1
00:00:05,265 --> 00:00:06,464
<i>Sorry, Nigel.</i>

2
00:00:06,465 --> 00:00:08,250
Dinner took longer
than I thought.

3
00:00:11,821 --> 00:00:15,423
And now we are stuck in traffic.

4
00:00:15,425 --> 00:00:17,392
Yeah, bumper to bumper.

5
00:00:17,394 --> 00:00:20,395
Well, tell Ava I'll be there
in an hour, okay?

6
00:00:20,397 --> 00:00:21,813
Okay.

7
00:00:23,232 --> 00:00:25,066
Why didn't you
just tell him the truth?

8
00:00:25,068 --> 00:00:27,635
Because I know
my ex-husband quite well,

9
00:00:27,637 --> 00:00:30,305
and it would really upset him
if he found out

10
00:00:30,307 --> 00:00:32,824
you flew me to San Francisco
in your private jet

11
00:00:32,826 --> 00:00:35,277
just to have fried clams.

12
00:00:35,279 --> 00:00:36,328
Yeah, you're right.

13
00:00:36,330 --> 00:00:37,412
You shouldn't tell him.

14
00:00:37,414 --> 00:00:38,113
Thank you.

15
00:00:38,115 --> 00:00:38,947
I'll tell him.

16
00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:41,416
I just wanted to do
something nice for you

17
00:00:41,418 --> 00:00:42,483
before you went to London.

18
00:00:42,485 --> 00:00:44,452
I'll only be gone a few weeks.

19
00:00:44,454 --> 00:00:46,654
And I...

20
00:00:46,656 --> 00:00:48,506
will miss you.

21
00:00:48,508 --> 00:00:51,459
And I will miss you.

22
00:00:52,429 --> 00:00:53,595
Whoa.
What was that?

23
00:00:54,765 --> 00:00:56,615
Don't worry, it's normal.

24
00:00:59,553 --> 00:01:01,102
Ahh! That's not normal!

25
00:01:01,104 --> 00:01:02,670
God, oh, God, oh, God!

26
00:01:02,672 --> 00:01:04,522
Zoey, I love you.

27
00:01:04,524 --> 00:01:05,941
I don't want to die.

28
00:01:05,943 --> 00:01:07,642
Did you hear me?
I said I love you.

29
00:01:07,644 --> 00:01:10,312
I heard you,
and I said I don't want to die.

30
00:01:21,290 --> 00:01:23,742
Sorry about that, Mr. Schmidt.

31
00:01:23,744 --> 00:01:25,460
Just some clear air turbulence.

32
00:01:25,462 --> 00:01:27,695
Should be smooth sailing
from here on out.

33
00:01:27,697 --> 00:01:30,265
I doubt that.

34
00:01:31,834 --> 00:01:34,636
♪ Men, men, men, men, manly men,
men, men ♪

35
00:01:34,638 --> 00:01:37,872
♪ Men, men, men, manly men, men, men ♪
♪ Ooh

36
00:01:37,874 --> 00:01:41,042
♪ Men, men, men, men, manly men ♪
♪ Ooh

37
00:01:41,044 --> 00:01:43,178
♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh,
ooh-ohh, ooh-ooh... ♪

38
00:01:43,180 --> 00:01:45,680
♪ Men, men, men, men, manly men,
men, men ♪

39
00:01:45,682 --> 00:01:48,716
♪ Ooh
♪ Men, men, men, manly men, men, men ♪

40
00:01:48,718 --> 00:01:53,738
♪ Ah.
♪ Men.

41
00:02:00,795 --> 00:02:02,263
♪ Men

42
00:02:02,265 --> 00:02:03,838
Aw...

43
00:02:03,839 --> 00:02:07,057
What's sadder than
an empty bottle of wine?

44
00:02:07,059 --> 00:02:11,261
Being the boyfriend of
a 40-year-old drunk soccer mom.

45
00:02:11,263 --> 00:02:12,596
What?

46
00:02:12,598 --> 00:02:13,814
Oh, I was just thinking

47
00:02:13,816 --> 00:02:15,399
you might want
to slow down a little.

48
00:02:15,401 --> 00:02:17,884
It's only wine, geez.

49
00:02:17,886 --> 00:02:20,821
It's only been wine
since last July.

50
00:02:20,823 --> 00:02:22,773
Hey, hey, that got
a three-star rating

51
00:02:22,775 --> 00:02:24,391
in the Wal-Mart wine tracker.

52
00:02:24,393 --> 00:02:26,310
What's the big deal?

