1 00:00:02,235 --> 00:00:04,169 No, dude. 2 00:00:04,237 --> 00:00:07,365 It's not... It's not a question of individual style. It's about having some taste. 3 00:00:07,440 --> 00:00:10,068 You're attacking my ability to express myself, dude. 4 00:00:10,143 --> 00:00:12,941 How am I attacking your ability to... I just don't get it. 5 00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:16,005 What's not to get? "Come to Philly for the crack." 6 00:00:16,082 --> 00:00:18,550 - It has a picture of the Liberty Bell on it. - Yeah, but... 7 00:00:18,618 --> 00:00:21,519 - It's funny and original. - It's not fun... How is it funny and original? 8 00:00:21,588 --> 00:00:25,024 Every asshole on South Street's wearing a T-shirt with an ironic slogan on it. 9 00:00:25,091 --> 00:00:29,858 Well, excuse me if all my T-shirts don't have a little guy playing polo on the lapel. 10 00:00:29,929 --> 00:00:31,920 You cut the sleeves off of all your T-shirts. 11 00:00:31,998 --> 00:00:34,592 What, so you can show off your tats? Those are really original, dude. 12 00:00:34,667 --> 00:00:37,727 - They're tribal. - Oh, they're trib... I'm sorry. What tribe are you from? 13 00:00:37,804 --> 00:00:40,068 - What? Is it, like, an Indian tribe or... - Okay, okay, okay. 14 00:00:40,140 --> 00:00:42,973 - You guys gonna let me in this game or what? - No. You're the ref. 15 00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:46,069 - I don't want to ref anymore. I'd like to play, so... - You're an excellent ref. 16 00:00:46,146 --> 00:00:49,980 - You're a very good ref. - Yeah, I know. I'm a great ref. I'd like to play the game now. 17 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:53,451 - Are you gonna get mad? You gonna turn into the mad munchkin? - What's the ma... 18 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:55,818 - Do you represent the Lollipop Guild, Charlie? - Do you? 19 00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:58,380 Hey, Charlie. 20 00:01:02,328 --> 00:01:06,424 - That's a mad munchkin dance? Oh, okay. This is what we do? - I need to talk to you. 21 00:01:09,602 --> 00:01:11,297 It's about our son! 22 00:01:17,410 --> 00:01:19,742 Nobody wants to hear that. 23 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:27,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 24 00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:49,773 - So, wait, she's sayin'this is your son? - I don't know. 25 00:01:49,843 --> 00:01:52,004 - Sounds like a bunch of bullshit to me, Charlie. - I know! 26 00:01:52,078 --> 00:01:54,308 I know it. There's, like, no way that this is possible. 27 00:01:54,380 --> 00:01:57,872 - Well, did you have sex with her? - Yeah. 28 00:01:57,951 --> 00:02:00,249 Okay. Did you use birth control? 29 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:02,720 - Oh, Dee, we went to Catholic school, so... - Okay. You're allowed... 30 00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:05,519 to have premarital sex, but you're not allowed to use birth control? 31 00:02:05,592 --> 00:02:08,220 No. All right. You're twisting words here and, like, gettin' cute. 32 00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:10,228 When did she have this kid? 33 00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:13,322 - It's been, like, 10 years since I've even seen her, so... - Ten years? 34 00:02:13,399 --> 00:02:15,424 - What does she want? - Well, that's... that's the weird thing. 35 00:02:15,502 --> 00:02:18,130 She doesn't want money or anything. She just wants me to meet him. 36 00:02:18,204 --> 00:02:19,796 - Are you gonna do it? - No. 37 00:02:19,873 --> 00:02:22,842 Well, dude, you gotta meet the kid. I mean, you gotta find out for sure. 38 00:02:22,909 --> 00:02:25,878 Yeah, I guess. It's just... 39 00:02:25,945 --> 00:02:29,642 I mean, I wish I could go back in time and do the right thing, you know? 40 00:02:29,716 --> 00:02:33,015 - Like be there for him? - No. Get her an abortion. 41 00:02:34,687 --> 00:02:39,056 So you're not allowed to use birth control, but abortions are no problem? 42 00:02:39,125 --> 00:02:41,491 All right. Okay. So now you're, like, a word genius. 43 00:02:41,561 --> 00:02:44,587 And everything I say, you twist it around and make me look dumb. 44 00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:47,633 Charlie's right though. He should have at least had a say in the matter. 