493
This calls for a little detective work,
Miss Batersby.

672
00:54:22,734 --> 00:54:25,462
"Fucked by Monty. " Indeed!

673
00:54:26,969 --> 00:54:29,334
Men died! Died!

674
00:54:39,846 --> 00:54:41,404
Registration:

675
00:54:41,848 --> 00:54:43,246
K- Y-R...

676
00:54:43,782 --> 00:54:45,510
4-5-0.

677
00:54:47,184 --> 00:54:49,118
The above-mentioned vehicle...

678
00:54:49,519 --> 00:54:52,716
appears to be derelict and abandoned...

679
00:54:53,088 --> 00:54:54,852
in Noel Road...

680
00:54:56,723 --> 00:54:59,317
and I have been given to understand...

681
00:54:59,861 --> 00:55:02,227
you are the owner thereof.

682
00:55:02,862 --> 00:55:04,830
"But before enforcing remedies...

683
00:55:04,897 --> 00:55:09,025
"I give you the opportunity
to remove the vehicle from the highway. "

684
00:55:09,467 --> 00:55:11,127
The little prick.

685
00:55:11,770 --> 00:55:14,136
Unzip our trusty Remington, John.

686
00:55:14,205 --> 00:55:17,297
We will piss on this person
from a great height.

687
00:55:18,675 --> 00:55:20,199
"Humber Hawk" indeed.

688
00:55:20,710 --> 00:55:25,237
Dear sir,
thank you for your dreary little letter...

689
00:55:25,313 --> 00:55:27,042
- "Dismal" is better.
- "Dismal," then.

690
00:55:27,114 --> 00:55:28,741
I should like to know...

691
00:55:28,815 --> 00:55:32,945
who provided you
with this mysterious information.

692
00:55:33,119 --> 00:55:36,519
"Furnished" is better than "provided. "
It's more municipal in tone.

693
00:55:37,655 --> 00:55:41,819
You will note the typing,
Miss Batersby, is the same.

694
00:55:43,392 --> 00:55:45,155
Our book jacket...

695
00:55:46,063 --> 00:55:47,621
their letter.

696
00:55:50,165 --> 00:55:52,099
Got you, my beauties.

697
00:55:52,967 --> 00:55:57,460
<i>This is the novel Clouds of Witness
by the noted authoress Dorothy L. Sayers.</i>

698
00:55:58,237 --> 00:56:02,570
Could you read what the accused
have written on the flap of the jacket?

699
00:56:02,941 --> 00:56:06,240
"When little Betty McDree says
she has been interfered with...

700
00:56:06,311 --> 00:56:08,107
"her mother first laughs.

701
00:56:08,179 --> 00:56:11,545
"'Lt is only something the kitty
has picked up off the television. '

702
00:56:11,615 --> 00:56:13,674
"But when sorting through the laundry...

703
00:56:13,750 --> 00:56:16,912
"Mrs. McDree discovers
a new pair of knickers are missing...

704
00:56:16,986 --> 00:56:18,646
"she thinks again.

705
00:56:19,020 --> 00:56:21,716
"Her mother takes little Betty
to the police station...

706
00:56:21,955 --> 00:56:23,752
"where to everyone's surprise...

707
00:56:23,824 --> 00:56:27,281
"she identifies P.C. Brecken-Coolidge
as her attacker.

708
00:56:28,193 --> 00:56:30,690
"A search is made
of the women's police barracks.

709
00:56:31,632 --> 00:56:34,187
"What is found there
is a seven-inch phallus...

710
00:56:34,263 --> 00:56:37,384
"and a pair of knickers
of the type used by Betty.

711
00:56:37,459 --> 00:56:40,184
"All looks black for kindly P.C. Coolidge.

712
00:56:40,856 --> 00:56:44,376
"This is one of the most enthralling
stories ever written by Miss Sayers.

713
00:56:44,452 --> 00:56:46,746
"Read it behind closed doors...

714
00:56:48,515 --> 00:56:51,569
"and have a good shit
while you're reading it. "

715
00:56:55,209 --> 00:56:59,298
The probation officer has suggested
that you are both frustrated authors.

716
00:57:01,137 --> 00:57:03,158
If you are so clever at making fun...

717
00:57:03,235 --> 00:57:05,960
of what more talented
people have written...

718
00:57:06,033 --> 00:57:08,552
you should have a shot
at writing books yourselves.

719
00:57:08,629 --> 00:57:11,184
You won't find that such a pushover.

720
00:57:11,527 --> 00:57:14,513
Sheer malice and destruction,
the pair of you.

721
00:57:14,790 --> 00:57:16,914
I sentence you both to six months.

722
00:57:16,990 --> 00:57:19,045
- Fucking A.
- It was your idea.

723
00:57:19,486 --> 00:57:21,314
But I'm the youngest.

724
00:57:25,481 --> 00:57:27,706
<i>Prison worked wonders for Joe.</i>

725
00:57:27,945 --> 00:57:29,341
<i>And being a man, of course...</i>

726
00:57:29,411 --> 00:57:32,397
<i>he made out it was much more of an ordeal
than in fact it was.</i>

727
00:57:32,474 --> 00:57:35,868
<i>- Where did he go?
- Brixton, for about five minutes...</i>

728
00:57:35,937 --> 00:57:38,457
<i>then one of those open places in Sussex.</i>

729
00:57:38,535 --> 00:57:41,896
<i>Quite near my health farm, actually,
and with much the same effect.</i>

730
00:57:41,966 --> 00:57:44,293
<i>Though at rather less expense.</i>

731
00:57:44,663 --> 00:57:45,650
<i>Yes.</i>

732
00:57:46,029 --> 00:57:48,491
<i>And at my place you don't get psychiatry.</i>

733
00:57:48,559 --> 00:57:50,523
What about your parents?

734
00:57:56,185 --> 00:57:58,671
Dead. Both of them.

735
00:57:58,916 --> 00:58:00,845
When I was a little kiddie.

736
00:58:00,914 --> 00:58:02,572
I'm an orphan.

737
00:58:05,045 --> 00:58:07,304
The guy I share a room with...

738
00:58:07,608 --> 00:58:08,766
Ken...

739
00:58:09,339 --> 00:58:11,599
he cracks on he's the orphan.

740
00:58:12,736 --> 00:58:14,257
Don't you believe him.

741
00:58:14,701 --> 00:58:16,222
He reckons he got up one morning...

742
00:58:16,300 --> 00:58:18,423
and found his dad
with his head in the gas oven.

743
00:58:18,498 --> 00:58:20,587
Didn't even call the ambulance.

