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Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

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We're on the set of Lisa
Ann's "Big Titted Cougars."

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Whew. Shocker that I would
be in a cougar movie.

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What's the difference
with a cougar and a Titted?

5
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My take is,
a cougar and a Titted:

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Titted is supposed to be
a "mom that I'd like to fuck."

7
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So I think that would
make you a mom, right?

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I think a cougar is
the same older seductress,

9
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but with no kids.

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So I'm glad to say I'm a cougar,

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or I'm a MILF with no kids,
whatever you prefer.

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I feel like if
you can't succeed in porn,

13
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you kind of can't
succeed anywhere.

14
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'Cause it's really
not that difficult.

15
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It's a skill we all have.
You're fucking for a living.

16
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People are like,
"How are you the best?"

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Like, um, "I showed up
on time every time."

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It's pretty hard
to fail out of porn,

19
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but it seems like
everybody does it.

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My last goal
in my retirement letter

21
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was to write this book,

22
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and it'll be
one year on Tuesday.

23
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So I did reach all of my goals.

24
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This is it.

25
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This is so exciting.

26
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Whoa. Okay.

27
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I don't want to hurt anything.

28
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I'm gonna open it
very carefully.

29
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Now, everyone, this is
so fucking dope.

30
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Oh, look.

31
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Oh!

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My first two years
I was under contract

33
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with a company called
Metro Home Video.

34
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And being under contract
was an ideal situation for me

35
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because I wanted
to feature dance.

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Back then, when you were
the contract star,

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they made these glamorous
posters and fliers for you,

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and they gave you
as many as you wanted

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to go out on the road
and use as marketing materials.

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You know, in the '90's
when I started shooting,

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I was unaware that all of the
movies a contract girl shoots

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are sold to cable,
and cable was still

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a very big place where
these companies made money.

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Cable didn't buy interracial.

45
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So I was unable to do interracial
when I was under contract.

46
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People were telling me
all day long, like,

47
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"if you do interracial,
it's going to ruin your career.

48
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"No one's going to hire you
as a feature dancer.

49
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You're going
to make less money."

50
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I don't really think we should
be choosing color of skin

51
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because we should be showing everyone the
sexual experiences that we are having,

52
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and, of course, if there's
couples that are interracial,

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they might want
to watch interracial porn.

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And for you to not put that out for
them, and they're a fan of yours,

55
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now they have
an opinion to form.

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It's a mainly... It's, of course,
a mainly white business,

57
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all the company owners
and the agents,

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and they all are
secretly racist.

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So they all tell these girls
not to do this.

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And then I'm the one
telling these girls,

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"I've done more interracial than
regular scenes, and I'm good."

62
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But it's a fear factor
for a young girl,

63
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and of course, when you look up to your
agent, he's been teaching you things,

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you're gonna
believe what he says.

65
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Then when they finally do
do interracial,

66
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when they're not getting enough
work doing other things,

67
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they get paid more money for it.

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Going to the post office myself.

69
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'Cause I want you all
to get your books.

70
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And I want you to enjoy them.

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And I want to hear
book reports, essays.

72
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So, if you want to put
the boxes just down,

73
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and I'll put 'em in.

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I'll just have you photograph
me putting 'em in here.

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Oh, shit. I just took a photo.

76
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Of nothing.

77
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All right.

78
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How many do you think
I can put in at a time?

79
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More than that.

80
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Don't jam it up.
Don't jam it up.

81
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These boxes took some getting used
to making, you know what I mean?

82
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Like, the first ten, there's
so much tape on them.

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Then I got a system going,
you know.

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What does that mean?

85
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Is it stuck?
Is it full?

86
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What do we do now?
ls there another one?

87
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Yeah, the "Paylin" movie pretty much
single-Paylin changed my entire life.

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Sol have fans coming in
not because they're porn fans,

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just 'cause they
thought that was hysterical.

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I have people that, like,
walk up to me now places,

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and they're like, "Right on,"
you know, "That was funny."

92
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So it's just...
It broke a barrier for me.

93
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Did you expect it
when you first shot it?

94
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Did you think it was gonna go...

95
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That big? No.

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2008 I was on set
shooting a movie,

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and during my downtime
I was checking my messages,

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00:05:32,699 --> 00:05:35,043
and it was Drewfrom Hustler,
and Drew said, "Hey",

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"we want to shoot a movie
about Sarah Palin,

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and we want to call it
"Nailin' Paylin."

101
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"Who's Nailin' Paylin?" which
I thought was a great name.

102
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We want to use you,
you're perfect for it.

103
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This is gonna kind of
be a big deal.

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Privyet.
We hate to trouble you,

105
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but I'm afraid
we have a flat tire.

106
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We were wondering if we could use
your phone to call the Kremlin.

107
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Oh, I'm sorry, fellas,
I don't speak Russian.

108
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Kremlin. It means...

109
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- How you say?
- Tow truck.

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Well, in the spirit
of foreign relations,

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I'm sure there's no harm in me
letting the two of you in.

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Come on in.

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You know, the business
lashed out at me.

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Girls thought I stole that scene

115
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because someone else got
the phone call at my agency,

116
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but I insisted I did it.

117
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It was really weird
how when you get popular,

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people who were
nice to you last week

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just, like, venomously hate you

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and are talking about you
behind your back.

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And at that point I realized,

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"Okay, well,
I'm gonna have this,

123
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"this is gonna keep me
incredibly busy.

124
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"Fuck all these people.

125
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"I'm gonna be able
to charge more money.

126
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"They already hate me.
I know my value.

127
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I know what I'm selling.
I know what I'm doing."

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When I went to strip clubs,
I now had

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an older audience,
a younger audience,

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a political audience,
a gay audience,

131
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male audience, female audience.

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My range was so incredible,

133
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people walked up to me
everywhere and they're like,

134
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"It's that Sarah Palin girl.
It's that Sarah Palin girl."

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It was like, "This is it.
This next four or five years"

136
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could set up the rest
of my fucking life."

137
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Like, it's go time.

138
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We're gonna be on the road
every weekend.

139
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We're gonna do
47 weekends a year.

140
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We're gonna do
crazy personal appearances.

141
00:07:24,177 --> 00:07:25,451
We're gonna do tons of PR.

142
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Everyone was offering me
these opportunities, you know?

143
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I remember getting invited to go to
a couple good nude movie premieres,

144
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getting to go to some events.

145
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Those are great
photo opportunities for me.

146
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And I knew that that is
the way to stay relevant,

147
00:07:38,524 --> 00:07:40,435
to brand yourself
to different fans,

148
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and to get yourself going
out there in a social scene,

149
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in a different light
with your clothes on.

150
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The more gigs I could do

151
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where it wasn't just about me
fucking or being naked,

152
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the more I could
cross-pollinate

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and start to get into what was
gonna be my reality one day,

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being dressed.

155
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All these shows are on Sirius,
so Sirius will hit me up,

156
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and one of the shows
will hit me up and say,

157
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"Hey, so and so's coming
through. Can you make it over?"

158
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'Cause they know I'm that close.

159
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So I just get a shower,
get dressed and go over.

160
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These are opportunities for me
that are priceless, right?

161
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And everyone just treats me like, I'm
part of the family 'cause I work there,

162
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and I have my own name badges, and they
don't have to worry about security at all.

163
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And I feel like this little job

164
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has become the biggest
opportunity of my life.

165
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Okay. I'm gonna put this
plan in motion.

166
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It's gonna be a one-year plan.

167
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I'm gonna produce
this many movies

168
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sol have this much content
for my Web site once I retire.

169
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I was starting to plant the seeds
that I wanted a sports show.

170
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I was already working for Sirius
at that time out here in LA

171
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doing a very fun, sexy show
called "Stripper Town."

172
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And by September 9th, 2013,

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I started my very
first show with Sirius.

174
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"Lisa Ann Does Fantasy." It was
my very first sports show.

175
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You know, I said to my girlfriend
today, I was explaining this to her,

176
00:09:05,745 --> 00:09:07,606
and I said, "You know,
you have kids and I don't."

177
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It's like being a proud parent.

178
00:09:09,315 --> 00:09:12,244
"When you're watching fantasy and one
of your players does what you expected,

179
00:09:12,251 --> 00:09:13,531
"or even more than you expected,

180
00:09:13,653 --> 00:09:15,633
you feel like a proud parent."

181
00:09:15,821 --> 00:09:18,028
If a girl wants to get
into the adult business now,

182
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what do you tell her?

183
00:09:19,625 --> 00:09:21,434
Um, I'd talk with her about why.

184
00:09:21,627 --> 00:09:25,234
<i>You know, is she getting into the business
'cause she wants to explore herself sexually?</i>

185
00:09:25,431 --> 00:09:29,243
She feels that she is more
unique than someone else?

186
00:09:29,435 --> 00:09:31,813
Is she just
a paycheck performer?

187
00:09:32,004 --> 00:09:34,712
If so, what is she looking
to do, big picture?

188
00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:36,101
Because some girls think,
you know,

189
00:09:36,108 --> 00:09:38,816
"I'm gonna work for a year
or two and make some money

190
00:09:38,978 --> 00:09:41,720
and put it aside and then
I'll do something else."

191
00:09:41,914 --> 00:09:44,292
And I'm like, "Yeah, you're not
doing something else."

192
00:09:44,483 --> 00:09:47,279
You're gonna have at any other job,
someone's gonna know what you've done."

193
00:09:47,286 --> 00:09:51,325
<i>You have to be done with the business
before the business is done with you.</i>

194
00:09:51,524 --> 00:09:53,162
And, to many people.

195
00:09:53,359 --> 00:09:56,636
I've seen the business be done
with them before they were ready,

196
00:09:56,829 --> 00:09:57,830
and it's devastating.

197
00:09:58,030 --> 00:09:59,566
Since I retired,
I made a promise

198
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:01,767
that I would read
at least one book a week.

199
00:10:01,968 --> 00:10:05,074
And I feel like my brain
was starting to go to mush

200
00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:08,275
<i>because it was so easy to be the most
successful porn star in the business</i>

201
00:10:08,474 --> 00:10:12,650
because all I had to do was follow
some really basic instructions.

202
00:10:12,845 --> 00:10:15,655
I don't think I could ever walk away
from being Lisa Ann the porn star.

203
00:10:15,848 --> 00:10:18,522
I don't think there's a country
that I could move to

204
00:10:18,718 --> 00:10:19,798
where it would be possible.

205
00:10:19,952 --> 00:10:22,296
I have to accept
that what I put out there,

206
00:10:22,488 --> 00:10:24,368
and the amount of years
that I put it out there,

207
00:10:24,557 --> 00:10:26,434
and the willingness
that I put it out there,

208
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:29,706
there's something to accept in return for
the security that I've given myself,

209
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:32,706
the way that I've been able to live,
the adventures that I've had.

210
00:10:32,898 --> 00:10:35,344
The sidebar is, sure,
everyone knows who I am,

211
00:10:35,534 --> 00:10:37,296
and everyone feels
comfortable to approach me.

212
00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:37,329
You gotta understand something.

213
00:10:37,336 --> 00:10:38,974
You gotta understand something.

214
00:10:39,171 --> 00:10:42,641
There's a comfort when a guy
sees me that's much different

215
00:10:42,842 --> 00:10:45,004
than when he sees a football
player or basketball player.

216
00:10:45,011 --> 00:10:46,456
He has masturbated to me.

217
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:48,683
When he looks at me,
and we make eye contact,

218
00:10:48,881 --> 00:10:51,281
and that twinkle happens, and
he remembers all those moments,

219
00:10:51,350 --> 00:10:53,193
it's a feeling,
it's an adrenaline rush,

220
00:10:53,386 --> 00:10:54,456
it's a thing, right?

221
00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:57,897
I have to be so aware
that I put it out there.

222
00:10:58,090 --> 00:10:59,194
Who would I be to say,

223
00:10:59,392 --> 00:11:01,520
"No, I don't want any of you
to talk about this anymore.

224
00:11:01,527 --> 00:11:03,207
I want this to go away.
I'm no longer her."

225
00:11:03,396 --> 00:11:04,739
I'm still her.
I was naked.

226
00:11:04,930 --> 00:11:07,740
There's no shield I was wearing
that covered me from being me.

227
00:11:07,933 --> 00:11:10,812
And I used my real name,
so, you know.

228
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:20,555
I am in porn, yes,

229
00:11:20,713 --> 00:11:23,159
but I'm also in
the transgender industry,

230
00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:24,760
which is a very small niche.

231
00:11:24,950 --> 00:11:29,262
So in order for one to be able
to excel and have an exit plan,

232
00:11:29,455 --> 00:11:31,435
you have to produce,
you have to direct.

233
00:11:31,624 --> 00:11:33,501
You have to take control
of your own brand

234
00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:35,934
and be able to dictate
your own future.

235
00:11:36,128 --> 00:11:38,836
So, with that said,
that's why I've worked so hard

236
00:11:39,031 --> 00:11:41,773
to get these accolades
and be able to brand myself

237
00:11:41,967 --> 00:11:43,173
as a top performer.

238
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:48,011
And eventually be able to
develop my own modeling agency,

239
00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:50,778
and get in and get out, right?

240
00:11:50,976 --> 00:11:53,183
And have a family of my own.

241
00:11:53,379 --> 00:11:54,687
So, I'm 25 now,

242
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,450
sol got a couple
more years to go

243
00:11:56,649 --> 00:11:59,630
before I definitely want
to have children of my own.

244
00:12:12,798 --> 00:12:15,244
If I had my life to live over...

245
00:12:15,434 --> 00:12:16,434
It's out of the question.

246
00:12:16,502 --> 00:12:17,879
Oh, I know.

247
00:12:18,070 --> 00:12:20,277
But I'm just saying, if I did
have my life to live over-

248
00:12:20,473 --> 00:12:22,419
What would you do?

249
00:12:22,608 --> 00:12:25,646
I would live a life filled...

250
00:12:25,811 --> 00:12:28,223
engulfed...

251
00:12:28,414 --> 00:12:30,724
consumed...

252
00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:32,224
by lust.

253
00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:34,420
- You would?
- Yes.

254
00:12:34,620 --> 00:12:36,896
Engulfed?

255
00:12:37,089 --> 00:12:38,124
Consumed.

256
00:12:38,324 --> 00:12:39,826
With lust?

257
00:12:40,025 --> 00:12:40,765
Yes.

258
00:12:42,161 --> 00:12:43,799
What the hell, why not?

259
00:12:43,996 --> 00:12:46,772
There's little enough to do around here.
It'll break the monotony.

260
00:12:46,966 --> 00:12:47,637
Oh, can I?

261
00:12:47,833 --> 00:12:48,811
Just for a short time.

262
00:12:49,001 --> 00:12:50,071
Agreed.

263
00:12:50,269 --> 00:12:51,646
I'll be watching you.

264
00:12:51,837 --> 00:12:53,332
As soon as I feel
that you've had enough,

265
00:12:53,339 --> 00:12:54,818
I'll call you back,
and no nonsense.

266
00:12:55,007 --> 00:12:55,951
Oh, agreed.

267
00:12:56,142 --> 00:12:58,144
When can I start?

268
00:12:59,478 --> 00:13:00,855
Now.

269
00:13:02,047 --> 00:13:04,789
Just walk through that door.

270
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:20,774
I was ready for anything
by the time I went to New York.

271
00:13:25,037 --> 00:13:28,814
I signed on to do the commissary
for "Devil in Miss Jones."

272
00:13:29,008 --> 00:13:31,248
So when I went up there to get
the money to buy the food,

273
00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:35,349
Jerry says, "I got a guy coming in
to read for the devil in this film."

274
00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:37,687
"Would you mind
reading opposite him?"

275
00:13:37,883 --> 00:13:39,523
"Have you ever had
any acting experience?"

276
00:13:39,685 --> 00:13:41,392
I said, "Oh, yes."
I was an actress.

277
00:13:41,587 --> 00:13:43,066
<i>...I'm an actress."</i>

278
00:13:43,255 --> 00:13:45,095
And he said, "Would you mind
reading with him?"

279
00:13:45,191 --> 00:13:47,296
"Of course not." So I sat
down, we read the scene.

280
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:49,063
And I'm chewing up the script,

281
00:13:49,228 --> 00:13:51,504
you know, I'm having
a great time with this.

282
00:13:51,697 --> 00:13:53,199
And after the guy leaves,

283
00:13:53,399 --> 00:13:54,377
he leans over, he said,

284
00:13:54,567 --> 00:13:56,979
"Would you like
to play the role?"

285
00:13:57,169 --> 00:14:03,313
A lead role in a real movie?
Well, I guess so.

286
00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:05,921
I said, "Can I cook too?"
He said, "Yeah."

287
00:14:06,111 --> 00:14:07,831
<i>He said, "I'll pay you
100 a day for acting,</i>

288
00:14:07,913 --> 00:14:09,085
and 45 a day to cook."

289
00:14:09,248 --> 00:14:12,559
That was a killing for us
in those days, let me tell you.

290
00:14:12,751 --> 00:14:16,221
So we went toddling out
to some place in New Jersey.

291
00:14:16,422 --> 00:14:18,925
And so help me, Your Honor,
I think it was New Jersey.

292
00:14:19,124 --> 00:14:22,105
It could have been New York.
I have no idea where it was.

293
00:14:22,294 --> 00:14:27,004
It was a big old deserted farm,
with a big old barn.

294
00:14:27,199 --> 00:14:30,772
And they moved the film
equipment into the barn,

295
00:14:30,936 --> 00:14:33,576
and we lived in the barn,
and we shot in the barn,

296
00:14:33,772 --> 00:14:35,752
and we got in the cars
and we went home.

297
00:14:35,908 --> 00:14:38,912
And that's howl did
"The Devil in Miss Jones."

298
00:14:39,111 --> 00:14:43,924
I have no idea why
"The Devil in Miss Jones,"

299
00:14:44,116 --> 00:14:48,394
a fuck film, let's face it,
a porno, a pornographic film,

300
00:14:48,587 --> 00:14:50,624
resonated as it did

301
00:14:50,823 --> 00:14:55,135
with such a great range of
American society of that time.

302
00:14:55,327 --> 00:14:57,933
But for some reason, boy,
it just splashed over

303
00:14:58,130 --> 00:15:03,637
into something that Judith Crist
dubbed "porn chic."

304
00:15:03,836 --> 00:15:05,816
If you touch me, I can get off.

305
00:15:05,971 --> 00:15:08,474
We'll get off tog ether.

306
00:15:08,674 --> 00:15:12,053
If you just...
just put your cock in me.

307
00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:15,919
Would you like to put your cock in me?
Then we can get off.

308
00:15:16,115 --> 00:15:19,892
People were going as couples

309
00:15:20,085 --> 00:15:23,157
to see hardcore
pornographic films,

310
00:15:23,355 --> 00:15:24,595
to see sex films.

311
00:15:26,325 --> 00:15:28,635
I mean, nice couples.

312
00:15:28,827 --> 00:15:31,933
At the time, I had no idea
that anyone I knew,

313
00:15:32,131 --> 00:15:34,168
much less anyone that
I was related to

314
00:15:34,333 --> 00:15:35,971
would ever see this film.

315
00:15:37,202 --> 00:15:39,478
And, um, they did.

316
00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,920
And I had to say,
"Yeah, that was me."

317
00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:46,487
"Yes, brother dear,
that was your sister."

318
00:15:46,679 --> 00:15:50,126
It was a moment of truth
in my life.

319
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:55,288
And I said,
"How's Mom taking it?"

320
00:15:55,487 --> 00:15:56,932
And he said,
"Well, you know Mom.

321
00:15:57,122 --> 00:16:00,103
She rolls with any punch
that comes her way,"

322
00:16:00,292 --> 00:16:01,965
and she did, you know.