45 00:02:47,700 --> 00:02:49,793 - It's her body, and it's her decision. - No, I'm sorry. 46 00:02:49,869 --> 00:02:52,337 It's not just her decision. The man should get a vote. 47 00:02:52,405 --> 00:02:55,238 - Okay. Well, ultimately it's her choice. - It is not just her choice. 48 00:02:55,308 --> 00:02:58,471 It's nobody's choice. It should be left up to God. 49 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:02,414 Is he... Is that... Are you joking? 50 00:03:02,482 --> 00:03:06,919 No, it's not a joke! You remember Genesis, Book Two, Verse Three? 51 00:03:06,986 --> 00:03:11,013 "And he breathed into the nostrils of Adam on the first day. And it was good." 52 00:03:11,090 --> 00:03:13,718 Right in his nostrils, huh? Sounds really uncomfortable. 53 00:03:13,793 --> 00:03:17,058 You're making an asshole out of yourself. Dude, you need to get a blood test, okay? 54 00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:19,564 - I remember Stacy Corvelli. She was a slut. - You're right. You're right. 55 00:03:19,632 --> 00:03:22,066 Uh, Mac, what's God's stance on blood tests? 56 00:03:22,135 --> 00:03:24,831 Hmm. I don't know. I'd have to check. 57 00:03:30,577 --> 00:03:32,568 All right, you feeling good? 58 00:03:32,645 --> 00:03:35,079 No. I feel nauseous. I think I'm gonna go. I'm gonna run. 59 00:03:35,148 --> 00:03:36,809 - No, no, no. It's... - I should go. 60 00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:38,578 - Hi. Hey, Charlie. - Hi. 61 00:03:38,651 --> 00:03:40,414 - Hey. - You brought your, uh... 62 00:03:40,486 --> 00:03:43,751 Uh, Dennis Reynolds. We didn't get a chance to talk before, but I remember you. Yeah. 63 00:03:43,823 --> 00:03:45,757 - You went to St. Giles? - I did. Yeah. 64 00:03:45,825 --> 00:03:47,656 - Ah. - With... Yeah. 65 00:03:47,727 --> 00:03:49,661 So you two are together now, or... 66 00:03:50,730 --> 00:03:52,721 - No. - No. No. 67 00:03:52,799 --> 00:03:54,960 - No. I'm just here for moral support. - Yeah, we're not... 68 00:03:55,034 --> 00:03:57,025 That's not even a... 69 00:03:57,103 --> 00:03:59,298 - I brought him along. - Yeah. 70 00:03:59,372 --> 00:04:01,863 - So... - All right. Come on in. 71 00:04:07,013 --> 00:04:09,675 I'm real glad you decided to do this, Charlie. 72 00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:13,207 Yeah. Well, uh, you know, it's the least I could do, so... 73 00:04:13,286 --> 00:04:16,084 Yeah. Sorry I don't have a lot of time. I gotta get to work. 74 00:04:16,155 --> 00:04:18,555 Uh, Tommy, come on in here, Son! 75 00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:20,786 What do you want, Mom? 76 00:04:20,860 --> 00:04:22,828 He's a bit of a handful. 77 00:04:22,895 --> 00:04:25,125 Uh, Charlie and his friend are here. 78 00:04:25,198 --> 00:04:27,166 So goddamn what? 79 00:04:27,233 --> 00:04:29,224 Tommy, come in here, please! 80 00:04:29,302 --> 00:04:31,270 This is bullshit. 81 00:04:31,337 --> 00:04:34,568 - Whoa! - Language, please. 82 00:04:34,641 --> 00:04:37,872 - Which one of you fags is supposed to be my dad? - Whoa, hello. 83 00:04:37,944 --> 00:04:39,878 - Right off the bat with the... - Yeah. 84 00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:43,780 Tommy, be nice. Huh? This is Charlie. 85 00:04:43,850 --> 00:04:46,978 Are you serious? This is the guy? 86 00:04:47,053 --> 00:04:49,419 What's that... What's that supposed to mean, buddy? 87 00:04:49,489 --> 00:04:52,788 Okay. Well, I should be home around 8:00. Uh, what do you guys have planned? 88 00:04:52,859 --> 00:04:55,919 - Uh, I thought we'd go to the park. - Huh. That sounds nice. 89 00:04:55,995 --> 00:04:58,395 - Wanna go to the park, Tommy? - I don't care. 90 00:04:58,464 --> 00:05:01,661 Okay. That's great. Bye, sweetie. 91 00:05:01,734 --> 00:05:04,396 Have fun, boys. 92 00:05:04,470 --> 00:05:06,836 I'm not goin' to the park. 93 00:05:06,906 --> 00:05:09,067 No shit. 94 00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:12,911 What is this place? 95 00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:17,211 Uh, this is a place where we're gonna go see a special friend of mine. 96 00:05:17,283 --> 00:05:20,411 - Why? - 'Cause he's gonna help us figure something very important out. 97 00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:22,716 - It's gonna be good to know. - Why? 98 00:05:22,789 --> 00:05:25,485 - Because I said so. No more questions, okay, buddy? - Why? 99 00:05:25,558 --> 00:05:27,048 - Stop saying "why." - Why? 100 00:05:27,126 --> 00:05:28,753 - Stop it. I don't like this game. - Why? Why? 101 00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:30,625 - Is this a game? This is your game? - Why? Why? 102 00:05:30,697 --> 00:05:33,097 Hey, pretty boy. 103 00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:35,191 What you here for? 104 00:05:35,268 --> 00:05:38,726 My friend's gettin' a... blood test. 105 00:05:38,805 --> 00:05:40,773 Your boyfriend? 