744
00:58:24,526 --> 00:58:26,320
How is he, by the way?

745
00:58:29,454 --> 00:58:31,248
That was your mother.

746
00:58:31,577 --> 00:58:34,006
Tell me about your father.

747
00:58:34,674 --> 00:58:37,728
There's nothing to tell. I was 18...

748
00:58:38,837 --> 00:58:42,526
I came down one morning and found him
with his head in the gas oven.

749
00:58:43,400 --> 00:58:45,489
You called the ambulance, naturally?

750
00:58:45,563 --> 00:58:46,892
Oh, eventually.

751
00:58:47,095 --> 00:58:48,788
I made a cup of tea first.

752
00:58:49,294 --> 00:58:51,314
He was quite plainly dead.

753
00:58:52,025 --> 00:58:54,614
- You weren't fond of him.
- Not particularly.

754
00:58:55,122 --> 00:58:57,279
You're fond of your roommate.

755
00:58:57,587 --> 00:58:59,607
We're everything to one another.

756
00:59:00,816 --> 00:59:02,404
Sleep together, do you?

757
00:59:03,447 --> 00:59:04,503
No...

758
00:59:05,512 --> 00:59:06,908
but we have sex.

759
00:59:08,509 --> 00:59:09,769
Are you sure?

760
00:59:10,907 --> 00:59:11,894
Yes.

761
00:59:12,307 --> 00:59:14,770
You don't mean you want to have sex?

762
00:59:15,703 --> 00:59:17,893
No, we do.

763
00:59:19,266 --> 00:59:23,523
But your friend's not like that, is he?
He's married, he's got a child.

764
00:59:23,595 --> 00:59:26,081
So you're surprised, are you?

765
00:59:29,623 --> 00:59:30,918
Not really.

766
00:59:32,022 --> 00:59:34,450
This may come as a shock to you...

767
00:59:34,950 --> 00:59:37,041
but I suspect your friend...

768
00:59:37,916 --> 00:59:40,037
may be homosexual.

769
00:59:41,279 --> 00:59:42,504
Jesus!

770
00:59:43,210 --> 00:59:46,400
And there I am,
sleeping in the same room with him.

771
00:59:47,306 --> 00:59:50,633
You mentioned your wife.
Where is she now?

772
00:59:50,704 --> 00:59:53,724
The last I heard,
she'd taken the kid to Lyme Regis.

773
00:59:55,966 --> 00:59:58,293
Try and team up with them again.

774
00:59:58,963 --> 01:00:00,723
Make a fresh start.

775
01:00:01,526 --> 01:00:03,082
Don't you worry.

776
01:00:12,682 --> 01:00:14,544
Not too Spartan, is it?

777
01:00:14,781 --> 01:00:17,438
On the contrary, a room of one's own.

778
01:00:24,871 --> 01:00:27,027
<i>Prison gives a writer credentials.</i>

779
01:00:27,101 --> 01:00:29,532
<i>Everyone else, it takes them away.</i>

780
01:00:30,092 --> 01:00:33,282
<i>It was the first time in 10 years
they'd been split up.</i>

781
01:00:33,388 --> 01:00:37,216
<i>- So prison was a taste of freedom.
- For Joe.</i>

782
01:00:37,618 --> 01:00:39,309
When did you do this?

783
01:00:39,382 --> 01:00:42,073
- I haven't seen this.
- It's a radio play.

784
01:00:42,146 --> 01:00:43,873
I did it on my own in prison.

785
01:00:43,945 --> 01:00:46,430
- I've sent it to the BBC.
- Why didn't you tell me?

786
01:00:46,509 --> 01:00:49,439
I could help you write a proper letter.
You'll never hear back.

787
01:00:49,507 --> 01:00:50,972
I already have.

788
01:00:59,929 --> 01:01:01,826
"We had a little room...

789
01:01:02,660 --> 01:01:06,645
"and our life was made quite comfortable
by the National Assistance Board.

790
01:01:07,957 --> 01:01:11,078
"We had a lot of friends
of all creeds and colors...

791
01:01:11,153 --> 01:01:13,378
"and no circumstances at all.

792
01:01:13,617 --> 01:01:15,514
"We were happy enough.

793
01:01:17,847 --> 01:01:19,368
"We were young. "

794
01:01:19,711 --> 01:01:22,903
<i>"I was 17 and he was 23.</i>

795
01:01:23,675 --> 01:01:26,263
"You can't do better for
yourself than that, can you?

796
01:01:26,338 --> 01:01:28,199
"We were bosom friends. "

797
01:01:28,837 --> 01:01:31,594
- "I hope I haven't shocked you. "
- "As close as that?"

798
01:01:31,666 --> 01:01:33,427
"We had separate beds. "

799
01:01:33,631 --> 01:01:35,891
"He was a stickler for appearances.

800
01:01:36,463 --> 01:01:39,052
"But we spent every night
in each other's company.

801
01:01:39,127 --> 01:01:41,818
"It was the reason
we never got any work done.

802
01:01:41,992 --> 01:01:44,387
"I used to base my life around him. "

803
01:01:44,654 --> 01:01:46,846
- "Don't often get that, do you?"
- "No. "

804
01:01:47,585 --> 01:01:49,378
"He had personality. "

805
01:01:49,883 --> 01:01:53,471
Could we make that line read
"stickler for convention"?

806
01:01:54,080 --> 01:01:56,407
"His mentality wasn't fully developed.

807
01:01:56,610 --> 01:01:59,369
"He was bound to make good
sooner or later. "

808
01:02:06,334 --> 01:02:08,571
<i>I knew nothing about him
when he walked in.</i>

809
01:02:09,313 --> 01:02:10,744
Mr. Orton...

810
01:02:11,311 --> 01:02:13,468
- Hello.
- Hello, dear.

811
01:02:14,241 --> 01:02:17,035
<i>I thought the radio play was derivative.
I said so.</i>

812
01:02:17,107 --> 01:02:19,093
<i>- Did he mind?
- Not at all.</i>

813
01:02:19,404 --> 01:02:22,230
I'm writing a better one for the stage.

814
01:02:23,033 --> 01:02:25,428
Mr. Orton, that would be gorgeous.

815
01:02:29,460 --> 01:02:32,581
Would it be rude to inquire
how you're managing to live?

816
01:02:33,022 --> 01:02:35,747
National Assistance, £3.10 a week.

817
01:02:36,353 --> 01:02:38,645
I'm afraid I've just come out of jail.

818
01:02:38,983 --> 01:02:40,209
Excellent.

819
01:02:41,148 --> 01:02:43,113
The papers will love all that.

820
01:02:50,470 --> 01:02:53,299
This is what we call an advance.

