1
00:00:07,204 --> 00:00:09,039
There it is.

2
00:00:09,041 --> 00:00:10,541
Valencia.

3
00:00:10,543 --> 00:00:12,077
How do you think this should go down?

4
00:00:12,078 --> 00:00:15,078
Do you think I should save the kingdom
and then rescue Madalena?

5
00:00:15,080 --> 00:00:16,647
Or do you think
I should rescue, then save?

6
00:00:16,648 --> 00:00:19,750
'Cause I just want it to have
a dramatic build, you know?

7
00:00:19,751 --> 00:00:21,385
I mean, either way,

8
00:00:21,386 --> 00:00:23,120
we're all gonna live happily ever after.

9
00:00:23,121 --> 00:00:24,488
Yep.

10
00:00:24,489 --> 00:00:25,823
I'm sure that's exactly how
it's going to be.

11
00:00:25,824 --> 00:00:27,224
Especially the living part.

12
00:00:27,225 --> 00:00:28,659
For you.

13
00:00:28,660 --> 00:00:30,628
No reason why you wouldn't keep on living.

14
00:00:30,629 --> 00:00:32,697
Your life.

15
00:00:32,698 --> 00:00:34,198
You know you're talking, right?

16
00:00:40,939 --> 00:00:48,929
♪ I can't believe
we're al-l-mo-o-st the-e-e-re ♪

17
00:00:55,887 --> 00:01:01,625
♪ I can't believe he's al-l-mo-o-st here ♪

18
00:01:01,626 --> 00:01:03,294
You're little Valencian princess

19
00:01:03,295 --> 00:01:05,129
is leading Galavant right into my trap.

20
00:01:05,130 --> 00:01:07,665
He'll be here tonight as the sun has cast

21
00:01:07,666 --> 00:01:09,733
its last shadow upon the earth

22
00:01:09,734 --> 00:01:13,070
and the crescent moon is risen
above the Eastern Ridge.

23
00:01:13,071 --> 00:01:14,738
So, like 9:00?

24
00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:17,741
Yes, Gareth, he'll be here at 9:00.

25
00:01:17,742 --> 00:01:20,177
And I cannot wait!

26
00:01:20,178 --> 00:01:22,580
I will kill Galavant
in front of the queen,

27
00:01:22,581 --> 00:01:25,182
surprise her with the jewel,
and then finally bed

28
00:01:25,183 --> 00:01:27,751
the most delicate flower
in the seven realms.

29
00:01:27,752 --> 00:01:29,820
Attention, donkey turds!

30
00:01:29,821 --> 00:01:31,822
Where is that pox-ridden
sack of deformities

31
00:01:31,823 --> 00:01:33,157
known as my hand maiden?

32
00:01:33,158 --> 00:01:34,358
My hair is a disaster.

33
00:01:34,359 --> 00:01:36,427
Gwynne?

34
00:01:36,428 --> 00:01:37,528
My hair!

35
00:01:37,529 --> 00:01:39,063
Forgive me, My Queen.

36
00:01:40,865 --> 00:01:42,700
Was that too much to ask?

37
00:01:44,669 --> 00:01:47,037
Just think about it, hmm?

38
00:01:47,038 --> 00:01:50,474
We could, uh, we could do
a picnic, you know?

39
00:01:50,475 --> 00:01:51,875
Something super cazh.

40
00:01:51,876 --> 00:01:55,242
For the hundredth time, no.

41
00:01:55,244 --> 00:01:59,049
Your mouth is saying no, but I can see
your rotten teeth through that smile.

42
00:01:59,050 --> 00:02:00,289
Go on, you!

43
00:02:01,152 --> 00:02:03,053
She's going to be so surprised!

44
00:02:03,054 --> 00:02:05,289
No, she's not because you keep doing

45
00:02:05,290 --> 00:02:07,491
that stupid "evil king whisper" thing

46
00:02:07,492 --> 00:02:08,825
that everyone can hear.

47
00:02:08,826 --> 00:02:10,861
- How about this?
- Lower.

48
00:02:10,862 --> 00:02:12,462
- How about this?
- Oh, please.

49
00:02:12,463 --> 00:02:13,897
Oh, come on. That was good.

50
00:02:13,898 --> 00:02:15,799
For God's sakes, Gareth.
You're allowed to laugh.

51
00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:17,200
What are you two yabbering about?

52
00:02:17,201 --> 00:02:20,037
Nothing, darling. Nothing going on.

53
00:02:20,038 --> 00:02:22,806
That's right. There is nothing going on.

54
00:02:22,807 --> 00:02:25,175
I've been waiting for you
to find that jewel

55
00:02:25,176 --> 00:02:27,811
since we invaded this
wretched kingdom a year ago!

56
00:02:27,812 --> 00:02:31,148
Maddie, baby... chill.

57
00:02:31,149 --> 00:02:35,018
These things have a way
of... working themselves out.

58
00:02:35,019 --> 00:02:36,653
Why are you so calm?