53
00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:28,445
So, I need a few glasses
to loosen me up.

54
00:02:28,447 --> 00:02:29,830
Are you saying you
need to get loaded

55
00:02:29,832 --> 00:02:30,914
in order to have sex with me?

56
00:02:30,916 --> 00:02:33,283
I'm not loaded.
Fine.

57
00:02:33,285 --> 00:02:35,352
But it doesn't hurt.

58
00:02:36,454 --> 00:02:38,121
Hey, guys.

59
00:02:38,123 --> 00:02:40,073
Wally! Want some wine?

60
00:02:40,075 --> 00:02:42,459
No, I don't like to drink
when I'm depressed.

61
00:02:42,461 --> 00:02:44,261
Wally, it's the best time
to drink.

62
00:02:44,263 --> 00:02:47,264
Also when you're bored, lonely,
or just, you know,

63
00:02:47,266 --> 00:02:48,565
too sober.

64
00:02:49,417 --> 00:02:50,884
Why are you depressed?

65
00:02:50,886 --> 00:02:52,135
I don't know.

66
00:02:52,137 --> 00:02:53,470
It's kind of personal.

67
00:02:53,472 --> 00:02:55,689
Okay, no problem.

68
00:02:57,058 --> 00:02:58,275
What do you do when you

69
00:02:58,277 --> 00:03:00,193
tell someone you love them
and they don't respond?

70
00:03:00,195 --> 00:03:02,946
Drink.

71
00:03:02,948 --> 00:03:04,898
Wait, you told Zoey
you love her?

72
00:03:04,900 --> 00:03:06,483
Yeah, I thought the plane
was gonna crash,

73
00:03:06,485 --> 00:03:07,818
and it just kind of came out,

74
00:03:07,820 --> 00:03:10,671
along with a little squirt
of pee.

75
00:03:11,489 --> 00:03:13,540
So, what did she say?

76
00:03:13,542 --> 00:03:17,944
"Oh, God,
oh, God, I don't want to die."

77
00:03:17,946 --> 00:03:20,964
Well, given the circumstance,
that's a legitimate response.

78
00:03:20,966 --> 00:03:22,082
Sure, in the moment,

79
00:03:22,084 --> 00:03:23,634
but what about
after the plane leveled out?

80
00:03:23,636 --> 00:03:24,584
Well, what did she say then?

81
00:03:24,586 --> 00:03:27,421
"Why do I smell pee?"

82
00:03:30,558 --> 00:03:32,426
Then we just sat there
in silence

83
00:03:32,428 --> 00:03:34,094
for the rest of the flight.

84
00:03:34,096 --> 00:03:36,113
Should have drank.

85
00:03:37,965 --> 00:03:40,767
Yeah, well, I'm gonna go
change my underwear

86
00:03:40,769 --> 00:03:42,185
before I get diaper rash.

87
00:03:43,971 --> 00:03:46,323
Wow, I feel bad for him.

88
00:03:46,325 --> 00:03:47,741
Yeah.

89
00:03:47,743 --> 00:03:49,809
I mean, you know, to tell
somebody you love them,

90
00:03:49,811 --> 00:03:52,079
and just get no response.

91
00:03:52,081 --> 00:03:54,097
Awful.

92
00:03:57,151 --> 00:03:58,852
You know how I feel
about you, right?

93
00:03:58,854 --> 00:03:59,986
Right.

94
00:03:59,988 --> 00:04:01,705
You know how I
feel about you.

95
00:04:01,707 --> 00:04:04,708
Oh, absolutely.

96
00:04:07,962 --> 00:04:10,030
Still nice to hear
on occasion.

97
00:04:10,032 --> 00:04:12,182
Oh, I agree.

98
00:04:15,153 --> 00:04:19,272
I can do this
as long as you can, pal.

99
00:04:24,396 --> 00:04:25,729
It's open.

100
00:04:25,731 --> 00:04:27,447
Hey.

101
00:04:27,449 --> 00:04:28,782
Can I talk to you for a minute?

102
00:04:28,784 --> 00:04:30,067
Sure. What's up?

103
00:04:31,686 --> 00:04:33,870
I didn't sleep at all
last night, man.

104
00:04:33,872 --> 00:04:35,856
This Zoey stuff
is making me crazy.

105
00:04:35,858 --> 00:04:37,357
Oh, man, I'm sorry.