106 00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:43,638 No. He's not my... He's not my boyfriend. 107 00:05:43,710 --> 00:05:45,644 He got Al DS? 108 00:05:45,712 --> 00:05:47,805 I don't... I don't think so. 109 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:50,007 - Do you? - No, I don't. 110 00:05:50,083 --> 00:05:52,449 I'll blow you for $10. 111 00:05:55,988 --> 00:05:58,957 You know what? Let me consult some of this free literature... 112 00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:00,959 they got here regarding that proposition. 113 00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:02,961 Oh. You know what? 114 00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:06,089 According to this, that's not really a good idea. So I'm gonna have to pass. 115 00:06:06,165 --> 00:06:08,224 But thanks. I appreciate it. Really nice of you. 116 00:06:08,301 --> 00:06:10,394 - He's playin' mind games, dude. - I wanna leave. 117 00:06:10,470 --> 00:06:12,904 - Hey, it's tough. - What are we doin' here? 118 00:06:12,972 --> 00:06:15,770 Don't answer that. It's a trick question. He tries to get in your head. 119 00:06:15,842 --> 00:06:18,504 - It's a little game he plays. - No, let... let me answer the question. 120 00:06:18,578 --> 00:06:21,308 See, we're at a free clinic, Tommy. Charlie doesn't have health insurance. 121 00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:23,542 See this lady back here? Take a look. 122 00:06:23,616 --> 00:06:26,915 That's what you get when you don't have health insurance. 123 00:06:28,955 --> 00:06:30,946 - I wanna go to the mall! - Keep your voice down. 124 00:06:31,023 --> 00:06:32,820 - I wanna go to the mall! - Keep your voice... 125 00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:34,553 - I wanna go to the mall! - Stop yelling... 126 00:06:34,627 --> 00:06:37,095 - I wanna go to the... - Stop your yelling. We need to... Ow! 127 00:06:37,163 --> 00:06:39,324 - He's biting my hand! He's biting my hand! - Come on. 128 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:41,458 Let's go. Let's go. 129 00:06:43,536 --> 00:06:46,767 Sacred Right. It's a child, not a choice. Mm-hmm. 130 00:06:46,839 --> 00:06:50,366 All righty. I'll make sure he gets the message. Thank you. 131 00:06:50,443 --> 00:06:51,933 - Hi. - Hi. 132 00:06:52,011 --> 00:06:54,844 - So I was having an argument with some friends the other day. - Uh-huh. 133 00:06:54,914 --> 00:06:57,542 And I was wondering if you could help me out with some information. 134 00:06:57,617 --> 00:07:00,450 - Are you interested in joining our cause? - No. 135 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:03,717 No. Actually, just looking for some info on the Bible, Jesus, that kind of thing. 136 00:07:03,790 --> 00:07:07,556 - Well, if you join our mailing list, the reverend... - Okay, listen to me. 137 00:07:07,627 --> 00:07:10,687 I don't really wanna join your little freak show. Just looking for some information. 138 00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:13,357 So if you could point me in the right direction, that'd be great. 139 00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:15,526 - Well, we have some literature... - Great. Thank you. Thanks. 140 00:07:15,601 --> 00:07:18,069 On the display back by the water cooler. 141 00:07:23,476 --> 00:07:25,842 Oh, mama. 142 00:07:25,912 --> 00:07:28,005 - Hey, there. - Hi. 143 00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:30,514 - Hey. - Oh, are you here to sign up for the rally? 144 00:07:30,583 --> 00:07:32,551 - Yes, I am. - Great. 145 00:07:32,618 --> 00:07:35,883 - Yeah, real excited about the rally. - We're gonna kick ass this time. 146 00:07:35,955 --> 00:07:39,482 Well, I'm ready to kick somebody's ass, I'll tell you what. I hate those bastards. 147 00:07:39,559 --> 00:07:41,493 Wow! That's... 148 00:07:41,561 --> 00:07:44,394 - Uh, hate's a very strong word. - Yeah. 149 00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:47,627 Yeah, well, let me tell you something, Megan. 