821
01:02:54,700 --> 01:02:58,061
It means that when you finish
the new play you're writing...

822
01:02:58,563 --> 01:03:00,754
the one that's going to be better...

823
01:03:01,460 --> 01:03:03,480
you bring it along and show me.

824
01:03:08,353 --> 01:03:09,907
John Orton.

825
01:03:10,418 --> 01:03:11,779
Don't like that.

826
01:03:12,416 --> 01:03:15,004
Sounds too much like John Osborne.

827
01:03:15,646 --> 01:03:18,165
Are you attached to John as a name?

828
01:03:18,576 --> 01:03:19,598
No.

829
01:03:19,942 --> 01:03:22,064
Try to think of another one, dear.

830
01:03:24,304 --> 01:03:26,029
Next time I come...

831
01:03:26,502 --> 01:03:28,125
can I bring my friend?

832
01:03:36,323 --> 01:03:40,581
Right around the back, and when you
hit the middle of the sofa, lunge.

833
01:03:40,653 --> 01:03:41,879
Yes.

834
01:03:41,952 --> 01:03:43,745
- Is that better, Joe?
- Fine.

835
01:03:43,816 --> 01:03:46,713
- Is the view better for you?
- It's better for me.

836
01:03:46,780 --> 01:03:48,801
Except, it's not our play.

837
01:03:52,042 --> 01:03:55,765
You're making it into a cheap sex farce.
That's not what we wrote.

838
01:03:55,838 --> 01:03:56,824
We?

839
01:03:56,903 --> 01:03:59,367
- Ken thinks...
- You wrote this play, I'm directing it.

840
01:03:59,435 --> 01:04:03,089
I don't give a damn what this refugee
from a secondhand clothes shop thinks.

841
01:04:03,163 --> 01:04:05,786
I will not have him in rehearsal.
It fucks up the actors.

842
01:04:05,861 --> 01:04:08,086
- He's a friend.
- After all, it's your play.

843
01:04:08,158 --> 01:04:09,645
It is your play, isn't it?

844
01:04:30,235 --> 01:04:31,961
You just want to be liked.

845
01:04:32,034 --> 01:04:33,759
That's your trouble.

846
01:04:35,962 --> 01:04:38,120
Am I 25 or 26?

847
01:04:39,459 --> 01:04:41,185
For publicity purposes.

848
01:04:41,916 --> 01:04:44,810
Peggy's been pestering me
for some undisputed facts.

849
01:04:44,878 --> 01:04:48,274
Why not tell the truth? 31, "Joe. "

850
01:04:48,575 --> 01:04:50,334
I can't put 31.

851
01:04:51,505 --> 01:04:53,094
I don't look 31.

852
01:04:53,337 --> 01:04:55,800
Besides, 31 is a well-known bus.

853
01:04:56,800 --> 01:04:58,196
Married or single?

854
01:04:59,964 --> 01:05:01,293
Married...

855
01:05:02,127 --> 01:05:03,488
Divorced.

856
01:05:04,359 --> 01:05:05,346
One kid.

857
01:05:16,346 --> 01:05:18,311
I've dedicated it to you.

858
01:05:19,277 --> 01:05:21,139
What more do you want?

859
01:05:22,574 --> 01:05:24,333
Did you put my full name?

860
01:05:26,869 --> 01:05:28,423
Or just Kenneth?

861
01:05:32,462 --> 01:05:34,484
I'll put your phone
number, too, if you want.

862
01:05:39,189 --> 01:05:40,449
Why now?

863
01:05:41,420 --> 01:05:43,146
You're not ashamed of me?

864
01:05:49,179 --> 01:05:52,801
Hair loss is often thought of
as a sign of sexual potency.

865
01:05:52,976 --> 01:05:55,132
Does your experience bear that out?

866
01:05:55,939 --> 01:05:59,027
More people wear wigs
than is commonly realized.

867
01:05:59,967 --> 01:06:01,591
Trades union leaders...

868
01:06:02,265 --> 01:06:03,959
sporting personalities...

869
01:06:04,897 --> 01:06:06,884
members of the royal family.

870
01:06:11,557 --> 01:06:13,646
It's better than the beret.

871
01:06:14,419 --> 01:06:16,110
Shall we keep it on?

872
01:06:18,083 --> 01:06:19,638
Yes, I think so.

873
01:06:21,014 --> 01:06:23,499
I shall wear it to our first night.

874
01:06:25,708 --> 01:06:27,196
It'll be £70.

875
01:06:29,837 --> 01:06:31,233
£70?

876
01:06:31,935 --> 01:06:33,400
This is on me.

877
01:06:35,031 --> 01:06:36,724
And this is on me.

878
01:06:40,658 --> 01:06:43,952
I'm not calling you "Joe. "
You sound like rough trade.

879
01:06:44,655 --> 01:06:48,084
To me, you're John. You'll always be John.

880
01:06:50,183 --> 01:06:51,841
For Ken and Joe...

881
01:06:52,782 --> 01:06:54,540
opportunity knocked.

882
01:07:13,958 --> 01:07:15,945
I just want to see if it works.

883
01:07:17,089 --> 01:07:18,213
What?

884
01:07:18,388 --> 01:07:19,683
The wig.

885
01:07:20,619 --> 01:07:22,515
I'm going to end up like you.

886
01:07:23,282 --> 01:07:24,270
Yes.

887
01:07:24,716 --> 01:07:25,840
Stay there.

888
01:07:36,867 --> 01:07:37,991
All right?

889
01:08:05,106 --> 01:08:07,933
You got the time?

890
01:08:09,901 --> 01:08:11,388
Not right now.

891
01:08:15,428 --> 01:08:16,519
Hey.

892
01:08:21,056 --> 01:08:22,986
You see the fellow in the wig?

893
01:08:23,588 --> 01:08:25,711
He's wanting it, ask him.

894
01:08:27,883 --> 01:08:29,074
Oh, fear.

895
01:08:39,272 --> 01:08:40,463
Go on.

896
01:08:45,366 --> 01:08:46,693
Got a match?

897
01:08:47,663 --> 01:08:49,683
- What?
- A light.

898
01:08:54,822 --> 01:08:57,286
- I'm afraid I haven't.
- Pity.

899
01:09:00,382 --> 01:09:03,244
I was thinking of popping in
for a Jimmy Riddle.

900
01:09:03,346 --> 01:09:04,607
You know.

901
01:09:14,235 --> 01:09:15,495
It works.

902
01:09:17,333 --> 01:09:19,420
- It really works.
- Go on, get in there.

903
01:09:19,496 --> 01:09:20,518
I daren't.