106
00:04:37,359 --> 00:04:39,793
I'm starting to wonder

107
00:04:39,795 --> 00:04:42,379
if I should break
up with her,

108
00:04:42,381 --> 00:04:44,364
Oh, hang on. I mean,
just because she didn't say,

109
00:04:44,366 --> 00:04:46,299
"I love you," doesn't mean
she doesn't feel it.

110
00:04:46,301 --> 00:04:47,634
You think?

111
00:04:47,636 --> 00:04:49,536
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Some people have a hard time

112
00:04:49,538 --> 00:04:50,504
articulating their feelings,

113
00:04:50,506 --> 00:04:52,756
so they express them
in other ways.

114
00:04:57,128 --> 00:04:58,044
Is that Lyndsey?

115
00:04:59,181 --> 00:05:01,765
Yeah, she had a little
too much vino last night.

116
00:05:01,767 --> 00:05:04,768
Anyway, I think you just have
to be patient with Zoey.

117
00:05:06,905 --> 00:05:09,222
Yeah, I guess.

118
00:05:13,411 --> 00:05:16,729
Sorry, I... I have a...
a hard time with...

119
00:05:16,731 --> 00:05:18,582
people throwing up.

120
00:05:18,584 --> 00:05:21,251
Try watching
and holding her hair.

121
00:05:21,253 --> 00:05:24,404
It's just, Zoey's going
to England for a few weeks.

122
00:05:27,842 --> 00:05:29,426
And-and I'm th...

123
00:05:30,628 --> 00:05:32,763
I'm-I'm starting to
think if...

124
00:05:32,765 --> 00:05:35,582
if I'm gonna end it,
now would be a good time.

125
00:05:35,584 --> 00:05:37,768
Well, it...

126
00:05:40,388 --> 00:05:41,688
Whoa.

127
00:05:41,690 --> 00:05:43,607
You think I'd be
used to it by now.

128
00:05:43,609 --> 00:05:45,258
No, no, no, don't...

129
00:05:45,260 --> 00:05:46,526
Don't do anything hasty.

130
00:05:49,814 --> 00:05:52,816
I can't... I... I can't
just leave th...

131
00:05:52,818 --> 00:05:55,318
I can't just leave things
the way that they are.

132
00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:58,038
Why don't you...
Why don't you go talk to her,

133
00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:01,041
you know, and just put
your caaards on the table.

134
00:06:03,110 --> 00:06:05,045
Yeah, maybe.

135
00:06:05,047 --> 00:06:06,446
Crap,

136
00:06:06,448 --> 00:06:08,482
now I've got to change my bra.

137
00:06:11,586 --> 00:06:14,221
I-I-I mean, maybe we should
just give her some privacy.

138
00:06:14,223 --> 00:06:18,775
Oh, God,
now it's coming out both ends!

139
00:06:18,777 --> 00:06:21,061
Good idea.

140
00:06:25,850 --> 00:06:27,767
Ava, you need
to get dressed.

141
00:06:27,769 --> 00:06:29,936
Mummy has to go.

142
00:06:32,156 --> 00:06:33,523
Walden.

143
00:06:33,525 --> 00:06:34,941
De-e-lightful.

144
00:06:34,943 --> 00:06:38,912
Nigel, di-isgusting.

145
00:06:40,915 --> 00:06:42,482
What, are you here
to pick up your daughter?

146
00:06:42,484 --> 00:06:43,834
I am.

147
00:06:43,836 --> 00:06:46,203
Zoey tell you that we took
my jet to San Francisco

148
00:06:46,205 --> 00:06:48,038
last night for fried clams?

149
00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:50,674
No, she did not.

150
00:06:50,676 --> 00:06:52,926
Well, we did.

151
00:06:52,928 --> 00:06:55,595
Are you sharing this information
just to upset me?

152
00:06:55,597 --> 00:06:59,499
Actually, I was hoping to make
you feel inadequate as well.

153
00:06:59,501 --> 00:07:00,600
Oh, Walden.

154
00:07:00,602 --> 00:07:02,035
What are you
doing here?

155
00:07:02,037 --> 00:07:03,436
Nigel, I'm running late,

156
00:07:03,438 --> 00:07:05,138
so will you for once please
make yourself useful

157
00:07:05,140 --> 00:07:06,356
and help Ava get ready?

158
00:07:06,358 --> 00:07:09,359
Well, only because
you asked so nicely.

159
00:07:09,361 --> 00:07:10,694
Enjoy her.

160
00:07:10,696 --> 00:07:11,978
Hi.

161
00:07:11,980 --> 00:07:13,029
We need to talk.

162
00:07:13,031 --> 00:07:15,115
Now? I'm about to leave
for the airport.