150 00:07:47,700 --> 00:07:51,295 I hate dead baby fetuses, you know? 151 00:07:51,370 --> 00:07:54,339 I hate them because they're dead, and they shouldn't be. 152 00:07:54,407 --> 00:07:57,399 They should be alive, and they should be loved. 153 00:07:57,477 --> 00:08:00,742 Oh! Wow! 154 00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:04,146 - You just... You seem really passionate. - Yeah. 155 00:08:04,217 --> 00:08:06,310 More than you know. 156 00:08:11,257 --> 00:08:14,590 - Nice kid, Charlie. - What the hell do you think is wrong with that kid? 157 00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:17,185 You've gotta get that blood test, dude. 158 00:08:17,263 --> 00:08:21,199 - Die! Die! Die! - No! Hey! Whoa, Tommy! No! 159 00:08:21,267 --> 00:08:23,497 No! No! No! Give me the stick! Give me the stick! 160 00:08:23,569 --> 00:08:25,764 Come on! This place sucks! I wanna go to the mall! 161 00:08:25,838 --> 00:08:28,830 - We can't go to the mall, all right? - Shut up! I'm the boss of you! 162 00:08:28,908 --> 00:08:32,139 - You're not the boss of me! - I am the boss! I wanna go to the mall! 163 00:08:32,211 --> 00:08:34,907 - I'll show you who's the boss of who. - Let's go to the mall! 164 00:08:34,981 --> 00:08:37,677 - You wanna go to the mall? - I wanna go to the mall! 165 00:08:37,750 --> 00:08:40,241 You could ask nice. Dennis, let's go. We're goin' to the mall. 166 00:08:40,319 --> 00:08:43,777 - I'm not spending any more time with that kid. - Come on, dude! Fine. Great. 167 00:08:43,856 --> 00:08:47,155 Dee... Dee, will you just... Can we go to the mall? Will you drive me? 168 00:08:47,226 --> 00:08:50,559 - I guess, if Dennis watches the bar. - That's fine. 169 00:08:50,630 --> 00:08:52,621 Great. Fine. Thank you. 170 00:08:57,136 --> 00:08:59,070 - You're ugly. - You're ugly. 171 00:08:59,138 --> 00:09:00,935 - You're ugly! - You are the one that's ugly! 172 00:09:01,007 --> 00:09:03,942 Charlie! Jesus Christ! Are you almost 30? Are you almost 30 years old? 173 00:09:04,010 --> 00:09:06,103 - Yes! - You have to buy me a toy! 174 00:09:06,178 --> 00:09:08,772 - I don't have to buy you shit. - If you don't buy me anything... 175 00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:11,442 I'm gonna tell my mom you took me to a black people's house. 176 00:09:11,517 --> 00:09:14,315 - Okay. - Wow! Oh, my God, that's racist. What do you say to that? 177 00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:16,821 - I don't say anything. - You still have to buy me a toy! 178 00:09:20,993 --> 00:09:23,655 Charlie, what in the hell are you gonna do if this kid's yours? 179 00:09:23,729 --> 00:09:26,596 Oh, I don't know. I'll probably, uh, kill myself. 180 00:09:26,666 --> 00:09:29,328 Whoa! Isn't that your waitress from the coffee shop? 181 00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:31,427 Cool. Stewie. 182 00:09:31,504 --> 00:09:33,529 - Oh, my God. - Go talk to her. 183 00:09:33,606 --> 00:09:35,699 - What? No. - Come on. Go talk to her. 184 00:09:35,775 --> 00:09:37,970 - No, dude. - You've been in love with this girl forever. 185 00:09:38,044 --> 00:09:41,275 I know that. You know what? Come with me and pretend you're my girlfriend. 186 00:09:41,347 --> 00:09:43,281 - It'll make her jealous. - No. I won't do that. 187 00:09:43,349 --> 00:09:45,283 - Come on. It's gonna work. - No. No, it's not. 188 00:09:45,351 --> 00:09:47,342 - All right. Come stand next to me then. - Why? 189 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,854 - So she doesn't think I'm creepy. - Well, you are creepy. 190 00:09:49,922 --> 00:09:53,449 - I realize this. That's why I need you. - All right. Let's go. 191 00:09:53,526 --> 00:09:55,460 - Thank you. - Stop sweating. 192 00:09:55,528 --> 00:09:57,860 Then we can grab him if you like him, okay? 193 00:09:57,930 --> 00:09:59,864 Hey. Fancy seeing you here. 194 00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:01,866 Oh. Hello, Charlie. 195 00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:05,130 Buying toys, are you? 196 00:10:05,204 --> 00:10:07,035 Yeah. 197 00:10:07,106 --> 00:10:10,564 - Cool. This is my, uh... - Friend. We're good friends. 198 00:10:10,643 --> 00:10:11,974 - Hi. - Hi. 199 00:10:12,044 --> 00:10:14,569 - Is that cute little girl your... - I'm her big sister. 