904
01:09:20,595 --> 01:09:22,718
- Do you want me to come?
- No.

905
01:09:31,519 --> 01:09:32,676
Go on.

906
01:09:40,565 --> 01:09:43,859
<i>They are called cottages, you know.
Gentlemen's lavs.</i>

907
01:09:44,097 --> 01:09:46,752
<i>In the States, it's tearooms.</i>

908
01:09:47,227 --> 01:09:48,523
<i>Really?</i>

909
01:09:49,026 --> 01:09:51,856
<i>In England, tearooms
are something quite different.</i>

910
01:09:51,926 --> 01:09:53,515
<i>So are cottages.</i>

911
01:09:53,859 --> 01:09:56,655
<i>Have you ever seen anything going on?</i>

912
01:10:19,190 --> 01:10:22,020
You don't want it stuck up your ass,
by any chance?

913
01:10:22,957 --> 01:10:25,218
If you mean what I think you mean...

914
01:10:25,989 --> 01:10:27,046
no.

915
01:10:27,690 --> 01:10:29,349
No harm in asking.

916
01:10:35,822 --> 01:10:37,118
Ken!

917
01:10:45,888 --> 01:10:47,184
We were just having a chat.

918
01:10:47,254 --> 01:10:50,311
- The police! Out! Quick!
- Jesus.

919
01:11:23,960 --> 01:11:25,218
Thank you.

920
01:11:33,551 --> 01:11:36,743
<i>My second play, Loot,
is a bigger hit than my first.</i>

921
01:11:37,547 --> 01:11:41,442
It's also a better play,
and it is the critics' choice.

922
01:11:41,678 --> 01:11:43,267
Best play of the year.

923
01:11:43,776 --> 01:11:46,704
The film rights have been sold
for a record figure.

924
01:11:46,773 --> 01:11:49,464
Currently I am working on a screenplay
for four boys...

925
01:11:49,538 --> 01:11:50,900
who are nudging Jesus Christ...

926
01:11:50,969 --> 01:11:53,831
for position of number one
most famous person ever.

927
01:11:54,400 --> 01:11:56,990
But have I ever met these fabled creatures?

928
01:11:57,063 --> 01:11:59,584
Have I ever met their manager,
Ms. Brian Epstein...

929
01:11:59,662 --> 01:12:01,488
and have I been paid?

930
01:12:02,060 --> 01:12:04,545
No. Then why am I doing it?

931
01:12:05,190 --> 01:12:06,381
Vanity.

932
01:12:06,555 --> 01:12:09,815
I'm going to jack it in,
Beatles or no Beatles.

933
01:12:11,583 --> 01:12:13,639
What I would like to do at this moment...

934
01:12:13,715 --> 01:12:16,906
would be to ease down
their Liverpudlian underpants...

935
01:12:16,979 --> 01:12:19,943
and ram my Remington up their arses.

936
01:12:21,233 --> 01:12:23,256
The lovable mop-heads.

937
01:12:23,898 --> 01:12:26,556
- What about me?
- What about you?

938
01:12:27,629 --> 01:12:30,682
I can't remember
when you last touched my cock.

939
01:12:32,924 --> 01:12:34,718
I can, actually.

940
01:12:35,022 --> 01:12:37,248
It was about two years ago.

941
01:12:38,019 --> 01:12:40,483
Only, I can't remember the actual date.

942
01:12:40,884 --> 01:12:41,974
Pity.

943
01:12:42,682 --> 01:12:44,872
I could have put it in my diary.

944
01:12:45,712 --> 01:12:48,609
"The last time Joe touched my cock.

945
01:12:51,707 --> 01:12:53,569
"Grouse shooting begins. "

946
01:12:58,900 --> 01:13:00,592
Maybe we should go away.

947
01:13:01,299 --> 01:13:05,420
Somewhere where there is plenty of sex.
And I don't mean Southport.

948
01:13:06,460 --> 01:13:08,925
Somewhere even you might be happy.

949
01:13:10,723 --> 01:13:12,416
Morocco, maybe.

950
01:13:14,420 --> 01:13:15,818
What do you think?

951
01:13:19,216 --> 01:13:21,114
I don't want to go away.

952
01:13:23,112 --> 01:13:25,235
I just want to go to the awards.

953
01:13:25,310 --> 01:13:28,070
I could! Look, "Joe Orton and guest. "

954
01:13:28,375 --> 01:13:30,600
I'd behave. I wouldn't
say a word, I promise.

955
01:13:30,673 --> 01:13:31,729
- No.
- Why?

956
01:13:31,805 --> 01:13:34,394
- Because it's for me. I wrote it.
- I gave you the title.

957
01:13:34,469 --> 01:13:37,523
Okay, so when they have awards for titles,
you can go to that.

958
01:13:53,686 --> 01:13:54,742
Yes?

959
01:13:58,514 --> 01:14:01,001
No, this is Mr. Orton's personal assistant.

960
01:14:03,911 --> 01:14:05,898
No, he's tied up at the moment.

961
01:14:08,971 --> 01:14:10,198
I see.

962
01:14:12,369 --> 01:14:13,357
Yes.

963
01:14:17,264 --> 01:14:18,559
Thank you.

964
01:14:21,427 --> 01:14:23,947
Paul McCartney's calling to see you.

965
01:14:24,934 --> 01:14:26,489
He's on his way now.

966
01:14:27,131 --> 01:14:28,561
- Here?
- Yeah.

967
01:14:30,428 --> 01:14:31,416
Shit.

968
01:14:35,923 --> 01:14:37,445
- Was that him?
- No, no.

969
01:14:37,521 --> 01:14:40,815
Someone more cultured.
The chauffeur, I think.

970
01:14:41,486 --> 01:14:43,846
- Did you tell him the address?
- He knew the address.

971
01:14:43,916 --> 01:14:46,177
I wish I'd known. This
place is like a pigsty.

972
01:14:46,248 --> 01:14:47,576
He won't mind. He's used to it.

973
01:14:47,647 --> 01:14:49,803
He's an ordinary working-class boy.
They all are.

974
01:14:49,877 --> 01:14:52,637
He's the nicest, though.
I've always liked him.

975
01:14:52,710 --> 01:14:55,502
The others are more instinctive.

976
01:14:57,171 --> 01:15:00,624
I won't sulk. Just introduce me.

977
01:15:00,703 --> 01:15:03,494
Say who I am, then I'll make myself scarce.

978
01:15:07,696 --> 01:15:10,751
This is what it must be like
when one is about to meet the Queen.

979
01:15:10,826 --> 01:15:12,347
Except, when one meets the Queen...