163
00:07:15,117 --> 00:07:16,149
I'll take you.

164
00:07:16,151 --> 00:07:17,951
Thanks, but I have a car coming.

165
00:07:17,953 --> 00:07:19,202
Now, where is my passport?

166
00:07:19,204 --> 00:07:20,787
Nigel, have you
seen my passport?

167
00:07:20,789 --> 00:07:22,072
I don't live
here, Zoey,

168
00:07:22,074 --> 00:07:24,040
I merely
pay the rent.

169
00:07:24,042 --> 00:07:26,126
Look, I just don't want
to leave things between us

170
00:07:26,128 --> 00:07:27,210
the way that they are.

171
00:07:27,212 --> 00:07:28,161
Everything's fine.

172
00:07:28,163 --> 00:07:29,379
No, it's not.

173
00:07:29,381 --> 00:07:30,863
I said I love you,
and the only thing

174
00:07:30,865 --> 00:07:33,750
I got in response is the not
very surprising information

175
00:07:33,752 --> 00:07:35,868
that you don't want to die
in a crashing plane.

176
00:07:35,870 --> 00:07:37,804
Can't we discuss this
when I get back?

177
00:07:37,806 --> 00:07:38,755
What's there to discuss?

178
00:07:38,757 --> 00:07:41,708
You either love me,
or you don't.

179
00:07:41,710 --> 00:07:44,561
Walden, I'm about to leave
on an important business trip,

180
00:07:44,563 --> 00:07:46,963
and the last thing I need
right now is more pressure.

181
00:07:46,965 --> 00:07:48,181
I'm not pressuring you.

182
00:07:48,183 --> 00:07:50,216
I'm just asking you for a
simple, definitive answer

183
00:07:50,218 --> 00:07:51,601
right now before you leave.

184
00:07:51,603 --> 00:07:53,353
What was that?

185
00:07:53,355 --> 00:07:55,888
Sorry, just knocked over
your Chinese table lamp.

186
00:07:55,890 --> 00:07:57,290
Perhaps you can
buy another one

187
00:07:57,292 --> 00:07:59,609
next time you jet
to Francisco.

188
00:08:01,162 --> 00:08:02,562
It came up.

189
00:08:02,564 --> 00:08:06,116
I'm sorry, I just don't have
the time for this now, okay?

190
00:08:06,118 --> 00:08:08,084
Ava, are you dressed?

191
00:08:09,870 --> 00:08:12,839
That seems pretty
definitive to me.

192
00:08:15,576 --> 00:08:16,743
That's it.

193
00:08:16,745 --> 00:08:18,795
No more relationships.
I'm done.

194
00:08:18,797 --> 00:08:20,130
Finished; just over.

195
00:08:25,803 --> 00:08:27,137
Hi.

196
00:08:27,139 --> 00:08:29,022
Hi.

197
00:08:31,859 --> 00:08:33,393
And I'm back.

198
00:08:33,395 --> 00:08:35,395
♪ Men

199
00:08:41,350 --> 00:08:44,595
Hey, can I have 75 bucks
for the new Call of Duty?

200
00:08:44,597 --> 00:08:46,690
$75 for a video game?

201
00:08:46,692 --> 00:08:48,809
Think of it as an investment.

202
00:08:51,412 --> 00:08:53,163
An investment?

203
00:08:53,165 --> 00:08:55,415
Yeah. If I go into the
army after high school,

204
00:08:55,417 --> 00:08:58,368
I'll already know how
to kill terrorists.

205
00:08:59,537 --> 00:09:02,322
Who had corn chowder
for dinner last night?

206
00:09:02,324 --> 00:09:04,591
How do you know anybody
had corn chowder last night?

207
00:09:04,593 --> 00:09:06,680
'Cause it's dripping
all over your bathroom.

208
00:09:06,705 --> 00:09:07,905
Oh.

209
00:09:08,163 --> 00:09:09,212
Sorry about that.

210
00:09:09,214 --> 00:09:11,665
Uh, Lyndsey got a little bit...

211
00:09:11,667 --> 00:09:13,267
queasy this morning.

212
00:09:13,269 --> 00:09:14,351
Is she pregnant?

213
00:09:14,353 --> 00:09:16,553
Oh, no, no, gosh, no.

214
00:09:17,973 --> 00:09:19,673
Absolutely not.

215
00:09:21,059 --> 00:09:22,893
Here.

216
00:09:22,895 --> 00:09:23,977
Me?