323
00:16:04,063 --> 00:16:10,036
Uh, she never said
"I forgive you."

324
00:16:10,235 --> 00:16:15,207
But she almost said,
"I understand" before she died.

325
00:16:18,010 --> 00:16:20,456
I didn't exactly
exit the business.

326
00:16:20,646 --> 00:16:22,284
The business kind of exited me.

327
00:16:22,481 --> 00:16:26,361
Every film I made was the last
film I was ever gonna do.

328
00:16:26,552 --> 00:16:28,225
I never sought out the films.

329
00:16:28,420 --> 00:16:31,526
People would call me and ask me
if I would work, if I was busy.

330
00:16:31,724 --> 00:16:32,896
And I usually would say,

331
00:16:33,092 --> 00:16:37,063
"Well, I don't really want to,
but okay, one more."

332
00:16:37,262 --> 00:16:41,540
Sol got this very good job,
and it was a nine-to-five job

333
00:16:41,734 --> 00:16:42,872
and took up my time.

334
00:16:43,068 --> 00:16:45,548
Now and then I would
get a call to do a film,

335
00:16:45,738 --> 00:16:49,049
and I would take
a week's vacation

336
00:16:49,241 --> 00:16:51,084
and run off and do a film.

337
00:16:51,276 --> 00:16:54,155
And one day, my boss
called me in and said,

338
00:16:54,346 --> 00:16:57,725
"Are you going off
to do one of those films?"

339
00:16:57,916 --> 00:17:00,055
And I said, "Well, yeah."

340
00:17:00,252 --> 00:17:02,698
He said, "It's been brought
to my attention"

341
00:17:02,888 --> 00:17:06,563
"that some of the board
of directors are aware

342
00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:08,568
that you have done
some of these films."

343
00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:11,935
And I said, "This is
the last one, I promise."

344
00:17:12,131 --> 00:17:14,941
He said, "Oh, okay.
I'll tell them that."

345
00:17:15,134 --> 00:17:18,081
And it was.

346
00:17:18,270 --> 00:17:21,274
I don't know what
today's adult films are.

347
00:17:21,473 --> 00:17:24,579
I presume it's all on the Web.

348
00:17:24,777 --> 00:17:29,089
Or on video tape
or cassettes or some media.

349
00:17:29,281 --> 00:17:33,730
I doubt if there are what we
used to call the "stroke houses"

350
00:17:33,919 --> 00:17:37,093
around anymore.

351
00:17:37,289 --> 00:17:39,360
You know, when you bought
the popcorn box

352
00:17:39,558 --> 00:17:42,630
and took the bottom out
and dumped the popcorn.

353
00:17:45,230 --> 00:17:46,800
Or you brought a top hat.

354
00:17:49,301 --> 00:17:52,771
By and large,
it's been a delightful trip.

355
00:17:52,971 --> 00:17:55,781
I now and then get the feeling,

356
00:17:55,974 --> 00:17:59,444
yeah, there's probably a big
waterfall somewhere

357
00:17:59,645 --> 00:18:00,817
there in the distance.

358
00:18:01,013 --> 00:18:03,425
I can kind of hear it
rumbling now and then,

359
00:18:03,615 --> 00:18:06,619
but what am I gonna do about it?

360
00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:09,163
The things I am
most grateful for

361
00:18:09,354 --> 00:18:11,664
are having met
the love of my life-

362
00:18:11,857 --> 00:18:14,235
not everybody gets to do that...

363
00:18:14,426 --> 00:18:16,770
and having not only met
the love of my life,

364
00:18:16,962 --> 00:18:19,966
having him feel
the same way about me,

365
00:18:20,165 --> 00:18:22,839
so that we could
build a life together

366
00:18:23,035 --> 00:18:25,982
in this absolutely
delightful little paradise

367
00:18:26,138 --> 00:18:27,845
that we get to call home,

368
00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:31,078
here under the glorious
Hollywood sign.

369
00:18:36,048 --> 00:18:38,927
In my world-I'm also
a psychic reader for a living...

370
00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:41,462
so, we don't have time lines

371
00:18:41,653 --> 00:18:44,031
because time is infinite
in my world.

372
00:18:44,223 --> 00:18:46,499
So there's no exit or entrance.

373
00:18:46,692 --> 00:18:50,469
It's just all a big giant
conglomeration of joy and love.

374
00:18:50,662 --> 00:18:52,801
So, no, I don't have
an answer to that question.

375
00:18:52,998 --> 00:18:56,172
But I plan to dance, perform,

376
00:18:56,368 --> 00:18:59,110
dance with snakes and play,
until I feel

377
00:18:59,304 --> 00:19:01,682
that my heart tells me
to do something different.

378
00:19:01,874 --> 00:19:03,854
So, it could be infinite,

379
00:19:04,042 --> 00:19:05,670
it could be tomorrow,
it could be yesterday,

380
00:19:05,677 --> 00:19:07,315
it could be five years from now,

381
00:19:07,513 --> 00:19:09,220
it could be a month.

382
00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:16,027
Oh, see? Darren James.

383
00:19:16,221 --> 00:19:18,167
Right now we have
a beautiful lady.

384
00:19:18,357 --> 00:19:20,077
Back up a little bit
and take a look at her.

385
00:19:20,259 --> 00:19:21,533
Look at this body.

386
00:19:21,727 --> 00:19:23,138
What's your name?

387
00:19:23,328 --> 00:19:25,239
- Lara.
- Lara.

388
00:19:25,430 --> 00:19:27,637
What's your age?

389
00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:29,335
Um, 19?

390
00:19:29,535 --> 00:19:31,515
19. I like that.

391
00:19:49,855 --> 00:19:53,098
And HIV scare has
reportedly shut down the porn industry

392
00:19:53,292 --> 00:19:54,999
after Darren James
contracted the virus

393
00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:57,265
after returning to the US,
after filming in Brazil.

394
00:19:57,462 --> 00:19:59,066
It was
discovered that three actresses

395
00:19:59,264 --> 00:20:01,224
who had worked with James
shortly after his return

396
00:20:01,366 --> 00:20:02,344
to the United States

397
00:20:02,534 --> 00:20:04,013
had also become infected.

398
00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:06,443
A week later, he turned
up at a San Diego County hospital

399
00:20:06,572 --> 00:20:08,347
recovering from
an apparent suicide attempt.

400
00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:10,281
He's a
middle-aged black porn actor

401
00:20:10,475 --> 00:20:12,011
who wanted to be a policeman.

402
00:20:16,315 --> 00:20:19,524
This is not going
to be a tragedy for me.

403
00:20:19,718 --> 00:20:21,561
It's a beginning.

404
00:20:26,291 --> 00:20:27,929
You got a reason to be here.

405
00:20:28,126 --> 00:20:29,901
You're gonna have
to figure that out.

406
00:20:33,432 --> 00:20:36,140
I guess I was too old
and ugly to die,

407
00:20:36,335 --> 00:20:41,444
but I've survived,
and I came back.

408
00:21:01,126 --> 00:21:02,503
I'm from Detroit.

409
00:21:02,694 --> 00:21:07,268
And I started years ago,
the United States Navy, 1982.

410
00:21:07,466 --> 00:21:11,004
Being a Seabee, it taught me
a lot about... team,

411
00:21:11,203 --> 00:21:12,409
just being a team.

412
00:21:12,604 --> 00:21:15,175
Tours all over the world.

413
00:21:15,374 --> 00:21:17,786
And when I was in Puerto Rico,
I met some Navy SEALs

414
00:21:17,976 --> 00:21:20,820
at the time, 'cause we had a training
camp right next to those guys.

415
00:21:21,013 --> 00:21:23,357
And those guys just broke me in.

416
00:21:23,548 --> 00:21:26,586
I mean, they educated me
about myself, my life.

417
00:21:26,785 --> 00:21:28,423
It was like a brotherhood.

418
00:21:28,620 --> 00:21:30,327
And it taught me something.

419
00:21:30,522 --> 00:21:34,527
Far as where I'm at now,
it's like...

420
00:21:34,693 --> 00:21:39,836
I can't leave my brothers that
were in the porn industry behind.

421
00:21:40,032 --> 00:21:42,535
That's why I speak about,
you know,

422
00:21:42,734 --> 00:21:44,975
being with the condoms issue
and everything else.

423
00:21:45,170 --> 00:21:49,175
And just trying my best
to back these guys up.

424
00:21:49,374 --> 00:21:52,048
Congratulations, recruit.

425
00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:54,355
- Good job.
- Thank you, sir.

426
00:21:55,247 --> 00:21:56,783
Congratulations, recruit.

427
00:21:56,982 --> 00:21:57,892
Thank you.

428
00:21:58,050 --> 00:21:59,825
Good job.
Mmm.

429
00:22:00,018 --> 00:22:02,658
Then, when you get on the outside,
it's like, "Wait a minute."

430
00:22:02,854 --> 00:22:04,993
"This was reality.
I need a job."

431
00:22:05,190 --> 00:22:06,692
I fell into the porn industry

432
00:22:06,892 --> 00:22:09,395
and it was just
one gig after another.

433
00:22:13,899 --> 00:22:16,243
Around the time
when I was working,

434
00:22:16,401 --> 00:22:19,075
I couldn't recall
if I got it there.

435
00:22:19,271 --> 00:22:21,376
I couldn't even tell you if
I got it before I left.

436
00:22:21,573 --> 00:22:23,382
We just don't know
'cause I worked so much

437
00:22:23,575 --> 00:22:26,522
at that period of time
when I was infected.

438
00:22:26,712 --> 00:22:31,092
But I remember I wasn't feeling
as hot when I got to Brazil

439
00:22:31,283 --> 00:22:33,490
at this one particular
time I was working.

440
00:22:33,685 --> 00:22:36,029
We were doing a huge orgy.

441
00:22:36,221 --> 00:22:38,599
It was probably my
second orgy when I got there.

442
00:22:38,790 --> 00:22:40,235
I was so tired and exhausted.

443
00:22:40,425 --> 00:22:42,427
I thought it was
just I was overworked.

444
00:22:43,462 --> 00:22:44,873
Learning how this virus works,

445
00:22:45,063 --> 00:22:48,101
that's probably at the time
where I was probably infected

446
00:22:48,300 --> 00:22:49,438
and didn't even know.

447
00:22:49,634 --> 00:22:51,875
It's hard to conclude
and come to a conclusion

448
00:22:52,070 --> 00:22:54,050
where I got it.
That's the problem.

449
00:22:54,239 --> 00:22:55,843
That's the gray area.

450
00:22:56,041 --> 00:22:57,521
I just... You know,
if I had a condom,

451
00:22:57,709 --> 00:22:59,620
this probably
wouldn't have happened.

452
00:22:59,778 --> 00:23:02,224
Period. This probably
wouldn't have happened.

453
00:23:06,318 --> 00:23:08,518
You know, I'm not thinking
this stuff would ever happen.

454
00:23:08,620 --> 00:23:11,066
The porn industry, this would
never... l would never get this.

455
00:23:11,256 --> 00:23:13,566
But the way my career ended was

456
00:23:13,759 --> 00:23:15,636
my family was in the church.

457
00:23:17,295 --> 00:23:19,297
I get diagnosed, same time,

458
00:23:19,498 --> 00:23:21,375
it's all over
the news in Detroit.

459
00:23:22,434 --> 00:23:24,311
So people
finding out right there.

460
00:23:25,804 --> 00:23:27,374
But for some reason,

461
00:23:27,572 --> 00:23:28,983
the church was smart enough...

462
00:23:29,174 --> 00:23:30,694
I haven't seen these
people in years...

463
00:23:30,742 --> 00:23:32,483
now keep in mind,
I was gone for years.

464
00:23:32,677 --> 00:23:34,554
I've been gone from home,

465
00:23:34,746 --> 00:23:38,216
and these people
protected me even then.

466
00:23:39,584 --> 00:23:41,086
They stood up for me even then.

467
00:23:41,286 --> 00:23:43,163
I didn't know
till I heard later.

468
00:23:46,124 --> 00:23:48,229
They stood up by me even then.

469
00:23:54,533 --> 00:23:57,673
If it wasn't for the individuals
I've met in my past,

470
00:23:57,869 --> 00:24:00,611
I still had that memory, like,
all these Navy SEALs that I met

471
00:24:00,806 --> 00:24:03,184
or military guys that I met
that did martial arts.

472
00:24:03,375 --> 00:24:05,252
They groomed me.
I just brought that back.

473
00:24:05,444 --> 00:24:08,118
Brought that back home
and just got off my ass.

474
00:24:08,313 --> 00:24:10,315
Got off the couch one day.
Get back in the gym.

475
00:24:10,515 --> 00:24:13,121
'Cause, you know, I can't help
nobody if I ain't helping myself.

476
00:24:13,318 --> 00:24:16,481
'Cause being a public speaker, you gotta
be able to back up what you're preaching.

477
00:24:16,488 --> 00:24:19,332
You know, they don't want to look at
somebody that's all falling apart,

478
00:24:19,524 --> 00:24:22,130
typical stigma
of being a positive.

479
00:24:22,327 --> 00:24:24,204
"Oh, this guy looks sickly."
Fuck that.

480
00:24:24,396 --> 00:24:25,807
You know, I gotta do it, man.

481
00:24:25,997 --> 00:24:27,533
You gotta get out
and do something.

482
00:24:27,732 --> 00:24:29,268
You know? And keep giving.

483
00:24:29,468 --> 00:24:32,472
As much as I can while I
still got time on the clock.

484
00:24:32,671 --> 00:24:35,379
And I got a lot more work
to do. You know?

485
00:24:35,574 --> 00:24:36,968
Who knows?
Maybe somebody will see me,

486
00:24:36,975 --> 00:24:39,182
and just do the same to help
somebody else, that's all.

487
00:24:39,377 --> 00:24:41,721
- Help, that bar?
- Yup.

488
00:24:41,913 --> 00:24:44,450
Rich Piano showed me that.
Just do the quick shit.

489
00:24:45,984 --> 00:24:48,021
A lot of times
when you've diagnosed,

490
00:24:48,186 --> 00:24:49,546
people, you know,
we get in denial.

491
00:24:49,654 --> 00:24:51,149
I've been there.
You don't wanna do nothing.

492
00:24:51,156 --> 00:24:52,567
Ah, just give up.
You can't.

493
00:24:52,757 --> 00:24:56,796
Just like cancer, any kind
of illness that you get,

494
00:24:56,995 --> 00:24:58,372
man, you gotta get up
and move on.

495
00:24:58,563 --> 00:25:01,806
You get better by doing something
for yourself, you know?

496
00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:05,243
I'll tell anybody else, we all
survivors when it com es to this.

497
00:25:05,437 --> 00:25:09,214
You know, this is not
gonna be a tragedy for me.

498
00:25:09,407 --> 00:25:10,579
It's a beginning.

499
00:25:13,211 --> 00:25:17,489
I regret that I didn't get out at
the time when I was supposed to.

500
00:25:17,682 --> 00:25:19,611
'Cause there was one period
I did get out. I quit.

501
00:25:19,618 --> 00:25:22,565
I just didn't want to do it.
You know, my morals kicked in.

502
00:25:22,754 --> 00:25:27,328
And then somebody called me back
with a decent budget.

503
00:25:27,526 --> 00:25:29,597
And we could probably
get you in a contract.

504
00:25:29,794 --> 00:25:30,898
I jumped on it.

505
00:25:32,130 --> 00:25:33,700
I should have got out.

506
00:25:33,899 --> 00:25:37,779
That's what I regret.
I didn't make that move.

507
00:25:37,969 --> 00:25:40,848
Far as anything else, I miss
the travels and the people.

508
00:25:41,039 --> 00:25:42,518
Behind the scenes, the crew.

509
00:25:42,707 --> 00:25:45,449
You know, I met some really interesting
people that opened my eyes.

510
00:25:45,644 --> 00:25:47,681
There is good people
in the industry.

511
00:25:47,879 --> 00:25:49,079
There is a lot of good people.

512
00:25:49,214 --> 00:25:51,057
But you can't talk, you know?

513
00:25:51,249 --> 00:25:52,689
You go against
the grain, you're out.

514
00:25:52,784 --> 00:25:56,095
That was their income. Like anybody
else, we're all making a living.

515
00:25:56,288 --> 00:26:00,134
But being able to stand up
against that,

516
00:26:00,325 --> 00:26:02,305
the first one in history
to stand up against...

517
00:26:02,494 --> 00:26:05,236
I think to go so hardcore
against the industry,

518
00:26:05,430 --> 00:26:08,741
to show that they had some things that
were wrong and then address it...

519
00:26:10,402 --> 00:26:11,813
I don't regret that.

520
00:26:12,003 --> 00:26:16,452
Because you can't save
everybody, but I can try.

521
00:26:16,608 --> 00:26:18,747
They're not gonna like it,
but I'll keep trying.

522
00:26:26,751 --> 00:26:28,731
In California, there is
a push right now,

523
00:26:28,920 --> 00:26:30,490
primarily from one organization,

524
00:26:30,689 --> 00:26:33,727
to try and force performers
to wear condoms

525
00:26:33,925 --> 00:26:36,405
amongst other safety gear,
at all times.

526
00:26:36,595 --> 00:26:38,268
And the truth of the matter is

527
00:26:38,463 --> 00:26:40,670
there are negative
effects of condoms.

528
00:26:40,865 --> 00:26:42,425
But we're not allowed
to talk about them

529
00:26:42,534 --> 00:26:45,674
because it's so difficult to get
people to use them in the first place.

530
00:26:45,870 --> 00:26:48,350
You can imagine that's not
a very popular topic.

531
00:26:48,540 --> 00:26:51,521
The truth of the matter is
when people use condoms,

532
00:26:51,676 --> 00:26:53,485
as compared
to not using condoms,

533
00:26:53,678 --> 00:26:56,158
it's been tested with people
within the same partner,

534
00:26:56,348 --> 00:26:58,521
that condom use does
increase the presence

535
00:26:58,717 --> 00:27:01,323
of three different types of
bacteria, at least, in the vagina,

536
00:27:01,519 --> 00:27:04,090
and also causes erythema,
or a reddening in the vulva,

537
00:27:04,289 --> 00:27:06,599
which is consistent
with more tearing.

538
00:27:06,791 --> 00:27:09,294
So if the performers
are testing,

539
00:27:09,494 --> 00:27:11,132
and they know
that they're clean,

540
00:27:11,329 --> 00:27:12,649
by using condoms,
they're probably

541
00:27:12,797 --> 00:27:14,868
increasing their risk
of bacterial infection.

542
00:27:15,033 --> 00:27:18,776
So they actually have a really
good ground to argue against

543
00:27:18,970 --> 00:27:21,007
the use of condoms,
especially in the context,

544
00:27:21,206 --> 00:27:22,617
in the way that
they're using them.

545
00:27:22,807 --> 00:27:25,720
Because there is some associated
increased risk with it.

546
00:27:25,910 --> 00:27:28,015
However, you can
imagine the knee-jerk

547
00:27:28,213 --> 00:27:29,954
to that kind of response.

548
00:27:30,148 --> 00:27:33,789
Especially, you know, I work
with a lot of HIV researchers.

549
00:27:33,985 --> 00:27:36,158
We do not want
to have this conversation.

550
00:27:36,354 --> 00:27:40,632
Just because it's so difficult to get people who
aren't being tested like the performers are

551
00:27:40,825 --> 00:27:42,395
to use condoms
in the first place.

552
00:27:42,594 --> 00:27:44,164
We would hate
to discourage their use

553
00:27:44,362 --> 00:27:45,966
amongst those type of folks.

