1
00:00:07,700 --> 00:00:10,700
? I'm goin' down to South
Park, gonna have myself a time ?
2
00:00:10,733 --> 00:00:12,500
? Friendly faces everywhere ?
3
00:00:12,533 --> 00:00:14,633
? Humble folks without temptation ?
4
00:00:14,666 --> 00:00:17,866
? Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind ?
5
00:00:17,900 --> 00:00:19,533
? Ample parking day or night ?
6
00:00:19,566 --> 00:00:21,333
? People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor!" ?
7
00:00:21,366 --> 00:00:24,600
? Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind ?
8
00:00:24,633 --> 00:00:27,666
? Mrph rmhmhm rm! Mrph rmhmhm rm! ?
9
00:00:27,700 --> 00:00:30,986
? Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine ?
10
00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:36,400
HARRIS: Attention all units in the
vicinity of South Park Elementary.
11
00:00:36,433 --> 00:00:38,066
We have a code red.
12
00:00:38,100 --> 00:00:40,133
[Gun cocks] Principal calling
for help during school assembly.
13
00:00:40,166 --> 00:00:42,600
All officers needed at once.
14
00:00:42,633 --> 00:00:44,466
The school? [Engine turns over]
15
00:00:44,500 --> 00:00:45,900
Oh, geez Louise!
16
00:00:45,933 --> 00:00:49,733
[Sirens wailing, tires screeching]
17
00:00:49,766 --> 00:00:52,066
[Guns cocking]
18
00:00:53,300 --> 00:00:55,300
[Tires screech, glass shatters]
19
00:00:57,166 --> 00:00:58,500
We need to get to the gym.
20
00:00:58,533 --> 00:01:00,566
Half go this way, half
go around the side.
21
00:01:00,600 --> 00:01:02,166
Barbrady, you go around back.
22
00:01:07,866 --> 00:01:10,800
[Breathing heavily]
23
00:01:17,533 --> 00:01:18,866
On 3.
24
00:01:18,900 --> 00:01:20,800
1...2...
25
00:01:29,563 --> 00:01:31,666
There she is, officers, right there.
26
00:01:31,700 --> 00:01:34,300
I told you to stop chatting with
your friends, didn't I, Leslie?
27
00:01:35,633 --> 00:01:37,366
You see, officers,
apparently, Leslie thinks
28
00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:39,066
That talking to her
friends is more important
29
00:01:39,100 --> 00:01:41,209
Than learning about diversity
in third-world countries.
30
00:01:41,244 --> 00:01:42,240
It's that one.
31
00:01:42,275 --> 00:01:44,620
That's her, right there. You
remove her from my school.
32
00:01:44,655 --> 00:01:46,466
Aah! Nobody move! What's happening?!
33
00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:48,533
- Get her out of here!
- Oh, they've got me!
34
00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:49,500
[Gunshot] Aah!
35
00:01:49,533 --> 00:01:50,833
Aah!
36
00:01:56,245 --> 00:01:59,800
This town is outraged, Officer Barbrady.
37
00:02:00,166 --> 00:02:04,500
People are tired of the police not
being held accountable for their actions.
38
00:02:04,533 --> 00:02:08,100
Mayor, I didn't know if there
was a gunman or a bomb...
39
00:02:08,133 --> 00:02:11,955
You shot an unarmed
6-year-old Latino child.
40
00:02:11,990 --> 00:02:13,233
I'm sorry.
41
00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:15,159
You are fired.
42
00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:17,400
No, Mayor, please.
43
00:02:17,433 --> 00:02:18,800
This is all I know.
44
00:02:18,833 --> 00:02:21,700
I used to be the only policeman
in this town, remember?
45
00:02:22,183 --> 00:02:25,400
Bob, I-I used to chase away
the sixth graders for you.
46
00:02:25,679 --> 00:02:27,800
You're from another time, Barbrady,
47
00:02:27,833 --> 00:02:30,633
And the last thing that needs to go.
48
00:02:30,666 --> 00:02:32,308
Your gun and your badge.
49
00:02:37,056 --> 00:02:38,600
And your sunglasses.
50
00:02:38,633 --> 00:02:40,566
No. Please. Not my sunglasses.
51
00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:41,966
You're done, Barbrady.
52
00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:43,866
The town doesn't want you here.
53
00:02:48,300 --> 00:02:49,700
Where should I go?
54
00:02:49,733 --> 00:02:52,533
You should have thought of
that before you shot a Mexican.
55
00:02:52,566 --> 00:02:53,533
[Whispering] Latino American.
56
00:02:53,566 --> 00:02:55,033
Latino American. Shit.
57
00:02:55,066 --> 00:02:57,033
You should go away.
58
00:02:57,066 --> 00:03:01,166
You don't belong anywhere in a
town as progressive as this one.
59
00:03:09,966 --> 00:03:12,733
Hey, quiet down over
there. I'm trying to sleep.
60
00:03:12,766 --> 00:03:15,266
God damn it. You people
all get out of here!
61
00:03:15,300 --> 00:03:17,333
What makes you in charge?
62
00:03:17,366 --> 00:03:18,941
'Cause this is my [bleep] house!
63
00:03:18,976 --> 00:03:19,500
[Drum thuds]
64
00:03:19,533 --> 00:03:21,831
Hey, beat it, man, or
I'll make you my bitch!
