1
00:00:03,087 --> 00:00:06,089
(SlNGlNG) The Simpsons

2
00:00:06,423 --> 00:00:07,423
(TlRES SCREECHlNG)

3
00:00:09,218 --> 00:00:10,259
D'oh !

4
00:00:10,678 --> 00:00:12,553
(SCREAMlNG)
(TlRES SCREECHlNG)

5
00:00:33,951 --> 00:00:35,326
(LAUGHlNG)

6
00:00:40,791 --> 00:00:43,543
Where are your clothes
for the gentleman
who is big and fat?

7
00:00:43,627 --> 00:00:44,585
The basement, sir.

8
00:00:44,670 --> 00:00:45,670
Woo-hoo!

9
00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:48,923
Homer, before you get
anywhere near the escalator,

10
00:00:49,007 --> 00:00:50,550
you've gotta tie those shoes.

11
00:00:50,634 --> 00:00:52,009
Homer!

12
00:00:52,136 --> 00:00:53,177
Ow!

13
00:00:53,262 --> 00:00:57,306
So many shoppers!
Damn this. . . Ow!
Resilient economy!

14
00:00:57,391 --> 00:00:58,474
(SCREAMS lN PAlN)

15
00:00:59,143 --> 00:01:00,143
(SlGHS)

16
00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:01,644
(LlSA GROANS)

17
00:01:01,729 --> 00:01:03,646
This is our
Little Hooker line.

18
00:01:03,731 --> 00:01:05,690
All the girls your
age are wearing it,

19
00:01:05,816 --> 00:01:07,859
except the freakishly
unpopular.

20
00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:10,236
But l'm eight
years old !

21
00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:12,113
So is your look.

22
00:01:12,990 --> 00:01:15,032
Are you aware that
you've exposed your skin

23
00:01:15,117 --> 00:01:17,744
to a whole host of
airborne de-beautifiers?

24
00:01:17,828 --> 00:01:18,786
No.

25
00:01:18,871 --> 00:01:21,873
This dermal magnifier
will show the extent
of the damage.

26
00:01:24,668 --> 00:01:25,668
(GASPS)

27
00:01:26,128 --> 00:01:27,545
(GROWLlNG)

28
00:01:28,839 --> 00:01:29,839
(SCREAMS)

29
00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:31,048
He's eating my beauty!

30
00:01:31,133 --> 00:01:32,175
Mmm-hmm.

31
00:01:32,259 --> 00:01:34,886
Skin mites love
the taste of beauty.

32
00:01:34,970 --> 00:01:36,554
Try this
rejuvenating lotion.

33
00:01:36,638 --> 00:01:39,515
lt contains over
60 ingredients.

34
00:01:39,683 --> 00:01:40,683
Ooh !

35
00:01:44,396 --> 00:01:45,396
(MOANlNG)

36
00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:51,652
l hope he didn't
have children.
Did he have children?

37
00:01:51,737 --> 00:01:52,737
Millions of them !

38
00:01:52,863 --> 00:01:53,863
(GRUMBLES)

39
00:01:54,281 --> 00:01:55,698
(HOMER HUMMlNG)

40
00:01:56,617 --> 00:02:00,620
Sir, other customers need
to use that dressing room.

41
00:02:01,038 --> 00:02:02,538
Dressing room?

42
00:02:02,623 --> 00:02:03,623
Uh-oh.

43
00:02:04,792 --> 00:02:06,542
Edna, we don't
need wedding china.

44
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:09,670
The dishes mother won
on Let's Make a DeaI
are holding up nicely.

45
00:02:09,755 --> 00:02:12,632
Seymour, if we register
for these dishes,

46
00:02:12,716 --> 00:02:15,551
our wedding guests
will buy them for us.

47
00:02:15,761 --> 00:02:17,637
And l suppose
those wedding guests

48
00:02:17,721 --> 00:02:19,514
will also pay for
dishwashing liquid,

49
00:02:19,598 --> 00:02:22,016
heated water
and two-sided sponges?