980
01:15:12,425 --> 01:15:16,046
one normally hasn't threatened
to ram one's typewriter up her ass.

981
01:15:30,108 --> 01:15:31,437
Mr. Orton?

982
01:15:32,274 --> 01:15:34,068
I'm his personal assistant.

983
01:15:41,523 --> 01:15:43,679
He's waiting for you in the car.

984
01:16:31,745 --> 01:16:32,836
Joe!

985
01:16:43,436 --> 01:16:45,730
- That was Paul McCartney.
- Was it?

986
01:16:46,100 --> 01:16:48,655
Kenneth, you are going to have
some memories.

987
01:17:39,585 --> 01:17:43,207
<i>So Ken didn't get to the awards ceremony,
and I did.</i>

988
01:17:43,382 --> 01:17:46,902
<i>I give you the award
on behalf of the Metropolitan Police...</i>

989
01:17:48,045 --> 01:17:51,099
<i>At moments of triumph,
men can do without their wives.</i>

990
01:17:51,176 --> 01:17:52,505
<i>They cramp our style.</i>

991
01:17:52,574 --> 01:17:55,561
<i>- But sharing is what wives want.
- Right.</i>

992
01:17:55,705 --> 01:17:58,295
<i>And Ken was a coach as well as a wife.</i>

993
01:17:58,370 --> 01:17:59,594
<i>Poor Ken.</i>

994
01:18:01,768 --> 01:18:03,459
<i>Still, it was a popular win.</i>

995
01:18:03,532 --> 01:18:07,460
<i>Joe was young, the play was naughty.
It all seemed very bold.</i>

996
01:18:07,762 --> 01:18:10,090
<i>My plays are about getting away with it...</i>

997
01:18:10,160 --> 01:18:12,349
<i>and the ones who get away with it
are the guilty.</i>

998
01:18:12,423 --> 01:18:14,944
<i>It's the innocents who get it in the neck.</i>

999
01:18:15,505 --> 01:18:18,332
<i>But that all seems pretty
true to life to me.</i>

1000
01:18:18,402 --> 01:18:19,990
<i>Not a fantasy at all.</i>

1001
01:18:20,600 --> 01:18:23,654
<i>I've got away with it so far...</i>

1002
01:18:24,596 --> 01:18:26,493
<i>and I'm going to go on.</i>

1003
01:18:26,928 --> 01:18:28,223
<i>Thank you.</i>

1004
01:18:32,923 --> 01:18:35,512
- Shall I drop you?
- Actually, the 24 is handier.

1005
01:18:35,586 --> 01:18:38,879
- Why, where are you going?
- Just going on somewhere.

1006
01:18:39,882 --> 01:18:42,006
- Congratulations again.
- Thank you.

1007
01:21:39,773 --> 01:21:41,238
What did you say?

1008
01:21:42,572 --> 01:21:45,606
- Did you say anything?
- Nothing.

1009
01:21:45,938 --> 01:21:47,063
You know me.

1010
01:21:48,038 --> 01:21:49,128
Thank you.

1011
01:21:49,338 --> 01:21:50,802
Various people...

1012
01:21:52,336 --> 01:21:53,496
kissed me.

1013
01:21:57,036 --> 01:21:58,696
You should pack.

1014
01:22:02,303 --> 01:22:04,666
- Do you read my diary?
- No.

1015
01:22:05,103 --> 01:22:06,194
Why?

1016
01:22:07,636 --> 01:22:09,726
Maybe you'd like me a bit less.

1017
01:22:10,569 --> 01:22:12,058
Should I take my typewriter?

1018
01:22:12,135 --> 01:22:14,897
- No, this is a holiday.
- Oh, just in case.

1019
01:23:40,628 --> 01:23:43,355
Which one do you want?
Abbott or Costello?

1020
01:23:43,627 --> 01:23:45,116
I don't mind.

1021
01:23:45,493 --> 01:23:47,356
Which one do you think likes me?

1022
01:23:47,428 --> 01:23:49,721
I'm not sure liking comes into it.

1023
01:23:56,593 --> 01:23:59,058
So your sister's husband works in Epsom?

1024
01:23:59,293 --> 01:24:00,849
Epsom, yes.

1025
01:24:02,658 --> 01:24:03,954
In a hotel?

1026
01:24:04,359 --> 01:24:05,791
Yes. Waiter.

1027
01:24:06,893 --> 01:24:08,551
Epsom's in Surrey...

1028
01:24:09,359 --> 01:24:10,847
near London.

1029
01:24:28,756 --> 01:24:31,586
And to think there's another two
coming round at 7:00.

1030
01:24:31,656 --> 01:24:33,815
My life's beginning to
run to a timetable...

1031
01:24:33,890 --> 01:24:36,447
that no member of the royal family
would tolerate.

1032
01:24:36,956 --> 01:24:39,047
- I'm improving.
- You are.

1033
01:24:39,489 --> 01:24:43,251
Having it sucked regularly
is turning you back into a human being.

1034
01:24:44,556 --> 01:24:47,078
Who is this? No one knows we're here.

1035
01:24:47,156 --> 01:24:50,144
I gave the Beatles' office the number.
Just in case.

1036
01:24:51,721 --> 01:24:53,449
It's Brian Epstein.

1037
01:24:56,821 --> 01:24:59,878
I was very impressed
with your screenplay, Joe.

1038
01:25:00,120 --> 01:25:03,086
But some areas I'm not sure
I've understood correctly...

1039
01:25:03,154 --> 01:25:05,177
and perhaps you could
talk me through those?

1040
01:25:05,254 --> 01:25:06,584
<i>Delighted.</i>

1041
01:25:07,186 --> 01:25:11,176
The Beatles are all pursuing
the same girl, right?

1042
01:25:11,553 --> 01:25:12,541
<i>Yeah.</i>

1043
01:25:12,686 --> 01:25:14,344
Well, maybe.

1044
01:25:14,752 --> 01:25:17,343
Knowing the boys as I do,
I would say that was...

1045
01:25:17,420 --> 01:25:18,783
well, iffy.

1046
01:25:19,186 --> 01:25:20,208
However...

1047
01:25:20,451 --> 01:25:22,917
<i>it's on Page 53...</i>

1048
01:25:23,285 --> 01:25:27,047
<i>Scene 86, when we definitely
seem to kiss reality goodbye.</i>

1049
01:25:27,451 --> 01:25:29,974
<i>Cut to the boys in bed with Susan.</i>

1050
01:25:30,051 --> 01:25:33,847
One of them is smoking a joint.
He passes it around.

1051
01:25:34,451 --> 01:25:37,905
Two points there, Joe.
One, these boys do not take drugs.