217
00:09:23,979 --> 00:09:25,729
Not my girlfriend,
not my vomit,

218
00:09:25,731 --> 00:09:27,197
not my problem.

219
00:09:28,533 --> 00:09:29,533
I'll clean it up.

220
00:09:29,535 --> 00:09:30,350
You will?

221
00:09:30,352 --> 00:09:31,785
For 75 bucks.

222
00:09:31,787 --> 00:09:33,570
That's great.

223
00:09:33,572 --> 00:09:35,906
Hey, everybody.

224
00:09:37,858 --> 00:09:39,910
This is Jennifer.
Hi.

225
00:09:40,695 --> 00:09:42,713
- Hey.
- Hey.

226
00:09:43,748 --> 00:09:45,465
Well, let's go take
a walk on the beach.

227
00:09:45,467 --> 00:09:46,583
Great.

228
00:09:46,585 --> 00:09:47,701
Uh, Walden,
before you go,

229
00:09:47,703 --> 00:09:50,253
can I talk to you
for a minute?

230
00:09:54,926 --> 00:09:56,209
I'll bring him right back.

231
00:09:56,211 --> 00:09:57,644
You'd better.

232
00:10:00,848 --> 00:10:02,048
My name's Jake.

233
00:10:02,050 --> 00:10:03,567
Hi, Jake.

234
00:10:03,569 --> 00:10:07,070
My friends call me... Jake.

235
00:10:09,407 --> 00:10:10,774
What are you doing?

236
00:10:10,776 --> 00:10:12,075
Zoey made it perfectly clear.

237
00:10:12,077 --> 00:10:13,694
She doesn't love me or need me.

238
00:10:13,696 --> 00:10:15,078
So, I'm moving on.

239
00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:17,397
You left here an hour ago.

240
00:10:17,399 --> 00:10:19,249
How did you find
another girl already?

241
00:10:19,251 --> 00:10:20,734
Oh, I met her in the elevator.

242
00:10:20,736 --> 00:10:22,085
I've been in
a million elevators.

243
00:10:22,087 --> 00:10:24,538
I never once walked out
with a girl like that.

244
00:10:24,540 --> 00:10:26,456
Maybe you need to work
on your attitude.

245
00:10:26,458 --> 00:10:29,259
What exactly did Zoey say?

246
00:10:29,261 --> 00:10:30,761
<i>No, it's what she didn't say.</i>

247
00:10:30,763 --> 00:10:32,462
She didn't say, "I love you."

248
00:10:32,464 --> 00:10:35,549
Oh, please! If I insisted on
women saying "I love you""

249
00:10:35,551 --> 00:10:38,735
I'd have never have had a
girlfriend, a wife or a mother.

250
00:10:42,190 --> 00:10:44,775
Oh. It's Zoey.

251
00:10:47,061 --> 00:10:49,095
Hello?

252
00:10:49,097 --> 00:10:51,598
So, Jennifer,
how old are you?

253
00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:53,400
24. How old are you?

254
00:10:53,402 --> 00:10:55,485
I'm... 24-and-a-half.

255
00:10:55,487 --> 00:10:57,604
Hmm.

256
00:11:02,794 --> 00:11:04,961
Hmm?

257
00:11:05,747 --> 00:11:07,581
I'm surprised
that you called.

258
00:11:07,583 --> 00:11:08,799
Where are you?

259
00:11:08,801 --> 00:11:10,133
On the plane.

260
00:11:10,135 --> 00:11:11,251
We're sitting at the gate.

261
00:11:11,253 --> 00:11:12,836
- Are you okay?
- No.

262
00:11:12,838 --> 00:11:15,338
I feel miserable
about the way we left things.

263
00:11:15,340 --> 00:11:17,340
- You do?
- Yeah.

264
00:11:17,342 --> 00:11:19,459
I've just been so stressed
and busy lately

265
00:11:19,461 --> 00:11:21,595
that I haven't been able
to think straight.

266
00:11:21,597 --> 00:11:24,631
But sitting here
for the last 40 minutes

267
00:11:24,633 --> 00:11:28,468
without so much
as a bloody glass of water,

268
00:11:28,470 --> 00:11:30,804
I've come to a realization.

269
00:11:30,806 --> 00:11:32,239
I'm listening.

270
00:11:32,241 --> 00:11:34,324
The reason I haven't said...

271
00:11:34,326 --> 00:11:36,326
those words to you

272
00:11:36,328 --> 00:11:38,278
is because I'm afraid

273
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:41,581
that if I do say them,
something bad will happen.