50
00:02:24,561 --> 00:02:25,561
(SCOFFS)

51
00:02:26,230 --> 00:02:29,732
Silent anger,
the cornerstone of
a successful marriage.

52
00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:31,526
(HUMMlNG)

53
00:02:34,238 --> 00:02:35,780
Cool. Guns.

54
00:02:36,865 --> 00:02:38,407
Die, happy couples.

55
00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:40,076
(lMlTATES GUN FlRlNG)

56
00:02:40,202 --> 00:02:43,871
That's not a toy, son.
lt's a barcode reader.
lt registers wedding gifts.

57
00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:45,164
Bull-honky.

58
00:02:45,249 --> 00:02:47,333
No. Not bull-honky.

59
00:02:47,417 --> 00:02:50,419
A couple uses the gun
to select gifts they want
for their wedding.

60
00:02:51,922 --> 00:02:52,922
BART: Wow.

61
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:55,591
lf you'll excuse me,
l'm going to the employee
lounge to finish my Shasta.

62
00:02:57,886 --> 00:02:58,886
Hmm. . .

63
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,639
"Name of groom,"

64
00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:04,392
Bart Simpson.

65
00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:06,269
"Name of bride,"

66
00:03:06,979 --> 00:03:08,896
Lotta Cooties.

67
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:10,314
(LAUGHlNG MALlClOUSLY)

68
00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:12,149
(BEEPS)

69
00:03:12,276 --> 00:03:13,734
(WHITE WEDDING PLAYING)

70
00:03:13,819 --> 00:03:16,863
It's a nice day
for a white wedding

71
00:03:19,825 --> 00:03:24,287
It's a nice day
to start again

72
00:03:24,872 --> 00:03:26,414
(LAUGHlNG MlSCHlEVOUSLY)

73
00:03:26,999 --> 00:03:28,040
(MUSlC STOPS)

74
00:03:29,668 --> 00:03:32,920
A fake wedding?
That's what
l call chutzpah !

75
00:03:33,005 --> 00:03:36,465
Yeah. l'm gonna
scam this town out of
so many presents.

76
00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:40,052
And what l don't use,
l'm gonna return
for store credit!

77
00:03:40,137 --> 00:03:43,347
(SlNGlNG)
Store credit, store credit,
store credit

78
00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:44,599
(SlGHlNG)

79
00:03:44,683 --> 00:03:46,392
Another employee
family wedding.

80
00:03:46,977 --> 00:03:49,979
What's the traditional
peasant gift in these parts?
A milking cow?

81
00:03:50,272 --> 00:03:53,065
Actually, silverware
is all that's left
on the registry.

82
00:03:53,150 --> 00:03:55,860
l'll see if Lenny
wants to go in on a spoon.

83
00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:08,414
Remember, if anyone asks,
you're my niece
from out of town.

84
00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:10,625
l am your niece,
Uncle Joe.

85
00:04:11,543 --> 00:04:14,503
Good Lord, l'm an abomination !

86
00:04:18,342 --> 00:04:20,134
(LAUGHlNG MlSCHlEVOUSLY)

87
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:23,054
This prank is my
Sgt. Pepper's.

88
00:04:27,726 --> 00:04:32,229
l see neither blushing bride
nor ardent swain !

89
00:04:32,314 --> 00:04:34,065
There is no wedding here!

90
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:35,733
(ALL GRUMBLlNG)

91
00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:37,985
Oh, my God !
We're sealed in !

92
00:04:38,070 --> 00:04:40,363
Nobody breathe my air!
Get your own !

93
00:04:40,530 --> 00:04:41,656
(BREATHlNG HEAVlLY)

94
00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:45,701
Why you selfish little maggot,
l'll suck your lungs dry!

95
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:49,080
Knock it off!

96
00:04:50,082 --> 00:04:51,082
(ALL BREATHlNG HEAVlLY)

97
00:04:51,458 --> 00:04:52,708
MAN: Okay. . .