1052
01:25:38,584 --> 01:25:42,107
<i>They never have taken drugs
and they never will take drugs.</i>

1053
01:25:42,184 --> 01:25:43,842
It's only a joint.

1054
01:25:44,917 --> 01:25:48,780
Second point.
If the boys are all in bed with Susan...

1055
01:25:48,849 --> 01:25:52,839
this means, as I understand it,
that they are all in bed with each other.

1056
01:25:54,815 --> 01:25:56,213
No, no, no.

1057
01:25:58,682 --> 01:25:59,670
<i>Why?</i>

1058
01:25:59,948 --> 01:26:03,176
Why? Because these are
normal, healthy boys.

1059
01:26:03,848 --> 01:26:05,677
I take it they all sleep together.

1060
01:26:06,215 --> 01:26:07,680
They do not.

1061
01:26:07,747 --> 01:26:09,577
But they're all very pretty.

1062
01:26:10,082 --> 01:26:12,513
I imagined they just had a good time.

1063
01:26:13,014 --> 01:26:16,537
Sang, smoked, fucked everything in sight,
including each other.

1064
01:26:17,114 --> 01:26:19,409
I thought that was what success meant.

1065
01:26:20,379 --> 01:26:22,470
<i>Mr. Orton, success means...</i>

1066
01:26:23,013 --> 01:26:25,741
It means a respect for the public.

1067
01:26:26,113 --> 01:26:29,045
Besides, one of the boys
is happily married.

1068
01:26:29,745 --> 01:26:31,541
I'm sorry, Mr. Orton.

1069
01:26:31,746 --> 01:26:33,904
I hope you're having a pleasant vacation.

1070
01:27:58,638 --> 01:28:00,331
Why do you have to work?

1071
01:28:01,637 --> 01:28:03,126
Enjoy yourself.

1072
01:28:04,104 --> 01:28:05,763
I am enjoying myself.

1073
01:28:06,804 --> 01:28:09,565
- Listen to this.
- Not now. I don't want to.

1074
01:28:09,904 --> 01:28:11,029
Not here.

1075
01:28:14,003 --> 01:28:16,901
We'll get enough of this
when we get back to London.

1076
01:28:21,003 --> 01:28:22,196
Stop it.

1077
01:28:22,969 --> 01:28:24,163
Piss off.

1078
01:28:28,736 --> 01:28:30,394
Stupid nutter!

1079
01:28:33,235 --> 01:28:35,564
When we get back, we're finished.
This is the end.

1080
01:28:35,634 --> 01:28:37,760
Why don't you add,
"I'm going back to Mother"?

1081
01:28:37,835 --> 01:28:41,494
That's the kind of line
that makes your plays ultimately worthless.

1082
01:28:43,068 --> 01:28:45,033
He's waiting to be paid.

1083
01:28:48,900 --> 01:28:50,958
Actually, he's rather sweet.

1084
01:28:52,299 --> 01:28:53,822
I think I'll retire.

1085
01:28:54,266 --> 01:28:55,789
Lick my wounds...

1086
01:28:56,666 --> 01:28:58,427
or have them licked for me.

1087
01:29:16,399 --> 01:29:19,761
You might at least open a window.
The place stinks.

1088
01:29:31,296 --> 01:29:32,727
That's good.

1089
01:29:33,430 --> 01:29:36,090
Peggy sold the Beatles script
to someone else.

1090
01:29:36,163 --> 01:29:38,594
I get paid twice over, apparently.

1091
01:29:40,095 --> 01:29:42,485
<i>The Observer would like to interview me.</i>

1092
01:29:43,763 --> 01:29:47,559
<i>And Vogue wonders if I'd be interested
in modeling some clothes.</i>

1093
01:29:48,595 --> 01:29:50,118
So much for the holiday.

1094
01:29:50,194 --> 01:29:51,989
- What?
- I take you away for four weeks...

1095
01:29:52,061 --> 01:29:54,584
you come back,
still the same jealous bitch as before.

1096
01:29:54,661 --> 01:29:57,955
Have you got them out?
Yes, you have. I know you, come on.

1097
01:29:58,494 --> 01:30:00,551
Come on, do your act.

1098
01:30:00,627 --> 01:30:02,355
- No!
- Come on, do your act.

1099
01:30:03,826 --> 01:30:05,621
How many is it, the fatal dose?

1100
01:30:05,693 --> 01:30:07,216
Twelve, is it?

1101
01:30:09,560 --> 01:30:11,287
One, two...

1102
01:30:11,359 --> 01:30:13,791
Here you are. Fetch.

1103
01:30:14,060 --> 01:30:16,685
And another. Yeah, and another.

1104
01:30:16,760 --> 01:30:17,850
Here.

1105
01:30:18,625 --> 01:30:20,318
- Answer that.
- No.

1106
01:30:20,392 --> 01:30:21,756
Answer it.

1107
01:30:27,858 --> 01:30:28,950
Hello?

1108
01:30:30,025 --> 01:30:31,513
Hello, Leonie.

1109
01:30:32,924 --> 01:30:34,981
Yes, it was very nice. Thank you.

1110
01:30:36,190 --> 01:30:37,416
Hold on.

1111
01:30:44,757 --> 01:30:45,983
Hello.

1112
01:30:51,289 --> 01:30:52,811
When was this?

1113
01:30:54,790 --> 01:30:57,755
Does that mean
there will have to be a funeral?

1114
01:31:01,122 --> 01:31:02,214
Shit.

1115
01:31:03,488 --> 01:31:05,716
I'll come up. Okay.

1116
01:31:06,755 --> 01:31:07,812
Bye.

1117
01:31:11,720 --> 01:31:14,050
- My mother's dead.
- Oh, Joe.

1118
01:31:18,687 --> 01:31:20,448
I know what it's like.

1119
01:31:23,219 --> 01:31:25,846
My whole life changed
when my mother died.

1120
01:31:26,619 --> 01:31:28,085
I'm so sorry.

1121
01:31:30,285 --> 01:31:31,512
I'm not.

1122
01:31:38,618 --> 01:31:41,016
And while I'm away, see a doctor.

1123
01:31:42,019 --> 01:31:44,712
A proper doctor. You're sick.

1124
01:32:02,583 --> 01:32:03,605
Hello, duck.

1125
01:32:22,547 --> 01:32:23,910
Your mother's ready now...

1126
01:32:23,981 --> 01:32:26,879
if you'd like to come in
and pay your respects.

1127
01:32:46,413 --> 01:32:49,173
I think father first.