59
00:02:36,654 --> 00:02:38,722
Normally when I yell at you,
you get tummy cramps

60
00:02:38,723 --> 00:02:40,857
and have to go poopy... your words.

61
00:02:40,858 --> 00:02:42,659
What can I say?

62
00:02:42,660 --> 00:02:46,029
I'm sleeping well, exercising,
laying off the wheat.

63
00:02:46,030 --> 00:02:48,064
Just in a really good place right now.

64
00:02:48,065 --> 00:02:50,200
You're inept.

65
00:02:50,201 --> 00:02:52,836
You're all inept!

66
00:02:52,837 --> 00:02:55,372
I can't even look at any of you anymore.

67
00:03:00,578 --> 00:03:02,379
♪ My husband's a wimp ♪

68
00:03:02,380 --> 00:03:05,148
♪ His henchmen are simply useless ♪

69
00:03:05,149 --> 00:03:07,550
♪ The servants and staff ♪

70
00:03:07,551 --> 00:03:10,754
♪ Are inbreeds and half-wits, too ♪

71
00:03:10,755 --> 00:03:14,357
♪ Oh, God, how I need someone here ♪

72
00:03:14,358 --> 00:03:16,926
♪ Willing to get things done here ♪

73
00:03:16,927 --> 00:03:20,463
♪ Someone who shares my point of view ♪

74
00:03:20,464 --> 00:03:23,466
♪ But who?! ♪

75
00:03:23,467 --> 00:03:25,435
♪ It's you ♪

76
00:03:25,436 --> 00:03:28,805
♪ No one but you ♪

77
00:03:28,806 --> 00:03:31,407
♪ No one's as smart and hard of heart ♪

78
00:03:31,408 --> 00:03:33,176
♪ And looks the part ♪

79
00:03:33,177 --> 00:03:34,444
♪ Like you ♪

80
00:03:34,446 --> 00:03:36,881
♪ Who'd pull off a coup d'etat like you ♪

81
00:03:36,881 --> 00:03:39,149
♪ While rockin' a push-up bra like you? ♪

82
00:03:39,150 --> 00:03:42,252
♪ Well, here's a clue, no one but you ♪

83
00:03:42,252 --> 00:03:45,721
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ No one but me ♪

84
00:03:45,723 --> 00:03:47,991
♪ Nobody wheels and double-deals ♪

85
00:03:47,992 --> 00:03:50,793
♪ In killer heels like me ♪

86
00:03:50,794 --> 00:03:53,263
♪ There's nobody who could rule like you ♪

87
00:03:53,264 --> 00:03:56,232
♪ While making her subjects
drool like you ♪

88
00:03:56,233 --> 00:03:57,834
♪ While tough to the core like you ♪

89
00:03:57,835 --> 00:04:01,804
♪ Let's face it,
who's more like you than you? ♪

90
00:04:01,805 --> 00:04:04,173
♪ No one but you ♪

91
00:04:04,174 --> 00:04:06,509
♪ Who has the brains to break her chains ♪

92
00:04:06,510 --> 00:04:08,144
♪ And seize the reins? ♪

93
00:04:08,145 --> 00:04:09,746
♪ Yeah, you ♪

94
00:04:09,747 --> 00:04:11,614
♪ It's been quite
the social climb for you ♪

95
00:04:11,615 --> 00:04:14,183
♪ And, honey, at last it's time for you ♪

96
00:04:14,184 --> 00:04:16,319
♪ So, answer the call for you ♪

97
00:04:16,320 --> 00:04:18,654
♪ And go take it all for you ♪

98
00:04:18,655 --> 00:04:20,823
♪ Who else is going to? ♪

99
00:04:20,824 --> 00:04:24,360
♪ Yes, who? ♪
♪ No one ♪

100
00:04:24,361 --> 00:04:26,362
♪ But yo-o-o-u ♪

101
00:04:26,363 --> 00:04:29,932
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪

102
00:04:29,933 --> 00:04:31,934
Get it, girl! You the queen!

103
00:04:31,935 --> 00:04:33,302
Go get 'em, girl!

104
00:04:33,303 --> 00:04:37,032
Galavant - 01x05
Completely Mad... Alena.

105
00:04:41,446 --> 00:04:44,537
Oh, sorry. I really had to pee.

106
00:04:44,539 --> 00:04:47,800
It takes so long to undo all
the laces on my riding pants.

107
00:04:47,802 --> 00:04:50,237
You know, someone should come up
with something

108
00:04:50,238 --> 00:04:52,439
around the crotch
that would just go "zip."

109
00:04:52,440 --> 00:04:54,641
You could do your business
and be done with it.

110
00:04:54,642 --> 00:04:57,410
That is the stupidest thing
I've ever heard.

111
00:04:57,411 --> 00:04:58,511
Tell him, Izzy.

112
00:04:58,512 --> 00:04:59,946
It's not a great idea, Sid.

113
00:04:59,947 --> 00:05:01,281
Are you sure?