274
00:11:41,583 --> 00:11:43,033
Why would you think that?

275
00:11:43,035 --> 00:11:44,918
'Cause it always has.

276
00:11:44,920 --> 00:11:46,837
I've only said
those words twice.

277
00:11:46,839 --> 00:11:48,988
The last time,
I ended up married

278
00:11:48,990 --> 00:11:52,175
to an insufferable twit.

279
00:11:52,177 --> 00:11:53,326
And the time before that?

280
00:11:53,328 --> 00:11:54,895
I got a thank-you note

281
00:11:54,897 --> 00:11:57,964
and a Swatch watch
from Russell Brand.

282
00:11:57,966 --> 00:11:59,599
Russell Brand?

283
00:11:59,601 --> 00:12:02,352
Mm, not my proudest moment.

284
00:12:02,354 --> 00:12:03,854
Okay. I get it.

285
00:12:03,856 --> 00:12:05,338
So, you're just superstitious
about saying it,

286
00:12:05,340 --> 00:12:08,391
but it has nothing to do with
the way that you feel about me?

287
00:12:08,393 --> 00:12:10,977
No. Not at all.

288
00:12:10,979 --> 00:12:13,346
In fact, the whole reason
I called is

289
00:12:13,348 --> 00:12:14,948
to tell you that I honestly
I...

290
00:12:14,950 --> 00:12:16,450
Oh, there you are.

291
00:12:16,452 --> 00:12:20,153
Ooh! Cool bedroom.

292
00:12:20,155 --> 00:12:21,037
Who's that?

293
00:12:21,039 --> 00:12:24,207
Uh... Berta.

294
00:12:24,209 --> 00:12:27,043
You couldn't even wait
till my plane takes off?!

295
00:12:27,045 --> 00:12:29,162
No, no, Zoey, it's not what you think!
Oh, good-bye, Walden.

296
00:12:29,164 --> 00:12:31,498
Zoey, just...

297
00:12:32,800 --> 00:12:35,385
♪ Awkward!

298
00:12:44,712 --> 00:12:48,648
Oh... I can't believe I kissed
the mouth that did this.

299
00:12:50,184 --> 00:12:52,886
Alan, I need to
talk to you. Oh!

300
00:12:54,238 --> 00:12:55,889
Can we do it out here?

301
00:12:55,891 --> 00:12:57,491
Gladly.

302
00:12:57,493 --> 00:12:58,909
Oh, good Lord!

303
00:12:58,911 --> 00:13:01,912
Looks like someone
cleaned a deer in the bathtub.

304
00:13:04,248 --> 00:13:05,448
What's going on?

305
00:13:05,450 --> 00:13:06,900
Zoey FaceTimed me
from the plane

306
00:13:06,902 --> 00:13:08,418
to tell me that she loves me.

307
00:13:08,420 --> 00:13:08,940
Good.

308
00:13:08,965 --> 00:13:10,495
But she saw Jennifer
in my bedroom.

309
00:13:10,496 --> 00:13:11,176
Bad.

310
00:13:11,201 --> 00:13:13,036
So, naturally, I immediately
tried to call her back.

311
00:13:13,041 --> 00:13:14,541
Good.
But she wouldn't answer.

312
00:13:14,543 --> 00:13:15,959
Bad.
So I'm gonna fuel up my jet,

313
00:13:15,961 --> 00:13:17,427
and fly to London
and beg for forgiveness.

314
00:13:17,429 --> 00:13:19,930
Good.
Will you stop that, Alan?

315
00:13:19,932 --> 00:13:22,098
I-I need you to come with me.
Me? Why?

316
00:13:22,100 --> 00:13:23,884
Because I might need a witness,
and you can say

317
00:13:23,886 --> 00:13:25,352
that you saw that
nothing happened with Jennifer.

318
00:13:25,354 --> 00:13:26,770
Great. I'm your man.

319
00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:31,107
I am not gonna touch that glove.

320
00:13:32,092 --> 00:13:33,109
Come on.

321
00:13:33,111 --> 00:13:34,361
Oh, uh, wait.

322
00:13:34,363 --> 00:13:35,979
I promised Lyndsey
I'd take her out

323
00:13:35,981 --> 00:13:37,480
to a big, fancy,
romantic dinner tonight.

324
00:13:37,482 --> 00:13:38,615
Bring her.
Really?

325
00:13:38,617 --> 00:13:39,432
Yeah, sure.

326
00:13:39,434 --> 00:13:40,600
Well, I guess a private jet

327
00:13:40,602 --> 00:13:41,701
to London does beat

328
00:13:41,703 --> 00:13:43,653
an 11-year-old Volvo
to the Olive Garden.