98
00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:02,343
(ALL FAlNTlNG)

99
00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:06,555
Yes! (CHUCKLES)

100
00:05:08,558 --> 00:05:12,603
So, you thought you'd
pull a fake wedding, eh?
You're under arrest.

101
00:05:12,896 --> 00:05:14,855
Come on, Chief.
lt was just a prank.

102
00:05:15,065 --> 00:05:16,983
Would some flatware
make things right?

103
00:05:17,234 --> 00:05:19,443
Um, what does it say
on my badge?

104
00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:21,570
(READlNG)

105
00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:23,698
Let's go.

106
00:05:23,907 --> 00:05:25,074
(BART SlGHS)

107
00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:27,952
Bart, the record
of your mischief
is staggering.

108
00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:29,620
Just look at this file.

109
00:05:29,913 --> 00:05:31,288
That doesn't
look so big.

110
00:05:31,581 --> 00:05:33,457
These are directions
to the facility

111
00:05:33,542 --> 00:05:37,670
where Bart's criminal record
occupies three full
storage lockers.

112
00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:39,839
Six feet by eight?

113
00:05:40,257 --> 00:05:41,924
Six by 1 4!

114
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:43,217
(ALL GASP)

115
00:05:43,635 --> 00:05:47,179
Bart Simpson,
l hereby sentence
you to six months

116
00:05:47,264 --> 00:05:50,266
at the Springfield Juvenile
Correctional Facility.

117
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:54,270
Juvie? Please, Judge.
You can't! l'll do anything.

118
00:05:54,604 --> 00:05:57,106
l'll squeal on my dad.
He's been up to bad things.

119
00:05:57,190 --> 00:05:58,441
Crap you've never
even thought of.

120
00:05:58,775 --> 00:06:02,236
We've already got
an informer working
deep cover on your dad.

121
00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:04,155
One he'll never suspect.

122
00:06:04,448 --> 00:06:06,323
ls it Lenny?
Damn it!

123
00:06:06,408 --> 00:06:07,908
l mean, no.

124
00:06:10,245 --> 00:06:11,495
(GRUNTS)

125
00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:14,373
Now, take that kid away.

126
00:06:15,876 --> 00:06:19,003
No! You're not gonna
take my baby to jail !

127
00:06:19,755 --> 00:06:20,755
(STRUGGLlNG)

128
00:06:21,298 --> 00:06:22,965
All right, boys.
She's not letting go.

129
00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:24,300
Make the switch.

130
00:06:25,135 --> 00:06:26,135
(RALPH HUMMlNG)

131
00:06:27,512 --> 00:06:28,804
(MARGE SOBBlNG)

132
00:06:33,185 --> 00:06:35,603
Your eyes need diapers.

133
00:06:35,687 --> 00:06:37,688
Your eyes need. . .
That's good, Ralphie.

134
00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:52,328
One slingshot,
one pack of cards,
baseball, one doodle.

135
00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:53,454
(READlNG)

136
00:06:54,831 --> 00:06:56,582
One harmonica.

137
00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:59,627
Perfect mood setter
for the end of your freedom.

138
00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,129
(PLAYS HARMONlCA)

139
00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:09,678
Lessons by mail, worthwhile.

140
00:07:10,388 --> 00:07:11,847
(SOBBlNG)

141
00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:15,142
My baby boy is in jail.

142
00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:18,813
l'm the worst
mom in the world.

143
00:07:19,523 --> 00:07:21,565
lt's not all your fault.

144
00:07:21,650 --> 00:07:25,236
All these years,
l watched you turn our
son into a time bomb,

145
00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:27,404
and yet l did nothing.

146
00:07:27,531 --> 00:07:31,450
So in a way,
l too am a victim. . .
Of you.

147
00:07:33,370 --> 00:07:34,787
You're a great mom.

148
00:07:34,871 --> 00:07:37,540
You were always there
for Bart with love
and support.

149
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:42,753
His acting out
was probably caused
by negative reinforcement.

150
00:07:42,838 --> 00:07:45,714
Oh, l get it.
Blame the strangler!