114
00:05:01,282 --> 00:05:02,582
I really feel like I'm on to something.

115
00:05:02,583 --> 00:05:04,317
Can we just focus?

116
00:05:04,318 --> 00:05:05,885
We've got a castle to storm.

117
00:05:05,886 --> 00:05:08,788
The sun's almost perfect
for hero lighting.

118
00:05:08,789 --> 00:05:10,390
I should do some push-ups.

119
00:05:10,391 --> 00:05:13,893
But wouldn't it be better
to storm the castle later?

120
00:05:13,894 --> 00:05:15,695
Ooh, how about on a Wednesday?

121
00:05:15,696 --> 00:05:17,930
You never hear of anyone storming
a castle on a Wednesday.

122
00:05:17,932 --> 00:05:20,633
The thing is, is Wednesdays
are quite hard to rhyme with.

123
00:05:20,634 --> 00:05:22,202
And I'm pretty much 100% sure

124
00:05:22,203 --> 00:05:23,870
they're gonna write songs
about this one, so...

125
00:05:23,871 --> 00:05:25,805
Interlocking little teeth

126
00:05:25,806 --> 00:05:27,941
right in the front of your pants
that zip together.

127
00:05:27,942 --> 00:05:29,743
- Sid!
- You're embarrassing yourself.

128
00:05:29,744 --> 00:05:33,680
I mean, it just feels like
you're rushing it.

129
00:05:33,681 --> 00:05:36,950
If you took the time to think about it...

130
00:05:36,951 --> 00:05:40,085
You smell. Really bad.

131
00:05:40,087 --> 00:05:43,023
Princess, I'm a knight of the seven realms

132
00:05:43,024 --> 00:05:44,624
about to ride into a battle so epic...

133
00:05:44,625 --> 00:05:46,393
Oh, God, yeah.
Yeah, we should find a place.

134
00:05:46,394 --> 00:05:48,061
I need to wash up.

135
00:05:48,062 --> 00:05:49,429
Oh. Good.

136
00:05:49,430 --> 00:05:51,898
I thought I was having a bath.
This is a church.

137
00:05:51,899 --> 00:05:54,167
This isn't <i> just</i> a church.

138
00:05:54,168 --> 00:05:58,271
It's the most famed and revered
monastery in Valencia.

139
00:06:00,074 --> 00:06:02,375
♪ Bum ba-dum bum bum ♪

140
00:06:02,376 --> 00:06:05,378
♪ Welcome to our Abbey,
the best in the domain ♪

141
00:06:05,379 --> 00:06:07,947
♪ The order of our father
of perpetual refrain ♪

142
00:06:07,948 --> 00:06:09,415
♪ And we're the Monks ♪

143
00:06:09,416 --> 00:06:11,417
♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪

144
00:06:11,418 --> 00:06:13,052
- Back story, please.
- ♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪

145
00:06:13,053 --> 00:06:15,054
Valencian Monks all take a vow of singing.

146
00:06:15,055 --> 00:06:17,023
- Oh, bravo!  Kill me.
- ♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪

147
00:06:17,024 --> 00:06:18,424
♪ Come in if you are weary ♪

148
00:06:18,425 --> 00:06:19,659
♪ There's food if you would dine ♪

149
00:06:19,660 --> 00:06:22,695
♪ Plus 31 varieties of sacramental wine ♪

150
00:06:22,696 --> 00:06:23,796
♪ And we're the Monks ♪

151
00:06:24,328 --> 00:06:26,132
♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪

152
00:06:26,133 --> 00:06:28,768
♪ Hmmm ♪
♪ Bum ba-dum bum bum ♪

153
00:06:28,769 --> 00:06:29,903
♪ I'm the smart one ♪

154
00:06:29,904 --> 00:06:31,638
♪ Ahh, Hallelu ♪

155
00:06:31,639 --> 00:06:33,172
♪ I'm the cute one ♪

156
00:06:33,173 --> 00:06:34,641
♪ Boopsy-doo ♪

157
00:06:34,642 --> 00:06:35,942
♪ I'm the shy one ♪

158
00:06:35,943 --> 00:06:36,976
♪ Peekaboo ♪

159
00:06:36,977 --> 00:06:38,945
♪ And I'm the bad boy ♪

160
00:06:38,946 --> 00:06:41,614
♪ But not so bad 'cause I'm a monk ♪

161
00:06:41,615 --> 00:06:43,483
♪ Bless you, children ♪
♪ ooh ooh ooh-ooh ♪

162
00:06:43,484 --> 00:06:45,985
We seek shelter...

163
00:06:45,986 --> 00:06:49,055
Water for our horses,
and a bath for my friend.