200 00:10:14,647 --> 00:10:17,115 Oh. 201 00:10:17,183 --> 00:10:19,174 Hmm, that's weird. She looks Mexican. 202 00:10:20,886 --> 00:10:24,413 She is Mexican. It's the Big Sister program. She's not my real little sister. 203 00:10:24,490 --> 00:10:28,426 That is such a coincidence. That's exactly what we're here doing. 204 00:10:28,494 --> 00:10:30,894 - What? - Yeah. Do you see that, um... 205 00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:33,796 adorable little guy over there? 206 00:10:33,866 --> 00:10:36,391 That's Charlie's little brother. 207 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:38,403 - Really? - Mm-hmm. 208 00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:40,735 - Yeah. - No way. You're involved in the program? 209 00:10:40,806 --> 00:10:42,740 Yeah! 210 00:10:42,808 --> 00:10:45,299 Well, that's... I didn't know you were involved in the program. 211 00:10:45,378 --> 00:10:48,006 - I love the program! - It's one of his favorite programs. 212 00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:51,015 - Yeah. I've... I've been in the program since... - A long time now. 213 00:10:51,083 --> 00:10:54,416 I guess you're gonna be going to the picnic then at Fairmount Park. 214 00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:55,977 - Right. - Saturday? 215 00:10:56,055 --> 00:10:58,785 - Saturday. - Yeah. Are you there? Are you goin'? Are you gonna be there? 216 00:10:58,858 --> 00:11:00,826 - I will be there on Saturday, yes. - Great. 217 00:11:00,893 --> 00:11:02,884 - Maybe we'll see you there. - Maybe. Or you know what? 218 00:11:02,962 --> 00:11:06,523 - Or... maybe we could carpool. You know what I mean? - Carpool? 219 00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:08,863 Yeah. Well, come on. Think about it. We'll save the environment. 220 00:11:08,934 --> 00:11:11,334 - We'll team up. It'll be good. - This is smart. Reduce, reuse, recycle. 221 00:11:11,404 --> 00:11:13,804 - You should do it. - The kids will love it. The kids... 222 00:11:13,873 --> 00:11:15,807 He loves Mexicans. 223 00:11:15,875 --> 00:11:18,469 All right. 224 00:11:18,544 --> 00:11:20,671 - Sure. Let's do it. - Oh! 225 00:11:21,714 --> 00:11:24,877 - Okay. Yeah. - Great. 226 00:11:24,950 --> 00:11:27,180 - Great. Okay, well... - Nice to meet you too. I'll see you. 227 00:11:27,253 --> 00:11:30,313 - I gotta go get my little sister. Okay, bye. - Bye. 228 00:11:30,389 --> 00:11:34,189 - Thank you. - You're still pretty sweaty. 229 00:11:36,394 --> 00:11:40,626 Baby killer! Baby killer! Baby killer! 230 00:11:40,698 --> 00:11:43,189 You bastards are gonna burn in hell! 231 00:11:43,268 --> 00:11:46,931 Abortion is murder! It's a child, not a choice! 232 00:11:47,005 --> 00:11:48,939 Pro-choice is pro-death! 233 00:11:49,007 --> 00:11:51,271 Wow! Great rhetoric. 234 00:11:51,342 --> 00:11:53,242 - Thank you. - Hey, you're really hard-core, aren't you? 235 00:11:53,311 --> 00:11:56,246 Oh, well, you know. I mean, if you really wanna see hard-core... 236 00:11:56,314 --> 00:12:00,045 - What's this? - That's the list of doctors I'm gonna kill. 237 00:12:00,118 --> 00:12:03,849 - There's two already crossed out. - Yeah, I know. 238 00:12:13,164 --> 00:12:15,928 - So you really had a good time, huh? - Yeah. We had a blast. 239 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,662 - Hmm. He didn't give you any problems? - No. Not a single problem. 240 00:12:18,736 --> 00:12:21,671 Uh, listen, I was thinking maybe I could take him out this Saturday? 241 00:12:23,608 --> 00:12:26,668 - Really? - Yeah, sure. I'd pick him up at, like, 8:00? 242 00:12:26,744 --> 00:12:28,735 You know, do the father-son thing. 243 00:12:28,813 --> 00:12:32,579 Are you all right? Is that gonna be okay? Because I could really use... use him. 244 00:12:32,650 --> 00:12:34,641 - Goddamn it! - I'm sorry. Is everything all right? 245 00:12:34,719 --> 00:12:38,018 I can't do this! Tommy's not your son. 246 00:12:39,390 --> 00:12:41,858 - What? - RememberJimmy Doyle from high school? 247 00:12:41,926 --> 00:12:45,623 That son of a bitch is Tommy's real father. He left me six months ago. 248 00:12:45,697 --> 00:12:48,393 - You know what a nightmare it's been since he left? - I don't care. 249 00:12:48,466 --> 00:12:52,425 - I can't raise Tommy alone. - I don't care! You thought you'd just pawn your son off on me? 250 00:12:52,503 --> 00:12:56,564 What else? I thought I could find him a better role model than that piece of shit! 251 00:12:56,641 --> 00:13:00,372 Stop talking! Wait. Let me think. 