554
00:27:46,164 --> 00:27:47,802
But I think amongst performers,

555
00:27:47,999 --> 00:27:50,878
it's probably very reasonable
to let them make that decision.

556
00:28:02,947 --> 00:28:07,191
This painting is the quickest
painting I've ever done.

557
00:28:07,385 --> 00:28:08,921
My boyfriend and I were...

558
00:28:09,120 --> 00:28:11,225
You know how you get in
little spats, little fights?

559
00:28:11,423 --> 00:28:12,993
We were fighting
and I went to bed,

560
00:28:13,191 --> 00:28:16,035
and I couldn't sleep.
I was furious with him.

561
00:28:16,227 --> 00:28:18,764
And I got up, it was
three o'clock in the morning,

562
00:28:18,963 --> 00:28:21,739
and I came down and I grabbed
my biggest canvas that I had,

563
00:28:21,933 --> 00:28:24,277
and just let it all out.

564
00:28:24,469 --> 00:28:25,829
That's how most
of my paintings go.

565
00:28:25,870 --> 00:28:28,680
You know, I don't have any
training, it's just what I feel.

566
00:28:28,873 --> 00:28:31,217
So, this one
is called "Mad Love."

567
00:28:33,044 --> 00:28:35,456
And it's actually
one of my favorites.

568
00:28:44,956 --> 00:28:47,903
Grr. Arf. Arf.
Give it up.

569
00:28:48,093 --> 00:28:50,198
I'm originally
from Rockford, Illinois.

570
00:28:50,395 --> 00:28:53,968
And there are two things that came
out of Rockford that are famous.

571
00:28:54,165 --> 00:28:56,236
Cheap Trick, and Ginger Lynn.

572
00:29:07,278 --> 00:29:09,986
Porn, it had gone from
the place where

573
00:29:10,181 --> 00:29:12,627
you sat in a theater
in your raincoat and jerked off

574
00:29:12,817 --> 00:29:16,492
to you bought a VCR, and you
got a Ginger Lynn movie.

575
00:29:17,355 --> 00:29:19,733
I was one of the first girls

576
00:29:19,924 --> 00:29:22,427
that didn't look like
I did What I did.

577
00:29:22,627 --> 00:29:25,301
I became
so well known so quickly.

578
00:29:25,497 --> 00:29:28,137
A lot of mainstream actors
knew who I was.

579
00:29:28,333 --> 00:29:32,076
They were as excited to meet me
as I was to meet them.

580
00:29:32,270 --> 00:29:34,682
I was, you know,
their first porn.

581
00:29:38,209 --> 00:29:41,156
- In the '80s when it was cool to
be a porn star... - Yeah.

582
00:29:41,346 --> 00:29:44,327
...and celebrities
wanted to meet you,

583
00:29:44,516 --> 00:29:47,827
I went to lunch
with my attorney,

584
00:29:48,019 --> 00:29:49,760
and Milton Berle...

585
00:29:51,055 --> 00:29:52,534
I'm 21 years old,

586
00:29:52,724 --> 00:29:54,260
I'm sitting in
this old Hollywood,

587
00:29:54,459 --> 00:29:57,872
dark wood,
red leather seat restaurant,

588
00:29:58,062 --> 00:30:01,043
and I'm in between
my attorney and Milton Berle,

589
00:30:01,232 --> 00:30:05,681
and Milton Berle unzips his
pants and whips his dick out.

590
00:30:05,870 --> 00:30:08,282
Just whips it right out
in the restaurant

591
00:30:08,473 --> 00:30:10,316
right in front of me.

592
00:30:10,508 --> 00:30:13,114
And I'm trying
to maintain eye contact,

593
00:30:13,311 --> 00:30:15,689
but it's very difficult.
I kept looking down at it.

594
00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:18,690
He never tried anything,
didn't try to touch me,

595
00:30:18,883 --> 00:30:20,726
didn't play with it,
he just whipped it out

596
00:30:20,919 --> 00:30:23,957
and let it hang the whole
dinner... the whole lunch.

597
00:30:24,155 --> 00:30:25,361
Are the stories true?

598
00:30:25,557 --> 00:30:27,798
Oh, it's huge! It's huge!

599
00:30:27,992 --> 00:30:30,632
He would give John Holmes
a run for the money.

600
00:30:30,829 --> 00:30:34,140
Big, huge, honkin' dick.

601
00:30:34,332 --> 00:30:39,839
I started my adult film career
December 9th, 1983.

602
00:30:40,038 --> 00:30:43,815
I turned 21 five days later
on December 14th.

603
00:30:44,008 --> 00:30:47,649
I filmed until
February 11th 1986.

604
00:30:47,846 --> 00:30:49,757
But the thing I remember
about that last day...

605
00:30:49,948 --> 00:30:52,360
It was a couple weeks
before I quit,

606
00:30:52,550 --> 00:30:53,528
I woke up,

607
00:30:53,718 --> 00:30:55,220
and most days I would
wake up and go,

608
00:30:55,420 --> 00:30:57,730
"Yes! I'm going to have
sex with this person today!"

609
00:30:57,922 --> 00:30:59,765
"I'm gonna fuck that person,
eat this pussy,"

610
00:30:59,958 --> 00:31:01,335
and I would be so excited.

611
00:31:01,526 --> 00:31:04,166
I woke up this
one particular morning

612
00:31:04,362 --> 00:31:05,773
and I said to myself,

613
00:31:05,964 --> 00:31:08,945
"I don't want to fuck today.
I'm done."

614
00:31:09,133 --> 00:31:11,841
So, I was under contract
with Vivid Video at the time.

615
00:31:12,036 --> 00:31:13,538
I went into Vivid and said,
you know,

616
00:31:13,738 --> 00:31:15,217
I talked to the owner and said,

617
00:31:15,406 --> 00:31:19,183
"My head's not in the right
place and I can't do this."

618
00:31:19,377 --> 00:31:21,584
He said, "Cool, I understand."

619
00:31:21,779 --> 00:31:23,339
"Is there any way
that you could finish"

620
00:31:23,414 --> 00:31:25,394
"your last two
films under contract?"

621
00:31:25,583 --> 00:31:27,358
And I said yes.

622
00:31:27,552 --> 00:31:29,930
And February 11th, I came home,

623
00:31:30,121 --> 00:31:31,964
and my boyfriend
had taken our bathtub

624
00:31:32,156 --> 00:31:36,571
and filled it with gallons
and gallons and gallons of milk

625
00:31:36,761 --> 00:31:38,035
and white rose petals.

626
00:31:38,229 --> 00:31:42,041
And I had a cleansing bath that
I was done with the business.

627
00:31:42,233 --> 00:31:45,806
And there was something
really romantic about that.

628
00:31:46,004 --> 00:31:48,041
It was like,
it really was a cleansing.

629
00:31:48,239 --> 00:31:50,239
And not that there's anything
bad about what I did,

630
00:31:50,408 --> 00:31:53,337
but I was moving on
to another phase of my life.

631
00:31:53,344 --> 00:31:55,585
When I quit, I didn't think
about the big picture.

632
00:31:55,780 --> 00:31:56,740
What am I gonna do next?

633
00:31:56,915 --> 00:31:58,394
I owned a house
in Beverly Hills.

634
00:31:58,583 --> 00:32:00,062
I had a mortgage to pay.

635
00:32:03,121 --> 00:32:05,829
I guess I would say yes,

636
00:32:06,024 --> 00:32:08,163
I did always want to be in
the entertainment business

637
00:32:08,359 --> 00:32:10,965
without really realizing it.

638
00:32:11,162 --> 00:32:12,835
And I am now.

639
00:32:13,031 --> 00:32:15,170
Sol broke into
the mainstream arena.

640
00:32:15,333 --> 00:32:17,609
I worked on dozens of films.

641
00:32:17,802 --> 00:32:20,009
I've got a new film coming out
called "Lost Souls."

642
00:32:20,204 --> 00:32:22,411
- Oh, wow.
- Should be out for Halloween.

643
00:32:22,607 --> 00:32:23,984
Another film.

644
00:32:24,175 --> 00:32:26,871
I have a very small role in the Coen
Brothers new film "The Big Lebowski."

645
00:32:26,878 --> 00:32:28,255
- What else?
- Oh, wow.

646
00:32:28,446 --> 00:32:31,142
"Wing Commander: Prophecy" with Mark
Hamill will be out for Christmas.

647
00:32:31,149 --> 00:32:34,289
And "God's Lonely Man" with
Justine Bateman will be out soon.

648
00:32:34,485 --> 00:32:35,759
<i>Wow'!</i>

649
00:32:35,954 --> 00:32:38,935
This is gonna sound awful.
I was having really shitty sex.

650
00:32:39,123 --> 00:32:41,694
I couldn't find a lover
that could satisfy me

651
00:32:41,893 --> 00:32:43,668
to save my life for years.

652
00:32:43,861 --> 00:32:45,932
I just wanted
to get fucked good.

653
00:32:46,130 --> 00:32:49,111
I just really wanted...
I wanted to have sex with girls.

654
00:32:49,300 --> 00:32:50,643
I wanted to get fucked by boys.

655
00:32:50,835 --> 00:32:52,644
I wanted to...
I wanted good sex.

656
00:32:52,837 --> 00:32:55,511
So I went to Vivid,
I went to Wicked,

657
00:32:55,707 --> 00:33:00,053
and I went to VCA,
and made exorbitant requests.

658
00:33:00,244 --> 00:33:02,053
Making a comeback,
this is what I want.

659
00:33:02,246 --> 00:33:04,658
Get all three of the companies,
made me an offer,

660
00:33:04,849 --> 00:33:06,851
and I decided to go with VCA.

661
00:33:07,018 --> 00:33:08,578
And there's a film I did
called "Taken."

662
00:33:08,653 --> 00:33:12,226
The director was Veronica Han.
She came to me and she said,

663
00:33:12,423 --> 00:33:15,131
"Ginger, you know, I just don't
think this is gonna happen.

664
00:33:15,326 --> 00:33:17,966
"And I think you're the only
actress that can pull this off.

665
00:33:18,162 --> 00:33:19,698
"I want to make it into a porn,

666
00:33:19,897 --> 00:33:21,877
and I want you
to be the star in it."

667
00:33:22,033 --> 00:33:23,694
I won best actress for
that film that year.

668
00:33:23,701 --> 00:33:27,979
And it's the only best actress award
I've won that I thought I deserved.

669
00:33:28,172 --> 00:33:30,345
I'd become an actress.

670
00:33:32,210 --> 00:33:33,985
A lot of people
that get into porn,

671
00:33:34,178 --> 00:33:35,680
there is no life after porn.

672
00:33:35,880 --> 00:33:37,560
They don't know
what to do with themselves.

673
00:33:37,582 --> 00:33:40,586
And if you're known as
a sex object your whole life

674
00:33:40,785 --> 00:33:42,560
and sex is all you know,

675
00:33:42,754 --> 00:33:44,474
where do you go?
How do you apply for a job?

676
00:33:44,522 --> 00:33:47,992
You know, I've been fucking
on film for the last 30 years?

677
00:33:48,192 --> 00:33:50,900
And it's important that you
think about your future.

678
00:33:51,095 --> 00:33:54,269
You think about what's
going to happen afterwards.

679
00:33:54,465 --> 00:33:55,910
I've been really lucky with...

680
00:33:56,100 --> 00:33:57,704
you know,
I started three Web sites

681
00:33:57,902 --> 00:34:01,076
as well as doing my paintings

682
00:34:01,272 --> 00:34:03,115
and everything,
I have my auction site.

683
00:34:03,307 --> 00:34:06,288
Ginger Lynn Auctions dot com,
Ginger Lynn dot com,

684
00:34:06,477 --> 00:34:09,515
and my an site, which is
Ginger Lynn An dot com.

685
00:34:09,714 --> 00:34:12,786
So I've always got a lot
of different eggs in the basket

686
00:34:12,984 --> 00:34:15,021
and things to fall back on.

687
00:34:15,219 --> 00:34:16,527
'Cause it scares me.

688
00:34:16,721 --> 00:34:18,200
You know, I don't want to be 60

689
00:34:18,389 --> 00:34:20,960
and have nothing to show
what I've worked for.

690
00:34:23,895 --> 00:34:28,037
I did a half-a-dozen films
in, like, 2005.

691
00:34:29,500 --> 00:34:32,538
I wouldn't recommend anybody
get into the business today.

692
00:34:32,737 --> 00:34:36,207
I just wouldn't.
It's changed so much.

693
00:34:36,407 --> 00:34:38,444
I had been cast on a film,

694
00:34:38,643 --> 00:34:41,385
and there was somebody else
doing a scene before me,

695
00:34:41,579 --> 00:34:45,459
very famous, very well known
actress in the business,

696
00:34:45,650 --> 00:34:47,061
good friend of mine.

697
00:34:47,251 --> 00:34:49,390
And she was sitting on the sofa,

698
00:34:49,587 --> 00:34:51,965
and there was her costar
on the other end of the sofa.

699
00:34:52,123 --> 00:34:53,602
This is before filming.

700
00:34:53,791 --> 00:34:56,135
I used to get in trouble
on every single set.

701
00:34:56,327 --> 00:34:59,171
Once my makeup was done,
I'm on you.

702
00:34:59,363 --> 00:35:01,523
I'd be sucking your dick,
I'd be kissing you, you know,

703
00:35:01,599 --> 00:35:03,010
and then have to redo my makeup.

704
00:35:03,201 --> 00:35:06,148
I'd get in trouble all the time
because I wanted to be there.

705
00:35:06,337 --> 00:35:10,683
These two people sat on opposite
ends of the sofa on their phones.

706
00:35:10,875 --> 00:35:14,371
And then they called, you know, "We're ready for
you on set," and they just went and fucked.

707
00:35:14,378 --> 00:35:17,587
There was no connection,
no nothing.

708
00:35:17,782 --> 00:35:21,924
Sex is such
an intimate thing, for me,

709
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:24,361
that I have to like you
to fuck you.

710
00:35:24,555 --> 00:35:26,933
I have to want to be with you.

711
00:35:27,125 --> 00:35:29,662
I want that buildup,
that anticipation,

712
00:35:29,861 --> 00:35:31,021
that "I can't wait."
You know?

713
00:35:31,195 --> 00:35:34,472
If you're in an industry
that's that intimate,

714
00:35:34,665 --> 00:35:37,009
you need to love
what you're doing.

715
00:35:37,168 --> 00:35:39,045
I always have said

716
00:35:39,237 --> 00:35:41,513
if you call me a whore,
I'll, like, want to punch you.

717
00:35:41,706 --> 00:35:44,016
You can call me
a slut all day long.

718
00:35:44,208 --> 00:35:47,018
I like to fuck, and I've
fucked a lot of people.

719
00:35:47,178 --> 00:35:48,298
But I've never been a whore.

720
00:35:48,379 --> 00:35:52,191
And if I worked at McDonald's
and didn't like it,

721
00:35:52,383 --> 00:35:53,327
I'd be a whore.

722
00:35:53,518 --> 00:35:55,198
It doesn't necessarily
have to do with sex.

723
00:35:55,386 --> 00:35:59,300
Doing something you don't want to
for money is a whore in my opinion.

724
00:36:09,000 --> 00:36:11,708
A lot of the women
in the adult film industry

725
00:36:11,903 --> 00:36:16,750
completely separate their porn
lives from their personal lives.

726
00:36:16,941 --> 00:36:19,148
They don't mix,
they have different names.

727
00:36:19,343 --> 00:36:26,192
And they turn their porn star
on and off as needed.

728
00:36:26,384 --> 00:36:27,988
What I've chosen to do-

729
00:36:28,186 --> 00:36:30,188
I don't know if I chose it
or it just happened...

730
00:36:30,388 --> 00:36:34,768
is I brought Ginger...
Ginger Lynn Allen... to the set.

731
00:36:34,959 --> 00:36:38,065
Everything that you see me
do on film is me.

732
00:36:38,262 --> 00:36:40,367
My energy, my bubbles,
my enthusiasm.

733
00:36:40,565 --> 00:36:44,445
That's who I am. There is no
Ginger Lynn and Ginger Allen.

734
00:36:44,635 --> 00:36:45,670
They're the same person.

735
00:36:45,870 --> 00:36:47,281
I have porn star Tourette's.

736
00:36:47,471 --> 00:36:49,678
I say things I shouldn't say
when I shouldn't say them.

737
00:36:49,874 --> 00:36:52,377
I own every choice
that I've ever made.

738
00:36:52,577 --> 00:36:55,183
I'm not ashamed
of anything I've done.

739
00:36:55,379 --> 00:36:58,189
I have lived an amazing life.

740
00:36:58,382 --> 00:37:00,089
I have absolutely no regrets.

741
00:37:00,284 --> 00:37:04,755
And I like Ginger Lynn.
And I like Ginger Allen.

742
00:37:04,956 --> 00:37:06,902
Because they're the same person.

743
00:37:24,475 --> 00:37:26,716
Um, I got in because I wanted
to try something new.

744
00:37:26,911 --> 00:37:28,939
'Cause, you know, I'm just,
like, a college student.

745
00:37:28,946 --> 00:37:30,425
Going to classes, working.

746
00:37:30,615 --> 00:37:33,221
That whole, like, life,
trying to barely live.

747
00:37:33,417 --> 00:37:35,226
And so I was like,
"Yeah, I'm gonna do porn."

748
00:37:35,419 --> 00:37:37,330
"I like sex.
Why not? Fuck it."

749
00:37:37,521 --> 00:37:38,966
So I got into it,

750
00:37:39,156 --> 00:37:40,499
and like, I really
love it so far.

751
00:37:40,658 --> 00:37:43,605
I'm still in school, you know.
My major is business,

752
00:37:43,794 --> 00:37:46,775
so once I graduate I'm gonna
go into real estate.

753
00:37:46,964 --> 00:37:50,343
So if I'm still doing porn then,
like, yeah, whatever, side job.

754
00:37:50,534 --> 00:37:52,013
But like, you know.

755
00:37:52,203 --> 00:37:54,342
That's what I'm, like,
going in for rig ht now.

756
00:38:05,483 --> 00:38:07,429
I'm Johnnie Keyes, man.
Who are you?

757
00:38:15,393 --> 00:38:16,770
Are we In heaven?

758
00:38:16,961 --> 00:38:20,340
Baby, you're in the back seat
of a Cadillac Brougham.

759
00:38:20,531 --> 00:38:23,034
That's as close to heaven
as you're gonna get.

760
00:38:27,371 --> 00:38:31,342
The most happiest
I am on this planet:

761
00:38:31,542 --> 00:38:35,684
hugging my son or granddaughter,
singing jazz,

762
00:38:35,880 --> 00:38:38,690
and getting all
the pussy I can get.

763
00:38:38,883 --> 00:38:40,191
That's it.

764
00:38:59,537 --> 00:39:03,485
I was raised
during the '40s and '50s

765
00:39:03,674 --> 00:39:05,551
when this country
was a different place,

766
00:39:07,578 --> 00:39:10,354
when the Italians
used to call me a "jig,"

767
00:39:10,548 --> 00:39:13,256
which is the guy dancing, right?

768
00:39:13,451 --> 00:39:16,022
I was raised in the ghetto,
where poor people was, right?

769
00:39:16,220 --> 00:39:19,861
You know. Catholic school,
all that.

770
00:39:20,057 --> 00:39:22,503
But I always
wanted to be a singer.

771
00:39:23,694 --> 00:39:26,265
♪ A-one, two,
a-one, two, three, four

772
00:39:26,464 --> 00:39:29,377
I was always singing
on the corner with my boys,

773
00:39:29,567 --> 00:39:32,514
you know, doing copies
of all the hit music,

774
00:39:32,703 --> 00:39:34,444
Little Richard
and all those guys.