164
00:06:49,056 --> 00:06:51,657
♪ We'll fetch the holy water
and holy soap, as well ♪

165
00:06:51,658 --> 00:06:54,494
♪ 'Cause, holy Guacamole,
that one reeks to holy hell ♪

166
00:06:54,495 --> 00:06:56,662
♪ And we're the Monks ♪

167
00:06:56,663 --> 00:06:58,331
♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪

168
00:06:58,332 --> 00:06:59,966
♪ Ooh wee-ahh ♪

169
00:06:59,967 --> 00:07:02,502
♪ Jazz hands ♪

170
00:07:02,503 --> 00:07:03,770
♪ Yeah! ♪

171
00:07:03,771 --> 00:07:06,039
Can't we just have a normal adventure?

172
00:07:08,108 --> 00:07:11,444
Is there anyone available
to counsel a person

173
00:07:11,445 --> 00:07:13,246
who might, through no fault of her own,

174
00:07:13,247 --> 00:07:15,815
be feeling guilty about a
fatal plot she's put into motion

175
00:07:15,816 --> 00:07:19,152
which could lead to the demise of someone
she's grown a little fond of?

176
00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:21,988
Just nod yes or no.

177
00:07:29,796 --> 00:07:31,864
Where are the kitchen trolls?

178
00:07:34,101 --> 00:07:35,001
Ah.

179
00:07:36,470 --> 00:07:38,371
Hey, m'lady.

180
00:07:38,372 --> 00:07:41,073
Who do I have to disembowel
around here to get a cup of tea?

181
00:07:41,074 --> 00:07:43,175
Oh, a thousand apologies.

182
00:07:43,176 --> 00:07:46,145
I was busy preparing
for tonight's celebration.

183
00:07:46,146 --> 00:07:47,446
Celebration for what?

184
00:07:47,447 --> 00:07:48,914
Oh, I... I wouldn't know.

185
00:07:48,915 --> 00:07:50,883
I-I'm just trying to stay alive,

186
00:07:50,884 --> 00:07:53,686
and I find it helps
not to ask too many questions.

187
00:07:58,925 --> 00:08:01,060
You're close with the king, aren't you?

188
00:08:01,061 --> 00:08:04,997
Eh, I wouldn't call us close,
but we hang, yeah.

189
00:08:05,932 --> 00:08:09,502
And, um, you fancy Gwynne, my hand maiden.

190
00:08:09,503 --> 00:08:11,303
Sha'!

191
00:08:11,304 --> 00:08:16,041
Listen, I know Richard's
keeping something from me.

192
00:08:16,042 --> 00:08:18,511
You find out what he has up his sleeve,

193
00:08:18,512 --> 00:08:22,715
and I will help you
get Gwynne into your bed.

194
00:08:22,716 --> 00:08:24,183
Ooh.

195
00:08:24,184 --> 00:08:26,118
A generous offer, My Queen,

196
00:08:26,119 --> 00:08:28,053
but I'm not even sure
we could both fit into my bed.

197
00:08:30,056 --> 00:08:31,390
You sleep in the kitchen?

198
00:08:31,391 --> 00:08:34,527
<i>Or...</i> Do I cook in my room?

199
00:08:34,528 --> 00:08:37,329
Why do I even talk to poor people?

200
00:08:37,330 --> 00:08:39,632
Do we have a deal?

201
00:08:39,633 --> 00:08:40,766
What the hell?

202
00:08:40,767 --> 00:08:43,068
I need all the help I can get.

203
00:08:43,069 --> 00:08:44,703
I sleep in a freaking kitchen.

204
00:08:44,704 --> 00:08:45,971
Okay.

205
00:08:45,972 --> 00:08:48,674
The king is having a secret meeting

206
00:08:48,675 --> 00:08:50,809
where I'm to serve snacks
and a light refreshment

207
00:08:50,810 --> 00:08:53,178
as soon as the croaks of the frogs

208
00:08:53,179 --> 00:08:55,080
usher in the raven's last call.

209
00:08:55,081 --> 00:08:56,815
So, like 9:00?

210
00:08:56,816 --> 00:08:58,350
Yeah, 9:00.

211
00:08:58,351 --> 00:08:59,651
Excellent.

212
00:08:59,652 --> 00:09:01,387
Take me there.

213
00:09:01,388 --> 00:09:03,389
Yes, m'lady.

214
00:09:03,390 --> 00:09:06,625
And King Richard said
if I didn't bring the jewel

215
00:09:06,626 --> 00:09:08,660
and Galavant back, he'd kill my parents.

216
00:09:08,661 --> 00:09:10,028
So, I lied to Galavant

217
00:09:10,029 --> 00:09:11,897
and told him
that the queen still loved him.

218
00:09:11,898 --> 00:09:13,999
He's walking into a trap of my own making!

219
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,701
What can I do?

220
00:09:16,999 --> 00:09:18,968
Break your vow, or I break your pipe.

221
00:09:21,808 --> 00:09:24,810
- ♪ Bum ba-dum bum bum bum ♪
- So, uh...

222
00:09:24,811 --> 00:09:26,311
♪ Bum ba-dum bum bum ♪

223
00:09:26,312 --> 00:09:29,581
So, basically, you made a deal
with the evil king,

224
00:09:29,582 --> 00:09:31,917
but that was before you fell
for the handsome knight...