329
00:13:43,655 --> 00:13:45,071
I'll-I'll pack a bag.

330
00:13:45,073 --> 00:13:46,206
No, no, no, there's no time.

331
00:13:46,208 --> 00:13:47,574
I'll buy you whatever you need
in London.

332
00:13:47,576 --> 00:13:49,042
You're kidding.
Yeah. Come on.

333
00:13:49,044 --> 00:13:51,044
Hey, if Zoey won't say it,
I will.

334
00:13:51,046 --> 00:13:53,279
I love you, Walden Schmidt.

335
00:14:03,291 --> 00:14:04,891
Thank you, Walden.

336
00:14:04,893 --> 00:14:06,810
This is just incredible.

337
00:14:06,812 --> 00:14:08,428
Glad you like it.
Mm.

338
00:14:08,430 --> 00:14:10,397
What did your son say
when you told him

339
00:14:10,399 --> 00:14:11,648
you were flying
to London tonight?

340
00:14:11,650 --> 00:14:14,584
He told me to bring him back
some English pot.

341
00:14:16,020 --> 00:14:19,239
This is definitely
the way to travel.

342
00:14:19,241 --> 00:14:21,641
No boarding passes,
no airport security,

343
00:14:21,643 --> 00:14:22,943
none of those scanners

344
00:14:22,945 --> 00:14:24,995
that show strangers
the size of your dingle.

345
00:14:24,997 --> 00:14:28,498
Don't you worry about
your dingle, honey.

346
00:14:28,500 --> 00:14:30,951
He's a grower, not a shower.

347
00:14:30,953 --> 00:14:32,151
Yeah, he told me.

348
00:14:32,153 --> 00:14:34,087
He tells everyone.

349
00:14:40,077 --> 00:14:42,412
Can I interest
you in a brewski?

350
00:14:43,447 --> 00:14:44,447
What?

351
00:14:44,449 --> 00:14:45,515
That's Polish for

352
00:14:45,517 --> 00:14:47,801
"Do you want a beer?"

353
00:14:47,803 --> 00:14:50,103
I've traveled
extensively through Asia.

354
00:14:51,606 --> 00:14:53,807
Oh. Thanks.

355
00:14:55,843 --> 00:14:58,194
Are you sure Walden said
he'd be right back?

356
00:14:58,196 --> 00:14:59,696
Forget Walden.

357
00:14:59,698 --> 00:15:01,347
Let's talk about us.

358
00:15:01,349 --> 00:15:02,616
Us?

359
00:15:02,618 --> 00:15:04,668
That's English
for you and me.

360
00:15:09,907 --> 00:15:12,158
♪ Poppin' bottles in the ice

361
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:13,543
♪ Like a blizzard

362
00:15:13,545 --> 00:15:15,712
♪ When we drunk, we do it right,
gettin' slizzard ♪

363
00:15:15,714 --> 00:15:17,631
♪ Like a G-6, like a G-6...

364
00:15:17,633 --> 00:15:19,382
Uh, honey, honey,
why don't you take your seat

365
00:15:19,384 --> 00:15:20,550
and put your seatbelt on?

366
00:15:20,552 --> 00:15:22,702
Pish, pish, party pooper.

367
00:15:22,704 --> 00:15:27,223
Wally, this is so romantic
what you're doing.

368
00:15:27,225 --> 00:15:30,593
You are flying
across a whole ocean

369
00:15:30,595 --> 00:15:33,263
just to win back
the woman you love.

370
00:15:33,265 --> 00:15:35,515
Thank you.

371
00:15:35,517 --> 00:15:38,818
Alan, sweetie,
I need to tell you something.

372
00:15:38,820 --> 00:15:40,053
Yeah?

373
00:15:40,055 --> 00:15:42,105
I know I give you a hard time,

374
00:15:42,107 --> 00:15:44,774
but in my heart,

375
00:15:44,776 --> 00:15:48,778
I really, really
love...

376
00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:52,666
Oh, God!

377
00:15:52,668 --> 00:15:54,501
Oh. Aah.

378
00:15:54,503 --> 00:15:55,618
I'm so sorry.

379
00:15:55,620 --> 00:15:56,703
Oh! Oh!

380
00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:58,404
Oh. Oh.

381
00:15:58,406 --> 00:15:59,756
So sorry.
Here. Here.

382
00:15:59,758 --> 00:16:01,174
Oh, thank you.