775
00:39:34,638 --> 00:39:36,276
♪ I'm the only
other one you see

776
00:39:36,474 --> 00:39:39,546
♪ Gotta give it a chance
to rock her world tonight

777
00:39:39,744 --> 00:39:41,746
♪ Ow-woo!

778
00:39:45,082 --> 00:39:49,462
I was a happy teenager except
when I was at home, all rig ht.

779
00:39:49,653 --> 00:39:53,931
When I turned 16 years old,
I packed my shit and I left,

780
00:39:54,091 --> 00:39:55,729
to get out of that situation.

781
00:39:55,926 --> 00:39:59,738
My dad was alcoholic. He used
to beat women and beat me,

782
00:39:59,930 --> 00:40:01,534
and I had to get out of that.

783
00:40:04,435 --> 00:40:05,311
Hmm.

784
00:40:07,304 --> 00:40:08,749
And...

785
00:40:11,642 --> 00:40:14,987
And it's like,
this motherfucker, my dad,

786
00:40:15,179 --> 00:40:17,318
he fucking didn't
know what love was.

787
00:40:17,481 --> 00:40:19,552
He didn't know
about that, you know?

788
00:40:19,750 --> 00:40:23,095
And I can't blame him
'cause how he was raised.

789
00:40:23,287 --> 00:40:26,291
He was raised during slavery.
I can understand that.

790
00:40:26,490 --> 00:40:29,300
But I couldn't understand
how could he beat his boy?

791
00:40:29,493 --> 00:40:31,598
How could he beat
his fucking son?

792
00:40:31,796 --> 00:40:34,242
And I said, "I gotta go.
I gotta get out of here,"

793
00:40:34,432 --> 00:40:35,342
sol left home.

794
00:40:35,533 --> 00:40:37,774
Geez, can I get
a napkin? Fuck.

795
00:40:40,638 --> 00:40:43,585
You know, every time I talk
about that, it fucks me up.

796
00:40:45,176 --> 00:40:47,417
I had to leave. I got out.

797
00:40:49,847 --> 00:40:51,520
So, I joined the Army,

798
00:40:51,715 --> 00:40:54,423
and I became
the boxing champion,

799
00:40:54,618 --> 00:40:56,427
the lightweight
champion of the world.

800
00:40:56,620 --> 00:41:00,158
The United States Army
sent me to 37 countries.

801
00:41:00,357 --> 00:41:02,359
And all I did was
kick ass and take names

802
00:41:02,526 --> 00:41:03,698
'cause I had a lot of anger.

803
00:41:03,894 --> 00:41:07,137
And so when I would get in
the ring with another opponent,

804
00:41:07,331 --> 00:41:09,368
he had no chance.

805
00:41:19,977 --> 00:41:21,257
When I got
into the "Green Door."

806
00:41:21,345 --> 00:41:22,473
I got in the "Green Door" like

807
00:41:22,480 --> 00:41:24,391
I stumbled over it
backwards falling, right?

808
00:41:24,582 --> 00:41:26,391
"The Green Door,"
when I did that movie.

809
00:41:26,584 --> 00:41:28,704
Now, when the people came
to me with the "Green Door,"

810
00:41:28,819 --> 00:41:30,196
here's what happened.

811
00:41:30,387 --> 00:41:32,516
So we went down there. It was
the Mitchell Brothers theatre

812
00:41:32,523 --> 00:41:33,723
who produced the "Green Door."

813
00:41:33,858 --> 00:41:36,304
I went down there, I did
the audition and everything.

814
00:41:36,494 --> 00:41:38,531
And then when they came
back to me, they said,

815
00:41:38,729 --> 00:41:41,369
"Well, listen man,
we're making an erotic film."

816
00:41:41,565 --> 00:41:42,925
I went, "What do you
mean, erotic?"

817
00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:44,070
"A fuck movie."

818
00:41:44,235 --> 00:41:45,475
I go, "Oh, yeah. Okay, cool."

819
00:41:45,669 --> 00:41:47,740
Jim Mitchell, Art Mitchell,
they're upstairs,

820
00:41:47,938 --> 00:41:49,600
over at the O'Farrell Theatre.
They go, "Johnnie",

821
00:41:49,607 --> 00:41:51,207
"you're gonna be
the man behind the door,

822
00:41:51,275 --> 00:41:55,746
and you're gonna have a sex
scene with Marilyn Chambers."

823
00:41:55,913 --> 00:41:57,984
So, I go, "Okay. All right."

824
00:41:58,182 --> 00:41:59,559
So, they bring me
out at the end.

825
00:41:59,750 --> 00:42:03,527
She's 20 years old, looking like a
little fresh white flower, rig ht?

826
00:42:03,721 --> 00:42:05,098
I'm going, "Yeah, right."

827
00:42:05,289 --> 00:42:07,599
Now, come the day
of the shoot, rig ht,

828
00:42:07,791 --> 00:42:10,031
and the Mitchell Brothers had
a whole other thing set up.

829
00:42:10,194 --> 00:42:11,605
I said, "Hold it, man."

830
00:42:11,795 --> 00:42:14,674
Being a thespian myself,
I go, "Hold it."

831
00:42:14,865 --> 00:42:17,345
"Here's what I'm gonna do. Here's
how I'm gonna do the shot.

832
00:42:17,535 --> 00:42:20,516
"I'm gonna have my
African necklace on, rig ht,

833
00:42:20,704 --> 00:42:23,014
"and when I walk
from behind the green door,

834
00:42:23,207 --> 00:42:25,687
"there's women there
and they're trying to touch me,

835
00:42:25,876 --> 00:42:27,971
but I'm not gonna let them
touch me 'cause I'm focused."

836
00:42:27,978 --> 00:42:30,356
And Marilyn Chambers is
lying out there like this.

837
00:42:30,548 --> 00:42:33,586
My eye is focused on that muffin, rig ht?
You know what I'm saying?

838
00:42:33,784 --> 00:42:35,229
So, I'm looking at that.

839
00:42:35,419 --> 00:42:37,421
And now, when we start
doing the sex scene,

840
00:42:37,588 --> 00:42:39,932
I eat her pussy, and then
I start fucking her, right?

841
00:42:40,124 --> 00:42:43,628
But being an athlete,

842
00:42:43,827 --> 00:42:47,468
I fucked Marilyn for 43 minutes
without stopping,

843
00:42:47,631 --> 00:42:51,602
and the last time she came,
she fainted.

844
00:42:51,802 --> 00:42:54,043
And I'm looking
down at this woman,

845
00:42:54,238 --> 00:42:56,240
her eyes rolled in
the back of her head,

846
00:42:56,440 --> 00:42:57,612
and I went, "What the hell?"

847
00:42:57,808 --> 00:42:59,719
"I done killed a white woman,
I'm going to jail.

848
00:42:59,910 --> 00:43:02,481
I killed a white woman with
my dick! What the fuck?"

849
00:43:02,646 --> 00:43:04,250
This is what's going on
in my brain

850
00:43:04,448 --> 00:43:05,893
as I'm looking down at her,

851
00:43:06,083 --> 00:43:08,256
and she's like...
"Eh," right?

852
00:43:08,452 --> 00:43:10,056
So, they said, "Okay, Johnnie."

853
00:43:10,254 --> 00:43:12,814
"Get back up off the pussy and
walk back through the green door."

854
00:43:12,856 --> 00:43:15,063
They pick Marilyn up
and bring her over on the side

855
00:43:15,259 --> 00:43:17,830
and put smelling salts in her nose
and shit to bring her around.

856
00:43:18,028 --> 00:43:20,668
I bend down, I go,
"Marilyn, are you all right?"

857
00:43:20,864 --> 00:43:22,309
And she looked at me, she goes,

858
00:43:22,499 --> 00:43:25,571
"Oh, Johnnie, oh..."
She says, "Oh, Johnnie."I go...

859
00:43:25,769 --> 00:43:27,771
I go, "What happened?"
She says, "I don't know."

860
00:43:27,972 --> 00:43:30,976
She says, "I came and then
I went somewhere."

861
00:43:31,175 --> 00:43:32,745
And I go, "Jesus Christ!"

862
00:43:32,943 --> 00:43:36,481
So now, I'm back on Broadway
doing "Jesus Christ Superstar."

863
00:43:36,680 --> 00:43:38,489
I get a call.
"Hey, Johnnie, what's up?

864
00:43:38,682 --> 00:43:40,642
"How you doing? Yeah."
from the Mitchell Brothers.

865
00:43:40,718 --> 00:43:42,646
They say, "You know
you're the star of this movie."

866
00:43:42,653 --> 00:43:43,947
I go, "What you talking
about, man?"

867
00:43:43,954 --> 00:43:46,114
I said, "I'm in theater,
I'm doing legitimate theater."

868
00:43:46,156 --> 00:43:48,102
I'm not no porno star."

869
00:43:48,292 --> 00:43:49,703
They go,
"Yes, you are."

870
00:43:49,893 --> 00:43:51,253
I go, "What are
you talking about?"

871
00:43:51,362 --> 00:43:54,605
They go, "We got a $50,000 check
waiting for you",

872
00:43:54,798 --> 00:43:57,335
"and you gotta go
to Cannes Film Festival

873
00:43:57,534 --> 00:43:59,309
because they're
dying to meet you."

874
00:43:59,503 --> 00:44:02,780
And I went, "How much?
50,000? Okay."

875
00:44:04,375 --> 00:44:07,515
So that made the myth of
the black dude with the big dick

876
00:44:07,678 --> 00:44:10,716
in white society,
it made it real.

877
00:44:10,914 --> 00:44:15,021
It made it real for society,
and they went, "What?"

878
00:44:15,219 --> 00:44:16,391
I get off the plane, man,

879
00:44:16,587 --> 00:44:19,124
and women are throwing
their panties and their keys,

880
00:44:19,323 --> 00:44:20,961
and everything. "Oh, Johnnie!"

881
00:44:21,158 --> 00:44:24,196
Our pavilion was going 24 hours.

882
00:44:24,361 --> 00:44:26,341
Everybody was staying
open like, eight hours.

883
00:44:26,530 --> 00:44:28,976
"The Green Door" was going 2417.

884
00:44:29,166 --> 00:44:32,409
Sol get the award for
the best erotic film ever shot

885
00:44:32,603 --> 00:44:33,809
and all that stuff.

886
00:44:34,004 --> 00:44:37,008
And I come back home
to the United States,

887
00:44:37,207 --> 00:44:39,380
and I figure that's it, right?

888
00:44:39,576 --> 00:44:41,351
I figure, "Okay,
I'm finished with that."

889
00:44:41,545 --> 00:44:43,252
But then all
this stuff happened.

890
00:44:43,447 --> 00:44:45,154
They want me
to come to New York,

891
00:44:45,349 --> 00:44:47,192
they want me to come to Detroit

892
00:44:47,384 --> 00:44:49,046
to do all these openings
for "the Green Door"

893
00:44:49,053 --> 00:44:50,726
where I'm sitting
and signing autographs.

894
00:44:50,921 --> 00:44:53,026
That whole deal, rig ht?
That was cool.

895
00:44:53,223 --> 00:44:55,669
Then after that me and Marilyn
did two more movies together.

896
00:44:55,859 --> 00:44:58,169
"Inside Marilyn Chambers,"

897
00:44:58,362 --> 00:44:59,932
and her
"Resurrection of Eve."

898
00:45:00,130 --> 00:45:03,703
Later on, when I used to go
to the erotic film awards,

899
00:45:03,901 --> 00:45:06,177
all the brothers would see me,
they'd go like this.

900
00:45:07,938 --> 00:45:10,748
'Cause if it weren't for me,
they wouldn't be there.

901
00:45:11,875 --> 00:45:13,718
I opened the door for them.

902
00:45:14,978 --> 00:45:16,286
Which was cool.

903
00:45:16,480 --> 00:45:18,187
At the time I didn't
know what I was doing.

904
00:45:18,382 --> 00:45:19,702
I was just
doing what I was doing.

905
00:45:22,886 --> 00:45:25,389
I was doing this shot
for the Mitchell Brothers

906
00:45:25,589 --> 00:45:27,193
in a theater
down on Market Street,

907
00:45:27,391 --> 00:45:29,894
Market Street in San Francisco.

908
00:45:30,094 --> 00:45:33,200
I was doing a reenactment
of "the Green Door"

909
00:45:33,397 --> 00:45:35,308
for a live audience.

910
00:45:35,499 --> 00:45:38,639
Meanwhile, they got
seven cops in the audience.

911
00:45:38,836 --> 00:45:40,782
And when I pull out my dick
and go to do it,

912
00:45:40,971 --> 00:45:44,544
they all, cops just came in
and busted me. Took me to jail.

913
00:45:44,742 --> 00:45:46,622
Of course the Mitchells got me
out insto-presto.

914
00:45:46,744 --> 00:45:48,087
But then I went
before the court.

915
00:45:48,278 --> 00:45:51,452
So we had to moved it up
to the California Supreme Court.

916
00:45:51,648 --> 00:45:55,721
Fornication in a public place,
that was the charge.

917
00:45:55,919 --> 00:45:58,014
And I said, "Man, I'm not
sticking my dick in these women."

918
00:45:58,021 --> 00:46:00,126
I'm moving it to the side.
It's a play-act thing."

919
00:46:00,324 --> 00:46:03,464
'Course, you know, those cops,
those motherfuckers.

920
00:46:03,660 --> 00:46:06,436
So, I go before
the Supreme Court.

921
00:46:06,630 --> 00:46:08,303
So, they call me up and they go,

922
00:46:08,499 --> 00:46:10,911
"Okay, Johnnie, what you
got to say?"

923
00:46:11,101 --> 00:46:14,571
All these old men with their
gray hair and their soft dicks.

924
00:46:14,772 --> 00:46:18,686
So, I go, "Would you rather
for your children"

925
00:46:18,876 --> 00:46:22,688
"to see people cut each other
up, blow each other up,

926
00:46:22,846 --> 00:46:24,757
"kill each other,

927
00:46:24,948 --> 00:46:26,859
"or would you rather
for your children to see

928
00:46:27,050 --> 00:46:30,361
"people hugging and kissing
and making love?

929
00:46:30,554 --> 00:46:33,694
Which would you rather
for your children to see?"

930
00:46:33,891 --> 00:46:38,806
Of course, they can't say.
They gotta say the latter,

931
00:46:38,996 --> 00:46:40,873
the hugging and the kissing.

932
00:46:41,064 --> 00:46:44,375
And my testimony helped change

933
00:46:44,535 --> 00:46:47,846
the sexual mores
of this country.

934
00:46:49,206 --> 00:46:54,781
It made it legal for human
beings to go to a store

935
00:46:54,978 --> 00:46:58,790
and rent
an X-rated movie legally.

936
00:46:58,982 --> 00:47:02,896
And I helped make that thing
a reality in this country.

937
00:47:03,086 --> 00:47:05,692
So, I freed a lot
of dicks and pussies.

938
00:47:05,889 --> 00:47:07,609
That's howl feel
about it. Know what I mean?

939
00:47:07,758 --> 00:47:10,170
Real talk. That's real talk.

940
00:47:13,163 --> 00:47:17,908
Years ago, I did a play on
Broadway called "The Wiz,"

941
00:47:18,101 --> 00:47:21,082
and that's the black production
of "The Wizard of Oz"

942
00:47:21,238 --> 00:47:23,809
if you people don't know.

943
00:47:24,007 --> 00:47:25,714
One night,

944
00:47:25,909 --> 00:47:30,187
the lead singer in the show
had laryngitis.

945
00:47:30,380 --> 00:47:32,018
And the producers came,

946
00:47:32,216 --> 00:47:34,093
"Johnnie, can you
sing 'Over the Rainbow'?"

947
00:47:34,284 --> 00:47:35,854
"Because she can't sing it."

948
00:47:36,053 --> 00:47:37,573
And I had never did
"Over the Rainbow“"

949
00:47:37,721 --> 00:47:39,241
'cause that wasn't
my part of the show.

950
00:47:39,389 --> 00:47:41,528
'Cause I was
the Tin Man, rig ht?

951
00:47:41,725 --> 00:47:43,830
So, I go, "Okay,
yeah, I'll try it."

952
00:47:44,027 --> 00:47:45,768
And so this is the way I did it.

953
00:47:57,975 --> 00:48:03,448
♪ Somewhere over the rainbow

954
00:48:03,647 --> 00:48:06,025
So, then after that I had a son.

955
00:48:06,216 --> 00:48:08,753
And you know what happens
to men when they have boys.

956
00:48:10,087 --> 00:48:10,792
Right?

957
00:48:11,989 --> 00:48:14,026
This woman ran off with my boy.

958
00:48:14,224 --> 00:48:15,794
See, I had taught school.
Like, I said,

959
00:48:15,993 --> 00:48:17,913
Robin Williams was one
of my students and people.

960
00:48:17,928 --> 00:48:20,204
She says, "You got a PhD."

961
00:48:20,397 --> 00:48:22,957
"Go teach school. You don't need
to be making these fuck movies."

962
00:48:23,066 --> 00:48:26,047
I said, "Let me tell you, when I
met you I was making fuck movies."

963
00:48:26,236 --> 00:48:27,716
"That's the reason
why you came to me,"

964
00:48:27,905 --> 00:48:29,232
"'cause you wanted
that big dick, bitch."

965
00:48:29,239 --> 00:48:31,378
"So don't be telling me
about, you know,"

966
00:48:31,575 --> 00:48:33,248
"you want to change my life?"

967
00:48:33,443 --> 00:48:37,084
"You gonna come into my life now
and try to change me?"

968
00:48:37,281 --> 00:48:39,488
I said, "You don't have
that power, woman."

969
00:48:39,650 --> 00:48:41,960
So, the first thing she did
was snatch my son

970
00:48:42,152 --> 00:48:43,631
and take him away from me,

971
00:48:43,820 --> 00:48:45,595
which broke my heart.

972
00:48:47,190 --> 00:48:50,899
And that's when I went and came
up to Washington to raise my boy.

973
00:48:51,094 --> 00:48:53,836
And I raised my boy,
he became a Globetrotter.

974
00:48:54,031 --> 00:48:56,602
He became one of the top
athletes in Washington.

975
00:48:56,800 --> 00:48:58,837
So, I'm proud of that.

976
00:48:59,036 --> 00:49:02,279
I talked to him
last night, right?

977
00:49:02,472 --> 00:49:03,951
He said, "Listen",

978
00:49:04,141 --> 00:49:07,315
"all the motherfuckers gotta go to
the Wikipedia and they see you."

979
00:49:07,511 --> 00:49:08,819
"And they know I'm your son."

980
00:49:09,012 --> 00:49:11,083
He said, "So you don't have
to do it no more, Pops."

981
00:49:11,281 --> 00:49:13,009
He said, "Pops, you don't
have to do that no more."

982
00:49:13,016 --> 00:49:17,123
He said, "'Cause you are
what you are",

983
00:49:17,321 --> 00:49:19,824
"and I am what I am,

984
00:49:20,023 --> 00:49:23,630
"and no matter whatever
comes out in the wash,

985
00:49:23,827 --> 00:49:25,306
we're beautiful."

986
00:49:26,797 --> 00:49:28,105
That's my boy telling me.

987
00:49:28,298 --> 00:49:32,337
♪ Where trouble melts
like lemon drops

988
00:49:34,204 --> 00:49:35,945
I'm not saying I want
to exit porn.

989
00:49:36,139 --> 00:49:39,677
I love porn for what it is
and how it can develop.