1128
01:32:56,178 --> 01:32:58,643
Stop it, Joe. I don't want to laugh.

1129
01:32:58,711 --> 01:33:00,574
I didn't know her. I don't want to laugh.

1130
01:33:00,644 --> 01:33:03,837
I still don't know
why you want to go calling yourself Joe.

1131
01:33:03,910 --> 01:33:05,739
John's a much classier name.

1132
01:33:18,343 --> 01:33:20,467
You've left her glasses off.

1133
01:33:21,676 --> 01:33:24,540
Yes. You'll find that's normal procedure.

1134
01:33:25,309 --> 01:33:28,206
Generally speaking, people prefer it.

1135
01:33:31,642 --> 01:33:33,870
What's happened to her teeth?

1136
01:33:35,241 --> 01:33:37,104
Mislaid, apparently.

1137
01:33:38,942 --> 01:33:40,100
Shame.

1138
01:33:40,975 --> 01:33:43,065
She was proud of her teeth.

1139
01:34:17,671 --> 01:34:19,637
Oh, God. Chuck them away.

1140
01:34:20,171 --> 01:34:22,533
I want something to remember her by.

1141
01:34:22,603 --> 01:34:25,001
You've no feeling at all, do you?

1142
01:34:32,570 --> 01:34:34,831
I've started night school now.

1143
01:34:36,403 --> 01:34:38,425
Modern English Literature.

1144
01:34:41,135 --> 01:34:43,862
It's amazing how many writers are queer.

1145
01:34:47,167 --> 01:34:49,361
Do you think Mom's why you like lads?

1146
01:34:50,535 --> 01:34:52,057
Lay off.

1147
01:34:55,634 --> 01:34:58,297
You do look at lads. I've seen you.

1148
01:35:02,667 --> 01:35:05,259
I've had a better time than they had.

1149
01:35:07,033 --> 01:35:08,294
Sexually.

1150
01:35:10,366 --> 01:35:12,265
We had no time at all.

1151
01:35:16,766 --> 01:35:19,357
There must have been times...

1152
01:35:20,331 --> 01:35:22,093
when you were happy.

1153
01:35:22,299 --> 01:35:23,356
Yes.

1154
01:35:25,632 --> 01:35:26,858
Several.

1155
01:35:34,197 --> 01:35:36,925
You kiss now. You never used to kiss.

1156
01:35:37,530 --> 01:35:39,120
That's London.

1157
01:35:46,629 --> 01:35:48,219
I never told you...

1158
01:35:48,763 --> 01:35:50,558
I met Paul McCartney.

1159
01:36:40,925 --> 01:36:43,084
Thought you were a bobby at first.

1160
01:36:43,258 --> 01:36:45,383
- Black tie.
- A funeral.

1161
01:36:46,658 --> 01:36:49,180
- Who died?
- My mother and two sisters.

1162
01:36:49,291 --> 01:36:52,019
Dead in the fire that consumed our home.

1163
01:36:52,390 --> 01:36:54,720
- You must be heartbroken.
- I am.

1164
01:36:55,690 --> 01:36:57,384
Handle my balls.

1165
01:37:06,522 --> 01:37:09,216
Do you need any assistance
in stripping the corpse?

1166
01:37:09,290 --> 01:37:12,880
I do not need a lesson in anatomy.
I was a trained nurse.

1167
01:37:13,855 --> 01:37:16,344
I am now removing her underclothes.

1168
01:37:16,422 --> 01:37:18,819
Please. You forget, this was my mother.

1169
01:37:18,888 --> 01:37:21,012
- I'm sorry.
- What about?

1170
01:37:21,454 --> 01:37:22,853
Your mother.

1171
01:37:23,021 --> 01:37:24,681
Hand me the prop teeth.

1172
01:37:25,821 --> 01:37:27,310
Don't mess about. I'm on.

1173
01:37:27,388 --> 01:37:30,217
Use these instead. They were my mother's.

1174
01:37:31,021 --> 01:37:32,713
Jesus Christ!

1175
01:37:33,886 --> 01:37:35,511
Is there anything else?

1176
01:37:36,753 --> 01:37:38,651
Is there anything else?

1177
01:37:39,486 --> 01:37:40,816
Her teeth.

1178
01:37:43,553 --> 01:37:46,211
<i>I don't know what to say about the end.</i>

1179
01:37:46,385 --> 01:37:48,317
<i>It wasn't a natural act.</i>

1180
01:37:48,386 --> 01:37:50,011
<i>Well, obviously.</i>

1181
01:37:50,452 --> 01:37:53,781
<i>I didn't mean that.
These things happen, that's all.</i>

1182
01:37:53,851 --> 01:37:57,181
I have an appointment with the psychiatrist
at 10:00 tomorrow.

1183
01:37:57,251 --> 01:37:58,307
Yes.

1184
01:37:58,918 --> 01:38:01,407
Thank you for all the trouble you've taken.

1185
01:38:02,184 --> 01:38:04,378
You don't want a psychiatrist.

1186
01:38:04,817 --> 01:38:07,283
It's this room. You've lived here too long.

1187
01:38:07,351 --> 01:38:08,442
So?

1188
01:38:08,517 --> 01:38:11,243
I keep finding places.
You won't even go look.

1189
01:38:11,316 --> 01:38:14,749
"Two bedrooms, two reception rooms,
bathroom, and patio.

1190
01:38:14,817 --> 01:38:17,907
"This well-proportioned accommodation
can be easily maintained...

1191
01:38:17,982 --> 01:38:20,847
"with minimum effort,
leaving more time for leisure pursuits. "

1192
01:38:20,916 --> 01:38:22,143
- Where?
- East Croydon.

1193
01:38:22,283 --> 01:38:23,476
I won't live in East Croydon.

1194
01:38:23,550 --> 01:38:26,572
You're so unadventurous.
I love the country.

1195
01:38:26,682 --> 01:38:28,773
It'll be nice
to see the occasional green field.

1196
01:38:28,849 --> 01:38:30,973
- East Croydon?
- Anywhere! Not you.

1197
01:38:31,048 --> 01:38:34,378
You'd be having a troll up and down
till your balls dropped off.

1198
01:38:34,449 --> 01:38:36,381
What did the doctor say?

1199
01:38:40,314 --> 01:38:42,836
He's already talking about hospital.

1200
01:38:43,681 --> 01:38:46,271
I haven't even seen the psychiatrist.

1201
01:38:48,947 --> 01:38:51,105
Still, he's a very good doctor.

1202
01:38:54,513 --> 01:38:56,672
He treats cabinet ministers.

1203
01:39:13,078 --> 01:39:15,271
What happens if we split up?