383
00:16:03,211 --> 00:16:04,410
Oh, God!

384
00:16:04,412 --> 00:16:06,413
Oh!
Oh, my God!

385
00:16:06,415 --> 00:16:07,681
Oh, hang on.
Oh, God!

386
00:16:07,683 --> 00:16:09,265
I'll-I'll get...
I'll get some towels.

387
00:16:11,419 --> 00:16:12,852
<i>Okay, folks,</i>

388
00:16:12,854 --> 00:16:14,771
<i>we've got clear skies ahead,</i>

389
00:16:14,773 --> 00:16:17,607
<i>and we'll be in London
in approximately four hours.</i>

390
00:16:17,609 --> 00:16:20,443
<i>So, just sit back and enjoy
the rest of your flight.</i>

391
00:16:23,749 --> 00:16:26,483
♪ Men.

392
00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:28,618
Bottom line, Zoey,
I can assure you

393
00:16:28,620 --> 00:16:31,287
that nothing happened
between Walden and that woman.

394
00:16:31,289 --> 00:16:32,455
Really?

395
00:16:32,457 --> 00:16:34,708
What possible reason
would I have to lie to you?

396
00:16:34,710 --> 00:16:35,942
Well, for one thing, he gave

397
00:16:35,944 --> 00:16:37,777
you and Lyndsey a
free trip to London,

398
00:16:37,779 --> 00:16:39,412
where you all
inexplicably decided

399
00:16:39,414 --> 00:16:41,698
to dress up
like Japanese tourists.

400
00:16:43,167 --> 00:16:44,250
That's my fault.

401
00:16:44,252 --> 00:16:46,302
I kind of threw up
on them a little.

402
00:16:46,304 --> 00:16:48,588
A little?
I might have to get a new plane.

403
00:16:48,590 --> 00:16:51,474
Yes, yes, yes, that's
all very interesting,

404
00:16:51,476 --> 00:16:52,625
but the fact remains

405
00:16:52,627 --> 00:16:54,427
that you still invited
my neighbor Jennifer--

406
00:16:54,429 --> 00:16:55,895
the whore
from the seventh floor--

407
00:16:55,897 --> 00:16:57,013
back to your house.

408
00:16:57,015 --> 00:16:58,765
Yeah, but nothing happened.

409
00:16:58,767 --> 00:17:01,568
Nothing happened 'cause
I called and interrupted you!

410
00:17:01,570 --> 00:17:05,155
Okay, I think we're saying
the same thing here.

411
00:17:05,157 --> 00:17:06,973
Listen, the fact is, I love you.

412
00:17:06,975 --> 00:17:09,576
Okay, and I was an idiot
to put pressure on you,

413
00:17:09,578 --> 00:17:14,381
I made a terrible mistake,
and I'm very, very sorry.

414
00:17:19,703 --> 00:17:23,156
Okay. Uh, we sh...

415
00:17:23,158 --> 00:17:25,291
I think we should go.

416
00:17:29,180 --> 00:17:30,830
I do love you, Walden.

417
00:17:32,850 --> 00:17:34,868
You do?

418
00:17:34,870 --> 00:17:36,853
Of course I do.

419
00:17:36,855 --> 00:17:39,606
That's why I called you
from the plane, you ninny.

420
00:17:41,442 --> 00:17:43,476
So...

421
00:17:43,478 --> 00:17:45,445
you forgive me?

422
00:17:45,447 --> 00:17:47,113
Well, that depends.

423
00:17:47,115 --> 00:17:49,732
Do I have to worry every time
we have a fight

424
00:17:49,734 --> 00:17:52,368
that you're going to go out
and pick up another woman?

425
00:17:52,370 --> 00:17:55,455
Not as long
as I know that you love me.

426
00:17:55,457 --> 00:17:57,624
Good answer.

427
00:17:59,376 --> 00:18:01,527
Come here.

428
00:18:12,506 --> 00:18:14,541
I love you, Lyndsey.

429
00:18:14,543 --> 00:18:17,727
And I love you.

430
00:18:19,931 --> 00:18:21,898
Oh, not in my mouth!

431
00:18:21,900 --> 00:18:23,600
Oh, God.

432
00:18:23,602 --> 00:18:25,068
Oh, dear.

433
00:18:39,227 --> 00:18:41,728
No, seriously, dude. No lie.

434
00:18:41,730 --> 00:18:45,315
All right, fine,
you don't believe me? Here.

435
00:18:48,603 --> 00:18:53,473
Yup. Five times.
Best half hour of my life.