990
00:49:39,876 --> 00:49:41,514
And I'm really into, like,

991
00:49:41,712 --> 00:49:44,056
pushing the boundaries
of future porn,

992
00:49:44,247 --> 00:49:46,488
of, like, I don't know,
technologies and stuff.

993
00:49:46,683 --> 00:49:48,211
I'm really into, like,
virtual reality porn

994
00:49:48,218 --> 00:49:49,856
and stuff like that
at the moment.

995
00:49:50,053 --> 00:49:51,381
So, yeah, I'm happy
with what I'm doing,

996
00:49:51,388 --> 00:49:53,959
but eventually I want
to direct and produce films.

997
00:49:54,157 --> 00:49:55,898
And basically
push the boundaries

998
00:49:56,093 --> 00:49:58,369
of what's out there at
the moment technology-wise.

999
00:49:58,562 --> 00:50:01,168
You know? I'm doing a bit with
360 video work at the moment,

1000
00:50:01,365 --> 00:50:02,742
just testing and stuff.

1001
00:50:02,933 --> 00:50:04,894
And hopefully, I think,
that's got a lot of prospect.

1002
00:50:04,901 --> 00:50:07,711
But, yeah, porn's
one of them worlds, man.

1003
00:50:07,904 --> 00:50:10,077
It's ever-evolving
and, you know,

1004
00:50:10,273 --> 00:50:11,768
all the new technologies
are always found,

1005
00:50:11,775 --> 00:50:13,584
and some come and some go.

1006
00:50:13,777 --> 00:50:15,757
And I'm just grateful
to be where I am

1007
00:50:15,946 --> 00:50:18,153
and kind of progressing
with it, you know what I mean?

1008
00:50:18,348 --> 00:50:21,158
So, hopefully one day, I'll be
able to direct and produce films

1009
00:50:21,351 --> 00:50:23,991
and find another big dick kid
like me and change his life, man.

1010
00:50:24,187 --> 00:50:26,224
That's all I want to do.

1011
00:50:49,312 --> 00:50:51,724
What's the
difference between a boy toy, a slave,

1012
00:50:51,915 --> 00:50:54,191
and a fuck buddy
and a boyfriend?

1013
00:50:54,384 --> 00:50:57,422
I've actually had to try to explain
this to my shrinks before.

1014
00:50:59,322 --> 00:51:02,132
Slave boys, they enjoy
the fetter side of things.

1015
00:51:02,325 --> 00:51:07,206
Fuck buddies are people that
would be boyfriends

1016
00:51:07,397 --> 00:51:09,138
if they were better.

1017
00:51:10,300 --> 00:51:12,439
And then boyfriends are people
that you have,

1018
00:51:12,636 --> 00:51:17,881
you know, spiritual, sexual,
emotional relationships with,

1019
00:51:18,075 --> 00:51:20,214
and, you know, you're
intimate and vulnerable,

1020
00:51:20,410 --> 00:51:21,946
and all of that
kind of fun stuff.

1021
00:51:22,145 --> 00:51:24,140
And the boy toys are just
supposed to shut the fuck up,

1022
00:51:24,147 --> 00:51:26,923
be cute and pretty and do
as mistress mommy tells them to.

1023
00:51:33,290 --> 00:51:40,071
I always wanted a smooth-running
machine of a business,

1024
00:51:40,263 --> 00:51:41,606
like that was always my goal.

1025
00:51:41,798 --> 00:51:43,278
I remember, like,
asking people, like,

1026
00:51:43,366 --> 00:51:45,361
"How do you get into porn?
How do you get into porn?"

1027
00:51:45,368 --> 00:51:48,781
And then I ended up
doing a photo shoot

1028
00:51:48,972 --> 00:51:51,782
with High Society
and Cherry Magazine in Jamaica.

1029
00:51:51,975 --> 00:51:54,979
And who was my roommate?
Jenna Jameson was.

1030
00:51:55,178 --> 00:51:58,091
So, she's like, "You need to
move to LA and live with me",

1031
00:51:58,281 --> 00:51:59,351
and I'll hook you up."

1032
00:51:59,549 --> 00:52:02,189
And, you know, I was taking
care of my mother at that time.

1033
00:52:02,385 --> 00:52:04,194
And I told my mom that we were

1034
00:52:04,387 --> 00:52:06,594
gonna be moving
to Hollywood, Florida.

1035
00:52:06,790 --> 00:52:10,033
So I'm in Jamaica
and I call my mom up,

1036
00:52:10,227 --> 00:52:12,366
and I'm like, "Mom,
we're moving to Hollywood!"

1037
00:52:12,562 --> 00:52:15,008
And she's like, "Yeah, I know."
I'm like, "Scratch."

1038
00:52:15,198 --> 00:52:17,439
"Hollywood, California."

1039
00:52:17,634 --> 00:52:18,669
She's like, "What?"

1040
00:52:18,869 --> 00:52:21,816
I was 23 and I decided
to open up,

1041
00:52:22,005 --> 00:52:24,508
you know,
a 5,000 square-foot studio,

1042
00:52:24,708 --> 00:52:26,210
make it a rental facility.

1043
00:52:26,409 --> 00:52:28,286
And I started rig ht after that

1044
00:52:28,478 --> 00:52:30,617
my first Web site
and then, you know,

1045
00:52:30,814 --> 00:52:32,452
decided to do a whole
network of them

1046
00:52:32,649 --> 00:52:34,458
and all different
kinds of fetishes.

1047
00:52:34,651 --> 00:52:36,130
It was called
"The Niche Bitch."

1048
00:52:36,319 --> 00:52:37,855
I had the Niche Bitch network.

1049
00:52:38,054 --> 00:52:39,055
And it went from there.

1050
00:52:39,256 --> 00:52:41,327
Then the whole gonzo thing
kind of started

1051
00:52:41,525 --> 00:52:44,028
when you started having, like,
digital cameras.

1052
00:52:44,227 --> 00:52:46,901
And everybody else
used to call it,

1053
00:52:47,097 --> 00:52:51,546
um, the actual civilian
term for it...

1054
00:52:51,735 --> 00:52:53,646
"civilian" meaning you people-

1055
00:52:53,837 --> 00:52:56,681
...um, non porn stars,

1056
00:52:56,873 --> 00:52:58,079
uh, it was called Pro-Am.

1057
00:52:58,241 --> 00:53:01,484
Which really all it meant was
there was a bunch of idiots

1058
00:53:01,678 --> 00:53:02,986
that used to be porn stars

1059
00:53:03,180 --> 00:53:05,558
that had picked up a camera,
myself included...

1060
00:53:07,517 --> 00:53:09,087
...but mostly it was all guys.

1061
00:53:09,286 --> 00:53:12,165
Because, once again, it was
a very, very

1062
00:53:12,355 --> 00:53:15,165
boys' school business back then.

1063
00:53:15,358 --> 00:53:19,204
I mean, it was all Italian mafia
that did distribution,

1064
00:53:19,396 --> 00:53:21,933
and it was all Jewish mafia
that did production,

1065
00:53:22,132 --> 00:53:25,875
and women were not allowed
to kind of get in there,

1066
00:53:26,069 --> 00:53:27,742
especially distribution,
you know.

1067
00:53:27,938 --> 00:53:31,784
So, but anyways,
there was a film,

1068
00:53:31,975 --> 00:53:33,886
I think it was called "Erocity,"

1069
00:53:34,077 --> 00:53:39,550
where I was raping the fuck out
of this guy's ass in my dungeon,

1070
00:53:39,749 --> 00:53:42,696
and it was really hilarious

1071
00:53:42,886 --> 00:53:44,456
because I broke
my discipline horse.

1072
00:53:44,654 --> 00:53:48,466
And I just kept pounding that
motherfucker into the ground.

1073
00:53:48,658 --> 00:53:51,764
And it was so funny 'cause the
director afterwards was like,

1074
00:53:51,962 --> 00:53:54,408
"You didn't miss a beat."

1075
00:53:54,598 --> 00:53:58,478
And I'd always have, you know,
these soirée affairs,

1076
00:53:58,668 --> 00:54:02,241
and I'd have a curator with
all these fetish kind of an,

1077
00:54:02,439 --> 00:54:04,316
and I'd have these
custom-made outfits,

1078
00:54:04,507 --> 00:54:05,507
and I'd have an open bar.

1079
00:54:05,675 --> 00:54:08,485
And then, you know, I'd be
double-fisting somebody

1080
00:54:08,678 --> 00:54:11,215
in the dungeon downstairs.

1081
00:54:11,414 --> 00:54:13,155
And, you know, my mom
would be upstairs,

1082
00:54:13,316 --> 00:54:15,421
and she's like,
"I'm so proud of my daughter."

1083
00:54:15,619 --> 00:54:18,225
And they're like, "Do you know
what she's doing downstairs?"

1084
00:54:18,421 --> 00:54:20,101
"I don't care. I'm just
very proud of her."

1085
00:54:20,190 --> 00:54:23,501
I know I'm hypocritical

1086
00:54:23,693 --> 00:54:26,799
'cause I'm a dominatrix and
I beat the shit out of men,

1087
00:54:26,997 --> 00:54:30,240
but I just feel like it's appropriate
doing it to a man but not a woman.

1088
00:54:30,433 --> 00:54:33,748
Call me cray-cray,
it's the feminist in me.

1089
00:54:36,673 --> 00:54:38,516
- Sam?
- Yeah?

1090
00:54:38,708 --> 00:54:41,985
How about you come over here
and sit besides me on this couch

1091
00:54:42,178 --> 00:54:47,355
and show me some of that
Sam Slate private dick?

1092
00:54:47,550 --> 00:54:49,029
Thought you'd never ask me.

1093
00:54:54,991 --> 00:54:56,993
I feel like now
when I watch porn,

1094
00:54:57,193 --> 00:54:58,913
it's like, you know,
fucking her in the ass,

1095
00:54:58,962 --> 00:55:00,270
and choking her and, you know,

1096
00:55:00,463 --> 00:55:03,273
having as many cocks
as you possibly can,

1097
00:55:03,466 --> 00:55:06,106
and it's all this spit
and put her head in the toilet.

1098
00:55:06,303 --> 00:55:09,216
And I am not down
with that program.

1099
00:55:09,406 --> 00:55:11,647
So when I had
originally retired,

1100
00:55:11,841 --> 00:55:15,118
because all porn stars, we come
back and we...

1101
00:55:15,312 --> 00:55:17,006
That's what we do,
we leave and we come back.

1102
00:55:17,013 --> 00:55:18,686
But when I originally retired,

1103
00:55:18,882 --> 00:55:24,127
I had no problem doing it
because the business that I knew

1104
00:55:24,321 --> 00:55:28,394
where you actually had sex,
like, on beds and desks,

1105
00:55:28,591 --> 00:55:31,197
and, you know, and it was like,
you were having sex.

1106
00:55:31,394 --> 00:55:33,374
It was, like, good.

1107
00:55:33,563 --> 00:55:37,705
Now, oh my God, I need to do
a sitz bath afterwards.

1108
00:55:37,901 --> 00:55:39,574
I mean, they freaking kill you.

1109
00:55:39,769 --> 00:55:43,012
It's like, it's all about
pounding you into the next room,

1110
00:55:43,206 --> 00:55:44,412
and choking you.

1111
00:55:44,607 --> 00:55:46,018
They don't do that shit to me.

1112
00:55:46,209 --> 00:55:48,348
Because I will turn around
and clock the motherfucker.

1113
00:55:48,545 --> 00:55:50,650
'Cause I am a dominant woman
and I'm older.

1114
00:55:50,847 --> 00:55:52,849
Respect your elders, beyotch.

1115
00:55:56,419 --> 00:55:58,831
I had been retired
for quite a few years

1116
00:55:59,022 --> 00:56:00,865
and a director contacted me,

1117
00:56:01,057 --> 00:56:03,697
not knowing that I had
been retired.

1118
00:56:03,893 --> 00:56:06,430
And he's like, "Oh, you know,
I was wondering, you know",

1119
00:56:06,629 --> 00:56:08,404
"I had a scene that I
wanted you to be in."

1120
00:56:10,133 --> 00:56:12,414
And I was like, "Okay, well,
what's the name of the film?"

1121
00:56:12,535 --> 00:56:13,429
And he's like, "Golden Girls."

1122
00:56:13,436 --> 00:56:15,279
I'm like,
"You're a fucking jerkoff!"

1123
00:56:21,244 --> 00:56:24,350
Dude calls me back, like,
a year later and he goes,

1124
00:56:24,547 --> 00:56:26,390
"I got your comeback film."

1125
00:56:26,583 --> 00:56:29,393
I'm like, "Get the fuck
outta here."

1126
00:56:29,586 --> 00:56:32,362
"Didn't think I'd be hearing
from you again," and...

1127
00:56:35,425 --> 00:56:38,133
Do you want a piece
of me, you little bitch?

1128
00:56:38,795 --> 00:56:39,967
What?

1129
00:56:40,163 --> 00:56:42,268
"Sex and the City,"
I want you to play Samantha.

1130
00:56:42,465 --> 00:56:44,911
I'm like,
"Dude, I like you, man."

1131
00:56:45,101 --> 00:56:48,878
So, I got to do
that particular movie,

1132
00:56:49,072 --> 00:56:51,279
and I had realized
it had been a while

1133
00:56:51,474 --> 00:56:53,317
since I'd been on camera.

1134
00:56:53,476 --> 00:56:56,787
I had maybe done, like, two
anal scenes in my entire life.

1135
00:56:56,980 --> 00:56:58,340
So I said I would
do an anal scene.

1136
00:56:58,448 --> 00:56:59,984
But I'm not a pro at this.

1137
00:57:00,150 --> 00:57:03,393
God bless all of the men
out there that think that,

1138
00:57:03,586 --> 00:57:06,157
you know, there's not a lot of
preparation that goes into this.

1139
00:57:06,356 --> 00:57:09,496
Let me tell you something,
there... there needs to be.

1140
00:57:09,692 --> 00:57:11,672
Oh, you dirty, naughty boy.

1141
00:57:11,828 --> 00:57:14,775
- You wanna fuck my ass?
- Yeah, I wanna fuck that ass.

1142
00:57:14,964 --> 00:57:16,238
Oh, yeah.

1143
00:57:16,433 --> 00:57:18,413
Shove that big cock in my ass.

1144
00:57:18,601 --> 00:57:20,401
It's like, 10:00 a.m.
and you're having, like,

1145
00:57:20,537 --> 00:57:23,177
a 20-inch cock shoved
into your ass, right?

1146
00:57:23,373 --> 00:57:26,252
And, you know, I haven't had
anything in my own booty

1147
00:57:26,443 --> 00:57:28,320
for, like, a long time.

1148
00:57:28,478 --> 00:57:30,518
I'm in the bathroom
talking to a girlfriend of mine.

1149
00:57:30,547 --> 00:57:32,993
"Allison, something
happened to my ass."

1150
00:57:33,183 --> 00:57:34,610
She's like, "What are
you talking about?"

1151
00:57:34,617 --> 00:57:36,212
I'm like, "There's something
wrong with my ass."

1152
00:57:36,219 --> 00:57:37,647
She's like, "What are
you talking about?"

1153
00:57:37,654 --> 00:57:39,348
I'm like, "No, there's
really something, like",

1154
00:57:39,355 --> 00:57:42,495
"like, I think my ass
flipped inside out or-Yeah."

1155
00:57:42,692 --> 00:57:44,638
And she's like,
"What are you talking..."

1156
00:57:44,828 --> 00:57:48,139
I'm like...
"Something's wrong with my ass."

1157
00:57:48,331 --> 00:57:49,935
And so, sure enough,

1158
00:57:50,133 --> 00:57:51,612
I go back on set, you know,

1159
00:57:51,801 --> 00:57:54,145
and I'm like, got my legs
together and I'm scooting in,

1160
00:57:54,337 --> 00:57:56,840
and they're like,
"Uh, are you okay?"

1161
00:57:57,040 --> 00:57:58,678
And I'm like, "Um..."

1162
00:58:00,376 --> 00:58:01,855
"Something happened to my ass."

1163
00:58:02,045 --> 00:58:04,548
And they're like,
"Oh, not a big deal.

1164
00:58:04,747 --> 00:58:06,158
You're just rosebudding it."

1165
00:58:06,349 --> 00:58:08,556
I'm like,
"What is rosebudding it?"

1166
00:58:08,751 --> 00:58:12,164
And they're like, "Well,
it's when you have a prolapse",

1167
00:58:12,355 --> 00:58:14,035
"you know, like,
your ass, like, prolapsed.

1168
00:58:14,157 --> 00:58:16,569
"It flips inside out." Right?

1169
00:58:16,759 --> 00:58:19,569
And I'm like,
"Oh, no, this is not good."

1170
00:58:19,762 --> 00:58:21,357
They're like,
"Oh, don't worry about it."

1171
00:58:21,364 --> 00:58:23,742
"There's like a ton of girls
in the industry"

1172
00:58:23,933 --> 00:58:25,844
"that have permanent rosebud."

1173
00:58:26,035 --> 00:58:30,677
"There's like a whole prolapse
fetish genre of film."

1174
00:58:30,874 --> 00:58:35,414
And I'm like, "No..."

1175
00:58:35,612 --> 00:58:39,389
The next time I did an anal
scene, I prepared for a month.

1176
00:58:40,750 --> 00:58:42,593
Have you put any restrictions

1177
00:58:42,785 --> 00:58:44,526
on what you're willing
to do on video?

1178
00:58:44,721 --> 00:58:46,428
Um, at this point
in time I have.

1179
00:58:46,623 --> 00:58:52,096
I won't do any anals
or gangbangs,

1180
00:58:52,295 --> 00:58:53,535
and that's pretty much it.

1181
00:58:53,730 --> 00:58:55,573
And the only reason is, is...

1182
00:58:57,267 --> 00:59:01,010
...it's more, like, a business
thing than anything else.

1183
00:59:01,204 --> 00:59:04,083
I figure I have to have
something left

1184
00:59:04,274 --> 00:59:06,413
when... to market
a little bit later on.

1185
00:59:06,609 --> 00:59:11,285
So, you'll probably see me doing it a
little bit later, but not quite yet.

1186
00:59:11,481 --> 00:59:13,017
Gonna make you wait for it.

1187
00:59:13,216 --> 00:59:14,354
Do you do it off camera?

1188
00:59:14,551 --> 00:59:16,929
Oh, definitely. Uh-huh, uh-huh.
Mm-hmm. Definitely.

1189
00:59:17,120 --> 00:59:18,480
Well, I don't know
about gangbangs.

1190
00:59:18,621 --> 00:59:21,033
I don't really usually get into
a gang bang situation

1191
00:59:21,224 --> 00:59:22,703
all that often.

1192
00:59:22,892 --> 00:59:24,530
Um, but anal sex,

1193
00:59:24,727 --> 00:59:28,038
I do try get it in
every once in a blue moon.

1194
00:59:29,732 --> 00:59:32,440
I'd been producing
and directing for 15 years,

1195
00:59:32,635 --> 00:59:34,376
and I thought,
"Well, you know what?"

1196
00:59:34,571 --> 00:59:36,551
"Why don't I understand
the theory"

1197
00:59:36,739 --> 00:59:39,879
"of what I've actually been
doing for the last 15 years."

1198
00:59:40,076 --> 00:59:42,317
Sol moved to New York

1199
00:59:42,512 --> 00:59:46,654
and I started going to
the New York Film Academy.

1200
00:59:46,849 --> 00:59:50,558
I did two years of producing,
one year of directing.

1201
00:59:50,753 --> 00:59:53,563
It was funny 'cause they would
go on my IMDB page

1202
00:59:53,756 --> 00:59:57,670
and, you know, there's these
19-year-old film school boys,

1203
00:59:57,860 --> 01:00:00,739
and they're like, "Oh my God!
You have 1,000 credits?"