151
00:07:45,924 --> 00:07:46,924
(SCOFFlNG)

152
00:07:50,095 --> 00:07:51,095
(SCOFFS)

153
00:07:52,222 --> 00:07:53,806
Just because you've
done time at juvie,

154
00:07:53,890 --> 00:07:55,808
doesn't mean the world
has given up on you.

155
00:07:56,226 --> 00:07:57,852
See for yourself
the exciting careers

156
00:07:57,936 --> 00:07:59,562
that wait for you
upon your release.

157
00:08:00,063 --> 00:08:01,480
(ALL GASP)

158
00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:04,775
These are all fast food jobs.

159
00:08:05,277 --> 00:08:08,320
Ex-cons are a godsend
to employers like me.

160
00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:10,156
lf you ask for a raise,

161
00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:14,201
l just call your
parole officer,
and back in the can you go!

162
00:08:14,286 --> 00:08:15,911
(LAUGHlNG)

163
00:08:20,750 --> 00:08:23,043
(THE lTCHY & SCRATCHY SHOW
THEME PLAYlNG)

164
00:08:23,879 --> 00:08:25,337
ALL: Yay!

165
00:08:25,547 --> 00:08:30,259
(SlGHS) Cartoons.
America's only
native art form.

166
00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:31,760
l don't count jazz
'cause it sucks.

167
00:08:38,435 --> 00:08:40,227
Freedom !

168
00:08:40,312 --> 00:08:43,731
Bloodshed !

169
00:08:54,409 --> 00:08:59,955
l declare an end
to the spectacular
3-D blood and gore!

170
00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:01,957
ALL: Yay!

171
00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:10,841
They cut all
the good parts!

172
00:09:10,926 --> 00:09:12,885
l've lost
everything l loved.

173
00:09:15,013 --> 00:09:16,222
(GRUNTlNG)

174
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:22,394
Okay. lf l use my head,
l can keep out of trouble.

175
00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:24,855
l better stay
out of the sandbox.
l could be buried alive.

176
00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:27,608
Maybe the slide.

177
00:09:32,155 --> 00:09:34,240
Don't forget to
buy your photos!

178
00:09:37,327 --> 00:09:41,163
l'll just hang out
next to the girls' juvie.
Hello, ladies.

179
00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:47,962
l'm Gina.
You touch my fence again,

180
00:09:48,046 --> 00:09:50,047
and your puberty's
gonna be very boring.

181
00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:52,424
(GRUNTS)

182
00:09:53,802 --> 00:09:55,177
(ALL LAUGHlNG)

183
00:09:55,887 --> 00:09:57,888
God, l hate this place.

184
00:09:58,515 --> 00:10:00,182
lt's nothing like
the brochure.

185
00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:05,521
lt's horrible in here.
The boys beat me up.
The girls beat me up.

186
00:10:05,689 --> 00:10:08,899
Now, sweetie,
you shouldn't hang around
with people who beat you.

187
00:10:08,984 --> 00:10:10,943
They're not true friends.

188
00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:12,361
Time's up!

189
00:10:14,239 --> 00:10:17,324
My poor boy is
miserable in here.

190
00:10:17,409 --> 00:10:19,702
There has to be something
l can do to help him.

191
00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:22,371
Oh. . .

192
00:10:22,539 --> 00:10:26,041
lnteresting.
Marge, what does
that sign say?

193
00:10:26,918 --> 00:10:29,586
So, why do you want
to be a guard here?

194
00:10:29,879 --> 00:10:32,589
l believe that
children are the future.

195
00:10:33,008 --> 00:10:35,175
Unless we stop them now!

196
00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:36,969
Welcome aboard.

197
00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:39,888
This end's for beatin'.
This end's for holdin'.

198
00:10:40,098 --> 00:10:41,849
Ah. When does
training start?

199
00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:43,267
lt just finished.

200
00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:44,727
BOY: Catch !

201
00:10:45,937 --> 00:10:46,937
Jump!