65
00:03:21,866 --> 00:03:23,466
Aah!
66
00:03:24,188 --> 00:03:26,833
Yeah, we've got a bunch
of drug-addict vagrants
67
00:03:26,866 --> 00:03:29,466
Trespassing in our yard,
and we need assistance.
68
00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:31,136
Oh, is that so?
69
00:03:31,171 --> 00:03:32,866
Well, we'd like to come help you,
70
00:03:32,900 --> 00:03:34,633
But we don't want to get fired.
71
00:03:34,666 --> 00:03:36,100
What are you talking about?
72
00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:38,800
There's homeless people here,
and they're scaring my kids.
73
00:03:38,833 --> 00:03:40,600
You need to come do
something about this.
74
00:03:40,633 --> 00:03:42,033
I see.
75
00:03:42,066 --> 00:03:45,559
And are any of these homeless
people of a minority persuasion?
76
00:03:45,594 --> 00:03:46,833
Why does that matter?
77
00:03:46,866 --> 00:03:48,300
Oh, it matters.
78
00:03:48,333 --> 00:03:51,000
See, used to be we could beat
up minorities, and nobody cared.
79
00:03:51,033 --> 00:03:52,866
It's the reason a lot
of us joined the force.
80
00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:54,966
Hey, Mitch, you want to go down
and arrest some homeless people,
81
00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:57,266
But not be able to
beat up any minorities?
82
00:03:57,300 --> 00:03:58,166
No, thank you.
83
00:03:58,200 --> 00:03:59,733
Yeah, no, I think we're good.
84
00:03:59,766 --> 00:04:02,958
In fact, we're thinking of maybe turning
the whole department into a hula school.
85
00:04:02,993 --> 00:04:04,143
What do you think?
86
00:04:04,766 --> 00:04:06,666
God damn it!
87
00:04:06,700 --> 00:04:07,833
What are they doing?!
88
00:04:07,866 --> 00:04:08,833
They're not coming!
89
00:04:08,866 --> 00:04:10,233
But they have to!
90
00:04:10,266 --> 00:04:13,000
Karen brought in one of their
syringes, for Christ's sake!
91
00:04:13,033 --> 00:04:14,366
Well, it's just too bad.
92
00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:15,633
The cops won't come,
93
00:04:15,666 --> 00:04:18,400
So there's nobody to
scare the homeless away.
94
00:04:20,766 --> 00:04:23,966
[Lock disengages, door squeaks]
95
00:04:30,100 --> 00:04:32,600
Hey, sweetheart.
96
00:04:32,633 --> 00:04:36,866
I've, uh... I've been
let go from the force.
97
00:04:36,900 --> 00:04:38,566
I'm so sorry.
98
00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:40,900
[Dog whimpers]
99
00:04:40,933 --> 00:04:43,366
Don't worry, old girl.
100
00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:45,800
Might be a little tough
to afford your medication,
101
00:04:45,833 --> 00:04:48,066
but I'll find a way.
102
00:04:48,100 --> 00:04:50,333
You know me.
103
00:04:50,366 --> 00:04:52,900
I like to help.
104
00:04:52,933 --> 00:04:54,933
I like to be needed.
105
00:04:58,433 --> 00:05:00,266
You guys! Oh, my God, you guys!
106
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:02,966
You guys, they're gay!
They're totally gay.
107
00:05:03,907 --> 00:05:06,111
- Who?
- Kenny and Token.
108
00:05:06,146 --> 00:05:07,221
What?
109
00:05:07,256 --> 00:05:10,100
Kenny and Token, dude. They're
so gay. Butters told me.
110
00:05:10,133 --> 00:05:11,800
- You're lying.
- No, dude.
111
00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:13,966
In those old, abandoned
buildings around Kenny's house,
112
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:16,370
Kenny and Token turned it
into a big ninja clubhouse,
113
00:05:16,405 --> 00:05:19,133
And they dress up and play ninja
in it, trying to scare people away.
114
00:05:19,166 --> 00:05:20,733
How is that gay?
115
00:05:20,766 --> 00:05:22,200
It's the gayest thing ever, dude!
116
00:05:22,233 --> 00:05:23,266
Ninjas are [bleep] dumb!
117
00:05:23,300 --> 00:05:24,766
Dude, come on! We got to go see this!
118
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:26,333
Over this way!
119
00:05:26,366 --> 00:05:27,433
[Traditional Japanese music plays]
120
00:05:27,466 --> 00:05:29,066
Wah! Wah, wah!
121
00:05:29,100 --> 00:05:31,700
Hoo-ah, wah, wah!
122
00:05:31,733 --> 00:05:33,633
We will defend our ninja honor.
123
00:05:33,666 --> 00:05:35,066
Wo-chew,
wo-chew!
124
00:05:35,100 --> 00:05:36,533
Intruders! Defend the base!
125
00:05:36,566 --> 00:05:38,600
[Music continues]
126
00:05:38,633 --> 00:05:40,900
Hey, guys, did you come
to see our ninja fortress?
127
00:05:40,933 --> 00:05:43,533
[Gong crashes] Oh, my God.
They're so gay, you guys.
128
00:05:43,566 --> 00:05:44,966
You and Kenny built all this?
129
00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:47,900
Yeah, with Clyde and David, too.
130
00:05:47,933 --> 00:05:49,800
You guys should come and check it out.
131
00:05:49,833 --> 00:05:51,633
Uh, no. We're good, thanks.