1204
01:00:02,265 --> 01:00:05,576
"Your IMDB page is so big
and massive and huge.

1205
01:00:05,768 --> 01:00:07,611
"Wow!" You know.

1206
01:00:07,804 --> 01:00:10,700
So yeah, when I realized that independent
filmmaking was not going to continue

1207
01:00:10,707 --> 01:00:14,280
making me the rich bitch that
I'm used to being...

1208
01:00:17,480 --> 01:00:19,084
Maybe I should DJ?

1209
01:00:19,282 --> 01:00:20,784
Workaholic slash
rave chick girl.

1210
01:00:20,984 --> 01:00:23,658
Work my ass off, work hard,
play hard kind of thing.

1211
01:00:26,856 --> 01:00:29,496
I was always billed out
as the porn star DJ.

1212
01:00:29,692 --> 01:00:31,354
But then I've also been
in "Playboy" magazine,

1213
01:00:31,361 --> 01:00:32,999
so also "Playboy" DJ.

1214
01:00:33,196 --> 01:00:39,511
And, you know, now I get to just
be a talented scam artist DJ.

1215
01:00:39,702 --> 01:00:45,675
I've not had any issue
with my past being negative.

1216
01:00:45,875 --> 01:00:47,548
It's actually been
the exact opposite.

1217
01:00:47,744 --> 01:00:50,953
I've utilized all
the tools and connections

1218
01:00:51,147 --> 01:00:52,353
and things like that

1219
01:00:52,548 --> 01:00:55,529
in whatever new businesses
that I start now.

1220
01:00:55,718 --> 01:00:57,789
I am very happy that I was

1221
01:00:57,987 --> 01:01:00,558
a pan of
the "golden age of porn."

1222
01:01:00,757 --> 01:01:03,203
Very happy.
'Cause, you know what?

1223
01:01:03,393 --> 01:01:05,134
I don't know if I
could do it nowadays.

1224
01:01:05,328 --> 01:01:08,741
I really don't know if I could.

1225
01:01:18,708 --> 01:01:22,850
Most men involved
in the industry,

1226
01:01:23,046 --> 01:01:25,219
outside of most of the talent,

1227
01:01:25,381 --> 01:01:27,486
I don't think
they're pro-women.

1228
01:01:27,684 --> 01:01:28,844
I don't think they like women.

1229
01:01:28,851 --> 01:01:33,857
I think that they get off on
having power over women.

1230
01:01:34,057 --> 01:01:35,559
But it also creates money,

1231
01:01:35,758 --> 01:01:38,068
so, you know, that's my opinion.

1232
01:01:38,261 --> 01:01:40,571
I don't think it's...

1233
01:01:40,763 --> 01:01:44,609
It's far from the most honorable
industry that ever existed.

1234
01:01:51,374 --> 01:01:55,015
Long-term, I'm actually
doing my Web site now.

1235
01:01:55,211 --> 01:01:57,088
Eventually, I want
to keep doing it,

1236
01:01:57,280 --> 01:02:00,284
but, I mean, if something
else comes up,

1237
01:02:00,450 --> 01:02:01,690
that'd be cool too, but...

1238
01:02:01,884 --> 01:02:04,084
I want to eventually, like,
hire people to do it for me,

1239
01:02:04,153 --> 01:02:06,690
so, like, I don't have to do it
anymore, you know what I mean?

1240
01:02:06,889 --> 01:02:10,598
Like, have my own site
and pay girls to do stuff.

1241
01:02:10,793 --> 01:02:12,602
Or men.
So that I don't have to, like...

1242
01:02:12,795 --> 01:02:14,490
I can be, like,
a director basically, you know?

1243
01:02:14,497 --> 01:02:15,737
That'd be cool.

1244
01:02:17,967 --> 01:02:19,071
Back up this way now.

1245
01:02:19,268 --> 01:02:20,542
Yeah, nice.

1246
01:02:20,737 --> 01:02:22,239
Can you bring 'em
underneath yourself?

1247
01:02:22,438 --> 01:02:23,815
Yeah? Let's pop those out.

1248
01:02:24,006 --> 01:02:25,713
Beautiful.
Okay, good.

1249
01:02:25,908 --> 01:02:27,819
That's it.
Drop that shoulder.

1250
01:02:28,010 --> 01:02:28,784
Yeah, nice.

1251
01:02:28,978 --> 01:02:31,822
Bring your left shoulder
to me just a little bit.

1252
01:02:32,014 --> 01:02:33,891
Rig ht there.
Yeah, very strong.

1253
01:02:34,083 --> 01:02:36,120
Beautiful.
Rig ht there, good.

1254
01:02:39,422 --> 01:02:40,924
Do you like this job so far?

1255
01:02:41,124 --> 01:02:43,764
I love this job so far.

1256
01:02:43,960 --> 01:02:45,462
Are there certain aspects

1257
01:02:45,661 --> 01:02:47,834
of this kind of work
that you dislike?

1258
01:02:48,030 --> 01:02:50,977
Yeah, but the likes
outweigh the dislikes.

1259
01:02:58,307 --> 01:03:00,685
What's going on in
the life of Chasey Lain?

1260
01:03:00,877 --> 01:03:03,483
Right now I'm out here working.

1261
01:03:03,679 --> 01:03:04,959
I do two weeks on,
two weeks off.

1262
01:03:05,014 --> 01:03:08,461
And I'm giving some love to
Dennis here at the BunnyRanch.

1263
01:03:08,651 --> 01:03:09,925
There it is.

1264
01:03:10,119 --> 01:03:11,647
And a lot of love
to a lot of fans out there?

1265
01:03:11,654 --> 01:03:16,160
Yeah. Anybody can come, swing on
by and we'll have a good time.

1266
01:03:16,359 --> 01:03:17,770
There you go.
So, are you...

1267
01:03:17,960 --> 01:03:19,955
Are you still doing movies
or are you done with that?

1268
01:03:19,962 --> 01:03:21,669
Mmm, I don't
know if I'm done with it.

1269
01:03:21,864 --> 01:03:24,042
I'm not shooting right now.
- OK.

1270
01:03:34,510 --> 01:03:39,391
Off and on, I went to the
BunnyRanch for a minute and worked.

1271
01:03:39,582 --> 01:03:41,892
I don't have
any problem with Dennis.

1272
01:03:42,084 --> 01:03:44,826
It's just that it's not for me,

1273
01:03:45,021 --> 01:03:47,194
'cause it's really
way far out of town,

1274
01:03:47,390 --> 01:03:50,701
and I don't like
the money split there.

1275
01:03:50,893 --> 01:03:52,531
They take half of everything

1276
01:03:52,728 --> 01:03:54,901
and then charge you
for room and board

1277
01:03:55,097 --> 01:03:57,703
and different stuff as well.

1278
01:03:58,868 --> 01:04:02,645
And it gets real slow
during Christmas

1279
01:04:02,839 --> 01:04:05,012
'cause it gets real cold there
and it snows and stuff.

1280
01:04:05,208 --> 01:04:09,520
So sometimes there would be
days, two, three, four days

1281
01:04:09,712 --> 01:04:11,749
and not one person
would walk in the door.

1282
01:04:11,948 --> 01:04:16,328
So you end up having to stay a little
bit longer than you would have

1283
01:04:16,519 --> 01:04:18,328
'cause you're upside down
to the house.

1284
01:04:18,521 --> 01:04:21,934
'Cause every day that you're there,
they charge you room and board

1285
01:04:22,124 --> 01:04:23,569
and this and that.

1286
01:04:23,759 --> 01:04:27,536
<i>The adult business
and the escort business</i>

1287
01:04:27,730 --> 01:04:28,936
are two separate businesses.

1288
01:04:29,131 --> 01:04:30,691
They want nothing
to do with each other.

1289
01:04:30,733 --> 01:04:32,940
In fact, years back,
if you were escorting,

1290
01:04:33,135 --> 01:04:35,945
you were blackballed
in the adult industry.

1291
01:04:36,138 --> 01:04:37,947
They would never
hire you again on set

1292
01:04:38,140 --> 01:04:39,535
if they found out
you were escorting.

1293
01:04:39,542 --> 01:04:42,546
You're supposed to be untouchable
when you're doing film.

1294
01:04:42,745 --> 01:04:45,123
And so that means not
everybody can get to you

1295
01:04:45,314 --> 01:04:47,021
to shoot you or...

1296
01:04:47,216 --> 01:04:49,457
not everybody could get
to you to have sex with you.

1297
01:04:49,652 --> 01:04:52,963
Otherwise, why would you
buy the video?

1298
01:04:53,155 --> 01:04:55,115
The video has to be the only
place they can get it

1299
01:04:55,258 --> 01:04:56,635
or it won't sell.

1300
01:04:57,727 --> 01:05:00,799
My free time,
I like to spend shopping.

1301
01:05:02,131 --> 01:05:07,444
With my son.
or, um...

1302
01:05:07,637 --> 01:05:09,810
Relaxing. I like my horses

1303
01:05:10,006 --> 01:05:11,076
and, you know.

1304
01:05:11,274 --> 01:05:13,914
Are you a clothes girl?
Or are you a shoes girl?

1305
01:05:14,110 --> 01:05:15,783
I'm shoes. I'm shoes.

1306
01:05:15,978 --> 01:05:17,889
- You have a big collection?
- I'm a shoes girl.

1307
01:05:18,080 --> 01:05:18,888
I do.

1308
01:05:19,081 --> 01:05:22,494
Huge. 800 or so pair.

1309
01:05:22,685 --> 01:05:24,824
Any particular brand
in particular?

1310
01:05:25,021 --> 01:05:26,625
Not in particular.

1311
01:05:26,822 --> 01:05:29,393
It's every brand. Every pair.

1312
01:05:29,592 --> 01:05:34,007
My contracts progressively got
better throughout the years.

1313
01:05:34,196 --> 01:05:36,836
Dancing progressively
got better too.

1314
01:05:37,033 --> 01:05:41,004
I got a base pay and then
I got two rooms and two tickets.

1315
01:05:41,203 --> 01:05:43,843
'Cause I didn't share a room
with my roadie.

1316
01:05:44,006 --> 01:05:46,987
And I don't take a split
on merchandise either.

1317
01:05:47,176 --> 01:05:49,638
Some of the clubs want to take,
like, half your money.

1318
01:05:49,645 --> 01:05:51,607
Some of the clubs want to take,
like, half your money.

1319
01:05:51,614 --> 01:05:53,457
Yeah, I had my own toy line,

1320
01:05:53,649 --> 01:05:55,128
and I had my own line
of realistics,

1321
01:05:55,318 --> 01:05:57,855
vibrators, and love gels, so.

1322
01:05:58,054 --> 01:06:01,467
They molded my hands,
my face, my crotch,

1323
01:06:01,657 --> 01:06:03,933
my feet...

1324
01:06:04,126 --> 01:06:06,003
my whole body, I guess.

1325
01:06:07,229 --> 01:06:11,109
There were 25 products
out on the market.

1326
01:06:11,300 --> 01:06:15,214
I would get checks
every two, three months

1327
01:06:15,404 --> 01:06:18,010
for like, 60,000

1328
01:06:18,207 --> 01:06:19,948
and stuff like that.

1329
01:06:20,142 --> 01:06:24,215
I'm old school. You absolutely
know that gonzo's not my favorite.

1330
01:06:24,413 --> 01:06:27,121
It's something with a
script and a plot.

1331
01:06:27,316 --> 01:06:29,694
But see, most
people would be surprised

1332
01:06:29,885 --> 01:06:32,024
that'd you want
to have a script and...

1333
01:06:33,055 --> 01:06:34,864
It's so much easier
to go by a script,

1334
01:06:35,057 --> 01:06:37,097
and you're going to work
to pretend to do something,

1335
01:06:37,259 --> 01:06:38,179
to be something, to do.

1336
01:06:38,327 --> 01:06:41,137
I mean, it's an entire act,
so why not?

1337
01:06:41,330 --> 01:06:43,158
I mean, yeah, of course
I'd like to have a script,

1338
01:06:43,165 --> 01:06:45,975
something to actually do,
work on.

1339
01:06:46,168 --> 01:06:49,513
Not just... plop up
camera there.

1340
01:06:49,705 --> 01:06:52,345
That takes all the mad
movie magic out of it.

1341
01:06:53,709 --> 01:06:55,382
Yeah, the Internet wasn't around

1342
01:06:55,578 --> 01:06:57,990
when I first got
into the business,

1343
01:06:58,180 --> 01:07:02,185
and then it destroyed
the business pretty much.

1344
01:07:02,385 --> 01:07:05,696
People can just look at the Internet
and get whatever they want for free.

1345
01:07:05,888 --> 01:07:08,926
There's no need to put any kind of
production value into anything.

1346
01:07:09,091 --> 01:07:11,731
There's no need to pay
an extra penny for anything

1347
01:07:11,927 --> 01:07:16,069
when it's being shoved
down your throat for free.

1348
01:07:16,265 --> 01:07:19,838
The same opportunities
are not available now

1349
01:07:20,036 --> 01:07:21,743
that were then.

1350
01:07:21,937 --> 01:07:23,610
I produced
an all-girls line

1351
01:07:23,806 --> 01:07:25,513
for Vivid called "Chasin' Pink"

1352
01:07:25,708 --> 01:07:27,949
and my budgets were $30,000.

1353
01:07:28,144 --> 01:07:31,614
I mean, that was
considered gonzo.

1354
01:07:31,814 --> 01:07:35,125
My "gonzo,"
my $30,000 "gonzo."

1355
01:07:36,218 --> 01:07:39,062
I mean, have you seen
the stuff that's up there?

1356
01:07:40,089 --> 01:07:41,796
I mean, I uh...
Last time I checked,

1357
01:07:41,991 --> 01:07:46,406
Bang Brothers didn't have
a whole elaborate setup.

1358
01:07:46,595 --> 01:07:48,802
It's different now.
I mean, they shoot something

1359
01:07:48,998 --> 01:07:50,944
in their living room
and throw it on the Internet

1360
01:07:51,133 --> 01:07:52,294
and then now
they're a porn star.

1361
01:07:52,301 --> 01:07:54,907
Well, it's not really
paying your dues.

1362
01:07:56,238 --> 01:07:57,216
But okay.

1363
01:07:58,340 --> 01:08:00,980
What would you like to do
after adult films?

1364
01:08:02,678 --> 01:08:04,817
Is there life after adult films?

1365
01:08:05,014 --> 01:08:07,119
I don't know.

1366
01:08:07,316 --> 01:08:09,318
I don't think so, but...

1367
01:08:09,518 --> 01:08:13,091
Right. Um, next question.

1368
01:08:13,289 --> 01:08:16,133
How would you judge
the future of porn in general?

1369
01:08:17,960 --> 01:08:22,136
I think the future of porn...

1370
01:08:22,331 --> 01:08:28,009
Well, my Lord, it's the oldest
profession that there is,

1371
01:08:28,204 --> 01:08:31,117
sol pretty much think
it's just gonna get better.

1372
01:08:33,175 --> 01:08:35,485
Yeah, it would take money
to do another scene.

1373
01:08:35,678 --> 01:08:39,182
I mean, the companies now
just aren't really paying.

1374
01:08:39,381 --> 01:08:42,123
If I wanted to shoot
every day, I could.

1375
01:08:42,318 --> 01:08:44,594
I'm just not interested
in shooting every day

1376
01:08:44,787 --> 01:08:50,931
because I don't really like to
do interracial scenes too much.

1377
01:08:51,127 --> 01:08:52,868
I don't want to shoot anal.

1378
01:08:53,062 --> 01:08:55,372
And so, that's mostly
what they're shooting

1379
01:08:55,564 --> 01:08:57,373
and I'm just not interested
in shooting that.

1380
01:08:57,533 --> 01:09:00,013
And so, I don't.

1381
01:09:00,202 --> 01:09:04,150
I mean, I've done adult
for a long, long time.

1382
01:09:04,340 --> 01:09:07,844
I mean, there's other things
that can be done

1383
01:09:08,043 --> 01:09:09,818
that I'm also interested in

1384
01:09:10,012 --> 01:09:12,288
that I would like to do

1385
01:09:12,481 --> 01:09:15,018
since the adult business
doesn't exist anymore.

1386
01:09:15,217 --> 01:09:17,288
Since... Let it go to bed.

1387
01:09:17,486 --> 01:09:18,988
- It's for you.
- Oh!

1388
01:09:20,589 --> 01:09:22,227
- Hello?
- Allison?

1389
01:09:22,424 --> 01:09:23,835
Fame is real.

1390
01:09:24,026 --> 01:09:26,734
Fame is fun.

1391
01:09:26,929 --> 01:09:33,175
I made it so I'd get recognized
when I go to the grocery store.

1392
01:09:35,838 --> 01:09:40,218
Everybody's your
best friend when...

1393
01:09:41,844 --> 01:09:43,084
...when you're a star.

1394
01:09:47,449 --> 01:09:48,894
A person who is paid for sex

1395
01:09:49,084 --> 01:09:53,055
doesn't necessarily have any negative
repercussions from that act.

1396
01:09:53,255 --> 01:09:55,667
And some of the things
people have investigated,

1397
01:09:55,858 --> 01:09:58,737
for example, are things like
post-traumatic stress disorder,

1398
01:09:58,928 --> 01:10:00,271
anxiety disorders.

1399
01:10:00,462 --> 01:10:03,068
And while they may occur more
frequently in that population,

1400
01:10:03,265 --> 01:10:05,745
there's no evidence that
their receiving sex for money

1401
01:10:05,901 --> 01:10:08,347
caused that problem for them.

1402
01:10:08,537 --> 01:10:12,349
Let's say I'm some
unemployed guy or something

1403
01:10:12,541 --> 01:10:15,385
in the middle of the country
living in a trailer park,

1404
01:10:15,578 --> 01:10:18,684
but I have the ware-for-all to
be able to save $100 a week up

1405
01:10:18,881 --> 01:10:20,292
so that on
my birthday next year,

1406
01:10:20,482 --> 01:10:24,555
I can buy my favorite hooker
or porn star for an hour.

1407
01:10:24,753 --> 01:10:28,929
Okay, she just fell off that
pedestal, in my opinion.

1408
01:10:29,124 --> 01:10:32,901
And she became less valuable
to the industry.

1409
01:10:33,963 --> 01:10:36,204
As soon as someone can have you

1410
01:10:36,398 --> 01:10:39,208
for a price
outside the industry,

1411
01:10:39,401 --> 01:10:41,312
your value to the industry
goes down.

1412
01:10:41,503 --> 01:10:46,316
However, the models use
our industry and our sites

1413
01:10:46,508 --> 01:10:49,489
and the scenes as advertising

1414
01:10:49,678 --> 01:10:53,785
that they're still
an active adult film star.

1415
01:10:53,983 --> 01:10:57,055
People think that once you
do a porn, it's like over with,

1416
01:10:57,253 --> 01:10:58,288
but it's really not.

1417
01:10:58,487 --> 01:11:01,127
Once you do porn, it actually
opens up a door to...

1418
01:11:01,323 --> 01:11:03,803
I walk around, and I'm walking

1419
01:11:03,993 --> 01:11:05,273
in the like street
the other day,

1420
01:11:05,327 --> 01:11:07,830
and I was just crossing
the like, road.

1421
01:11:08,030 --> 01:11:09,771
I'm crossing the road
and a guy yells out

1422
01:11:09,965 --> 01:11:13,139
by car, "I fucking hate you,
Donny Sins. You son of a bitch."

1423
01:11:13,335 --> 01:11:14,255
I'm like,
"Who are you?"