202
00:10:47,063 --> 00:10:48,147
BART: That's my doll !

203
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:49,440
(GRUNTS)

204
00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:52,318
Keep away! Keep away!

205
00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:54,278
HOMER: Put that sissy down !

206
00:10:54,571 --> 00:10:56,238
lf you're gonna
pick on someone,

207
00:10:56,323 --> 00:11:00,242
why don't you pick on
someone much bigger
than you with a gun?

208
00:11:00,744 --> 00:11:02,619
Dad?
That's right.

209
00:11:02,704 --> 00:11:05,998
l got a job here,
so l can watch over you
like a mother hen.

210
00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:07,374
His dad's a screw!

211
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:10,294
l sure am.
Here you go, Son.

212
00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:13,255
l brought you a lollipop
from the guards' lounge.

213
00:11:14,132 --> 00:11:16,342
Not so tough now, huh?

214
00:11:16,426 --> 00:11:17,426
HOMER: Yeah.

215
00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:18,719
(BUZZlNG)

216
00:11:18,803 --> 00:11:21,555
Well, that's the end
of my shift. See you Monday.

217
00:11:21,848 --> 00:11:23,432
Wait. Monday's
Martin Luther King Day.

218
00:11:23,558 --> 00:11:25,100
Well, l'll see you
when l see you.

219
00:11:26,269 --> 00:11:27,561
Love you !

220
00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:29,521
(LAUGHlNG NERVOUSLY)

221
00:11:30,231 --> 00:11:33,609
This lollipop's
really for everybody.

222
00:11:35,612 --> 00:11:39,365
Studies show the part
of the brain that
remembers dance steps

223
00:11:39,491 --> 00:11:41,867
is also the anger center.

224
00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:45,120
So juveniles who
know how to fox-trot

225
00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:49,458
are 1 0% less likely
to commit a double homicide.

226
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:51,627
Who conducted this study?

227
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:54,713
The institute of
shut-your-fat-face!

228
00:11:55,256 --> 00:11:56,423
Now, pair up.

229
00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:00,427
He's mine.
Him?

230
00:12:00,804 --> 00:12:02,054
Why?

231
00:12:02,138 --> 00:12:03,347
l like 'em small
and bug-eyed.

232
00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:09,061
You two will dance,
and you'll like it.

233
00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:11,814
Then you'll have punch,
and you'll drink it.

234
00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:15,734
Then your eyes will meet,
and it will be awkward.

235
00:12:15,819 --> 00:12:17,694
So help me, God !

236
00:12:18,154 --> 00:12:19,154
(COCKS GUN)

237
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:20,406
(SLOW MUSlC PLAYlNG)

238
00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:22,366
Okay, here's my rules.

239
00:12:22,659 --> 00:12:25,244
Hands at 1 0 and two,
no eye contact

240
00:12:25,328 --> 00:12:27,913
and l don't want to
hear how pretty l look.

241
00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:29,957
Don't worry.
You won't. D'oh !

242
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:32,167
(GRUNTlNG)

243
00:12:48,893 --> 00:12:50,561
We're gettin' outta here.

244
00:12:52,522 --> 00:12:53,522
Whoa!

245
00:12:54,941 --> 00:12:55,941
(ALL GASP)

246
00:12:56,359 --> 00:12:59,194
They're escaping !
Seal the perimeter!

247
00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:02,322
l'm on it!

248
00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:09,413
Can't you go any faster?

249
00:13:09,497 --> 00:13:14,585
l can close it faster
or l can close it right.

250
00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:15,836
Can't you do both?

251
00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:17,045
Talk to the union.

252
00:13:17,338 --> 00:13:19,131
(SlREN BLARlNG)

253
00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:22,676
l'm getting out in two weeks.
Why would l want to
break out with you?

254
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:27,347
(SWOONlNG)
Well, you do look
pretty in the moonlight.

255
00:13:27,599 --> 00:13:28,599
(GRUNTS)

256
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:31,935
(DOGS BARKlNG)

257
00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:33,896
Hey, guard !