132
00:05:51,666 --> 00:05:53,400
Oh, my God, dude. It's a sausage party.
133
00:05:53,433 --> 00:05:55,800
It's pretty cool, dude.
People are really scared of us.
134
00:05:55,833 --> 00:05:58,033
Yeah, I'm sure they are.
135
00:05:58,066 --> 00:05:59,666
Hey, excuse me, man.
Do you know where...
136
00:05:59,700 --> 00:06:02,333
[Middle Eastern music plays]
137
00:06:05,566 --> 00:06:08,300
Aah! Aahhhh!
138
00:06:08,333 --> 00:06:10,666
[All grunting]
139
00:06:10,700 --> 00:06:12,300
Oh, my God!
140
00:06:12,333 --> 00:06:14,333
Go, go, go! [Tires squeal]
141
00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:18,866
[Engine revs, tires squeal]
142
00:06:20,166 --> 00:06:21,633
That's pretty cool.
143
00:06:23,366 --> 00:06:25,966
Well, the way I heard it was
that the girl in the school
144
00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:28,800
Wasn't even doing anything,
just talking too loud,
145
00:06:28,833 --> 00:06:30,333
And someone ends up getting shot.
146
00:06:30,366 --> 00:06:32,333
Hey! What do you want?
147
00:06:32,915 --> 00:06:34,833
It's okay. I'm off-duty.
148
00:06:34,866 --> 00:06:36,610
Just came for a nice Pinot.
149
00:06:36,645 --> 00:06:38,200
Yeah? Well, go somewhere else, copper.
150
00:06:38,233 --> 00:06:40,766
ShiTpaTown is for people
who care about each other.
151
00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:43,933
We don't take kindly to folks
who impose their authority
152
00:06:43,966 --> 00:06:45,200
on the underprivileged.
153
00:06:45,233 --> 00:06:48,533
Now, look, not all cops are
racist, trigger-happy assholes.
154
00:06:48,566 --> 00:06:49,866
Really?
155
00:06:49,900 --> 00:06:53,000
I'll bet you don't even know
what "farm-to-table" means.
156
00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:58,666
Yeah! All right!
157
00:06:58,700 --> 00:07:00,066
Wow.
158
00:07:00,100 --> 00:07:01,900
We've only had a Whole
Foods for a month,
159
00:07:01,933 --> 00:07:04,100
And already, we don't need cops.
160
00:07:04,133 --> 00:07:05,766
So cool.
161
00:07:06,620 --> 00:07:09,666
It is a great honor to see
that you all want to be ninjas.
162
00:07:09,700 --> 00:07:12,100
Joining our club is very serious.
163
00:07:12,133 --> 00:07:14,682
You must promise to
uphold the warrior's code.
164
00:07:14,717 --> 00:07:15,900
Totally, dude. Ninjas are sweet.
165
00:07:15,933 --> 00:07:18,900
Together, we must strive to
make our fortress super badass
166
00:07:18,933 --> 00:07:20,900
And keep all intruders out.
167
00:07:20,933 --> 00:07:23,533
To that end, let us
proceed to our training.
168
00:07:25,333 --> 00:07:27,266
Dude, can I talk to you for a minute?
169
00:07:27,300 --> 00:07:30,733
Listen, I don't think we should
let Kyle be a ninja, okay?
170
00:07:30,766 --> 00:07:32,633
He said ninjas were gay.
171
00:07:32,666 --> 00:07:34,600
He's probably gonna try
to turn it around on me,
172
00:07:34,633 --> 00:07:36,333
But that's 'cause
Kyle knows I heard him.
173
00:07:36,366 --> 00:07:39,133
You're talking to Kyle right now.
174
00:07:39,166 --> 00:07:40,966
Yeah, cool.
175
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:42,366
It's me... Butters.
176
00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:43,833
You're the one who said ninjas were gay.
177
00:07:43,866 --> 00:07:45,266
Why do you want to make this a problem?
178
00:07:45,300 --> 00:07:47,334
I'm... I'm just Butters, man. I
have problems with lots of things.
179
00:07:47,470 --> 00:07:49,666
Hey, Eric, you want to
try sparring with me?!
180
00:07:49,700 --> 00:07:50,766
Yes I do, Butters.
181
00:07:50,800 --> 00:07:52,533
Ooh! Ow! [Coughs]
182
00:07:53,215 --> 00:07:55,333
Intruders!
183
00:07:55,366 --> 00:07:56,633
Yeah, it's right up here.
184
00:07:56,666 --> 00:07:58,600
We can shoot up in these
abandoned buildings.
185
00:07:58,633 --> 00:08:00,666
[All grunting]
186
00:08:04,166 --> 00:08:07,000
[Middle Eastern music plays]
187
00:08:07,033 --> 00:08:09,933
Aah! Aah! Aah. Aah!
188
00:08:10,443 --> 00:08:14,033
The town of South Park is
holding a large protest tonight
189
00:08:14,066 --> 00:08:16,066
Outside of their police department.
190
00:08:16,100 --> 00:08:19,066
The townspeople say the protest
is meant to begin a dialogue
191
00:08:19,100 --> 00:08:21,366
About the relationship
between law enforcement
192
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:24,000
And the citizens they
are supposed to protect.
193
00:08:24,033 --> 00:08:25,633
[Album scratching] ?
[Bleep] the police ?