1424
01:11:14,436 --> 01:11:16,476
He's like, "I watched you
on Dogfart the other day."

1425
01:11:16,639 --> 01:11:18,949
"You were fucking
this blonde chick that I love

1426
01:11:19,141 --> 01:11:20,541
and I never got
to fuck her before."

1427
01:11:20,709 --> 01:11:23,451
And you're like... It opens up avenues
for you, you know what I mean?

1428
01:11:23,646 --> 01:11:25,956
And then it's funny enough
that he cursed me out

1429
01:11:26,148 --> 01:11:28,043
and then offered me
a fucking ride down the street.

1430
01:11:28,050 --> 01:11:29,210
And I'm like, "No, I'm fine."

1431
01:11:29,318 --> 01:11:31,264
It's a nice day.
I would rather walk."

1432
01:11:45,534 --> 01:11:48,140
Okay, red light's on.
We're recording.

1433
01:11:51,540 --> 01:11:52,280
All right.

1434
01:11:52,474 --> 01:11:54,784
I have no idea
if this is even working.

1435
01:11:54,977 --> 01:11:56,979
I don't know
what the hell I'm doing.

1436
01:11:57,179 --> 01:11:59,181
I just want to make
a tape, okay?

1437
01:11:59,348 --> 01:12:02,352
So, here's me.

1438
01:12:02,551 --> 01:12:04,053
Hope you like it.

1439
01:12:04,253 --> 01:12:07,700
Sit back, relax, and enjoy
the feature presentation.

1440
01:12:07,890 --> 01:12:08,834
Shit.

1441
01:12:09,024 --> 01:12:10,196
This thing on?

1442
01:12:10,392 --> 01:12:12,201
How the hell
am I gonna shut it off?

1443
01:12:15,564 --> 01:12:18,204
And Tabitha, what about you?
You're in porno.

1444
01:12:18,400 --> 01:12:19,879
What age did
you start doing porno?

1445
01:12:20,069 --> 01:12:22,208
I started at 25.
I'm 31.

1446
01:12:22,404 --> 01:12:24,406
- You're 31 years old...
- 25 is a late start!

1447
01:12:24,606 --> 01:12:25,726
You're a late starter, yeah.

1448
01:12:25,908 --> 01:12:27,908
The way she started...
I said, "How did you start?"

1449
01:12:28,043 --> 01:12:29,237
She said she was
a bored housewife.

1450
01:12:29,244 --> 01:12:30,154
- Yes.
- Really?

1451
01:12:30,346 --> 01:12:31,840
- You were a married woman.
- Yes, I was.

1452
01:12:31,847 --> 01:12:34,487
And you were sitting at home. Did
you watch a lot of porno at home?

1453
01:12:34,583 --> 01:12:35,423
No, I've only seen...

1454
01:12:35,451 --> 01:12:37,590
I only saw half a porno
my whole life.

1455
01:12:37,753 --> 01:12:39,255
I'd have to
say that Howard Stern

1456
01:12:39,421 --> 01:12:42,095
has been a very big part
of my career.

1457
01:12:42,291 --> 01:12:46,262
He helped me brand
Tabitha Stevens.

1458
01:12:47,529 --> 01:12:49,031
And it's a great opportunity.

1459
01:12:49,231 --> 01:12:52,440
And I have to laugh
because I always hear,

1460
01:12:52,634 --> 01:12:56,446
"Did you have to sleep with Howard to
be on that many times on his show?"

1461
01:12:56,638 --> 01:12:58,276
And no, never.

1462
01:12:58,474 --> 01:13:01,182
I've never, ever
had sex with Howard Stern.

1463
01:13:01,377 --> 01:13:04,517
I've never, ever, ever had sex
with Howard Stern.

1464
01:13:04,713 --> 01:13:07,751
Or anyone from his show,

1465
01:13:07,950 --> 01:13:12,092
unless it was
a Wack Pack member, okay?

1466
01:13:12,287 --> 01:13:13,288
There you have it.

1467
01:13:13,489 --> 01:13:16,402
The truth coming
from my mouth to your ears.

1468
01:13:25,501 --> 01:13:27,071
I like, when I'm going on a set,

1469
01:13:27,269 --> 01:13:30,741
I like to know
what I'm going to do.

1470
01:13:30,939 --> 01:13:32,714
I like to know this
on the porno set.

1471
01:13:32,908 --> 01:13:36,321
- Mm-hmm. - I like to know what
time I'm going to be finished

1472
01:13:36,512 --> 01:13:38,219
and I like to be
treated with respect.

1473
01:13:38,414 --> 01:13:39,552
That's all there is.

1474
01:13:39,748 --> 01:13:42,285
I mean, that's the one thing.
If you treat me with respect,

1475
01:13:42,484 --> 01:13:45,328
I'll treat you
with 100 times more respect.

1476
01:13:45,521 --> 01:13:48,229
That's all it is.
It's just that.

1477
01:13:49,258 --> 01:13:51,397
In 1993, I got married.

1478
01:13:51,593 --> 01:13:55,234
And I married a guy
who was a super-cool guy.

1479
01:13:55,431 --> 01:13:57,001
Did very well for himself.

1480
01:13:57,199 --> 01:13:59,941
I was a stripper
when I first met him,

1481
01:14:00,135 --> 01:14:01,910
and then I quit obviously.

1482
01:14:02,104 --> 01:14:03,310
And I became a housewife.

1483
01:14:03,505 --> 01:14:05,348
And I was very bored.

1484
01:14:05,541 --> 01:14:08,681
The first video that I shot
was called "Rolling Thunder."

1485
01:14:08,877 --> 01:14:10,515
It was by Vivid Entertainment.

1486
01:14:10,712 --> 01:14:12,316
Racquel Darrian
was on the box cover

1487
01:14:12,514 --> 01:14:14,516
and my scene
was with Bobby Vitale.

1488
01:14:14,716 --> 01:14:17,754
And it was supposed to be a girl,
but it ended up being a boy/girl.

1489
01:14:17,953 --> 01:14:19,523
They switched it
on my last minute.

1490
01:14:19,721 --> 01:14:22,327
So, of course I didn't tell
my husband at the time that.

1491
01:14:22,524 --> 01:14:25,471
But I remember-
this is the funniest thing...

1492
01:14:25,661 --> 01:14:28,141
being nervous about my dialog.

1493
01:14:28,330 --> 01:14:29,968
The sex I knew I could do,

1494
01:14:30,165 --> 01:14:31,542
'cause I knew I had a...

1495
01:14:31,733 --> 01:14:33,028
You know, I was
real good at that.

1496
01:14:33,035 --> 01:14:34,013
I kinda still am.

1497
01:14:34,203 --> 01:14:35,773
But anyway.

1498
01:14:35,971 --> 01:14:39,942
But my thing was, what if I
don't get my lines right?

1499
01:14:40,142 --> 01:14:41,143
And I told them that.

1500
01:14:41,343 --> 01:14:43,152
And they're like,
"You're gonna be fine."

1501
01:14:43,345 --> 01:14:45,052
After my scene was over,

1502
01:14:45,247 --> 01:14:47,625
well, I was on a desk.

1503
01:14:47,816 --> 01:14:49,557
I was supposed to be
playing a secretary.

1504
01:14:49,751 --> 01:14:51,162
- Imagine that.
- With Bobby Vitale.

1505
01:14:51,353 --> 01:14:52,297
And when I got up,

1506
01:14:52,488 --> 01:14:54,248
there were phone numbers
imprinted on my ass.

1507
01:14:55,424 --> 01:14:56,818
And I couldn't figure out
what it was.

1508
01:14:56,825 --> 01:14:58,105
Like, "Oh, my God,
who did this?"

1509
01:14:58,160 --> 01:14:59,754
But, yeah, so it was
kind of interesting.

1510
01:14:59,761 --> 01:15:01,361
But then I got divorced
right after that.

1511
01:15:01,430 --> 01:15:04,809
I had my mom get all
my stuff out of my house,

1512
01:15:05,000 --> 01:15:06,570
you know, got divorced,

1513
01:15:06,768 --> 01:15:08,839
and that was it.

1514
01:15:09,037 --> 01:15:10,539
Never looked back.

1515
01:15:10,739 --> 01:15:14,243
I just couldn't see myself being an
extension of somebody else's life.

1516
01:15:14,443 --> 01:15:16,184
I mean, he was successful
in what he did

1517
01:15:16,378 --> 01:15:17,584
and he was a great provider,

1518
01:15:17,779 --> 01:15:20,419
and again, I have nothing
against the guy whatsoever.

1519
01:15:20,616 --> 01:15:22,616
But here's the thing.
It's like that was his thing.

1520
01:15:22,784 --> 01:15:24,593
I needed to find my thing

1521
01:15:24,786 --> 01:15:26,993
and it ended up
porn was my thing.

1522
01:15:27,189 --> 01:15:29,226
I just call it
ass-fucking, myself.

1523
01:15:29,424 --> 01:15:30,994
When I got into the business,

1524
01:15:31,193 --> 01:15:33,867
I was told
one really important thing.

1525
01:15:34,062 --> 01:15:36,406
Pace out your career.

1526
01:15:36,598 --> 01:15:39,545
If you want any kind
of longevity,

1527
01:15:39,735 --> 01:15:41,772
don't do anal scenes right away.

1528
01:15:41,970 --> 01:15:43,415
Give it a couple of years.

1529
01:15:43,605 --> 01:15:45,778
Don't do a double
penetration rig ht away.

1530
01:15:45,974 --> 01:15:47,578
Wait for interracial.

1531
01:15:47,776 --> 01:15:48,846
That was a big thing.

1532
01:15:49,044 --> 01:15:50,421
Okay, well, I didn't know.

1533
01:15:50,612 --> 01:15:51,732
Here I come into a business.

1534
01:15:51,813 --> 01:15:53,493
I didn't know anybody
in the porn business.

1535
01:15:53,615 --> 01:15:55,117
So, I paced my career.

1536
01:15:55,317 --> 01:15:57,228
It took me what,
about a year and a half,

1537
01:15:57,419 --> 01:15:58,921
two years to do
my first anal scene?

1538
01:15:59,121 --> 01:16:01,533
Think I've done eight
anal scenes my entire career.

1539
01:16:01,723 --> 01:16:03,600
Maybe eight to ten?

1540
01:16:03,792 --> 01:16:05,237
Double penetration.

1541
01:16:05,427 --> 01:16:08,237
I did that...
three years later?

1542
01:16:08,430 --> 01:16:09,534
So, I took my time with it.

1543
01:16:09,731 --> 01:16:12,712
It took me 17 years before I did
my first interracial scene.

1544
01:16:12,901 --> 01:16:14,642
So, I took my time

1545
01:16:14,836 --> 01:16:16,543
so that I wasn't burnt out

1546
01:16:16,738 --> 01:16:18,479
and people weren't burnt out.

1547
01:16:20,275 --> 01:16:21,583
Are you following me again?

1548
01:16:24,813 --> 01:16:27,054
Told you to stop following me.

1549
01:16:27,249 --> 01:16:28,592
No, no, wait.

1550
01:16:29,618 --> 01:16:30,926
I think nowadays

1551
01:16:31,119 --> 01:16:34,259
that the day
of the contract is over.

1552
01:16:34,456 --> 01:16:35,958
And that was a big deal for us.

1553
01:16:36,158 --> 01:16:37,398
That was a totally big deal

1554
01:16:37,593 --> 01:16:40,597
because you use that contract
to get on box covers.

1555
01:16:40,796 --> 01:16:41,823
You needed those box covers

1556
01:16:41,830 --> 01:16:43,275
so you could go
on the road dancing.

1557
01:16:43,465 --> 01:16:45,467
You made a lot of money
feature dancing.

1558
01:16:45,667 --> 01:16:48,273
Now, I do know that nowadays
girls still go on the road.

1559
01:16:48,470 --> 01:16:50,848
What happened to being
in those bigger movies

1560
01:16:51,039 --> 01:16:52,999
where you could be
the only girl on the box cover?

1561
01:16:53,108 --> 01:16:56,578
Now everybody's on the box cover
with gaping assholes.

1562
01:16:56,778 --> 01:16:58,621
I don't think that's attractive.

1563
01:16:58,814 --> 01:17:02,159
Back then it was classier
than I think it is now.

1564
01:17:02,351 --> 01:17:06,163
And I think that girls
are doing things nowadays

1565
01:17:06,321 --> 01:17:08,121
that they probably
wouldn't really want to do,

1566
01:17:08,190 --> 01:17:11,171
like the double anals
or the double vag.

1567
01:17:11,326 --> 01:17:12,686
Because they want
to make the money

1568
01:17:12,861 --> 01:17:16,891
and because there's
so much competition.

1569
01:17:16,898 --> 01:17:18,377
But the an of it

1570
01:17:18,567 --> 01:17:20,513
is when you're suckin' it,
you gotta twist it.

1571
01:17:20,702 --> 01:17:22,113
You gotta Mist it at the top.

1572
01:17:22,304 --> 01:17:23,544
Remember that, Dave, for later.

1573
01:17:23,705 --> 01:17:26,117
Twist, jerk it,
and twist it and lick it

1574
01:17:26,308 --> 01:17:27,309
and go down and up.

1575
01:17:27,509 --> 01:17:28,629
But don't do it in my teeth.

1576
01:17:28,710 --> 01:17:30,690
I mean, they hurt.
These are really good teeth.

1577
01:17:30,879 --> 01:17:31,740
See? They're really good.

1578
01:17:31,747 --> 01:17:33,727
We're all in the sex business.

1579
01:17:33,915 --> 01:17:35,360
And I've heard this said before.

1580
01:17:35,550 --> 01:17:36,722
We're all hoes on this bus

1581
01:17:36,918 --> 01:17:38,397
when it com es to work.

1582
01:17:38,587 --> 01:17:42,626
I've heard that now girls are
getting into the porn business

1583
01:17:42,824 --> 01:17:44,804
so that they can become escorts.

1584
01:17:44,993 --> 01:17:46,336
That's what's happening now.

1585
01:17:46,528 --> 01:17:49,338
I'm not against it.
Not one bit.

1586
01:17:49,531 --> 01:17:51,374
So, that's why
you really don't see

1587
01:17:51,566 --> 01:17:54,547
the age of
the porn star anymore.

1588
01:17:54,703 --> 01:17:57,377
I think that
there are a very few.

1589
01:17:57,572 --> 01:18:00,212
You still have your Jessica
Drakes of the world.

1590
01:18:00,409 --> 01:18:03,185
But you look at Jessie today, and
I mean, who else after Jessie?

1591
01:18:03,378 --> 01:18:04,914
I don't really know many girls

1592
01:18:05,113 --> 01:18:07,024
that are now the porn star.

1593
01:18:07,215 --> 01:18:10,822
And now I think that's the way
they're doing it, is to...

1594
01:18:11,019 --> 01:18:12,259
And I'm not knocking the girls.

1595
01:18:12,454 --> 01:18:15,435
Hey, if that's how they want to
make their money, that's fine.

1596
01:18:15,624 --> 01:18:16,932
Again, be safe about it.

1597
01:18:17,125 --> 01:18:19,354
But I think they're coming in the
industry to make a little name,

1598
01:18:19,361 --> 01:18:24,435
and then they go out there and make
probably even more money being an escort.

1599
01:18:26,935 --> 01:18:30,678
So have you ever wondered
why I'm so at ease

1600
01:18:30,872 --> 01:18:32,749
with the adult business

1601
01:18:32,941 --> 01:18:35,854
and when you were
doing movies and whatnot?

1602
01:18:36,044 --> 01:18:38,524
I kind of have an idea,
but what is it?

1603
01:18:38,714 --> 01:18:41,194
Well, it's that...

1604
01:18:41,383 --> 01:18:43,954
I understand
the entertainment value.

1605
01:18:44,152 --> 01:18:47,599
I understand that there's rarely
true passion involved.

1606
01:18:47,789 --> 01:18:49,029
And that at the end of the day,

1607
01:18:49,091 --> 01:18:52,197
it's a job as most jobs are.

1608
01:18:57,132 --> 01:18:58,577
Rolling.

1609
01:18:59,167 --> 01:19:00,805
Cut.

1610
01:19:01,002 --> 01:19:02,997
All right. I'm gonna get a wide
shot and I'll come back there.

1611
01:19:03,004 --> 01:19:04,278
And rolling.

1612
01:19:04,473 --> 01:19:06,612
And the reality of
it is, is it's hard work.

1613
01:19:06,808 --> 01:19:07,718
It's entertainment.

1614
01:19:07,909 --> 01:19:10,788
I knew that you, like anybody
in the adult business

1615
01:19:10,979 --> 01:19:14,324
has to produce work.

1616
01:19:14,516 --> 01:19:16,723
When I decided to hang it up,

1617
01:19:16,918 --> 01:19:19,831
with my career, I'd have to say

1618
01:19:20,021 --> 01:19:23,093
it was pretty much
a joint decision about that.

1619
01:19:23,291 --> 01:19:24,929
- Wouldn't we say?
- Absolutely.

1620
01:19:25,127 --> 01:19:26,128
Yeah, it was.

1621
01:19:26,328 --> 01:19:28,330
Again, I respect Gary so much.

1622
01:19:28,530 --> 01:19:30,771
And if Gary ever had a hard time

1623
01:19:30,966 --> 01:19:33,495
and said, you know, "I really don't
want you to do this anymore."

1624
01:19:33,502 --> 01:19:34,742
Could you please stop?"
I would.

1625
01:19:34,936 --> 01:19:37,746
I just love
and respect my husband.

1626
01:19:37,939 --> 01:19:38,979
And he's the same with me.

1627
01:19:39,040 --> 01:19:40,840
And I just figured, you know,
and it was time.

1628
01:19:41,009 --> 01:19:44,320
It was just time to move on
to bigger and better things.

1629
01:20:07,969 --> 01:20:11,849
Tabitha and I spend
day after day after day

1630
01:20:12,040 --> 01:20:14,543
backpacks on our backs,
trekking into the wilderness,

1631
01:20:14,743 --> 01:20:17,189
and we're shooting amazing,
stunning, beautiful

1632
01:20:17,379 --> 01:20:19,484
fine an photography landscapes.

1633
01:20:19,681 --> 01:20:23,060
And we're producing and Tabitha's
core, absolutely pivotal.

1634
01:20:23,218 --> 01:20:24,561
A lot of the ideas are hers,

1635
01:20:24,753 --> 01:20:27,063
the concepts are hers,
the design.

1636
01:20:27,255 --> 01:20:29,531
And we're producing
and creating these works

1637
01:20:29,724 --> 01:20:32,637
for a fine an
photography gallery,

1638
01:20:32,828 --> 01:20:35,001
- which is named...
- Savage Territory,

1639
01:20:35,197 --> 01:20:36,972
a Gary Orona gallery.

1640
01:20:37,866 --> 01:20:38,810
How do I say it again?

1641
01:20:39,000 --> 01:20:41,537
- "This is where I am."
- "This is where I am." Okay.

1642
01:20:41,736 --> 01:20:42,976
This is where I am now.

1643
01:20:43,171 --> 01:20:45,651
My husband and I own
a fine an photography gallery

1644
01:20:45,841 --> 01:20:49,812
here, in Green River, Utah,
called Savage Territory.

1645
01:20:53,682 --> 01:20:56,042
- Yeah. - Okay. But I'm just
letting you know I'm more fine.

1646
01:20:56,218 --> 01:20:57,822
I'm really fine.

1647
01:21:09,097 --> 01:21:11,668
I actually do think
about a life after porn.

1648
01:21:11,867 --> 01:21:13,676
I want to either...

1649
01:21:13,869 --> 01:21:15,109
I want to go to college really.