258
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:35,814
Help! Help!

259
00:13:36,691 --> 00:13:37,691
(MUMBLlNG)

260
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,319
Guess where
the next one's going.

261
00:13:40,570 --> 00:13:41,737
Up my butt?

262
00:13:51,414 --> 00:13:54,666
Why did you kiss me?
Are you looking
to do the Bartman?

263
00:13:54,918 --> 00:13:57,503
Hey, l'm only sticking
with you till l get
these chains off.

264
00:13:57,587 --> 00:14:00,339
And if we get caught,
l'm telling them
this was your idea.

265
00:14:00,423 --> 00:14:01,924
Yeah. Why would
they believe you?

266
00:14:02,091 --> 00:14:03,967
Because l can do this.

267
00:14:04,052 --> 00:14:05,427
(SOBBlNG)

268
00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:07,638
That mean boy,

269
00:14:08,598 --> 00:14:11,058
he dragged me
out of the dance.

270
00:14:11,476 --> 00:14:15,687
l didn't want to go,
but he was too strong !

271
00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:17,564
But you got 20 pounds on me.

272
00:14:17,732 --> 00:14:20,567
And then, he said l was fat!

273
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:23,320
Oh, l am screwed.

274
00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:25,489
You bet you are.

275
00:14:25,573 --> 00:14:28,200
Now as long as we're together,
l expect you to be a man.

276
00:14:28,326 --> 00:14:29,952
But l have
to wizzle.
Fine.

277
00:14:30,036 --> 00:14:32,412
(GRUNTS)
l miss prison.

278
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:37,209
I am not chipping
in on a birthday cake
for that jackass, Arnie Pye.

279
00:14:37,293 --> 00:14:38,460
Let him eat...

280
00:14:38,545 --> 00:14:42,005
This is Kent Brockman
live at Springfield
Juvenile Hall,

281
00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:43,840
the scene of
a daring escape

282
00:14:43,925 --> 00:14:46,218
by inmates Bart Simpson
and Gina Vendetti.

283
00:14:46,302 --> 00:14:47,344
(ALL GASP)

284
00:14:47,428 --> 00:14:51,557
To understand
the mind-set of the escapees,
we've brought in an expert,

285
00:14:51,641 --> 00:14:54,184
former under-aged
offender, Snake.

286
00:14:54,269 --> 00:14:57,729
If they're smart, Kent,
they'II stay off
the main roads.

287
00:14:57,814 --> 00:14:59,439
It's aII here in my book,

288
00:14:59,524 --> 00:15:02,776
Ten Habits of
Highly Successful Criminals.

289
00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:06,071
AII right,
I pIugged your book.
Now, put down the gun.

290
00:15:06,155 --> 00:15:08,240
Tell them l'll be
on Conan Thursday

291
00:15:08,366 --> 00:15:10,492
with Heather Locklear
and Third Eye BIind.

292
00:15:10,994 --> 00:15:13,996
Why would Bart escape
if he's gonna be
released in two weeks?

293
00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:17,207
You just don't
understand boys.

294
00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:19,167
He's stupid !

295
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:22,045
But he won't know
where to go
or what to eat!

296
00:15:22,213 --> 00:15:24,840
Relax. What's the worst
that could happen?

297
00:15:26,634 --> 00:15:29,928
You shall marry my daughter,
Moonhilda.

298
00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:33,682
l can't wait to lay
my eggs in his brain.

299
00:15:34,684 --> 00:15:38,770
No son of mine will be
marched down the aisle
at the barrel of a ray gun !

300
00:15:38,855 --> 00:15:40,606
Let's go!
(DOOR SLAMS)

301
00:15:42,525 --> 00:15:44,192
So why'd they
send you to juvie?

302
00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:46,028
Shoplift a scrunchie?
Get bent.

303
00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:48,864
l pushed Snow White
over the parapet
at Disneyland.

304
00:15:49,991 --> 00:15:51,033
BART: Oh, man.