194
00:08:25,666 --> 00:08:27,266
? Comin' straight
from the underground ?
195
00:08:27,300 --> 00:08:29,600
? A young nigga got it
bad 'cause I'm Brown ?
196
00:08:29,633 --> 00:08:31,900
? And not the other
color, so police think ?
197
00:08:31,933 --> 00:08:34,500
? They have the authority
to kill a minority ?
198
00:08:34,533 --> 00:08:36,133
? [Bleep] that shit,
'cause I ain't the one ?
199
00:08:36,166 --> 00:08:38,433
? For a punk mother[bleep]
with a badge and a gun ?
200
00:08:38,466 --> 00:08:41,366
? To be beaten on
and thrown in jail ?
201
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:44,733
? We can go toe-to-toe
in the middle of a cell ?
202
00:08:44,766 --> 00:08:46,433
?
203
00:08:46,466 --> 00:08:48,133
? [Bleep] the police ?
204
00:08:48,166 --> 00:08:49,300
[Bleep] [Bleep]
205
00:08:49,333 --> 00:08:50,500
? [Bleep] the police ?
206
00:08:50,533 --> 00:08:51,766
[Bleep] [Bleep]
207
00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:53,500
? Pulling out a silly
club, so you stand ?
208
00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:56,433
? With a fake-ass badge
and a gun in your hand ?
209
00:08:56,466 --> 00:08:58,933
? But take off the gun
so you can see what's up ?
210
00:08:58,966 --> 00:09:01,466
? And we'll go at it, punk,
and I'mma [bleep] you up ?
211
00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:03,466
? Ice Cube will swarm ?
212
00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:05,900
? On any mother[bleep]
in a blue uniform ?
213
00:09:05,933 --> 00:09:08,800
? Just 'cause I'm from the CPT ?
214
00:09:08,833 --> 00:09:10,933
? Punk police are
afraid of me, huh ?
215
00:09:10,966 --> 00:09:12,833
? A young nigga on the warpath ?
216
00:09:12,866 --> 00:09:16,133
? And when I'm finished,
it's gonna be a bloodbath ?
217
00:09:16,166 --> 00:09:18,433
? Of cops, dying in L.A. ?
218
00:09:18,466 --> 00:09:20,766
? Yo, Dre, I got something to say ?
219
00:09:20,800 --> 00:09:22,200
? [Bleep] the police ?
220
00:09:22,233 --> 00:09:25,333
?
221
00:09:25,366 --> 00:09:27,333
? [Bleep] the police ?
222
00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:34,666
Aahhhh!
223
00:09:38,546 --> 00:09:42,119
Are your children being lured
into terrorist organizations?
224
00:09:42,295 --> 00:09:45,680
A shocking report shows that some
kids in the town of South Park
225
00:09:45,713 --> 00:09:48,205
Are swearing loyalty
to a murderous regime.
226
00:09:48,246 --> 00:09:49,413
Yeah, we're pretty badass,
227
00:09:49,446 --> 00:09:51,180
And, um, this is, like, our fortress,
228
00:09:51,213 --> 00:09:52,813
And you can see it's pretty cool.
229
00:09:52,846 --> 00:09:55,613
MAN: And what about this way
of life is attractive to you?
230
00:09:55,646 --> 00:09:57,380
BUTTERS: Well, it's just
cool 'cause we're tough,
231
00:09:57,413 --> 00:09:59,062
And we fight and stuff. And we can...
232
00:09:59,097 --> 00:10:01,012
Yeah, yeah, yeah! And it's
like we can do whatever we want,
233
00:10:01,047 --> 00:10:02,945
And people are scared
of us. It's totally rad.
234
00:10:03,146 --> 00:10:04,846
Then why did you say it was gay before?
235
00:10:04,880 --> 00:10:07,980
Oh, my God! I never said it was gay!
236
00:10:08,013 --> 00:10:09,213
Wait, he said this was gay?
237
00:10:09,246 --> 00:10:10,626
That is a total lie!
238
00:10:10,661 --> 00:10:13,246
Why would I say something homophobic
about the way Tweek and Craig make love?
239
00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:15,383
He's a lying, backstabbing Jew!
240
00:10:15,418 --> 00:10:16,592
I'm Stan.
241
00:10:16,627 --> 00:10:19,180
No doubt the growing number of
kids swearing loyalty to ISIS
242
00:10:19,213 --> 00:10:21,913
Could be problematic
for the progressive town.
243
00:10:26,813 --> 00:10:28,813
Here you go, old girl.
244
00:10:28,846 --> 00:10:31,913
We'll just have to make do.
245
00:10:35,080 --> 00:10:36,980
Ew!
246
00:10:37,447 --> 00:10:38,713
Spare a dollar?
247
00:10:38,746 --> 00:10:40,213
No, I don't. I'm sorry. Thank you.
248
00:10:40,246 --> 00:10:42,380
God damn it. Ew.
249
00:10:43,813 --> 00:10:46,513
Mayor, I didn't bust my ass
to gentrify this part of town
250
00:10:46,546 --> 00:10:48,713
to have it overrun with homeless people.
251
00:10:48,746 --> 00:10:50,546
Why are they all suddenly coming here?
252
00:10:50,580 --> 00:10:52,713
Mayor, what are you
going to do about this?
253
00:10:52,746 --> 00:10:55,113
My wife and I can barely eat or shop.