252 00:13:00,445 --> 00:13:04,438 God! All right. So can I still take him out on Saturday? 253 00:13:05,483 --> 00:13:07,474 - Yeah. - Great. 254 00:13:09,454 --> 00:13:12,514 - That's pretty thin. That might be too thin. - Hey-oh! 255 00:13:12,590 --> 00:13:15,787 - Hey, Mac. Where you been? - Oh, I don't know. Saving humanity. 256 00:13:15,860 --> 00:13:18,260 - Are you still on this kick, dude? - Yeah, you know, Den... 257 00:13:18,329 --> 00:13:20,661 I was thinking what you were saying the other day... 258 00:13:20,732 --> 00:13:22,962 about the T-shirts with the stupid slogans on them. 259 00:13:23,034 --> 00:13:25,502 And I was wondering what you think about this? 260 00:13:25,570 --> 00:13:28,539 Huh, bitch? Yeah! Is that stupid enough for you? 261 00:13:28,606 --> 00:13:30,767 You're not seriously wearing that, are you? You look ridiculous. 262 00:13:30,842 --> 00:13:34,369 - Whatever, dude. - You know, that's the problem with you antiabortionists. 263 00:13:34,445 --> 00:13:37,573 You cry about the sanctity of life, and then you wear a shirt like that. 264 00:13:37,648 --> 00:13:41,311 - I'm not listening to you. - Aren't you right-wingers all about the death penalty too? 265 00:13:41,386 --> 00:13:44,014 - Does that not involve killing somebody? - Right, right, right. 266 00:13:44,088 --> 00:13:46,386 And you liberals are against killing murderers. 267 00:13:46,457 --> 00:13:48,448 But you're for killing innocent babies. That's interesting. 268 00:13:48,526 --> 00:13:51,393 - Yeah. We like to kill babies. - You guys are taking this way too seriously. 269 00:13:51,462 --> 00:13:53,362 Den, you don't understand the week I've been having. 270 00:13:53,431 --> 00:13:56,195 I met a girl at one of these organizations who is a freak. 271 00:13:56,267 --> 00:13:58,258 She is the dirtiest chick I've met in my life. 272 00:13:58,336 --> 00:14:01,567 - Seriously? - Yeah. You gotta come with me to one of these rallies. 273 00:14:01,639 --> 00:14:05,735 They're having another one on Saturday. These chicks are everywhere. 274 00:14:05,810 --> 00:14:08,677 - I can jump on board with that. - Yeah! 275 00:14:08,746 --> 00:14:12,580 Are you actually gonna throw away all your convictions for a chance to get laid? 276 00:14:12,650 --> 00:14:15,414 I don't really have any convictions. 277 00:14:15,486 --> 00:14:17,147 Where is this rally being held? 278 00:14:17,221 --> 00:14:19,712 Uh, Planned Parenthood, Bryn Mawr Medical Center. 279 00:14:19,791 --> 00:14:22,885 Well, I'm gonna go. At least one pro-choice voice is gonna be heard. 280 00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:25,520 One? There was, like, tons of those chicks at the last one. 281 00:14:25,596 --> 00:14:29,362 - Which side had more? - Oh, which one do you think? 282 00:14:29,434 --> 00:14:31,493 The one that cares about protecting women's bodies... 283 00:14:31,569 --> 00:14:34,037 or the one that's run by the religious right? 284 00:14:35,306 --> 00:14:37,297 Probably the side you're goin' to. 285 00:14:37,375 --> 00:14:39,468 I'm gonna fight for the right to choose. 286 00:14:39,544 --> 00:14:42,172 You're a scumbag, Dennis. 287 00:14:47,251 --> 00:14:50,778 - Today's a big day for me, Tommy. - Why? 288 00:14:50,855 --> 00:14:54,416 Well, today is probably the best chance I'm ever gonna have of hooking up with this girl. 289 00:14:54,492 --> 00:14:57,290 So, uh, look at me for a second, pal. Okay, do me a favor. 290 00:14:57,361 --> 00:14:59,295 If you're good today, I'm gonna buy you... 291 00:14:59,363 --> 00:15:01,354 anything that you want, anything in the world, all right? 292 00:15:02,967 --> 00:15:05,367 Oh, my God! 293 00:15:05,436 --> 00:15:09,031 I will smash your face into a... into a jelly! 294 00:15:12,143 --> 00:15:14,077 Wrong key. 295 00:15:14,145 --> 00:15:17,979 Keep abortion legal! Keep abortion legal! 296 00:15:18,049 --> 00:15:21,041 Stop abortion now! Stop abortion now! 297 00:15:21,118 --> 00:15:23,177 This is crazy. 298 00:15:23,254 --> 00:15:26,917 Yeah, weird. People actually care about women's bodies. You believe that? 299 00:15:26,991 --> 00:15:28,925 Yeah. I think Mac picked the wrong side. 300 00:15:28,993 --> 00:15:31,427 - There's, like, no dudes here. - Gross. 301 00:15:32,497 --> 00:15:34,795 You know what? Uh, give me a second here. 302 00:15:38,703 --> 00:15:41,331 - Hi. - Hi. 303 00:15:41,405 --> 00:15:43,498 - I like your look. - Excuse me? 304 00:15:43,574 --> 00:15:45,701 I like the whole hippie thing. 