1204
01:39:15,478 --> 01:39:18,204
How would that help me?
We're talking about me.

1205
01:39:18,544 --> 01:39:19,874
We can't go on like this.

1206
01:39:19,944 --> 01:39:21,637
I've given you everything. I made you.

1207
01:39:21,711 --> 01:39:23,938
Listen to the dialogue, dear.

1208
01:39:24,243 --> 01:39:26,708
I'm not Eliza fucking Doolittle.
I made myself.

1209
01:39:26,776 --> 01:39:28,765
- Those are my books.
- I'd see you all right.

1210
01:39:28,843 --> 01:39:31,331
- I taught you.
- I taught you, too.

1211
01:39:31,409 --> 01:39:34,137
What? How to go into a public lavatory?

1212
01:39:35,410 --> 01:39:36,739
Anyway...

1213
01:39:37,109 --> 01:39:40,166
if it hadn't been you,
it would have been someone else.

1214
01:39:41,276 --> 01:39:42,969
- Sleep on it.
- How?

1215
01:39:43,874 --> 01:39:45,840
I could give you a wank.

1216
01:39:46,909 --> 01:39:48,807
- What do you want?
- Joe.

1217
01:39:50,475 --> 01:39:51,531
John.

1218
01:39:51,607 --> 01:39:52,664
I'm not John.

1219
01:39:53,140 --> 01:39:54,539
John's dead.

1220
01:39:57,174 --> 01:40:00,731
If you change your mind about the wank,
don't wake me up.

1221
01:40:14,673 --> 01:40:16,796
I don't understand my life.

1222
01:40:19,072 --> 01:40:20,868
I was an only child.

1223
01:40:22,305 --> 01:40:24,203
I lost both my parents.

1224
01:40:25,738 --> 01:40:28,431
By the time I was 20, I was going bald.

1225
01:40:29,870 --> 01:40:31,530
I'm a homosexual.

1226
01:40:34,172 --> 01:40:36,659
In the way of circumstances
and background...

1227
01:40:36,736 --> 01:40:39,567
I had everything
an artist could possibly want.

1228
01:40:41,404 --> 01:40:43,699
It was practically a blueprint.

1229
01:40:45,502 --> 01:40:48,697
I was programmed to be a novelist
or a playwright.

1230
01:40:50,636 --> 01:40:53,102
But I'm not and you are.

1231
01:40:54,502 --> 01:40:55,593
Joe?

1232
01:40:58,569 --> 01:41:01,000
You do everything better than me!

1233
01:41:01,935 --> 01:41:04,197
You even sleep better than me!

1234
01:41:33,699 --> 01:41:35,664
I should have used this.

1235
01:41:36,632 --> 01:41:38,222
More theatrical.

1236
01:41:39,598 --> 01:41:42,256
But you'd have spotted that straight away.

1237
01:42:14,629 --> 01:42:16,026
I loved him.

1238
01:42:17,494 --> 01:42:19,393
I must have loved him.

1239
01:42:20,862 --> 01:42:22,827
I chose him to kill me.

1240
01:43:20,222 --> 01:43:22,780
I was scheduled to pick him up at 12:00.

1241
01:43:22,855 --> 01:43:24,378
A private lunch.

1242
01:43:25,556 --> 01:43:28,282
He leads an increasingly glamorous life.

1243
01:43:34,187 --> 01:43:35,983
Is he a heavy sleeper?

1244
01:43:36,055 --> 01:43:38,749
I know nothing about his personal life.

1245
01:43:39,354 --> 01:43:42,411
Idle curiosity has never been
my strong point.

1246
01:43:43,721 --> 01:43:46,084
Try looking through the letterbox.

1247
01:43:50,220 --> 01:43:51,617
Hello, Mr. Orton.

1248
01:43:52,286 --> 01:43:56,718
Personally, I've driven in the firm's car,
but different destinations.

1249
01:43:58,720 --> 01:44:00,877
Has the other got a bald head?

1250
01:44:01,519 --> 01:44:03,951
No, he wears a wig.

1251
01:44:08,285 --> 01:44:10,376
Can you break down this door?

1252
01:44:10,718 --> 01:44:12,014
Clifford!

1253
01:44:12,352 --> 01:44:14,442
Can we break down the door?

1254
01:44:14,518 --> 01:44:16,007
Certainly not.

1255
01:44:16,117 --> 01:44:19,174
If there's damage to be
done, call the police.

1256
01:44:19,618 --> 01:44:20,981
That's their job.

1257
01:44:31,050 --> 01:44:34,812
If he hadn't murdered Joe,
nobody would ever have known his name.

1258
01:44:34,882 --> 01:44:36,712
Ken was the first wife.

1259
01:44:37,383 --> 01:44:39,542
Did all the work and the
waiting, and then...

1260
01:44:43,482 --> 01:44:46,537
First wives don't usually
beat their husbands' heads in.

1261
01:44:46,614 --> 01:44:48,774
No, though why, I can't think.

1262
01:44:49,348 --> 01:44:52,246
So what does that make you?
The second wife?

1263
01:44:52,748 --> 01:44:54,645
Better than that, dear.

1264
01:44:55,614 --> 01:44:56,739
The widow.

1265
01:45:08,012 --> 01:45:09,808
<i>There were two ceremonies.</i>

1266
01:45:09,880 --> 01:45:13,311
<i>Joe's at Golders Green.
Everybody there. House full.</i>

1267
01:45:14,046 --> 01:45:17,035
<i>Ken's at Enfield.
You couldn't give tickets away.</i>

1268
01:45:17,112 --> 01:45:18,203
<i>Three people.</i>

1269
01:45:18,279 --> 01:45:19,608
<i>That's sad.</i>

1270
01:45:20,978 --> 01:45:22,069
<i>Well...</i>

1271
01:45:23,479 --> 01:45:26,000
<i>they fetched up together at the end.</i>

1272
01:45:28,011 --> 01:45:30,443
Strictly speaking,
we would have preferred it...

1273
01:45:30,512 --> 01:45:33,773
if both the deceased
had been cremated on the premises.

1274
01:45:33,844 --> 01:45:37,707
Intermingling would then have been
carried out by experienced personnel...

1275
01:45:37,777 --> 01:45:39,935
under controlled conditions.

1276
01:45:52,409 --> 01:45:55,967
I think I'm putting in more of Joe
than I am of Kenneth.

1277
01:45:58,442 --> 01:46:00,964
It's a gesture, dear, not a recipe.

1278
01:46:08,841 --> 01:46:12,124
I hope nobody gets to hear
about this in Leicester.

1279
01:46:13,305 --> 01:46:19,153
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