254
00:10:55,146 --> 00:10:57,313
When a town like ours
has a homeless problem,
255
00:10:57,346 --> 00:10:59,480
It must look at the root
of what's causing it.
256
00:10:59,513 --> 00:11:01,080
- It's ISIS!
- What?
257
00:11:01,113 --> 00:11:04,280
There's these troubled kids who've
turned their backs on America.
258
00:11:04,313 --> 00:11:07,146
They've taken over SodoSoPa,
forced all the homeless out.
259
00:11:07,180 --> 00:11:09,713
Why would kids in our town
want to be a part of that?
260
00:11:09,746 --> 00:11:11,213
They're just bad kids,
261
00:11:11,246 --> 00:11:14,646
rotten on the inside,
probably with shitty parents.
262
00:11:17,046 --> 00:11:20,646
Son, I've always tried to be a fair dad.
263
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:24,680
I-I don't want to make
you angry, but why?
264
00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:28,313
Well dad, I just r-r-really
like being a part of something.
265
00:11:28,346 --> 00:11:30,619
I feel like it's character-building,
and it's lots of fun.
266
00:11:30,654 --> 00:11:32,213
Fun?
267
00:11:32,246 --> 00:11:34,646
But what do you... believe in?
268
00:11:34,680 --> 00:11:36,380
What do we believe in?
269
00:11:36,413 --> 00:11:38,746
We believe in something
greater than ourselves,
270
00:11:38,780 --> 00:11:40,413
and that by following
our strict warrior code,
271
00:11:40,446 --> 00:11:42,080
We believe that our
faiths and our traditions
272
00:11:42,113 --> 00:11:45,113
Are a way to a greater path...
the p-p-path of the warrior.
273
00:11:45,146 --> 00:11:46,846
And as long as we stay united in honor,
274
00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:48,113
We can defeat all our enemies.
275
00:11:48,146 --> 00:11:51,980
Waghgh waaaaghghhhg!
276
00:11:52,013 --> 00:11:53,380
Wow. The fellas were right.
277
00:11:53,413 --> 00:11:55,280
People are really freaked out by ninjas.
278
00:11:57,146 --> 00:11:59,446
Okay, we've just got
to be really apologetic
279
00:11:59,480 --> 00:12:01,246
And tell them we didn't mean it, okay?
280
00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:03,480
Geez. This is so embarrassing.
281
00:12:03,513 --> 00:12:05,713
What if they won't help
us with the homeless?
282
00:12:05,746 --> 00:12:09,546
I'm pretty sure the police will help out if
it's because ISIS is taking over the town.
283
00:12:09,580 --> 00:12:12,146
[Hawaiian music plays]
284
00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:20,213
Officers, there's kids in
town who have joined ISIS.
285
00:12:20,246 --> 00:12:21,386
We don't know who they are, but they...
286
00:12:21,421 --> 00:12:24,146
What? What's that, you say?
287
00:12:24,180 --> 00:12:26,280
The town is in danger, all right?
288
00:12:26,313 --> 00:12:28,846
We don't know what these
kids are capable of.
289
00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:30,580
Geez. I'm sorry.
290
00:12:30,613 --> 00:12:33,080
We've got to work on our Kaholo Koloa
291
00:12:33,113 --> 00:12:36,380
And get the lomilomi chicken
ready for the big Ho'olaule'a,
292
00:12:36,413 --> 00:12:37,680
Which leaves us, oh,
293
00:12:37,713 --> 00:12:39,880
Not enough time to deal with ISIS.
294
00:12:39,913 --> 00:12:42,013
All right, look, there's homeless people
295
00:12:42,046 --> 00:12:44,380
All over our gentrified
food-and-arts district.
296
00:12:44,413 --> 00:12:46,113
If you don't stop these
twisted kids, then...
297
00:12:46,146 --> 00:12:49,246
Hey, who was it that
said [bleep] the police?
298
00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:51,580
Was that Ice Cube? Tupac?
299
00:12:51,613 --> 00:12:53,913
Oh, right. That was you guys.
300
00:12:55,280 --> 00:12:57,380
Sorry, but I guess you'll
have to find somebody else
301
00:12:57,413 --> 00:13:00,446
to do all the difficult, dirty shit
you don't want to do yourselves.
302
00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:02,113
I got to be ready for the luau.
303
00:13:02,146 --> 00:13:05,380
I might even kiss a dude.
304
00:13:08,725 --> 00:13:11,874
So, then, after you told me, we
both went over to Kyle and Stan,
305
00:13:11,946 --> 00:13:13,366
where they were playing
basketball, remember?
306
00:13:13,564 --> 00:13:14,299
Yeah.
307
00:13:14,349 --> 00:13:16,246
And we said Kenny and
Token were playing ninja,
308
00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:17,780
And Kyle said that ninjas were gay.
309
00:13:17,813 --> 00:13:19,946
And I said, "Ninjas are
gay?" But it was a question.
310
00:13:19,980 --> 00:13:20,880
You remember?
311
00:13:20,913 --> 00:13:22,121
I thought you said it first.
312
00:13:22,156 --> 00:13:24,904
No, no, no, no. See, now, Kyle's
got everyone remembering it wrong
313
00:13:24,939 --> 00:13:26,761
because he doesn't want to
get kicked out of the group.
314
00:13:26,796 --> 00:13:28,213
That's what Jews do when
they're caught in a lie.