305 00:15:45,776 --> 00:15:47,676 It really works for you. 306 00:15:47,745 --> 00:15:52,307 - Get lost, breeder. - Oh, okay. 307 00:15:54,385 --> 00:15:56,376 Yeah. Mmm. 308 00:15:57,855 --> 00:16:02,292 - I love the smell of protest in the morning. - What? 309 00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:05,158 I was quoting that movie, you know, Apocalypse Now. "Napalm in the morning." 310 00:16:05,229 --> 00:16:08,392 - Is that the new Mel Gibson movie? - No. 311 00:16:08,466 --> 00:16:11,629 Did you see Passion of the Christ? I saw it 12 times. 312 00:16:13,671 --> 00:16:16,196 Okay. 313 00:16:18,442 --> 00:16:21,775 You know, you really shouldn't joke about the Apocalypse. 314 00:16:25,082 --> 00:16:27,573 So just fill these out. We'll get your information in the mail. 315 00:16:27,652 --> 00:16:29,711 Thanks. 316 00:16:29,787 --> 00:16:31,652 "Keep your laws"... I like your T-shirt. 317 00:16:31,722 --> 00:16:33,952 - Thanks. - Yeah. Where do I sign? 318 00:16:34,025 --> 00:16:37,153 - Right here. - Love T-shirts like that. 319 00:16:37,228 --> 00:16:39,219 Right. 320 00:16:39,297 --> 00:16:42,323 So, do you come to these kind of things often, or... 321 00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:45,164 Are you hitting on me at an abortion rally? 322 00:16:45,236 --> 00:16:47,227 Yeah, I... 323 00:16:52,443 --> 00:16:54,809 You know what? I think all these chicks are gay. 324 00:16:54,879 --> 00:16:56,870 Yeah, I don't know that they're gay. 325 00:16:56,948 --> 00:16:59,212 I think they can just smell how disgusting you are. 326 00:16:59,283 --> 00:17:01,410 That sucks for me. 327 00:17:05,723 --> 00:17:07,623 Hello. 328 00:17:07,692 --> 00:17:09,887 Hey, Mac. It's Dennis. 329 00:17:09,961 --> 00:17:12,521 Uh, look, man, there's no talent over here. What's the deal over there? 330 00:17:12,597 --> 00:17:15,532 Oh, yeah. We're lookin' real good over here, bro. 331 00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:18,933 - What do you think? - Hop the fence and come over. 332 00:17:19,003 --> 00:17:20,971 All right. I'll see you in a second. 333 00:17:21,038 --> 00:17:23,006 Later, gator. 334 00:17:23,074 --> 00:17:25,565 All right, Megan. I'm finished. 335 00:17:27,044 --> 00:17:30,036 You are a genius. 336 00:17:32,049 --> 00:17:35,985 Hey, Sis. I'm gonna jet. 337 00:17:36,053 --> 00:17:38,715 - You're leaving? - Uh, this side sucks. 338 00:17:38,789 --> 00:17:40,814 I'm gonna try my luck over there. 339 00:17:40,891 --> 00:17:43,223 - Are you kidding me? - Later, tater. 340 00:17:43,294 --> 00:17:46,195 Dennis, you are such a jackass! 341 00:17:46,263 --> 00:17:48,231 Excuse me. Excuse me. 342 00:17:48,299 --> 00:17:50,859 Yeah. Can I get by here? Thanks. 343 00:17:53,070 --> 00:17:56,665 I just... I really love that sign. I wondered that so many times. 344 00:17:56,741 --> 00:17:58,641 Hey, there's a guy on the fence. 345 00:18:01,212 --> 00:18:03,146 Hey! Hey! They're coming after us! 346 00:18:03,214 --> 00:18:07,048 - No. They're not coming after us. - I'll show you what we do to them. How's your aim? 347 00:18:07,118 --> 00:18:09,678 Pretty good. But I don't think that's such a good idea. 348 00:18:09,754 --> 00:18:12,655 - I don't think... - Hey, it's okay. These people deserve this. 349 00:18:14,759 --> 00:18:18,217 Yeah. He looks like he deserves it. Maybe just one. 350 00:18:18,295 --> 00:18:21,093 Oh! Ow! 351 00:18:21,165 --> 00:18:23,429 Yeah! Come on! Get your eggs, people! 352 00:18:23,501 --> 00:18:25,731 - Oh, my God! - Ow! 353 00:18:25,803 --> 00:18:28,966 - Shit! They're throwing eggs! - They did this last time. 354 00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:31,440 I came prepared. 355 00:18:31,509 --> 00:18:34,410 Oh. Hey, Dennis! How's the action over there, buddy? 356 00:18:34,478 --> 00:18:37,504 - What? What the hell are you doing? - Oh! They're coming... 357 00:18:37,581 --> 00:18:39,481 - Now they're coming back. - Die! 358 00:18:39,550 --> 00:18:42,383 - Hey! - Hot chicks on that side, Dennis? 359 00:18:45,389 --> 00:18:47,323 You're gonna burn in hell! 360 00:18:50,027 --> 00:18:52,928 Stop! Stop! Stop! 361 00:18:52,997 --> 00:18:55,465 Hey, guess what. I have a surprise for you. 362 00:18:55,533 --> 00:18:58,058 - What? - It's a real miracle. 363 00:18:58,135 --> 00:18:59,796 - What is it? - I'm pregnant! 