225
00:09:31,918 --> 00:09:34,019
Fell... fell for what? Fell for him?

226
00:09:34,020 --> 00:09:36,088
My child, if you argue,
I'm never gonna be able

227
00:09:36,089 --> 00:09:37,656
to make it back in time
for their big finish.

228
00:09:37,657 --> 00:09:39,291
But I need your advice.

229
00:09:39,292 --> 00:09:41,059
I'm supposed to bring Galavant to the king

230
00:09:41,060 --> 00:09:43,895
when the barking of the hounds
wakens the fairies in the evening

231
00:09:43,896 --> 00:09:45,797
so that they may begin
their nocturnal dance.

232
00:09:45,798 --> 00:09:47,966
So, like 9:00?

233
00:09:47,967 --> 00:09:50,369
Yeah. 9:00.

234
00:09:52,572 --> 00:09:56,842
It's 9:03. Why am I the only one
who's ever on time?

235
00:09:58,344 --> 00:10:00,746
There should be a standardized system

236
00:10:00,747 --> 00:10:03,281
based on the rotation of the earth

237
00:10:03,282 --> 00:10:06,418
in relation to its position
to the sun and the moon.

238
00:10:06,419 --> 00:10:08,653
You sound like a witch.

239
00:10:08,654 --> 00:10:11,890
Regardless, it is very rude of Galavant

240
00:10:11,891 --> 00:10:13,892
to be late to his own killing.

241
00:10:13,893 --> 00:10:15,861
Galavant's coming?

242
00:10:15,862 --> 00:10:17,829
The king didn't give me a head count.

243
00:10:17,830 --> 00:10:19,998
Oh, I came up with the most<i> perfect</i> line

244
00:10:19,999 --> 00:10:21,600
for when I first see him.

245
00:10:21,601 --> 00:10:24,069
In my most intimidating voice,
I'm going to say,

246
00:10:24,070 --> 00:10:27,472
"Well, well, well"...

247
00:10:27,473 --> 00:10:29,040
Nope. I'm gonna save it.

248
00:10:30,076 --> 00:10:31,242
Oh. Here we go.

249
00:10:33,746 --> 00:10:36,014
Well, well...

250
00:10:37,183 --> 00:10:39,651
- Where the hell's Galavant?
- There's been a change in plans.

251
00:10:39,652 --> 00:10:42,787
You'll get the jewel
and set my parents free,

252
00:10:42,788 --> 00:10:44,255
but Galavant stays alive.

253
00:10:44,256 --> 00:10:46,157
I see.

254
00:10:46,158 --> 00:10:48,193
How utterly predictable.

255
00:10:48,194 --> 00:10:51,362
The princess has fallen
for the noble knight.

256
00:10:51,363 --> 00:10:53,264
Of course she has.

257
00:10:53,265 --> 00:10:55,233
I can't let a guy like that live.

258
00:10:55,234 --> 00:10:56,601
Well, then the deal is off.

259
00:10:56,602 --> 00:10:58,203
You'll never see the jewel again.

260
00:10:58,204 --> 00:11:01,139
You're adorable.

261
00:11:01,140 --> 00:11:02,574
No, my darling.

262
00:11:02,575 --> 00:11:05,343
You see, you will bring me Galavant

263
00:11:05,344 --> 00:11:10,086
<i>and</i> the jewel or else
you'll suffer the same fate...

264
00:11:10,088 --> 00:11:12,150
As your parents!

265
00:11:13,386 --> 00:11:16,422
- It's all right, honey.
- We're alive.

266
00:11:16,422 --> 00:11:17,344
What?!

267
00:11:17,346 --> 00:11:19,724
The king convinced us it would be funny.

268
00:11:19,725 --> 00:11:21,993
We've been prisoners a long time.

269
00:11:21,994 --> 00:11:23,494
We lost perspective.

270
00:11:23,495 --> 00:11:26,631
You should have seen your face!

271
00:11:26,632 --> 00:11:27,999
You were like, "aah!"

272
00:11:29,201 --> 00:11:30,334
"Ooh!"

273
00:11:30,335 --> 00:11:31,969
Oh, but make no mistake.

274
00:11:31,970 --> 00:11:33,838
If you don't bring me Galavant,
I will kill them.

275
00:11:35,140 --> 00:11:36,674
For realsies.

276
00:11:39,491 --> 00:11:43,558
♪ And we're the Monks,
hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪

277
00:11:43,560 --> 00:11:46,293
♪ Yeah ♪

278
00:11:46,295 --> 00:11:47,562
What's happening?

279
00:11:47,563 --> 00:11:48,897
I'll tell you what's happening.

280
00:11:48,898 --> 00:11:50,342
Our Sid sings like a freaking angel.

281
00:11:50,333 --> 00:11:52,467
No, this plan, this whole thing.

282
00:11:52,468 --> 00:11:55,337
- How did it come to this?
- Princess, relax.