315
00:13:28,246 --> 00:13:29,929
You cannot trust a
Jewish ninja, Butters.
316
00:13:29,964 --> 00:13:31,234
TOKEN: You guys, you guys!
317
00:13:31,404 --> 00:13:32,281
STAN: What?
318
00:13:32,427 --> 00:13:35,374
- Actual ninjas want to talk to us.
- What?
319
00:13:35,409 --> 00:13:38,070
Kenny and I both just got the
same e-mail from people overseas.
320
00:13:38,105 --> 00:13:39,657
Whoa, dude!
321
00:13:39,692 --> 00:13:41,151
How'd they find out who we were?
322
00:13:41,186 --> 00:13:42,774
They're [bleep] ninjas, dude!
323
00:13:43,180 --> 00:13:45,280
[Static hissing]
324
00:13:45,313 --> 00:13:49,246
So, you are the brave children
who have committed to our cause.
325
00:13:49,280 --> 00:13:50,880
We have heard of what you are doing,
326
00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:52,646
And we are very impressed.
327
00:13:52,680 --> 00:13:54,280
Cool. Thanks, dude.
328
00:13:54,313 --> 00:13:56,380
What you are doing is very important,
329
00:13:56,413 --> 00:13:59,046
And we would like to
help you however we can.
330
00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:01,480
We are going to be
wiring you some money.
331
00:14:01,513 --> 00:14:03,913
Whoa! Cool!
332
00:14:03,946 --> 00:14:06,302
This is the greatest
thing ever, you guys!
333
00:14:06,337 --> 00:14:09,368
Uh, excuse me, could I just set
the record straight on something?
334
00:14:09,767 --> 00:14:11,011
Of course.
335
00:14:11,312 --> 00:14:13,246
Should Jews be trusted?
336
00:14:15,613 --> 00:14:17,246
I mean, if one of us is a Jew,
337
00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:19,546
Do you see that as
being at all problematic?
338
00:14:20,802 --> 00:14:22,142
Extremely.
339
00:14:22,177 --> 00:14:23,228
Yes!
340
00:14:23,402 --> 00:14:24,380
Yes!
341
00:14:24,413 --> 00:14:26,813
["U Can't Touch This" by MC
Hammer plays] Oh, oh, oh, oh!
342
00:14:26,846 --> 00:14:28,246
What did I tell you guys? Thank you!
343
00:14:36,971 --> 00:14:38,646
RANDY: Hey, Barbrady.
344
00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:40,046
Officer Barbrady?
345
00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:41,813
[Dog whimpers, pants]
346
00:14:41,846 --> 00:14:43,046
Wha... who?
347
00:14:44,128 --> 00:14:46,046
Hey, buddy.
348
00:14:46,392 --> 00:14:47,608
What do you want?
349
00:14:47,643 --> 00:14:50,464
How would you like to
be a policeman again?
350
00:14:50,499 --> 00:14:52,346
I'm no good as a policeman.
351
00:14:52,380 --> 00:14:54,780
I'm a bumbling, old fool.
352
00:14:54,813 --> 00:14:57,380
That is not true. Who said that?!
353
00:14:57,413 --> 00:15:01,413
Look, Barbrady, the fact
is, the town needs you.
354
00:15:02,775 --> 00:15:05,597
They need me? To do what?
355
00:15:06,123 --> 00:15:08,173
We need you to shoot some kids.
356
00:15:10,149 --> 00:15:11,839
No! Shoot kids?!
357
00:15:11,874 --> 00:15:13,969
I don't want to shoot kids!
358
00:15:14,974 --> 00:15:17,946
These are really bad kids... terrorists.
359
00:15:18,230 --> 00:15:20,222
This is totally different from before.
360
00:15:20,257 --> 00:15:21,191
Oh!
361
00:15:21,283 --> 00:15:23,303
Are any of them minorities?
362
00:15:24,682 --> 00:15:26,150
A couple of them we think, yeah.
363
00:15:26,185 --> 00:15:27,480
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
364
00:15:27,897 --> 00:15:30,111
Look, look, look! Barbrady! Barbrady!
365
00:15:30,887 --> 00:15:34,914
We were wrong about you.
I was wrong about you.
366
00:15:35,070 --> 00:15:39,716
You protected this town back
before anybody else ever did.
367
00:15:39,880 --> 00:15:42,830
You used to do it all on your own.
368
00:15:43,170 --> 00:15:45,732
We need you to do that again.
369
00:15:55,312 --> 00:15:58,021
You're the only cop this
town needs, Barbrady.
370
00:15:58,421 --> 00:15:59,928
Go shoot those kids.
371
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:05,213
?
372
00:16:05,329 --> 00:16:07,646
CARTMAN: Guys, I know
this is hard for all of us,
373
00:16:07,680 --> 00:16:10,363
But to truly be ninjas,
we must face hard facts.
374
00:16:10,580 --> 00:16:13,849
Last night, I spoke in private
with our ninja leader overseas.
375
00:16:13,888 --> 00:16:16,469
We talked a long time about
Jews and the Hebrew faith.
376
00:16:16,646 --> 00:16:18,646
He told me a lot I didn't know,
377
00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:21,546
And I was able to tell him
some things he did not know.
378
00:16:21,580 --> 00:16:23,213
But after talking with that guy,
379
00:16:23,246 --> 00:16:27,313
It is abundantly clear to me
that Jews cannot be ninjas.