1650
01:21:15,203 --> 01:21:16,375
I was raised Jehovah Witness,

1651
01:21:16,571 --> 01:21:18,949
so I was in a really small
school that my family opened.

1652
01:21:19,140 --> 01:21:20,860
So, I've not really been
familiar with like,

1653
01:21:20,976 --> 01:21:22,785
public schools
or public schooling.

1654
01:21:22,978 --> 01:21:26,016
So, college to me
is gonna be a huge experience.

1655
01:21:26,214 --> 01:21:29,627
So, what I'd like to do is go
and kind of see the colleges

1656
01:21:29,818 --> 01:21:31,855
and see the different like paths
that I can take

1657
01:21:32,053 --> 01:21:34,148
'cause I don't even know really
what I want to do after porn.

1658
01:21:34,155 --> 01:21:35,950
But I don't want to do porn
for the rest of my life.

1659
01:21:35,957 --> 01:21:38,198
I'll probably be in
maybe another year or two

1660
01:21:38,393 --> 01:21:40,202
is the longest I would say,

1661
01:21:40,395 --> 01:21:44,366
and then go to a school and figure
out kind of what I want to do.

1662
01:21:44,566 --> 01:21:45,846
And maybe I'll work
with children

1663
01:21:46,001 --> 01:21:47,912
or maybe something
like massage therapy

1664
01:21:48,103 --> 01:21:49,605
or physical therapy maybe.

1665
01:21:53,074 --> 01:21:57,887
I do have a plan for getting out
of porn and performing.

1666
01:21:58,079 --> 01:21:59,057
I'm actually a partner

1667
01:21:59,247 --> 01:22:01,249
in the agency
that I'm with right now.

1668
01:22:01,449 --> 01:22:03,952
And we have a production side.
It's called Vuluce.

1669
01:22:04,152 --> 01:22:06,598
And we'll be shooting
models for that

1670
01:22:06,788 --> 01:22:10,634
and doing fan sites
and all that good, fun stuff.

1671
01:22:10,825 --> 01:22:12,930
I want to have a family one day.

1672
01:22:13,128 --> 01:22:15,506
So, definitely
on the right track

1673
01:22:15,697 --> 01:22:18,507
to succeeding for that.

1674
01:22:18,700 --> 01:22:20,270
So, I'm excited.

1675
01:22:23,038 --> 01:22:25,416
I got this fantasy job

1676
01:22:25,607 --> 01:22:29,180
that, you know, I gotta step back
and kind of analyze this here

1677
01:22:29,377 --> 01:22:30,822
and say, "Wait a minute."

1678
01:22:31,012 --> 01:22:33,993
"You know, I can
choose any woman,

1679
01:22:34,182 --> 01:22:37,823
you know, or I could ask
if I can have a scene with her."

1680
01:22:38,019 --> 01:22:43,025
And to know that I'm gonna
be with most amazing women

1681
01:22:43,224 --> 01:22:46,933
is just kind of...
fantasy come true.

1682
01:22:47,128 --> 01:22:49,324
A lot of people have hang up
about me just doing girl/girls,

1683
01:22:49,331 --> 01:22:51,470
and oh, it's this,
it's fake and it's shit.

1684
01:22:51,666 --> 01:22:53,106
They can kiss my ass
'cause it's not.

1685
01:22:53,201 --> 01:22:55,129
I don't like, you know,
when a lot of the girl/girls

1686
01:22:55,136 --> 01:22:57,776
have the, you know,
touch tongues or this.

1687
01:22:57,973 --> 01:23:03,787
I want a connection where
we can hold tight and sweat

1688
01:23:03,979 --> 01:23:07,654
and... two become as one.

1689
01:23:07,849 --> 01:23:11,126
Life is gonna zoom on by

1690
01:23:11,319 --> 01:23:14,232
and... you know,

1691
01:23:14,422 --> 01:23:19,064
I want to grab and feel things
as much as I can now.

1692
01:23:19,260 --> 01:23:21,740
And I feel here just recently,

1693
01:23:21,930 --> 01:23:23,568
I want to grab all this stuff.

1694
01:23:23,765 --> 01:23:25,142
And I'm almost in a panic.

1695
01:23:32,240 --> 01:23:35,915
It's been years
since I've been interviewed

1696
01:23:36,111 --> 01:23:38,352
or in front of a camera.

1697
01:23:38,546 --> 01:23:40,992
Ultimately, this whole industry

1698
01:23:41,182 --> 01:23:43,890
is a big, fucking
cop out on life.

1699
01:23:44,085 --> 01:23:46,087
You wake up,
you're 47 years old,

1700
01:23:46,287 --> 01:23:48,062
and you ain't got
a pot to piss in.

1701
01:23:48,256 --> 01:23:50,702
Great. 25 years.
Now what are you gonna do?

1702
01:23:50,892 --> 01:23:54,032
Okay, I... It's...

1703
01:23:54,229 --> 01:23:55,173
Now what?

1704
01:24:23,091 --> 01:24:25,731
I remember being
in my childhood house

1705
01:24:25,927 --> 01:24:29,374
and I'm thumbing through
a local PennySaver,

1706
01:24:29,564 --> 01:24:33,444
and I saw an ad that said

1707
01:24:33,635 --> 01:24:36,809
"Wanted: figure models."

1708
01:24:37,005 --> 01:24:39,315
It was a test shoot
for Penthouse.

1709
01:24:39,507 --> 01:24:43,887
You know, I'm wearing
my grandmother's silk robe,

1710
01:24:44,079 --> 01:24:47,253
and I put on
some Lee press-on fingernails,

1711
01:24:47,449 --> 01:24:52,421
and we did some makeup
and went to Malibu Beach.

1712
01:24:52,620 --> 01:24:54,622
Test shot and lo and behold,

1713
01:24:54,823 --> 01:24:59,135
it was the centerfold
for December '87.

1714
01:25:00,595 --> 01:25:02,438
I was pampered.

1715
01:25:02,630 --> 01:25:05,839
I was loved.
I was wanted.

1716
01:25:06,034 --> 01:25:09,140
From there is where
I met Andrew Blake.

1717
01:25:09,337 --> 01:25:12,477
And he asked me if I'd be
interested in triple-X.

1718
01:25:12,674 --> 01:25:14,085
At the time I was married

1719
01:25:14,275 --> 01:25:16,778
and I said, "Yeah, I could
venture into triple-X"

1720
01:25:16,978 --> 01:25:18,457
as long as it's women only."

1721
01:25:18,646 --> 01:25:21,820
You know, out of courtesy
for my husband at the time.

1722
01:25:22,016 --> 01:25:26,795
And lo and behold,
"Hidden Obsessions."

1723
01:25:26,988 --> 01:25:29,264
Julia Ann and myself were

1724
01:25:29,457 --> 01:25:33,200
at that same time dancing
as Blondage.

1725
01:25:33,394 --> 01:25:36,375
We were on the road and,
you know, I told her

1726
01:25:36,564 --> 01:25:39,010
about what has just happened

1727
01:25:39,200 --> 01:25:42,147
with, you know, being asked
to do "Hidden Obsessions."

1728
01:25:42,337 --> 01:25:44,613
And she came aboard
and then she and I did

1729
01:25:44,806 --> 01:25:48,117
the ice, the infamous
ice dildo scene,

1730
01:25:48,309 --> 01:25:50,186
and that won awards, and...

1731
01:25:52,413 --> 01:25:54,017
we were rockstars.

1732
01:25:59,687 --> 01:26:01,667
♪ Come on over

1733
01:26:01,856 --> 01:26:04,234
♪ oh, honey, ooh, ooh

1734
01:26:04,425 --> 01:26:06,632
♪ Said, "Come on over"

1735
01:26:06,828 --> 01:26:09,707
The bucks were flying in.

1736
01:26:09,898 --> 01:26:13,175
I was just buying cars
for my mom,

1737
01:26:13,368 --> 01:26:15,848
for my sister,
for this person, that person,

1738
01:26:16,037 --> 01:26:17,983
and big houses,
and a lot of stuff.

1739
01:26:18,173 --> 01:26:19,433
I didn't know
what to do with it all.

1740
01:26:19,440 --> 01:26:21,477
It happened so fast.

1741
01:26:21,676 --> 01:26:23,349
I wasn't prepared for it,

1742
01:26:23,545 --> 01:26:25,855
which led me into taxes.

1743
01:26:26,047 --> 01:26:28,049
I... And...

1744
01:26:30,451 --> 01:26:32,863
Porn star Janine Lindemulder
is facing federal criminal rap

1745
01:26:33,054 --> 01:26:35,534
for failing to pay
about $80,000 in income tax.

1746
01:26:35,723 --> 01:26:39,000
Lindemulder was named last
month in a misdemeanor accusing her

1747
01:26:39,194 --> 01:26:41,105
of stiffing the IRS
for taxes due

1748
01:26:41,296 --> 01:26:45,438
on more than $350,000
of income in 2004.

1749
01:26:45,633 --> 01:26:49,274
Went to prison, misdemeanor,

1750
01:26:49,470 --> 01:26:50,278
failure to...

1751
01:26:50,471 --> 01:26:53,350
or willful failure
to pay back taxes.

1752
01:26:53,541 --> 01:26:56,454
That was kind of...
that was the beginning

1753
01:26:56,644 --> 01:26:59,557
of...

1754
01:26:59,747 --> 01:27:02,193
an incredible...

1755
01:27:02,383 --> 01:27:05,262
life-altering nightmare.

1756
01:27:06,654 --> 01:27:10,192
Janine Lindemulder is now
locked in a bitter custody dispute

1757
01:27:10,391 --> 01:27:13,099
with Sandra Bullock
and her husband Jesse James.

1758
01:27:13,294 --> 01:27:15,296
<i>Janine Lindemulder
says she's a good mother</i>

1759
01:27:15,496 --> 01:27:17,100
and her daughter is her world.

1760
01:27:17,298 --> 01:27:19,778
But Bullock and her husband
Jesse James have accused her

1761
01:27:19,968 --> 01:27:22,107
of everything from drug use
to child neglect

1762
01:27:22,303 --> 01:27:23,805
and are seeking sole custody.

1763
01:27:24,005 --> 01:27:25,313
Now that Lindemulder
has finished

1764
01:27:25,506 --> 01:27:27,816
a six-month prison term
for tax evasion,

1765
01:27:28,009 --> 01:27:29,283
she wants her child back,

1766
01:27:29,477 --> 01:27:32,390
setting the power couple up
for a big fight.

1767
01:27:32,580 --> 01:27:36,494
When the whole Sunny
custody thing is happening...

1768
01:27:38,453 --> 01:27:42,060
my ex had his lawyer,
high-priced lawyer.

1769
01:27:42,257 --> 01:27:44,737
I'm there, no lawyer...

1770
01:27:44,926 --> 01:27:48,339
totally confused
about the situation.

1771
01:27:48,529 --> 01:27:49,234
I'm tatted.

1772
01:27:49,430 --> 01:27:52,274
Judge is looking at
what my line of work is.

1773
01:27:52,467 --> 01:27:54,174
At one point,
she put her papers down,

1774
01:27:54,369 --> 01:27:56,349
looked me square
in the eyes and said,

1775
01:27:56,537 --> 01:28:00,610
you know, "What happened
to you in your childhood"

1776
01:28:00,808 --> 01:28:03,288
to make you
the way you are?"

1777
01:28:03,478 --> 01:28:05,424
And, you know, she sized me up.

1778
01:28:05,613 --> 01:28:08,287
She saw the tattoos, she sees
that you're a porn star,

1779
01:28:08,483 --> 01:28:11,293
and it was pretty much
a done deal.

1780
01:28:14,022 --> 01:28:16,662
She...

1781
01:28:16,858 --> 01:28:23,366
without even giving me
an opportunity to state my case,

1782
01:28:23,564 --> 01:28:25,669
I lost her.

1783
01:28:27,235 --> 01:28:29,806
Being in the industry,
being heavily tattooed

1784
01:28:30,004 --> 01:28:34,475
definitely changed
the course of my life.

1785
01:28:34,676 --> 01:28:35,780
You know.

1786
01:28:35,977 --> 01:28:39,447
The longer I was away
from my daughter,

1787
01:28:39,647 --> 01:28:43,220
the darker my world became.

1788
01:28:43,418 --> 01:28:47,560
I then found
myself heavily medicated.

1789
01:28:47,755 --> 01:28:52,226
You know, doctors prescribed
anti-depressants,

1790
01:28:52,427 --> 01:28:58,036
anti-anxiety, and then
pain pills came into play.

1791
01:28:58,232 --> 01:29:01,008
Vicodin, absolutely
drug of choice.

1792
01:29:01,202 --> 01:29:03,307
Poppin' those things like candy.

1793
01:29:03,504 --> 01:29:07,475
And just anything to alleviate

1794
01:29:07,675 --> 01:29:12,317
some of the anguish that I felt.

1795
01:29:14,749 --> 01:29:18,720
I found myself...

1796
01:29:18,920 --> 01:29:20,831
and this is tough to say,

1797
01:29:21,022 --> 01:29:22,160
but, homeless.

1798
01:29:22,357 --> 01:29:25,930
Homeless in my van with my cat,

1799
01:29:26,127 --> 01:29:29,438
just trying to make sense
of what's happened.

1800
01:29:29,630 --> 01:29:31,940
Having my daughter
pulled out of my life

1801
01:29:32,100 --> 01:29:33,408
in such a...

1802
01:29:36,871 --> 01:29:38,373
harsh manner.

1803
01:29:38,573 --> 01:29:40,052
You know, there was
no phone calls.

1804
01:29:40,241 --> 01:29:41,702
There was... I couldn't
tell her I love her.

1805
01:29:41,709 --> 01:29:44,121
You know, "I'm sorry,
I don't know what's happening."

1806
01:29:44,312 --> 01:29:45,352
I'm trying to get to you."

1807
01:29:45,546 --> 01:29:47,457
Everything was so confused

1808
01:29:47,648 --> 01:29:52,222
and I felt like
I was at a point of...

1809
01:29:54,622 --> 01:29:55,430
I want to check out.

1810
01:29:55,623 --> 01:29:58,399
I want to check out.
I can't deal.

1811
01:29:58,593 --> 01:30:00,368
I don't have the tools.

1812
01:30:00,561 --> 01:30:03,474
When Janine was going through
what she went through

1813
01:30:03,664 --> 01:30:05,974
with Jesse
and the loss of Sunny,

1814
01:30:06,167 --> 01:30:08,374
I thought I was gonna lose her.

1815
01:30:08,569 --> 01:30:11,379
I thought I was gonna lose her.

1816
01:30:13,508 --> 01:30:15,112
And because she suffered,

1817
01:30:15,309 --> 01:30:18,449
she suffered so, so deeply.

1818
01:30:18,646 --> 01:30:20,455
You know, I couldn't get
the knife out.

1819
01:30:20,648 --> 01:30:22,457
I couldn't make it right.

1820
01:30:22,650 --> 01:30:25,563
Everything I tried,
it was not enough.

1821
01:30:25,753 --> 01:30:27,426
To replace Sunny...

1822
01:30:29,690 --> 01:30:32,500
was all I wanted to do,
was get her back

1823
01:30:32,693 --> 01:30:34,331
and get her in her arms again,

1824
01:30:34,529 --> 01:30:37,100
and we just
didn't have the power.

1825
01:30:37,298 --> 01:30:39,904
We didn't have what,
you know, he had

1826
01:30:40,101 --> 01:30:43,344
as far as power and money,
and, you know.

1827
01:30:43,538 --> 01:30:45,484
He's an unworthy father and...

1828
01:30:47,275 --> 01:30:51,485
I finally have the nerve
to call a suicide hotline.

1829
01:30:51,679 --> 01:30:53,158
Call 'em up, I said,

1830
01:30:53,347 --> 01:30:55,122
"Man, I don't know
what's happening here.

1831
01:30:55,316 --> 01:30:56,989
I need to talk
to somebody."

1832
01:30:57,151 --> 01:31:01,190
And funny but sad,

1833
01:31:01,389 --> 01:31:04,131
the woman picks up the phone
and she says,

1834
01:31:04,325 --> 01:31:07,966
"We're really sorry,
but the doctor's not in."

1835
01:31:08,162 --> 01:31:10,768
And I'm like,
"Are you fucking kidding me?

1836
01:31:10,965 --> 01:31:13,172
Okay. All right,
I'll call back."

1837
01:31:13,367 --> 01:31:17,179
So, I'm kind of laughing,
crying at this point

1838
01:31:17,371 --> 01:31:20,181
and right then and there,
I said, "Okay."

1839
01:31:20,374 --> 01:31:23,218
Enough is enough.
I've got to pull this together."

1840
01:31:27,548 --> 01:31:28,549
I went to rehab.

1841
01:31:28,749 --> 01:31:31,730
I was in rehab for a month.

1842
01:31:31,919 --> 01:31:33,956
And everybody at this point

1843
01:31:34,155 --> 01:31:35,475
thought I was
just out of my mind.

1844
01:31:35,490 --> 01:31:37,197
<i>“Oh, she's a mam head.
Oh, she's on crack.“</i>

1845
01:31:37,391 --> 01:31:39,302
No, no, I'm lost.

1846
01:31:39,494 --> 01:31:45,410
I'm fucking heartbroken
beyond words.

1847
01:31:45,566 --> 01:31:47,477
At the same time,

1848
01:31:47,668 --> 01:31:51,172
I'm subjecting myself
to looking on the Internet

1849
01:31:51,372 --> 01:31:53,409
and looking at people
comparing me

1850
01:31:53,608 --> 01:31:56,487
to America's sweetheart,
Sandra Bullock, saying,

1851
01:31:56,677 --> 01:31:59,180
"Well, Janine deserves
to lose her kid.

1852
01:31:59,380 --> 01:32:02,657
She's this cracked out,
you know, porn whore."

1853
01:32:02,850 --> 01:32:08,027
And, you know, "Sandra Bullock is,
you know, the best thing for Sunny."

1854
01:32:08,222 --> 01:32:10,327
And it-that's just
bringing me down.

1855
01:32:10,525 --> 01:32:13,267
And I'm going,
"How am I gonna do this?"

1856
01:32:15,463 --> 01:32:18,672
Do I want my daughter
to do what I've done?

1857
01:32:18,866 --> 01:32:20,436
Fuck no.

1858
01:32:20,601 --> 01:32:22,205
No way.

1859
01:32:40,955 --> 01:32:43,629
I'm still-
I'm in limbo.

1860
01:32:43,824 --> 01:32:47,465
I don't know
what the future holds.

1861
01:32:51,265 --> 01:32:52,744
Do I go back to school?

1862
01:32:52,934 --> 01:32:54,641
Am I gonna be a waitress?

1863
01:32:54,835 --> 01:32:55,438
I don't know.

1864
01:32:55,603 --> 01:32:57,412
It's really kind of a...

1865
01:32:58,472 --> 01:33:01,316
an odd time
of my life right now.

1866
01:33:01,509 --> 01:33:03,386
I'm trying to figure that out

1867
01:33:03,578 --> 01:33:06,252
and, you know,
make my next move.

1868
01:33:08,416 --> 01:33:12,762
I've gotta have
the backbone to do it.

1869
01:33:12,954 --> 01:33:14,627
You know.

1870
01:33:14,822 --> 01:33:17,098
So far...

1871
01:33:17,291 --> 01:33:18,827
I don't.

1872
01:33:18,993 --> 01:33:21,473
I don't have it.

1873
01:33:21,662 --> 01:33:23,642
But it's getting there,
you know.

1874
01:33:23,831 --> 01:33:25,469
It's a work in progress.

1875
01:33:26,305 --> 01:33:32,829
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