283
00:11:55,338 --> 00:11:56,872
It's gonna go great.

284
00:11:56,873 --> 00:11:59,875
They already expect these guys
to perform at the castle.

285
00:11:59,876 --> 00:12:01,438
We're just gonna sneak in with them

286
00:12:01,440 --> 00:12:03,441
and infiltrate from the inside.

287
00:12:05,715 --> 00:12:07,716
Turns out you were right.

288
00:12:07,717 --> 00:12:09,851
As usual, I needed a better plan.

289
00:12:09,852 --> 00:12:11,186
Galavant...

290
00:12:11,187 --> 00:12:13,154
I'm only magnanimous once every 10 years,

291
00:12:13,155 --> 00:12:14,789
so just let this happen.

292
00:12:14,790 --> 00:12:17,759
You saw the best in me and...

293
00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:21,852
Ultimately reminded me what
it means to be a real knight.

294
00:12:22,031 --> 00:12:23,098
And here we are.

295
00:12:23,099 --> 00:12:25,567
So, thank you...

296
00:12:25,568 --> 00:12:29,838
For bringing me back to me.

297
00:12:29,839 --> 00:12:33,975
Against all the odds, it's, um...

298
00:12:33,976 --> 00:12:36,878
Well, it's been a pleasure.

299
00:12:36,879 --> 00:12:40,982
You really don't
have to thank me for anything.

300
00:12:40,983 --> 00:12:45,153
You actually have
a lot of nice qualities...

301
00:12:45,154 --> 00:12:46,388
All on your own.

302
00:12:47,189 --> 00:12:48,857
Careful, princess.

303
00:12:48,858 --> 00:12:50,859
You're getting dangerously close
to paying me a compliment.

304
00:12:50,860 --> 00:12:53,361
I can do compliments.

305
00:12:53,362 --> 00:12:56,331
I mean, you know your way around a horse,

306
00:12:56,332 --> 00:12:59,400
you're not so bad with a sword,

307
00:12:59,401 --> 00:13:02,470
and your beard magically stays
the same length all the time.

308
00:13:04,006 --> 00:13:09,077
And... you have an ability to see
the best in people

309
00:13:09,078 --> 00:13:11,513
even after they've wronged you.

310
00:13:13,582 --> 00:13:16,417
Like with Madalena.

311
00:13:16,418 --> 00:13:18,119
Right.

312
00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:19,787
Madalena.

313
00:13:19,788 --> 00:13:24,092
Oh, man, this robe
is really itching my junk.

314
00:13:24,093 --> 00:13:26,661
Oh, you left your clothes on underneath.

315
00:13:26,662 --> 00:13:27,829
Right.

316
00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:35,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

317
00:13:39,441 --> 00:13:42,076
I hope you're pleased
with what I've shown you.

318
00:13:42,077 --> 00:13:43,578
Judging by the pressure

319
00:13:43,579 --> 00:13:46,114
and what seems like the amount
of exclamation points,

320
00:13:46,115 --> 00:13:47,949
it's a little hard to tell.

321
00:13:47,950 --> 00:13:49,717
This is the writing of a happy queen

322
00:13:49,718 --> 00:13:53,121
who's decided to take control
and set a secret, evil plan in motion.

323
00:13:53,122 --> 00:13:54,789
Ooh!

324
00:13:54,790 --> 00:13:58,459
Let's keep that last part
just between the two of us.

325
00:13:58,460 --> 00:14:00,228
For your fastest pigeon.

326
00:14:00,229 --> 00:14:04,031
This absolutely, positively
has to be there overnight.

327
00:14:04,032 --> 00:14:07,835
You upheld your end of the
bargain, so I'll uphold mine.

328
00:14:07,837 --> 00:14:10,839
You have my permission to make
the most romantic of meals tonight

329
00:14:10,839 --> 00:14:12,406
for you and my hand maiden.

330
00:14:12,407 --> 00:14:14,375
Spare no expense...
Fresh oysters, braised rabbit,

331
00:14:14,376 --> 00:14:16,277
and a nice Bordeaux
from my private cellar.

332
00:14:16,278 --> 00:14:18,379
Oh, I don't even know if she'll say yes.

333
00:14:18,380 --> 00:14:21,782
I mean, we flirt and stuff,
but when I ask her on a date, bubkes.

334
00:14:21,783 --> 00:14:24,018
God, do I have to do everything
around here?

335
00:14:24,019 --> 00:14:25,853
Gwynne!

336
00:14:25,854 --> 00:14:28,289
You're having dinner tonight
with smallpox over here.

337
00:14:28,290 --> 00:14:30,191
Yes, m'lady.

338
00:14:30,192 --> 00:14:32,393
You two aren't cousins
or anything, are you?

339
00:14:32,394 --> 00:14:35,496
Ah, who cares? You guys couldn't
get any weirder looking.

340
00:14:40,535 --> 00:14:42,403
I know a hook-up from your boss

341
00:14:42,404 --> 00:14:44,839
isn't the smoothest thing, but...