380
00:16:27,346 --> 00:16:29,413
I went to Kyle's house
to talk to him about it,
381
00:16:29,446 --> 00:16:30,713
And I found this.
382
00:16:33,313 --> 00:16:35,146
It was then that Kyle confessed to me
383
00:16:35,180 --> 00:16:37,813
About how he had brainwashed
Butters and Stan into thinking
384
00:16:37,846 --> 00:16:41,346
I had used a homophobic slur
to refer to our organization.
385
00:16:41,380 --> 00:16:42,980
And he almost got away with it.
386
00:16:43,013 --> 00:16:44,480
That's when Kyle tried to kill me.
387
00:16:44,513 --> 00:16:47,046
Luckily, I was the faster ninja.
388
00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:49,646
Kyle knew I would never call ninjas gay.
389
00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:51,013
When I take the gag off,
390
00:16:51,046 --> 00:16:52,713
He's going to try and tell
you that I'm lying now.
391
00:16:52,746 --> 00:16:55,313
Do not believe him. Kyle is a liar.
392
00:16:55,346 --> 00:16:57,313
KYLE: I'm right here.
393
00:17:01,746 --> 00:17:03,446
Who... Who's this?
394
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:05,646
STAN: That's Clyde.
395
00:17:06,220 --> 00:17:07,980
And I am Token.
396
00:17:08,013 --> 00:17:09,784
Why do I do these things, you ask?
397
00:17:10,113 --> 00:17:11,380
Black rage.
398
00:17:11,413 --> 00:17:12,846
[Insects chirping]
399
00:17:12,880 --> 00:17:15,580
[Middle Eastern music playing]
400
00:17:19,513 --> 00:17:22,380
[Gasps] Oh, Jesus.
401
00:17:22,413 --> 00:17:23,946
ISIS. Oh, God.
402
00:17:27,113 --> 00:17:29,480
This chicken tastes like
shit. What'd you do to it?
403
00:17:29,513 --> 00:17:32,380
Okay... Okay, Dad, it's
not organic chicken.
404
00:17:32,413 --> 00:17:34,013
I'm not comfortable
shopping at Whole Foods
405
00:17:34,046 --> 00:17:35,746
With all the homeless people there.
406
00:17:35,780 --> 00:17:38,246
But don't worry, that's
all about to change.
407
00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:42,280
Soon we'll all have
ShiTpaTown to enjoy again.
408
00:17:43,213 --> 00:17:44,280
Where's Stan?
409
00:17:44,313 --> 00:17:46,613
He's playing ninjas
over at Kenny's house.
410
00:17:47,101 --> 00:17:48,980
Ninjas? That's gay.
411
00:17:51,013 --> 00:17:53,192
He's playing ninjas at Kenny's house?
412
00:17:53,342 --> 00:17:55,462
- Yeah.
- You mean SodoSoPa?
413
00:17:57,508 --> 00:17:58,980
Wait a minute...
414
00:17:59,013 --> 00:18:02,513
[Japanese music plays] Ninjas...
415
00:18:02,546 --> 00:18:06,246
[Middle Eastern music plays]
416
00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:08,480
[Japanese music plays]
417
00:18:08,513 --> 00:18:10,546
[Middle Eastern music plays]
418
00:18:10,580 --> 00:18:12,080
Scary...
419
00:18:12,113 --> 00:18:14,246
[Japanese music plays] Gay...
420
00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:15,613
[Middle Eastern music plays] Scary...
421
00:18:15,874 --> 00:18:16,613
[Both music switching] Gay.
422
00:18:16,646 --> 00:18:17,766
Scary. Gay.
423
00:18:17,918 --> 00:18:18,744
Scary. Gay.
424
00:18:18,780 --> 00:18:19,746
Randy what are you doing?
425
00:18:19,780 --> 00:18:20,654
Scary. Gay.
426
00:18:20,654 --> 00:18:21,095
Scary.
427
00:18:21,095 --> 00:18:21,528
Gay.
428
00:18:21,528 --> 00:18:21,969
Scary.
429
00:18:21,969 --> 00:18:22,746
Gay!
430
00:18:22,780 --> 00:18:24,346
Staaaan!!
431
00:18:24,380 --> 00:18:27,380
CARTMAN: Oh, I get the
misunderstanding now!
432
00:18:27,413 --> 00:18:30,546
No, see, I told Clyde that
Kyle said ninjas were gay,
433
00:18:30,580 --> 00:18:32,346
But Clyde thought I was Kyle,
434
00:18:32,380 --> 00:18:34,780
So then he was saying that
I said ninjas were gay.
435
00:18:34,813 --> 00:18:36,446
Meaning I as in Kyle.
436
00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:38,593
KYLE: Nobody ever gave
a shit, you fat turd.
437
00:18:38,628 --> 00:18:41,113
TOKEN: All those in favor of Cartman
being kicked out of our ninjas club?
438
00:18:41,146 --> 00:18:42,246
ALL: Hai!
439
00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:44,213
No! You can't kick me out!
440
00:18:44,246 --> 00:18:45,446
I have to be a ninja.
441
00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:47,380
They hate Jews. I was
made for this, you guys!
442
00:18:47,413 --> 00:18:48,346
Please!
443
00:18:48,380 --> 00:18:49,480
STAN: What should we do with him?