364 00:18:59,870 --> 00:19:01,804 What? 365 00:19:01,872 --> 00:19:03,635 I'm pregnant! 366 00:19:06,310 --> 00:19:08,301 You gotta get an abortion. 367 00:19:10,281 --> 00:19:12,249 - Megan, wait, wait, wait! - Stop talking to me! 368 00:19:12,316 --> 00:19:14,307 Well, listen, I just think our situation is different. 369 00:19:14,385 --> 00:19:17,684 - How is our situation different? - Well, because I didn't mean to get you pregnant. 370 00:19:17,755 --> 00:19:19,689 - It was an accident. - You are so pathetic. 371 00:19:19,757 --> 00:19:23,625 You can't have this kid. I'm way too young, and I have a little bit of an alcohol problem... 372 00:19:23,694 --> 00:19:25,594 - Save it! I'm not pregnant! - What? 373 00:19:25,663 --> 00:19:28,131 I'm not pregnant. It was a test. 374 00:19:28,199 --> 00:19:30,895 I just thought for, like, one second that you might be the one. 375 00:19:30,968 --> 00:19:32,833 I just had to know for sure. 376 00:19:32,903 --> 00:19:34,837 Wait a second! So you're not pregnant? 377 00:19:34,905 --> 00:19:37,135 - No. - And this was a test? 378 00:19:37,208 --> 00:19:40,371 - Yeah. - And I failed? 379 00:19:40,444 --> 00:19:42,639 Have a nice life, asshole. 380 00:19:42,713 --> 00:19:44,908 No! Wait... Wait... Wait a second! Wait! Oh. 381 00:19:48,586 --> 00:19:51,077 Son of a bitch! Son of a bitch! 382 00:19:51,155 --> 00:19:54,716 - Where the hell have you been? You said 11:30, dude! - I don't wanna talk about it. 383 00:19:54,792 --> 00:19:58,023 That waitress is picking me up any minute! I was ready to shut down the bar! 384 00:19:58,095 --> 00:20:01,258 - What is that kid doin' here? - I'm taking him to the Big Brother-Big Sister thing. 385 00:20:01,332 --> 00:20:04,597 - Get him out of here, Charlie. - I'm getting picked up any minute! Will you relax? 386 00:20:04,668 --> 00:20:08,104 - I told you, I don't want kids in the bar! - Dude, what is up your ass? 387 00:20:08,172 --> 00:20:12,404 - You... You are out! Whoa, dude! This kid reeks of booze! 388 00:20:12,476 --> 00:20:15,138 No, no, no, no, no. Are you drunk? Don't be drunk. 389 00:20:15,212 --> 00:20:17,146 - Yeah. - How could you let this happen? 390 00:20:17,214 --> 00:20:20,411 I was the only one bartending! He must have been takin' sips out of people's beers. 391 00:20:20,484 --> 00:20:22,577 - All right. Brew some coffee. - You can't give him coffee! 392 00:20:22,653 --> 00:20:26,350 - Let go of that! Let go of that! - Get him out of here, Charlie! 393 00:20:26,423 --> 00:20:28,584 Charlie! 394 00:20:29,693 --> 00:20:31,627 Okay, here we go! 395 00:20:31,695 --> 00:20:33,629 Fresh air! Have a seat! Sit down! Fresh air! 396 00:20:33,697 --> 00:20:36,188 - You suck! - You suck, all right? Breathe it in. Fresh air now. 397 00:20:36,267 --> 00:20:38,735 - You suck and you have an ugly face! - You suck! 398 00:20:38,803 --> 00:20:42,034 You have an ugly face, okay? You try and push people's buttons all the time! 399 00:20:42,106 --> 00:20:44,506 And you get in their head, and you drive them crazy! 400 00:20:44,575 --> 00:20:47,806 - Maybe that's why you don't have a dad anymore! - Oh, my God! 401 00:20:47,878 --> 00:20:50,244 - What are you doing? - I'm drunk. 402 00:20:50,314 --> 00:20:52,373 - He's drunk? - He's not drunk. 403 00:20:52,449 --> 00:20:53,916 - I am drunk! - You're not drunk. 404 00:20:53,984 --> 00:20:56,077 - He sounds drunk. - I am drunk! 405 00:20:56,153 --> 00:20:58,883 You're not drunk! Stop saying that! 406 00:20:58,956 --> 00:21:00,981 He's fine. 407 00:21:10,234 --> 00:21:13,226 - Jimmy Doyle! - Yeah? 408 00:21:13,304 --> 00:21:15,966 - Charlie Kelly. - Yeah? 409 00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:19,134 - From high school. - Oh, yeah. 410 00:21:19,210 --> 00:21:21,940 I didn't recognize you without all your acne. 411 00:21:22,012 --> 00:21:23,912 Yeah. 412 00:21:23,981 --> 00:21:27,348 - All right, listen, I need to talk to you about your kid. - Why? 413 00:21:27,418 --> 00:21:30,910 - Uh, let's see. Because your kid has serious emotional problems. - Why? 414 00:21:30,988 --> 00:21:33,479 - I don't know. Maybe because you're not there as a father. - Why? 415 00:21:33,557 --> 00:21:35,684 - You're kidding me? This your little game? - Why? 416 00:21:35,759 --> 00:21:39,251 - This is what you're doin'? This is what you're doin' to me? - Why? 417 00:21:39,330 --> 00:21:41,264 Why? 418 00:21:42,305 --> 00:21:48,892 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org