342
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:46,874
I don't care.

343
00:14:46,875 --> 00:14:50,211
Because, truthfully, I think
we could be great together.

344
00:14:50,212 --> 00:14:53,647
But love isn't meant for people like us.

345
00:14:53,648 --> 00:14:56,484
I beg to differ.

346
00:14:59,354 --> 00:15:04,191
♪ If I could share my life with you ♪

347
00:15:04,192 --> 00:15:08,195
♪ Just think how happy we'd be ♪

348
00:15:08,196 --> 00:15:12,266
♪ We'd share our hovel built for two ♪

349
00:15:12,267 --> 00:15:14,468
♪ Complete with vermin for three ♪

350
00:15:16,037 --> 00:15:20,007
♪ We could while away each hopeless day ♪

351
00:15:20,008 --> 00:15:23,377
♪ Comparing open sores ♪

352
00:15:23,378 --> 00:15:27,448
♪ Yes, life would blow,
but much less, though ♪

353
00:15:27,449 --> 00:15:30,718
♪ If I could share mine with yours ♪

354
00:15:30,719 --> 00:15:33,787
No, I can't. It's impossible!

355
00:15:33,788 --> 00:15:37,624
♪ If I could share my life with you ♪

356
00:15:37,625 --> 00:15:40,627
♪ Admit it, it would be nice ♪

357
00:15:40,628 --> 00:15:45,265
♪ We'd share one cot, one chamber pot ♪

358
00:15:45,266 --> 00:15:49,470
♪ Plus trench mouth, tapeworms, and lice ♪

359
00:15:49,471 --> 00:15:52,906
♪ We would have a dozen kids ♪

360
00:15:52,907 --> 00:15:57,377
♪ And maybe one won't die ♪

361
00:15:57,378 --> 00:15:58,545
♪ And the plague ♪

362
00:15:58,546 --> 00:15:59,646
♪ The runs ♪

363
00:15:59,647 --> 00:16:01,615
♪ Invading huns ♪

364
00:16:01,616 --> 00:16:05,219
♪ Just think how time would fly ♪

365
00:16:05,220 --> 00:16:09,056
♪ If you could share your life with me ♪

366
00:16:09,057 --> 00:16:13,026
♪ I'll Cherish every foul breath ♪

367
00:16:13,027 --> 00:16:14,995
- ♪ The filth ♪
- ♪ The rot ♪

368
00:16:14,996 --> 00:16:17,264
♪ The leprosy ♪

369
00:16:17,265 --> 00:16:21,034
♪ The painful, lingering death ♪

370
00:16:21,035 --> 00:16:25,205
♪ Thank the Lord our life expectancy ♪

371
00:16:25,206 --> 00:16:27,974
♪ Is merely 32 ♪

372
00:16:30,178 --> 00:16:35,182
♪ Yeah, it might be sweet misery ♪

373
00:16:35,183 --> 00:16:46,325
♪ To share what's left with yo-o-o-u ♪

374
00:16:46,327 --> 00:16:50,730
So, me, you, dinner tonight, my place.

375
00:16:50,731 --> 00:16:52,332
You bring that pretty
little smile of yours,

376
00:16:52,333 --> 00:16:54,100
and I'll supply the rest.

377
00:16:54,101 --> 00:16:56,369
Yes!

378
00:17:06,414 --> 00:17:10,183
Right, princess. You ready
to get your kingdom back?

379
00:17:10,184 --> 00:17:11,818
I've been thinking.

380
00:17:11,819 --> 00:17:14,054
I can get another kingdom.
It's a buyer's market right now.

381
00:17:14,055 --> 00:17:15,522
Let's just free my parents,

382
00:17:15,523 --> 00:17:16,723
get Madalena, and get us out of here.

383
00:17:16,724 --> 00:17:17,891
Absolutely not.

384
00:17:17,892 --> 00:17:20,493
When I make a promise, I keep it.

385
00:17:20,494 --> 00:17:22,028
We're gonna get your kingdom back.

386
00:17:22,029 --> 00:17:23,396
- But...
- Once the concert starts,

387
00:17:23,397 --> 00:17:25,732
we're gonna have about an hour
to move about the castle.

388
00:17:25,733 --> 00:17:27,133
Where do you think
they're keeping your parents?

389
00:17:27,134 --> 00:17:31,070
Perhaps they're up your butt.

390
00:17:31,071 --> 00:17:34,174
Y-you see, because
that's the most unlikely place.

391
00:17:34,175 --> 00:17:37,409
I mean, obviously, her parents
couldn't be up your...

392
00:17:37,411 --> 00:17:39,245
Well, well, well.

393
00:17:39,246 --> 00:17:41,714
Ah, it's too late.
I had to go for the stupid butt joke.

394
00:17:41,715 --> 00:17:43,616
Forget it. Guards, just seize them.

395
00:17:51,458 --> 00:17:52,892
Your move...

396
00:17:52,893 --> 00:17:54,961
'Cause I haven't killed anybody all day.