444
00:18:49,513 --> 00:18:50,380
Freeze!
445
00:18:50,413 --> 00:18:51,680
Oh, shit!
446
00:18:51,713 --> 00:18:54,646
Please! I don't want to shoot you!
447
00:18:54,680 --> 00:18:55,846
STAN: Cool. Don't.
448
00:18:55,880 --> 00:18:57,113
[Groaning]
449
00:18:57,146 --> 00:18:58,380
[Children flinch]
450
00:18:58,413 --> 00:19:01,113
I understand you're
feeling angry at this town.
451
00:19:01,146 --> 00:19:03,513
I'm getting pretty angry, too!
452
00:19:03,546 --> 00:19:06,046
But we can't give up on it.
453
00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:08,080
Please, boys...
454
00:19:08,113 --> 00:19:10,146
Don't make this end violently.
455
00:19:10,180 --> 00:19:11,713
They're just stupid ninjas!
456
00:19:13,380 --> 00:19:14,346
DAVID: Aah!!
457
00:19:14,380 --> 00:19:15,746
Aaaah!!
458
00:19:21,513 --> 00:19:24,180
What were you thinking?
459
00:19:24,213 --> 00:19:28,113
Boys innocently playing ninja,
and you pull your gun on them?
460
00:19:28,146 --> 00:19:30,946
David Rodriguez was lucky to live.
461
00:19:30,980 --> 00:19:33,546
Everybody told me they were terrorists!
462
00:19:33,580 --> 00:19:35,180
We thought they were!
463
00:19:35,213 --> 00:19:37,446
But if it turns out they
aren't, as a policeman,
464
00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:39,413
You have to figure that out!
465
00:19:39,446 --> 00:19:42,980
But... You said you needed
me to kill some kids!
466
00:19:43,013 --> 00:19:44,780
Oh, he's gonna lay this on us now.
467
00:19:44,813 --> 00:19:46,180
I said "kill some kids,"
468
00:19:46,213 --> 00:19:47,680
But I said it as a question, remember?
469
00:19:47,713 --> 00:19:49,980
I said, "Kill some kids?"
470
00:19:50,013 --> 00:19:53,613
I'm sorry, but we just can't
cover your ass on this one.
471
00:19:53,646 --> 00:19:56,680
There's going to be
an investigation and...
472
00:19:56,713 --> 00:19:58,613
You just don't have what it takes
473
00:19:58,646 --> 00:20:01,280
To be a policeman in today's times.
474
00:20:01,313 --> 00:20:04,246
Do you even know what
"farm to table" means?
475
00:20:09,313 --> 00:20:10,913
[Siren chirps]
476
00:20:10,946 --> 00:20:12,646
Let's go, people. You can't stay here.
477
00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:14,846
You are being relocated.
478
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:17,580
Hey, you can't kick us out of here, man.
479
00:20:17,613 --> 00:20:19,013
Oh, no? I'm a cop.
480
00:20:19,046 --> 00:20:20,913
Thank you, officers.
481
00:20:20,946 --> 00:20:23,046
We've got a deal, right?
482
00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:24,880
Yes.
483
00:20:24,913 --> 00:20:25,913
All right, you. Come on.
484
00:20:25,946 --> 00:20:28,380
Aah!
485
00:20:40,146 --> 00:20:42,580
Please! You can't take
me back to SodoSoPa!
486
00:20:42,613 --> 00:20:43,813
ISIS is there!
487
00:20:43,846 --> 00:20:45,513
No, those were just ninjas.
488
00:20:45,546 --> 00:20:46,880
Ninjas?
489
00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:49,246
Oh, that's so gay.
490
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:51,013
I told you guys.
491
00:20:51,046 --> 00:20:52,080
What did I tell you?
492
00:20:52,113 --> 00:20:53,446
I said ninjas are [bleep] gay,
493
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:54,413
But you didn't want to listen.
494
00:20:54,446 --> 00:20:55,746
Nooo.
495
00:20:57,480 --> 00:20:58,880
[Door opens]
496
00:21:02,446 --> 00:21:04,546
Officer Barbrady?
497
00:21:04,580 --> 00:21:05,546
Yes?
498
00:21:05,580 --> 00:21:07,413
We've been watching you.
499
00:21:07,446 --> 00:21:09,480
And what we see
500
00:21:09,513 --> 00:21:12,213
Is a man who truly wants
to protect his town.
501
00:21:13,546 --> 00:21:15,113
You do?
502
00:21:15,146 --> 00:21:17,513
You've been in this town
longer than almost anyone.
503
00:21:17,546 --> 00:21:20,780
Have you noticed... changes lately?
504
00:21:20,813 --> 00:21:22,746
Yeah, a lot of changes.
505
00:21:22,780 --> 00:21:25,013
They aren't a coincidence, officer.
506
00:21:25,046 --> 00:21:26,813
They are all part of a plan
507
00:21:26,846 --> 00:21:30,013
To take down your beloved
town and everyone in it.
508
00:21:30,046 --> 00:21:31,146
What?
509
00:21:31,180 --> 00:21:34,113
What do you know about
a little girl named...
510
00:21:34,146 --> 00:21:35,980
Leslie?
511
00:21:36,013 --> 00:21:38,180
[Dramatic music playing]
512
00:21:39,041 --> 00:21:43,481
Sync and corrected by rickSG
www.addic7ed.com