305
00:15:51,659 --> 00:15:53,410
Did she live?
Yeah.

306
00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:54,703
But it's not a good life.

307
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:58,415
Gina, before we get
any closer,

308
00:15:58,499 --> 00:16:00,792
there's something
you need to know about me.

309
00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:02,711
l think girls
are icky pants.

310
00:16:03,046 --> 00:16:05,047
lt took a lot of
courage to say that.

311
00:16:05,173 --> 00:16:07,174
Courage l'm gonna
pinch outta you.

312
00:16:08,009 --> 00:16:09,009
(GlGGLlNG)

313
00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:15,140
Say, Cletus,
have you seen a couple
of kids go by?

314
00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:19,269
l don't have such
a good memory since
l drank my thermometer.

315
00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:22,147
But l whittles what l sees.

316
00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:23,774
(BANJO MUSlC PLAYlNG)

317
00:16:25,068 --> 00:16:26,068
ls this them?

318
00:16:26,402 --> 00:16:28,695
lt sure is.
We're on the right track.

319
00:16:29,238 --> 00:16:30,656
What are you making now?

320
00:16:30,740 --> 00:16:33,575
Oh, sometimes
l whittles the future.

321
00:16:37,538 --> 00:16:38,538
Hmm. . .

322
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:41,667
Great. l can get
these handcuffs off before

323
00:16:41,751 --> 00:16:43,627
l get a full-blown
case of the cooties.

324
00:16:43,795 --> 00:16:45,629
Bart, l can't believe
you don't know this,

325
00:16:45,713 --> 00:16:47,673
but there's no
such thing as cooties,

326
00:16:47,757 --> 00:16:51,551
cootie shots,
cootie force fields
or cootie insurance.

327
00:16:51,636 --> 00:16:53,929
But State Farm
took my money.

328
00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:56,348
When we split up,
where are you gonna go?

329
00:16:56,432 --> 00:16:58,684
Don't worry.
My family will hide me
until the heat's off.

330
00:16:58,893 --> 00:17:00,477
Wow. Your parents are cool.

331
00:17:04,232 --> 00:17:05,941
Oh, man.
There's a line.

332
00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:11,780
You keep your ink
hole shut about this.

333
00:17:31,634 --> 00:17:33,427
We're free! We're free!

334
00:17:34,011 --> 00:17:36,388
Bart, l'm gonna
miss you so much.

335
00:17:36,472 --> 00:17:39,182
Hey, the next time
my mom asks me to help
around the house,

336
00:17:39,267 --> 00:17:41,101
l could come live
with your family.

337
00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:42,477
(GRUNTS)

338
00:17:42,562 --> 00:17:44,563
Don't get fresh
with me, jerk!

339
00:17:47,650 --> 00:17:51,486
Take it from a blacksmith,
that girl's trouble.

340
00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:55,907
That girl's nuts.
First she likes me,
then she hates me.

341
00:17:55,992 --> 00:17:58,243
l've already forgotten
how ugly she is.

342
00:17:58,327 --> 00:18:00,537
l'd better eyeball
that ape one more time.

343
00:18:03,332 --> 00:18:04,666
(SCREAMlNG lN PAlN)

344
00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:06,376
(GASPS)

345
00:18:06,461 --> 00:18:07,544
CLANCY: God !

346
00:18:07,628 --> 00:18:08,628
(SOBBlNG)

347
00:18:09,547 --> 00:18:11,089
What's up?
Don't you want to get back

348
00:18:11,174 --> 00:18:12,632
to that awesome
family of yours?

349
00:18:14,677 --> 00:18:16,595
What are you crying about?

350
00:18:16,971 --> 00:18:18,096
How cool they are?

351
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:24,686
Oh. l know
you're sad now.

352
00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:28,064
But surely your
incredible family
will cheer you up.

353
00:18:28,149 --> 00:18:29,608
(CONTlNUES SOBBlNG)

354
00:18:31,402 --> 00:18:34,613
Wait. Do you even
have a family?