397
00:17:54,962 --> 00:17:57,363
Gareth, we agreed
<i>I</i> would say the cool things.

398
00:17:57,364 --> 00:18:00,428
- So, what's it gonna be?
- Damn it, Gareth!

399
00:18:01,607 --> 00:18:02,769
Fine.

400
00:18:02,770 --> 00:18:04,036
Galavant, no!

401
00:18:04,037 --> 00:18:05,705
Now let her go.

402
00:18:05,706 --> 00:18:07,507
She had nothing to do with this.

403
00:18:07,508 --> 00:18:10,443
You are<i> so</i> noble.

404
00:18:10,444 --> 00:18:12,111
And yet the women in your life

405
00:18:12,112 --> 00:18:13,880
never seem to honor that nobility.

406
00:18:13,881 --> 00:18:17,083
In fact, this one tricked you
into coming all the way here

407
00:18:17,084 --> 00:18:18,518
so I could kill you.

408
00:18:21,555 --> 00:18:22,588
What?

409
00:18:23,957 --> 00:18:26,726
Well, well, well...

410
00:18:26,727 --> 00:18:29,462
Looks like it's time for dinner.

411
00:18:29,463 --> 00:18:32,264
- Nailed it.
- Boom.

412
00:18:35,254 --> 00:18:39,087
But... what the... all that time...

413
00:18:39,089 --> 00:18:41,157
He may not be able to talk, but I can.

414
00:18:41,158 --> 00:18:42,792
This is messed up, princess!

415
00:18:42,794 --> 00:18:44,962
I didn't have a choice.
He was going to kill my parents.

416
00:18:44,962 --> 00:18:46,162
Shut up!

417
00:18:47,498 --> 00:18:50,800
Well, seems like you kids
have lots to talk about.

418
00:18:50,801 --> 00:18:52,702
I'll let you get to it.

419
00:18:52,703 --> 00:18:54,137
Oh, but do hurry.

420
00:18:54,138 --> 00:18:56,606
I'm executing Galavant in 10 minutes. Hmm.

421
00:18:56,607 --> 00:18:59,342
It's nice to finally
have people down here.

422
00:18:59,343 --> 00:19:00,810
Feels lived in.

423
00:19:00,811 --> 00:19:04,180
I'm so sorry.
I wanted to tell you, but I...

424
00:19:04,181 --> 00:19:06,315
But what?

425
00:19:06,316 --> 00:19:08,139
You didn't have time?

426
00:19:08,185 --> 00:19:09,886
Not in the hundreds of miles we traveled

427
00:19:09,887 --> 00:19:11,587
or the meals we shared?

428
00:19:11,588 --> 00:19:15,858
In retrospect, the trip
through the forest of honesty

429
00:19:15,859 --> 00:19:17,360
would have seemed like
an appropriate time.

430
00:19:17,361 --> 00:19:18,928
But my family.

431
00:19:18,929 --> 00:19:22,699
Well, perhaps if you'd told me,
we could have made a plan.

432
00:19:22,700 --> 00:19:24,834
And you would have helped me?

433
00:19:24,835 --> 00:19:26,969
Even if you had nothing to gain from it?

434
00:19:26,970 --> 00:19:30,907
I guess we'll never find out.

435
00:19:33,377 --> 00:19:35,778
If even a single ounce of you was real,

436
00:19:35,779 --> 00:19:37,346
just tell me one thing...

437
00:19:37,347 --> 00:19:39,282
Did Madalena want me to come for her?

438
00:19:39,283 --> 00:19:41,584
I don't know.

439
00:19:45,389 --> 00:19:46,522
No!

440
00:20:09,212 --> 00:20:11,814
Not so tough, are you now,

441
00:20:11,815 --> 00:20:12,848
Galavan...

442
00:20:14,198 --> 00:20:15,084
Aah!!

443
00:20:15,085 --> 00:20:17,186
Aah!!

444
00:20:23,794 --> 00:20:26,595
Hello, darling.

445
00:20:26,596 --> 00:20:28,097
Madalena?

446
00:20:29,700 --> 00:20:34,103
There's braised rabbit
and Bordeaux, your favorites.

447
00:20:34,104 --> 00:20:36,739
<i>You</i> saved me?

448
00:20:36,740 --> 00:20:38,707
Oh, I've done a lot more than that.

449
00:20:44,347 --> 00:20:46,482
We have a lot of catching up to do.

450
00:20:48,433 --> 00:20:51,153
I've written someone,

451
00:20:51,154 --> 00:20:53,856
and he's coming to execute my plan.

452
00:20:53,857 --> 00:20:55,758
He doesn't play nice.

453
00:20:59,362 --> 00:21:01,515
Everything's about to change.

454
00:21:01,516 --> 00:21:03,516
<font color="#80ff80">sync and correction by solfieri
www.addic7ed.com</font>

454
00:21:04,305 --> 00:22:04,575
-= www.OpenSubtitles.org =-