355
00:18:34,822 --> 00:18:38,700
No, l don't!
They're imaginary,
like your brain !

356
00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:40,869
l understand.

357
00:18:40,995 --> 00:18:43,038
You don't
understand anything !

358
00:18:43,539 --> 00:18:44,998
(GRUNTlNG)

359
00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:47,876
You're such a psycho!

360
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:49,419
Mama's boy!

361
00:18:50,004 --> 00:18:51,046
Future skank!

362
00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:52,297
Family guy!

363
00:18:53,257 --> 00:18:56,968
Well, well, well,
if it isn't Punch 'n' Juvie.

364
00:18:58,012 --> 00:18:59,596
Plant the evidence
on 'em, boys.

365
00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:01,223
Chief, we don't have to.

366
00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:02,557
These ones are
actually guilty.

367
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:03,642
Super.

368
00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:05,310
Makes our job
that much easier.

369
00:19:08,022 --> 00:19:11,691
Oh, Bart, my troubled
little lamb.

370
00:19:11,776 --> 00:19:14,486
You'll be in jail
for so long.

371
00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:18,490
But l'll keep your room
just the way it was,
a pigsty.

372
00:19:18,825 --> 00:19:21,827
Son, l want you to know
no matter what anyone says,

373
00:19:21,911 --> 00:19:24,579
there's no shame
in being caught alive.

374
00:19:24,914 --> 00:19:28,166
Take a good long look
at the innocent love
in your son's eyes.

375
00:19:28,251 --> 00:19:31,378
Because when he
gets out of prison,
it'll be gone forever.

376
00:19:32,046 --> 00:19:33,839
He will have
a great bod though.

377
00:19:33,923 --> 00:19:36,925
And a couple of
those teardrop tattoos.
Those are cool.

378
00:19:38,427 --> 00:19:40,095
There's something l
have to tell you guys.

379
00:19:40,263 --> 00:19:42,889
Now, look, my fly
is down because
it's broken, okay?

380
00:19:42,974 --> 00:19:45,100
No. lt's something else.

381
00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:50,355
Bart, she took all
the responsibility
for the escape.

382
00:19:50,439 --> 00:19:51,481
You're free to go.

383
00:19:51,774 --> 00:19:53,233
But the kid's still got time
on his sentence, Chief.

384
00:19:53,651 --> 00:19:56,194
Look, if you all
want to squeeze into
the backseat, fine.

385
00:19:56,279 --> 00:19:57,529
With my box kite.

386
00:19:57,613 --> 00:19:58,822
Oh, forget it.

387
00:20:11,419 --> 00:20:14,546
Welcome back, Gina.
l got a few new
cellmates for you.

388
00:20:14,881 --> 00:20:16,381
That's cool.

389
00:20:16,465 --> 00:20:19,050
l wouldn't feel right
going to the bathroom
with no one watching.

390
00:20:21,262 --> 00:20:22,262
(GASPS)

391
00:20:23,681 --> 00:20:27,267
l thought you might want
to have a nice family dinner.

392
00:20:27,977 --> 00:20:29,978
We're having
"Make Your Own Taco" night.

393
00:20:30,605 --> 00:20:34,733
Gina, thanks for showing us
the meaning of Christmas.

394
00:20:34,817 --> 00:20:38,278
And thanks for showing
my brother that girls
can be cool.

395
00:20:38,362 --> 00:20:39,821
Who is this nerd?

396
00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:41,323
Taco, please.

397
00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:44,659
Well, my shift's over.

398
00:20:44,744 --> 00:20:49,164
l guess it's back to
my bachelor apartment,
make a tuna sandwich,

399
00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:52,959
turn on WiII & Grace
and cry myself to sleep.

400
00:20:54,462 --> 00:20:55,462
(MARGE SlGHS)

401
00:20:55,546 --> 00:20:57,339
Would you like to join us?

402
00:20:57,506 --> 00:20:59,674
Didn't you hear me?
l've got an evening planned !

403
00:21:54,397 --> 00:21:55,397
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